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Well in the old days Cody would have been like 3 or 4 years old.

Which would've been much better suited to, say, Rob Terry & Mason Ryan.

So this was pretty fucking extraordinary. http://youtu.be/ME_lVe9s3js

To add more cherry to the top of the asshole sundae, don't forget that all of that was during my one-on-one deathmatch with the guy.I had just joined and caught up with the pack, when I see the dude and kill him. I don't know why he sent me the deathmatch invite, because y'all were already whipping his ass. But all I know is I barely finish saying, "Haha, this dude just sent me a one-" In unison: "ACCEPT IT!!!" It's the only deathmatch I know that's ended 0-0 because I spent the whole time running around keeping the guy busy while the other three just blew him to smithereens repeatedly. The kid got lucky and shot Robert out of his personal vehicle, so Robert couldn't see it on the map when he respawned. I just happened to spot it, and was on my way to get in it and deliver it to Robert for attempt number two, when it went up in flames. Cue Robert - Shit...I just blew it up, didn't I? It deserved to be blown up anyway. Ugly purple ass big spoiler having thing. It looked like a poor man's version of Richard Petty's blue Super Bee. Edit: Just remembered I took a picture of it for posterity.

Honestly - they should just go with Impact Wrestling as their name

Are 'brass ring' comments the new 'best for business' comments? I hope not. Neither shit is funny.

Well Chris and I are the kings of what Mis calls "want to give something a hug" We are the Bayleys of the GTA crew

Dear god WWE...go back to two hour RAWs...immediately.

Philly doesn't usually have terrible crowds that only react to guys that have been in ROH. Royal Rumble usually has more outsiders so a whole lot of Todd Martin's coming into town could hurt this show. This is abnormal though and the people here usually react liberally. That is what makes it a good wrestling town. Crowd full of Johnny Sorrows and Greggulators that like a variety of different things. People out of their minds that Jerry Lawler is about to grab the belt to beat Miz. Not shitting on the match because Miz is in it. Please don't give us the rep of only reacting to 3 or 4 guys. It isn't accurate and completely misses the point of why this is a good wrestling town.

"I asked my friend who doesn't watch wrestling to name some of the current WWE Superstars"

You guys know Kross died, right? Or Kriss?

Real men grab guns. Brass rings are for pussies.

Allah Akbaring the guy with his own car would've been up there with killing the guy in passive in the pool. I'm surprised we all haven't been sent to juvie by now. It was an ugly car. Some dude from the AV Club wrote some stupid piece about why people live where they live in Los Santos and I tore down his argument with a little game history (everyone lives in Eclipse Towers 'cause during the billionaire days, everyone bought the most expensive apartment at the time, screw it). He posted a picture of himself with his white and red Panto, and I commented "dude, if I see you in Freemode in that thing, I will not rest until I blow up that car." Some cars are just in need of a good blowin' up. It's the most pointlessly fun thing in the game.

Happy birthday?

Just like the new Personal Conduct Policy, here's another week of terrible football unilaterally forced upon you! Yes it's another exciting edition of...... Top of the Bottom: The Quest for the Goodell Trophy!!! Yes this week is so exciting the three exclamation points were needed! Quickly, to the rankings! 1) 2-11 Tennessee 2) 2-11 Jacksonville 3) 2-11 Tampa Bay 4) 2-11 New York (Not Really Playing) Football Jets 5) 2-11 Oakland 6) 3-10 Washington 7) 4-9 New York Football Beckhams 8) 4-8-1 Carolina 9) 5-9 New Orleans 10) 5-9 Chicago Teams Eliminated: Minnesota, St. Louis Great googily moogily! What looked like a slam-dunk Raiders "win" has now turned into a five-team slobberknocker! Not only that we get to welcome the Titans to the top of the charts, meaning they join the ranks of the Jags and Raiders as the kings of terrible football this year! But serious look at the top rankings, mere fractions of a percent separate those five teams from the promised land. It could quite possibly come down to the final adjusted strength of schedule to sort this craziness out; truly football at it's (un)finest! Will Tennessee be able to stay on top? Over the next two weeks they play two of the teams they are tied with and we are not talking about teams known for randomly pulling out a win here. It will take some amazing feats of terribleness from the Titans to out-suck the Jets and Jags. But nothing short of a loss will suffice to stay at the top of the bottom! Those top five teams should be glad this is the NFL and not the NCAA though, they don't accept co-champs over there! And how about them Raiders? They just managed to double their win total for the season and pay the price by dropping down four spots; not to mention probably costing some bookies in Vegas some cheddar. I hope it was worth it! And speaking of teams falling down the rankings, we must bid a bon voyage to the Rams, who got themselves eliminated from contention in the most amazing way possible. Nothing like styling on a team by having their draft bounty from the RGIII trade out for the coin-toss and then giving Washington a complimentary loss on the way out. Too bad you guys don't have any of Washington's draft picks this year, it would be the gift that keeps on giving! And I would be remiss mentioning the Bucs and Panthers are playing each other this week in a key rankings match-up. I know the Panthers are rivals and all, but I wish Cam a speedy and safe recovery. That being said you would think that would make the Bucs a shoe in for a win this week; but this is Top of the Bottom, we don't do no thinking around here! The fact is that backup QB Derek Anderson was the man who slapped the Bucs around at the start of the season. So I will make the bold prediction and say one team will in fact lose! So tune in next week as we wind down the season and queue up your Kevin Garnett clips because ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE!

So I guess choking someone until they die will be allowed in the new NFL policy At the risk of starting a conversation we don't need to be having, that dude actually died from being placed facedown with his hands behind him, not the choke. Position asphyxia, it's called. Jae's standing right over there with a gigantic scimitar that he's not afraid to use.

Am I the only one that dislikes the NFL "No More" domestic violence ads? In particular the one with Cris Carter and the other guys all "unable to talk"? I mean, I get what they're going for with the ads. I just find them really fake and...I dunno, something about them just rubs me wrong. I'm supposed to buy Cris Carter is moved to tears and unable to talk about this subject when he goes to work every day next to a guy that very possibly killed two people? C'mon. And I'm embarrassed that I can only name like one or two of the guys in each ad.

Remember when we were dubious about whether or not this franchise needed revival? Yeah, we were all idiots. This is going to fucking rule. Nick Hoult is recovering well from the Jack The Giant Slayer debacle with Warm Bodies, DoFP and now this movie with ridiculously badass potential..

So I guess choking someone until they die will be allowed in the new NFL policy

Which is also the name of my laundry service for men with unfaithful wives.

Why else would anyone watch that movie? I've seen better film on teeth.

The same world where Vince McMahon thinks the Stone Cold character is based on him.

It can't be that expensive can it? Can we crowd source it and hire BEN! as the booker? If Ben was the booker, they'd be out of business by 12/29. Or whenever Bunkhouse Buck walks out on him.

Glad we got to put the band back together last night, even if it was only for a little while before technical shit started rearing its ugly head. Had a lot of good laughs. Plus, the return of ba-ding! Melraz would've loved that last room we got stuck in. It was a sniper's paradise for most of the time. People that had no business trying to snipe kept giving it a go, and paying the price. One guy in particular got killed from the westside Ammunation, all the way up into the hills north of town, then back down to Chinatown. Poor guy had no situational awareness. About halfway through, I was sitting up on a hill waiting for him to respawn after Stout sniped him out of a car. I saw him start running toward a parked car, and I was thinking to myself "surely he's not gonna try that". Of course, he did, and he paid the price. I had the shot lined up on the back window of the car for at least 10 seconds before he got in the car. Poor bastard. Blew up more personal vehicles than I probably should've, but I really couldn't help it. Suckers kept trying that backwards Zentorno/Entity shit, and they needed to be taught a lesson. Still sad I didn't manage to allah akbar that one guy while I was driving his purple Superbird, though. One of my old crew from Cell Block 10 was in that one room. I wanted to tell him to take that damn dunce cap off. Us ex cons gotta keep our heads down and try to blend in. I might have to bring my female character out of mothballs to see if she's still wearing that thing. It was one of those nights where somebody new would kill me and the game would tell me I was up 12-2 on them. That type of shit just kept happening over and over. chevygirl got me after I had killed her one time, and the game told me I was up about 45 to 5 on her. How the hell do I not remember that? Ran into a bunch of tanks for some reason, but none of them were much of a danger. Got one guy to accidentally blow up his own tank once, then drove a sticky bomb laden car under him after he went and got another. No jets to speak of. I only remember one, and that guy crashed into a palm tree right in front of us. Got a good laugh at the expense of one dumbass that thought they were in passive and walked up to me doing the air thrusting shit. Shotgun to the face sorted that out for them. And, yeah we've always been shitty at team tactics. We drove JT crazy. He'd be trying to form us into a cohesive fighting unit, and we'd all get distracted by something shiny and chase halfway across the map after it. I'm probably the worst at it. I see 8 dots in a group, and I can't help it. I gotta go say hello in the traditional nite shift way.

Philly fans:

Philly is the best wrestling city in the country and has been for ages. It was maybe the one place that was both WWF and NWA central. Didn't they both run sell-out shows at the same time here or something along those lines? That continued for ages. ECW. And even the precursor to ECW (Tri-State) was pretty great. Say what you want about ECW and its fans in retrospect, but at the time ECW was the best and coolest. It's the home base of Ring of Honor, CZW and Chikara. (Unless some of them moved since I last checked.) ROH is the American workrate promotion. CZW is carrying the garbage wrestling banner. And Chikara is a cartoon come-to-life. You can't get more diverse than that for your wrestling tastes. The Rumble sold out in like 5 minutes. There might be loud smarks all night but that show is going to be a total blast and a lot of fun. There will probably be some CM Punk chants, but those chants are everywhere at this point.

Maybe we can get Fox news on board. Keep the X in XMas.

That may also be the problem- For everything that HHH gets, the one difference is that he seems to get that pro wrestling is now officially "the geeks' sport" and is trying to adjust WWE as a whole to reflect that going forward, WWE is at its peak as one of many parts of geek culture. Vince McMahon, on the other hand- is an alpha male, and wants the WWE to appeal to other alpha males- so wrestlers who appeal to geeks and different subsets of it- which can make the casual adult fans get interested, will never succeed as well as someone who can presumably get those alpha males Vince WANTS to like the show back into the fold. I've been saying this for some time and could not agree more. That WWE is blowing this opening to feed of of geek culture - and the money and tech savvy that's there - is absurd. The sort of irony being that Punk is running off to the UFC, where most of the WWE's meathead crowd ran off to.

Vince purchased all the RobTerry matches for his "personal" collection. The tapes are stored in a vault with vasoline, an old t shirt,and a life sized HHH standee.

"he is a fucking unlikeable, cynical asshole" The irony is delicious.

Neville is acting how Hulk Hogan always acted when we were kids but now you get called on that kind of stuff

The Bourne movies fucked nobody except people wiling to accept film editing by mentally ill people as professional work. Which, I guess, explains Quantum of Solace.

I now imagine all of the stars who've played in the triangle sitting around, smoking cigars, and laughing at Melo/JR Smith. When Rodman comes out of his drunken stupor to talk shit about you--you.Are.FUCKED.

Its called an epileptic seizure.

NATHAN JONES THE COLOSSUS OF BOGGO ROAD

I assume this exchange makes some sense if you've seen the movie? Ready To Rumble is the best movie you'll ever see about Jerry Lawler. I think it's a good piece of pro-wrestling booking in movie form. Good guy is on top for a while, gets cocky and loses. Fights his way back with the help of his friends, wins back his self-respect, fans and title. Jimmy King>John Cena. WWKD

This just makes me want to watch The Rock run around as CJ from Grand Theft Auto. Which would have been a much better movie IMO

I said he should have been Bobby Jamaica godammit!

Viewing the Saturday Night Main Event from right before Wrestlemania III, two random observations: 1. It's stunning how much the opening segment, with brief 20-second promos from each wrestler highlighted on the show got me way more excited to watch this than the "last week on RAW/followed by 20-minute opening promo" gets me for RAW. I definitely think it would be worth experimenting with doing something like that at the start of RAW every now and then - or even an episode where they have one of these at the start of every hour. It just seems like the more I watch '80s WWF that little touches that were meant to draw the casual viewer back then and get them caught up on storylines quickly could be easily more effective even in 2014 than the current formula. 2. I know the touring cycles were different back then, but it also seems nuts in hindsight that they ran a major Saturday Night's Main Event taping in Detroit a mere five weeks before they were back in the area for Wrestlemania III. It's a good testament to how hot the WWF product was back then that they drew 20,000 people for this taping and then fairly immediately after filled the Silverdome.

If this isn't the goal song they're doing it wrong.

I have mentally disavowed the Matrix sequels the same way i refuse to accept that there were any Highlander movies made other than the first film. This is how The Matrix ended: Neo soars into the cyber sky. Hard cut to black.

I guarantee this is the first time a wrestling board post ever started off like this.