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2014 MOVIE OMNIBUS THREAD


RIPPA

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So I watched Cobra for the first time in ages the other night. I got it for like $5 dollars at Best Buy a while back and it was worth every penny. For starters it's the best proof of the theory that you NEVER...EVER cast a girlfriend or wife in a film you are doing especially if she's playing opposite you.

 

The film is so gloriously mid 1980's. Apparently there is a cut of the film that actually makes sense and got a legit X rating for violence, but Stallone and company scrapped that version to chop it into what was released because it was going up against Top Gun its opening weekend.

 

Also watched Short Circuit and man it's amazing to think that in the mid 80's we were so sure we would have these amazing robots that could do anything. 30 years later and we still don't have hunter killer robots that can also make a gin and tonic. I still heart Ally Sheedy though.

 

And I watched Blade Runner: The Directors Cut. I hadn't seen Blade Runner in so long that I forgot how trippy a lot of it was. Gonna move up to The Final Cut when I get a chance to see how much of a difference there is.

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Any early buzz on John Wick?  Am thinking about seeing it this weekend...

 

There is no "thinking about it," here.  Matinee Saturday at the Waugh Chapel Regal Cinemas, JT will be in the house.

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Saw Kumiko The Treasure Hunter last night.  Rinko Kikuchi gets her hands on a VHS tape of Fargo, thinks it's real because it says at the beginning that it's a true story, and flies from Tokyo to Minnesota to look for the suitcase full of money that Steve Buscemi buried in the snow.  Saddest movie I've seen in quite a while.  She ditched her pet rabbit before she left :(

 

I know there were points during the movie where I was thinking "Well, she seems crazy, but she's not - she just got fooled by Fargo" but I'm seeing review blurbs saying it's a character study of a mentally ill person, and that's making me think on it a little more, specifically how much of what the character does is due to her own unbalanced brain chemistry vs. being in a country where she knows no one and barely speaks the language.

 

edit: I think modern Japanese stereotypes might play into it as well.  Like if I see a native Japanese person acting in an eccentric way, I assume that's just the endearingly quirky way that the culture behaves, rather than thinking there's something actually wrong with them.

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Speaking of ridiculous scenes in action films, I just turned on Sudden Death with Jean-Claude Van Damme and Powers Boothe. JCVD just had a karate fight with a woman wearing a penguin hockey mascot costume in a kitchen. Yep. I saw this with my dad when it came out and I knew there had to be a reason to turn it on again. Plus Powers Boothe told JCVD's daughter he was gonna fill her mouth up with spiders!

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Wasn't that the movie where they mentioned that a terrorist takeover on the arena it was set in had been averted...but if it hadn't, here's what could have went down?

 

I always loved that idea. Maybe we could get that "Mark Wahlberg stops 9/11" action movie at long last.

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I had an movie idea where this one guy had to stop this crazy war vet and his crazy hot German terrorist girlfriend from running a Goodyear blimp into the SuperBowl. I am pretty sure we can get Antje Traue for the girlfriend role. I am surprised no one else has come up with it.

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That was the only thing I vaguely remembered too, aside from them opening the dome at the end. The plot is that Powers is a rogue Secret Service agent holding the vice president hostage at the hockey game after him and his henchmen (of whom there are plenty) have planted bombs all over the arena. It's pretty much Under Siege if you took every element and slightly tweaked it -- Van Damme is a fire marshal where Seagal was a cook, Powers is SS instead of Tommy Lee Jones' Black Ops guy, the bad guys are all working from the inside, it's a hockey game and not a party on a boat, etc. Basically all the same shit though and you could pick a worse picture to rip off.

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RE: Renee Zellweger.

 

On one hand, it's so fucked up how people spent years giving her grief for her unconventional (but still very pretty) looks and then act all disgusted when her insecurities inevitably lead to her to getting surgery. No wonder women in Hollywood get as paranoid about aging.

 

That said, it is jaw-dropping how much different she looks now. It's not even like Travolta or Goldie Hawn where she looks terrible but still like herself. She looks good...but like an entirely different woman. I'm not sure if I've ever seen that before.

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Yeah, but I think you'd still be able to guess it was her after a few moments.

 

If you showed that Renee picture to someone and told them to guess who it was, I don't think they'd ever get it.

 

She maybe is a little obscure, but Daphne Rubin-Vega went from looking like a 25 year old dark skinned Latina to a 60 year old light skinned Latina in the span of 5 years. I am convinced that the girl in Wild Things is a totally different chick.

 

I brought up Melanie Griffith about a few months back. She looks like she met the business end of a floor buffer.

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And I watched Blade Runner: The Directors Cut. I hadn't seen Blade Runner in so long that I forgot how trippy a lot of it was. Gonna move up to The Final Cut when I get a chance to see how much of a difference there is.

Don't expect much difference.  The two cuts are basically identical in terms of content.  The Final Cut just cleans up a few little mistakes and shaky visuals from the original, changes like two words of dialogue, and that's about it.  It's still the definitive cut and easily the prettiest-looking remastered print, but it's still essentially the exact same movie as the Director's Cut.  

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Yeah, but I think you'd still be able to guess it was her after a few moments.

 

If you showed that Renee picture to someone and told them to guess who it was, I don't think they'd ever get it.

 

She maybe is a little obscure, but Daphne Rubin-Vega went from looking like a 25 year old dark skinned Latina to a 60 year old light skinned Latina in the span of 5 years. I am convinced that the girl in Wild Things is a totally different chick.

 

I brought up Melanie Griffith about a few months back. She looks like she met the business end of a floor buffer.

 

Whatever surgery Meg Ryan had was not productive either.  Watching Stockard Channing on the Good Wfie makes me sad, as she now has the "cat lady" thing going.

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I just had to google Renee Zellwegger. I have no idea who this woman is pretending to be Renee Zellweger. I'm not surprised she looks so different. Sometime around Appaloosa she did something that kinda jacked her features a bit and it needed straightening out.

 

It's really too bad she got started on this road, because her face was so expressive and infectiously alive. Whatever floats your boat, I guess.

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Plastic Surgery just makes you look like you've had plastic surgery. I can't think of a time plastic surgery actually benefited anyone's looks.

ScarJo says hello.
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