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Father and Son.

Smackdown falls on Halloween this year. If the former Bollywood Boyz aren't dressed in Dr. Suess-type outfits as "Singh 1 and Singh 2," I'll be thoroughly disappointed.

Damn that opening segment was everything. Fucking beautiful. Braun like "The only thing I care about is PILING BODIES!!" This security guard deserves a bonus

I think if you can legit no sell a flamethrower (remember Elimination Chamber 2010), you get to pick and choose what you kayfabe sell.

Sasha keeps having everyone's best match. She's still, like, ten percent slower on everything than she thinks she is, but somehow it doesn't matter. The matches are put together well, and the crowd always reacts. Pretty much the moment we're down on any woman, Sasha can hand them a showcase. Given she already worked in two forearm exachanges and a pop up from a knee strike into another knee strike tonight, maybe she should just be the one to work Nakamura?

Of all the ways they could go with Kurt/Jason... 1) The Watts Stratagem: Kurt cluelessly pushing his son and accidentally turning him heel, which is Kurt's natural status but not Jason's 2) The Russo Elective: Jason lying about the whole thing and turning out to be a natural heel using Kurt 3) The "Young O.J." allegory: Jason being a smiling happy star in interviews and then having a mean streak and losing control in his matches and being a total psychopath 4) The "WWE Creative guys resent being around women who can mostly beat them up": Having Emma come in to be the evil bitch that turns him heel because girls ammiright? Three of those could be fine. One would suck so hard.

Personally, I don't want Heenan to say nice things about Hogan. Even knowing they didn't shoot hate each other feels wrong.

Guys! Talking Smack is back.... on Tout!

When you're betting on pro wresrling, it might be time to seek out help. If you or someone you know has a gambling problem: 1-800-Gambler I don't gamble, but I assume one of the greatest jobbers of all time, The Gambler, does not answer the phone.

He could be Dallas Machine.

Maybe Cass should invest in one. Skinny-fat Test is the best way to describe him. Sadly for Cass, I don't think he'll ever be as over as Test when he wrestled Shane O Mac at Summerslam '99.

Grossest thing in this thread so far.

Please don't believe the Irish Insider's nonsense

No worries. Our tests have demonstrated that on a clear day with little to no wind, the Star Wars Dragon Defense and Intercept system can easily destroy any dragon flying directly toward it, not breathing fire on it, not zig zagging in any way, and maintaining a perfect level attitude and altitude and a perfectly straight neck, upwards of 16% of the time.* * Note: we have only tested this on one previously deceased dragon that was sitting in our basement where we built the Star Wars Dragon Defense and Intercept System directly in front of it. We have not yet attempted to move the Star Wars Dragon Defense and Intercept system from our basement because it is very delicate and the steps are very narrow. However you will notice that n the time we since we built the Star Wars Dragon Defense and Intercept System exactly 0 times has that previously deceased dragon successfully attacked King's Landing.

I like the idea that this whole episode was about people remembering or trying to remember their role: Deanarys remembers "Hey, Varys, I am a fucking totalitarian and I think I'd like to see someone dribble piss down their pant leg right now!" Arya remembering "Hey, I'm a wolf/psychopath...fuck home...my home is a river of my enemies blood!" Jon remembering "Hey, I'm a Stark! I need to do something butch and dumb that will get me shivved!" Theon remembering, "Oh yeah...I'm Reek and this world is not for me!" And the Dornish remembering "Oh, yeah. We suck at pretty much everything!"

Unless it was a promo, in which case Terry Funk would say "Fuck you, you low down, good for nothing, egg sucking son of a whore! You're a dirty dog! You're less than a dog!" Foul mouthed Terry Funk is best Terry Funk.

"Iron Anderson has always been a walk-behinder!" "The view never changes, baby!"

You have to add "weekly" in there because soap operas have RAW beat by an enormous amount.

I support this as long as the fake Machines still hail from the Japanese island of Fuyutu..

I mean...

Their finisher was actually a pop up belly to back suplex.

Terry Funk says, "Go fuck yourself." Actually, he probably wouldn't, because he's a really nice guy. But you get my point.

Sounds like something that would've made the old WCW Observer quotes thread.

They could spew a refreshing seabreeze.

I'm semi-stealing a line I saw, but The Disgusting Adventures of Samwell Tarly is the worst thing to ever happen to television. I WAS EATING VANILLA ICE CREAM, YOU MOTHERFUCKERS.

Since the discussion of mist spots has come up

Also, the return of Shane Jitsu as he taps Owens out to the world's shittiest triangle choke.

This is one of the few times I remember enjoying HHH during that time and I laughed out loud when he was cutting a promo on the plant he thought was Bischoff.

I'm blanking if we have the cage match or not actually. I'll go back and look later. That was from a music video. In the meantime,

Here's some bits of (fantastic) news from Carlizilla after he did some poking around in the game's code: Fuck.yes.

There is now nothing I want more than for Lin-Manuel Miranda to create a Broadway musical based on the kayfabe career of Hulk Hogan, so fuck you for making me want something I can never have.

Okay, yeah. Gordy making an entire venue run for the hills wins. Now I want to see that versus the "NOBODY POTATOES ME" Hansen freakout.

At one point in '96, Heenan said flat out that he'd actually appreciate what the nWo were trying to do if Hogan wasn't part of it. Hogan is Heenan's line - he proved he was right after a decade of telling people Hogan was no good. If anything, Heenan should CONTINUE screaming about it because he's the BRAIN and HE WAS RIGHT.

SANADA's on weed and Dianabol?

Maybe it was her "I'm being left off Summer Slam fuck this shit" face. Drifter was awesome in NXT as well. They just never gave him much to do.

Can we mention how the crowd during Sasha/Bayley was flat initially but by the end the place was going nuts with dueling chants and shit? That was the closest I've felt to the NXT 4 Horsewomen era since they've all been called up.

I for one welcome the fact that a wrestler with amateur credentials isn't using an ankle lock as a go-to move for once

Perhaps a city planner?

Yup. I'd love to see him in New Japan, in any capacity.

Super Sheriff Seth Bullock.

Could go with this:

From Main Event'ers to Main Eventers: The Bo Dallas & Curtis Axel Story

Just assume that every storyline is being told at a different pace so they all converge at the same time. Think of it like you are meeting friends for a dinner reservation. Some people live closer to the restaurant, some people live farther away, others drive faster, and others drive slower, if they all get to the place at 8, why does the pace of how they got there matter?

Whatever the Singh brothers are being paid, it's not enough.

And the cure to greyscale is...to cut off all the greyscale.

Nakamura is gonna pull a Rusev and rediscover his Chinese heritage, isn't he?

So I gave up on watching the PP match, but when I later read that Khali came out, I had the biggest "oh fuuuuuck this" reaction. Jinder fucking sucks. His gimmick is shit. He's a shit wrestler. And you could stick anyone in this evil foreigner that's better than you role and people would boo it or shit on it because it's lame. Meanwhile, on Raw, Samoa Joe and Brock have had one hell of a program and now it looks like we'll get Brock vs Roman vs Braun vs Joe. What a difference a year makes because last year SDL was way more entertaining than Raw.

It still blows my mind they didn't return Rusev as a face. It's almost as dumb as never face turning Bray.