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Everything posted by piranesi

  1. If Vince does nothing this year but poach any of the costume designers for Kpop boyband videos, 2020 will be redeemed for the whole world and wrestling will be saved.
  2. There is no better line of dialog to bump into when watching a movie than this: Guy: "We'll never catch them this way. We'll have to cut through the Forbidden Zone." Other Guy: "The Forbidden Zone?" Me: oH, shit... alternate version: Guy: "We'll never catch them this way. We'll have to cut through the Forbidden Zone." Other Guy: "The Forbidden Zone? You seriously named it the Forbidden Zone? Like, you couldn't be more helpful like "he don't go here because there are giant spiders zone or the If you touch the water here you will turn into a blob of flesh"zone?? Note; The particular movie in question tonight where this line was spoken was the Roger Corman/Cirio Santiago post-apocalypse movie THE SISTERHOOD and in this particular case the Forbidden zone was forbidden because of and Does anyone know of a comprehensive list of movies where there is an explicitly named Forbidden Zone? Also note: Watch The Sisterhood. It's really fun. Yes, there's a lot of "We have no money so drive these shitty cars around in this rock quarry." But there's also a neat feminist (for 1988) plot and some fairly complicated (for a Mad Max ripoff) characters and that ice skating lady from FOR YOUR EYES ONLY who talks to a hawk. Plus witches, swords, grenade launchers, Robert Patrick's wife, a bad guy with a conscience who is driven by a somewhat sympathetic back story but is still pretty bad, 100s of Filipino extras pretending to be mercenaries, zombies, cultists, and various other factions, the guy from Automan: The Lady from Knight Rider, a tank (and other various military equipment rented from the Filipino army for $40/day), a great synth score, driving, horseback riding, more driving, rocks....lots and lots of rocks, one badass um...dune trike???? (I don't know motorcycle stuff), various other jalopy "war wagons", a Forbidden Zone, A Hall of the Sisterhood, A High Priestess, gratuitous boobs, the hunters becoming the hunted, a guy named "Lord Crack" (I think??? doing a Dennis Hopper impression), a dungeon full of sexy witches (which is really just a problem waiting to happen), literally a full platoon of the Filipino army in their uniforms moonlighting as Lord Crack's guys, a giant lady force ghost-ex-machina, and cetera. The baddies: The Goodies: A talking hawk: I give it: All hail, Lord Crack.
  3. I mean, if the rule book allows Air Bud to play, I bet it allows the St. Louis Terriers and the Buffalo Blues to sign whoever they want and declare the return of the Federal Leauge.
  4. Almost all the problems with Exorcist III would be solved by having a lead who wasn't so sluggish and phoning it in as George C. Scott was. I know he was a big name and the character he was playing wasn't exactly spry in the 1st movie. But if they didn't insist on keeping that personal connection in that character, they could have heightened the stakes so much just by having a little motion and emotion from their lead in the same way that the stationary villain in the first movie was counterbalanced by the whirlwind of energy from Ellen Burstyn.
  5. The fight choreography and stunt work in that final scene was astounding given that no one involved was a trained stunt person and they had like hours to film most of it. It makes you wonder how well even a Jackie Chan fight would look if he didn't have an army of personally trained brilliant athletes working with him and dozens to hundreds of takes for each single shot to make it work. It was legit one of the best things I've ever seen when you measure in the degree of difficulty.
  6. At this point I see the Vinegar syndrome sales as a twice yearly spiritual tithing. It's like once during Spring planting season and once during harvest season you have to cough up your sacrifice to appease the Grindhouse Gods so that the next season will be a fertile one. I just wish they would accept humans burned up in a big wicker statue of Lucio Fulci instead of just U.S. currency. It would be cheaper and easier to hide the evidence from my wife.
  7. i hate to tell all of you but Grindhouse Video is also running a really good sale on Blue Underground editions. They are very tempting because they have a lot of the 3 disc editions (1 blu for the movie, 1 for just special features, and 1 CD soundtrack) for $17-21). And I figure if I randomly found a CD of the soundtrack for Zombie or something like that at a store for like $10 I would pounce on it. So it's like I'm getting the actual movie and special features for like $7-$10. At least that's what I told myself when I blew up my paypal on them at the same time Vinegar Syndrome was going live.
  8. There's a few good things buried in there. Bird with the Crystal Plumage for $8. Blood & Black Lace on Bl for $5!! But much of the stuff is soul-deadening and there's a lot to look through. To make it worse a lot of this straight to dvd junk has amazing 70s or 80s looking cover art. The slugs are getting smart. Here's some of what i found that looked good (keeping in mind my odd standards) and at a good price if you want to cut through the bullshit: Blood and Black Lace Bird with the Crystal Plumage Black Shampoo Twilight People Funeral Home Night Visitor The Aftermath Sisters of Death/Scream Bloody Murder The Unnamable Nightwish The Leg Fighters Mommy/Mommy 2 25th anniversary Night of Bloody Horror Satan's Cheerleaders Even the Wind is Afraid The Skeleton of Mrs. Morales What the Peeper saw and if you want to watch Vanity make out with a tropical sasquatch: Tanya's Island
  9. But don’t we also always here that the best way to make Vince want to hire you back is to stand up for yourself, tell him to go fuck himself and that you don’t need him?
  10. This reminds me of the scene in every James Bond movie where the head of the evil people group is like “anyone who disagrees with this plan feel free to speak up now” and then that person is eaten by an octopus.
  11. I want to go bowling now only so I can drop the phrase “using house balls” over and over.
  12. Hollywood Observer: A lot of Oscar buzz surrounding James Franco putting on over 100 pounds to play White Pootie Tang. Some groups protest “do we need a white pootie tang?” Sony exec. Claps back “did we need a black one?” Director Lars von Trier insists “it will be culturally sensitive to the original material of which I am a huge fan.” Developing...
  13. Thanks for the heads up. They have a few old Jackie Chan movies. A Sam fuller. And a couple of giallo that no one else has put out.
  14. Dead-End Drive-In is a legitimately great and smart movie.
  15. Ronda is shady in all sorts of ways but it does my heart good to see that it takes someone who has the money to not need to suck up to them mere weeks of being around WWE fans to want to say "FUCK WWE FANS" into every microphone they get near. It confirms that there are a few shreds of rational coding still at work in this crappy, failing simulation.
  16. Has Sam Bradford announced that he's out for the season with Coronavirus in his ankle or something yet?
  17. Based on the numbers is South Korea, anyone under the age of thirty basically swallows Coronaviruses like Kirby and then just spits them out at other people and bops happily along their way.
  18. Carry on? I'll be amazed if Vince doesn't send Tian Bing out to start coughing on people just for the heat.
  19. There is another channel that posts full episodes as they aired with all original commercials. I don't know why but it really gets me. I'm sure you can find it with the right search terms.
  20. There is no way that the sperm of ALan Hale could produce Genie Francis. And with that I'll just let you settle into the idea of "the sperm of Alan Hale."
  21. I was more bothered by the fat that one RKO and a chair to the back knocked him out cold for five minutes but at Mania he will kick out of six to ten of each. Ring rust?
  22. Guy who quit doing his Billy Ray Gyrates act at Dudes-A-Poppin' on artistic principal because straight women kept requesting Old Town Road. He's now rebranding as Cowboy Throb Orton.
  23. This stuff? Wouldn't bother me at all. Another year of 90% strikeouts and solo dingers is more than I can take though.
  24. Tony putting in a call to Hillary’s “Epstein guy.” (honestly she could have picked a better code name for him)
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