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Smackdown Spoilers for 1/9/15


Casey

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Just be glad that Hunico is working the Sin Cara gimmick now that Mistico is persona non grata. 

 

At least we know Dolph won't embarrass himself trying to use half of Mistico's aerial moveset.

 

Bad things could happen when Dolph tries to get his big ass in the air to hit a La Mistica or a Cristo.

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Rowan can come back under a Kane mask as Big Red Machine.

 

I hope they claim that he's under the mask but they have footage of him making wine.

 

I just want a promo with Dolph yelling "I know Sin Cara's cool, BECAUSE WE MET IN JAIL DADDY!"

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SUFFERING SUCCOTASH is the material written for Roman Reigns nothing but donkey dung. Fucker's doomed with that stuff, and that means the company's doomed too. At least we'll get more solid Usos tag title matches and...poor uses of Barrett. At least they've got strong pay per view numbers, okay, how about the Network...I'm not really bullish on the company's future right now. Dean as a Ricky Morton-style tag worker was shockingly great tonight.

 

http://www.imagebam.com/gallery/do36hmpvo222lga8ndqxkfjmps4y2auf

 

Screens -

 

0e23d2380342344.jpg

 

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ef7bf5380343658.jpg

 

c15952380347271.jpg

 

 

http://www.imagebam.com/gallery/do36hmpvo222lga8ndqxkfjmps4y2auf

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Since I have nothing to do on Friday nights but quaff Beast Ice and stare at the TV, here's your Smackdown Report for 1/9/15

 

^^^ what y'all said about Reigns

 

Miz seems to be getting super into the hand gestures just in an attempt to throw off Mizdow. 

 

Ha, I forgot about Big E falling on Rose after getting jumped by Cesaro. I'd wear Cesaro's shirt. Tyson's... no. "Fact Dropper"? What the fuck is that? 

 

The fake Total Elimination looks a little better than the Ascension's fake gimmick feels. But not by much. 

 

I know it's Cody's job to act weird, but how does pulling an Uso's shirt up and down in the corner help him in any way? His scream and the goofy backwards plancha followed by his joy over Mizdow taking the stunt bump was hilarious though. God is he having fun, crotch-chopping and hiss-spitting at the crowd. Him and Mizdow (who actually got some offense) made this interesting. 

 

Did they give Sin Cara the win because they were near the border? Is that any more dumb and shitty than them doing it in, say, Salt Lake City? No point whatsoever, and it looked terrible having Barrett take soft, loose lucha moves when everyone knows he could and should have easily eaten Cara alive in an equally brief and very stiff fashion. I know they only think the belts are props but fuck. Heath Slater could have kicked out of that Swanton Bomb, and the very nice Bull Hammer after wasn't enough to assuage that feeling.

 

I told y'all that Dean is the Teflon Don. The heat for him coming back wasn't as big as it should have been, but it was good enough. Big Show's ad libs are great and the whole B-team Authority are a great pack of sleazy, cheating heels. It was really good seeing the Shield all in one match again and though it was a small match in the scheme of things, it was really, really fun and had a solid finale. Good deal. 

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Barrett jobs to a jobber like the jobber that he is. Ha! What a joke. They really should have just let him go baby-face on his return and stay that way. See Cesaro.

 

Ambrose, meanwhile, looked spectacular in the main event. People worried about him being "dead"? HE'S INDESTRUCTIBLE.

 

I still think Reigns will be fine as long as the audience doesn't rebel too much on him (and WWE doesn't make him say TOO many terrible things).

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Reigns looked great in the main event tag. Probably because they saved him for the hot tag and only let him hit his cool looking stuff. This is how he should be used til he's ready.

I don't know what to make of the Barrett loss other than WWE realizing that they just "fired" a nice chunk of the faces of a shallow roster. It's sin cara time.

Adam Rose should not be delivering a spine buster to Big E, let alone one 20 seconds into the match.

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The main was fun. Dean has been a terrific face in peril ever since the Shield turned face. Dean as Ricky Morton and Reigns as the house of fire works really well, but they need for Reigns to be able to do more than that at this point.

 

The thing that stood out to me is how Ambrose and Rollins now have individual characters they've developed since the Shield split, and Reigns is still kinda the Shield guy. It's like high school is over man stop wearing your varsity jacket.

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Only saw the highlights on Youtube, but Reigns and Ambrose looked like stars. Ambrose needs to do something with his goofy ass hair though.

I was watching highlights on youtube too. Dean Ambrose the lunatic fringe should not be cutting friendly down to earth promos telling us to click on the bouncing logo above his head to see more exciting Smackdown action.

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I am still on my "WADE MOTHERFUCKIN' BARRETT IS BACK!!" high to care that he jobbed on SD tbh.

 

 

I was more concerned to realize that Alicia chooses to land flatly on her ass instead of taking a back bump everytime. Does she not want to walk when she hits 30?

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I was honestly hoping that suffereing succotash line was something Roman's daughter wrote for him.  The recognition of the stupidity of it all and the wink led me to believe that.  Then I read it was Vince who wrote that and I just got sad.  Holy fuck how can he say he's not out of touch with stuff like that?  I know he's not going to leave anytime soon, but he really should just step aside.  I'm not a fan at all of the "Roman is a cool guy, let's make him talk more and sound lame" idea.  That said, cool to see Roman/Dean together again.  If they don't do it often it's always nice to see.  I still am waiting for that Network special where they follow them around while they drink at bars until close.  That might be awesome.  Stone Cold still wants to have that beer with Roman, so put them together and you have magic.

 

And unless they're going to push Sin Cara, that match was a joke.

 

NXT and NJPW are now palate cleansers for having to watch WWE.

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