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Nothing worse than a rat than can't keep things on the down low.

The most implausible thing about Curt's dream was Paul Heyman giving someone money.

Carmelo and Rondo slowly eating Derek Fischer's soul seems like destiny.

Not from our hearts. Never from our hearts.

Would it be wrong to get the date of Alex Riley's future-endeavoring tattooed on my neck?

Wrong.

http://globalforcewrestling.com/roster/ Here's the updated version: DATABASE_ERROR_ REBOOTING_

Oldie and a goodie:

Great one-two post punch... or the GREATEST one-two post punch?

Looking at Dolfan's post makes me wonder if Kevin Owens is the grown-up, hostile version of Gene Belcher, like something snapped after puberty hit?

Yo.

"Who's better than Kanyon Mortis?"

Yes.

Handsome? Check. Brave? Check. Strong? Check.

What sin could have Derek Fisher committed to deserve such a fate? Him using his daughters health to worm his way out of losing(or non title contenders, not always the same thing), to get back to the Lakers or other title contenders, on MULTIPLE occasions, comes to mind. . . .

Whitey Bulger is a pretty creepy, weird guy.

Of course you do, dear.

Pansy. I dive into those and kick the shit out of all three.

Kevin Owens is who Tina Belcher is going to be when she grows up, not Gene. Gene's just odd. Tina's the budding violent sociopath in the family.

Well, you see, several things: 1. You gotta admit, the quality of competition in Freemode has gone down considerably. You occasionally find someone who can go, but more often than not, the other people playing are dipshits. 2. I actually used to care about getting killed and getting my ass kicked. I have only recently developed a significant amount of "fuck it," or "let's see how this goes." For example, I join a room last night and there's lots of shit-talking going on. I scope out what's happening and there's six super-red dots in a huge scrap at the beach to the right of the pier. I put some stickies on the car and head down there. I drive on to the beach and Allah Akbar the shit out of one of them. I hear "there's somebody new, he's fucked now." I think "now, not so fast fellas," but here's something I didn't know: There were six dudes down there. Three were working together. Three were not. The three who were not vanished into thin air, leaving me with three dudes working together on the beach. I scrambled and fared semi-decently, but I knew my time was drawing nigh. So I saw a parachute race close by and got the hell out of there. I would've never gotten into that situation a few months ago. I used to avoid scrums like the plague and cuss Robert when he went diving into one. Now I'm like "screw it, what's the worst that can happen? I get killed a bunch and quit." I hate going out like that, but damn, it was 3-on-1 on the beach. I'd never do that to someone, shit, it was unfair. Who cares if someone shoots me for my bounty? Screw it. I like the idea that someone in an XBox party is saying "this crazy fucker's got a bounty and he's coming right at us?"

I think I've posted something similar once before, but I still laugh every time you write about being a solo dickhead in freemode because of this one from back in the day. Especially relevant parts in bold: Now I know why you prefer cats. You like to have one in your lap to pet like Blofeld when you're laughing maniacally at poor suckers and their blown up cars. This scene was actually inspired by Stout in freemode:

I threw an Army guy out of a jet a couple of days ago during Blind Eye and nothing happened, but I guess that's because I didn't kill him. I love turning on the Blind Eye thing during the Destroy 20 Vehicles challenge and then just standing in a busy intersection blowing stuff up. I wanted to get the objectives over with the other night, and one of them was Steal 20 Vehicles, so I turned on Blind Eye, found a parking lot and would steal one car, drive it over to another, steal it, drive it over to another, steal it, etc. I tried to Allah Akbar a dude last night, but he had just gotten out of his car and was in passive. So I blew up his car, but not him. He sent me a message that said "you can't troll a troll." I thought "well, we'll see about that." He was pretty good about getting on walls, so running him over was out of the question. Plus I was scared he'd pop out of passive. He called for his car again and I proximity mined it right in front of him. A car passing by blew it up. I kept trying to stay near him to get him shot by the cops. He called for his Adder, so I blew it up too, with him in passive on top of it. I'm getting my third strike. I kept thinking "why am I doing this?" I have a problem. I need help. My name's John, and I like to blow up people's cars. Finally I discovered why he was in passive - he was waiting on a buddy of his, who arrived on the scene and we started scrapping. They took off toward the 'Hood with me and Flash in Hot Pursuit. I get near them and they've got me pinned in. Damn! I'm in a tight spot! Then it hit me: "It would be funny as fuck if I went into passive." So I did and got up on top of a house and sent the one guy a message that said "troll." I thought they were gonna go get helicopters from the hospital and try to decrapitate me. I was then going to come out of passive, shoot them down, and leave just to be a complete dick, but they didn't go get choppers, so I just left.

I liked when Michelle Obama's whole thing was "Hey, kids should eat healthy and have carrots and apples and stuff." Surely the most mild, inoffensive First Lady project in the history of mild, inoffensive First Lady projects. And still got crapped on for it. So they made her stop doing it.

and no CGI. Good old-fashioned "mannequin in a helmet" technology!

Jose Bautista got thrown at last night by the Orioles. Instead of turning it into a beanball war, he launched a homer. That's how it should be taken care of.

BONUS:

If he did that, no wonder he got thrown at. 3rd time they have thrown at him already this year. If it were me I would have walked the bases backwards making engine revving sounds

Plus another big thing with Wright in SMW is that families were watching this stuff, grandparents, parents, kids, and I guarantee you the older folks were like "he was a sumbitch way back when! Your grandpa once helped burn down his plane!"

Ron Wright was wrassling.

It's actually Joe's twin, Samoa Moe.

"It's so soft..." "DAMMIT IT'S AN UPPER BODY BIDNESS!"

First time I saw that I popped so hard. That might be my favorite Arn spinebuster ever. My favourite remains the one at Wargames 92 when he enters the cage like a terminator - kills Windham with a DDT then hits the most crisp spinebuster ever seen on Steamboat to give the Dangerous Alliance the upperhand again Mine:

There you go.

The wrestling promotion that gravity forgot.

I haven't watched a ton of Smoky Mountain, but if he was the Ray of Smoky Mountain that's just the limit.

dude 4/20 was yesterday

Curt McGirt's got him some of the good ass drugs.

Correct. Doesn't matter though. TNA won't book them properly. They'll be jobbing to Cannibal Hillbilly and the Mothman by this time next month. At this rate, TNA should go all in with the Destination America connection and have nothing but monsters, cryptids, hillbillies and ghosts battling it out. Fuck, give Violent J the book.

These Hogan jokes are terrible.

This is an obvious one.

I'll always love Elektra deciding to fight a blind man at the playground

I was a little disappointed that All of the acting has been great so far. I can't really think of a weak link. Even the little side characters like Madame Gao or Matt's Dad or whoever.. Stick.. I mean everyone has been awesome.