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Stolen from Rick Knox.

Is Venus Van Damme what Todd Chrisley would be if he embraced who he truly is?

Why? Deep Impact had a much smarter script, better acting, and was just all-around a more elegant piece of filmmaking. The cast wasn't quite so much an unbelievable Who's-Who as Armageddon boasted, admittedly, but DI was still working with a pretty deep bench of talent: on the IMDB cast list, you gotta go like thirty names down before you hit Kurtwood Smith and Denise Crosby in tiny parts. And it was 31 minutes shorter, too (I have no idea why Michael Bay keeps insisting on these punishingly long running times for all his movies). It had less action than Armageddon, yeah, but that movie's action was so bombastic and shaky-cam and strobe-light-edited that it was nearly unwatchable. I'm getting tired of constantly repeating "it's okay if you disagree with me, just please put a little effort into explaining the reasons behind your dissenting opinions" only to have people keep dropping their "you're wrong, Movie X sucked" bombs. Keep that shit on Twitter where it belongs. Why do you come to a communication forum which is capable of wonderfully in-depth discussion and then actively avoid saying anything but the briefest summary of your opinion? Because.

To be fair, there's still debate that the other team didn't remember there was a game that day.

Whomever brought the 'Famine her right in the Potato' sign to Gameday this morning is clearly one of the best and brightest of his generation.

I think this will be another year in which the result overshadows the match. One of my favorite matches this year was the MITB tile match qualifying match between Barrett and Sheamus. No one talked about what a brutal fucking match it was. It started off as normal Sheamus vs Barrett match.. So so many good things happened after the mid match break: Wade counters pretty much all of Sheamus's moves sans the final Brogue Kick. And all the counters were just fucking kicks to the mush or headbutts. Love love Wade countering the shoulder block spot by head butting Sheamus to hell. This was one of the few matches were the guys stopping and staring at the hanging thing meant something. Not that "I am gonna win that." Look everyone does, but more of a "what the fuck was I thinking? This asshole is going to kill me for that." Look and it was awesome. Wade clearly lost because the ref had to pull him off of Sheamus. Sheamus may be a terrible character, but damnit to hell can he work a 10 count and hit a Brogue Kick like his life depends on it. He didn't pander to the crowd, he kicked the shit out of Wade out of desperation. More important, the way he fell on top of Wade as he kicked him was totally lucky and positioned him to pin Wade. Best of all, Sheamus actually takes the time after the match to SELL that he barely won the damn match. Faces don't do that much anymore, and Sheamus rarely, rarely does it. Barrett has gotten so fucking good at such a fast rate... And Sheamus is really good at being a fucking baby face when he is in there with a guy who matches up with him so well.

oh hey! that's me standing against the wall! i made it into a gif! I MADE IT INTO A GIF Your bored clapping reaction is pretty weak. "Eh, he could have kicked him harder, but I guess the effort was okay."

Kobe marks are weird dudes.

We're gonna get a damn Orton Main Event push now because of this meme now. I blame the internet. It's our own damn fault this time.

Fixed it for ya

They could also use: -Maria -Daffney -Traci Brooks -Linda McMahon -The 1989 Denver Broncos -Missy Hyatt -Mae Young's corpse

"The Eskimo Sisters"

3D Dot Heroes and Valkyria Chronicles. Exclusive and good.

I have a cousin who's a crazy, Born Again/ Ex Drugged out Hippie turned Jesus Freak in the Mid-Seventies, guy. He's a lot older than me and lived in Kentucky so we were never close. We'd see each other on Christmas when I was a kid and he was in his early twenties. I'd hear stories from relatives about how "he's nuts!", but I never thought about it. One day when I was around 22 I came home from work and there was this thick letter in the mail from him. I hadn't seen him in years. I open it up and it starts real nice, all "How are you? I hear your doing well at work" then it started getting Bible quotey. Then REALLY Bible Quotey. Then nothing but scripture about how I was going to hell if I didn't give myself to Christ, written in what I remember was red ink. I got about 5 pages into this terror that was about 22 pages long two sided. It freaked me the fuck out. I called my Dad and told him I got this fucked up letter from my cousin. He laughed and said, "Ah, you finally got YOUR Crazy Brian letter!" and laughed louder. So, I'd just take that stuff and just accept the good part, put aside the weird stuff. It's not THAT bad.

Only if he plays some piano and dances too before leaving.

I'm on record as despising films such as Saw or Human Centipede so I'm pretty sure my feelings here are clear, at least. I'm all for freedom of expression and if they can find someone to publish and distribute their hate simulator then bully for them, but luckily that freedom of expression also includes my right to hate your work and/or disparage it at will.

Am officially an owner of a PS3 FUCK MICROSOFT!!!! Isn't that what I am supposed to say now?

I 99% sure he falls because he steps on his lineman's foot - not that he was diving. But hey - it's Brady and the Pats - EVERYTHING MUST BE AN OUTRAGE!!!

6 year old lost a tooth defending a rear naked choke in BJJ class. She spit it out, showed it to coach and wanted to continue sparring. At least it was the loose one.

If I learned anything from Konnan's pre-match spiels in WCW it means that they think he's gay.

It IS totally over the top, but it's worth mentioning the segments that spoof Nancy Grace actually underplay how nuts and self-righteous she is.

If Jim Ross wanted to get back in the wrestling business, he'd be working in the wrestling business.

Sounds like Maddox is in DGAF mode. Hopefully he'll get picked up by PWG, dude has a ton of potential.

Harvin is such a dick that he cut in front of the "punch Tate in the face" line. I read that as Harvin is such a dick that he cut in front of the "punch Tabe in the face" line and was insanely confused. Tabe is a nice guy!

This has been a huge beef of mine as well. What if the NWA made Beautiful Bobby go out on commentary by himself and then had Jim Ross make fun of him for talking like he had a mouthful of crackers (tm Bobby Heenan)? Instead they took a guy who could work but not talk and gave him awesome tag-team partners and one of the best talkers of all-time as a manger and bam, money. I just don't get the point of tearing down a guy on-camera and then trying to trot him out there the following week and expecting him to get over.

That wouldn't have been a controversial opinion around these parts. I still love Face/Off though. It's stupid as hell but it's a damn fine piece of action.

Fresh I have a proposition for you- donate your PS4 to someone on this board that will play it. That poor little square of plastic sits there day after day feeling unloved and wondering if YouTube will be the only thing it's ever used for.

Two teams in the sport that doesn't do the trade thing, have traded this guy in years that are theoretically his physical prime. That has to say something. The black eye he gave Golden Tate says something too.

I'm shipping Clemma like a motherfucker.

Only if he plays some piano and dances too before leaving. I still maintain that emo-jazz Peter was the best, not worst, part of Spider-Man 3.

Jump on the Ratchet games if you like shooty platformers. They're all well done (well, except for All-4-One) and often have a really hilariously bleak sense of humor.

I don't mind Seattle sabotaging their offense. Also, I hate the Pats because if you live around here... fucking hell, you'd understand, believe me. There were very few Pats fans pre-2001. Very few. Now all you see is these loud and obnoxious fuckers.

I'd still rather have Miles played by Donald Glover than that crap anyway.

Most egregious flop last night was by a Jet, and got New England a 15 yard penalty. It was so bad somewhere Ronaldo rolled his eyes. This gimmick where a lot of you hate teams for not being awful is incredibly tiresome.

That should have been done, with Cole wearing a neckbrace for the next six months as a result.

It would have worked better if Diesel's gimmick was that he suffered from some type of mental disorder and actually thought he was a truck.

That's what happens when you take his Big Red Stapler.

The fact that Cole never ate one from Lawler was a disgrace.

Okay, instead of dialing back to Frankenstein or Poe, I'm going to start and the end of the 1890s, using The Lost Stradivarius by John Meade Falkner as our first "modern horror" novel. This was 1895, two years before Dracula. I just re-read this a year or so back and it holds up wonderfully well. 1897: Dracula - Bram Stoker (There are reasons why this book was a smash hit for thirty years before anyone had heard of Bela Lugosi.) 1898: The Beetle - Richard Marsh (The yin to Stoker's yang. Fast-paced to the point of leaving the reader gasping for breath.) Where Dracula is slow-moving and atmospheric, The Beetle is manic chaos and a great deal of fun. There are tons of cheap reprints out there. Buy one! 1907 - The Sorcerer's Apprentice - Hanns Heinz Ewers (The Frank Braun Trilogy spans four decades, so I wasn't entirely sure where to put it as it is basically one story broken into three books). Anyway, this is where it begins, if this one doesn't do it for you, don't bother with the sequels. On the other hand, if you like this, you'll want to read the rest of the story immediately. 1907-1912: The Boats of the Glen Carrig, The Ghost Pirates, The Night Land and The House on the Borderland - all by William Hope Hodgson. Included in this group of four you have H.P. Lovecraft's favorite novel (House) and Caitlin R. Kiernan and John Pelan's favorite novel (The Night Land) and there's a bunch of folk who would call The Ghost Pirates the best supernatural horror novel ever written. The Boats of the Glen Carrig is sort of the Jun Akiyama of the group, and that's not really a bad thing. The phrase "cosmic terror" begins (and some would say ends) with The Night Land. The highly stylized language might grate on modern readers a bit, in which case James Stoddard (he of The High House and The False House fame) has done a masterful retelling of the tale in more modern prose. There are also a lot of people who would side with Lovecraft and proclaim The House on the Borderland to be the better book. It's much, much shorter and more accessible, so if you haven't read Hodgson at all, that might be the place to start. He was also a hell of a short story writer. Okay, we had this nasty thing called WWI interrupt everything for a few years... When we return, it's the Roaring Twenties! 1925 - Invaders from the Dark - Greya La Spina (Until the publication of Tessier's The Night Walker some fifty years later this was the gold standard of lycanthropy novels. 1926 - Fettered - Greya La Spina (Sadly, this appeared as a serial in Weird Tales and has never been reprinted. I'm fixing to do something about that in the very near future.) 1925-1928 The Werewolf of Ponkert, The Return of the Master, The Werewolf's Daughter (All three ran in Weird Tales, later all three were published in book form by Donald M. Grant). Only the first novel has been published in paperback. An excellent period piece, but didn't get to shine very long with La Spina's novel appearing the same year. 1927 - The Devil of Pei-Ling - Herbert Asbury (Yep, it's the Gangs of New York guy. Before he started writing more-or-less true crime stuff, Asbury wrote this amazing novel of Asian menace with huge rats and toads, bloody ropes dripping from the ceiling, etc. etc. Recently reprinted and an absolute blast. 1927 - The Dark Chamber - Leonard Cline (Pretty much Altered States sixty years earlier and better written.) 1929 - The Fire Spirits - Paul Busson (A period piece that seamlessly mixes fact and fiction to the point where you're left wondering whether this was fiction or not. Absolutely chilling for that reason.) Sort of a summary, marketing categories were much broader then, all of these and many more disparate books were simply called "thrillers". A "thriller" could be a non-supernatural horror yarn, a police procedural, a supernatural or science fictional tale or any combination thereof. "Horror" was a reaction to something, not a marketing buzzword. We do see some real diversity, from the traditional (La Spina, Munn, Stoker) to the wildly experimental (Cline, Hodgson, Ewers). All in all this is just a hint of what's to come when the floodgates open in the 1930s. As I'm on a deadline, as much fun as this is, I'm going to have to rein it in until I'm done with the task at hand, probably have to pick this up tomorrow...

I like how he's this insane Special Final Boss where you have to use multiple methods of kung-fu and special strategies to knock him off. Gotta go for that top knot, son! Also the fact that he can RETRACT HIS GENITALIA to sucker in people who try and go for the nuts, trapping their leg and using it to beat on 'em.

The Lions were all but handed the division twice last year...

This is just funny https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KkQwkEu26R8