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OCT 2015 MOVIE DISCUSSION

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Mildly topical: You will never convince me that Michael J. Fox as Marty McFly is NOT one of the most charming and endearing acting performances of all time.

 

His charisma was off the frigging charts in that film. Few actors will ever get to approach it.

 

Like, seriously: If they'd stuck with Eric Stoltz, we would not still be talking about this movie.

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Watched American Sniper.

 

It was fucking terrible. Just a really boring and a massive blowjob for the memory of Chris Kyle, just none of the wacky shit he did. Fuck Clint Eastwood.

 

To borrow from Frankie Boyle: That film was "like watching Star Wars from the point of view of one of the Stormtroopers."

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Watched Jupiter Ascending.  It's really bad.  Like, the movie has the innate ability to forget scenes which just happened, for instance a scene where Mila Kunis is going to marry a bad guy by placing her hand on an iPad-like device that occurs in slow-motion while heroic Channing Tatum is trying to save her and not fifteen minutes later, she has to renounce her stuff by placing a hand on another iPad-like device that occurs in slow-motion while heroic Channing Tatum is trying to save her.  How did someone not realize that they're literally repeating scenes that JUST happened?!  The first 30-40 minutes aren't bad, honestly, with lots of exciting action sequences, but the movie grinds to a complete halt for the next 40-50 minutes as they try to explain things (And there is a senseless 4+ minute sequence that, in the words of Will Leitch "the Wachowskis decided to make some sort of point about intergalactic bureaucracy and governmental red tape" and is "honestly one of the most bewildering things I've ever seen in a movie").  And Eddie Redmayne?!  You'd swear that he didn't know how to act if you didn't have the knowledge of his having won an Academy Award!  He does this terrible affected accent that sounds basically like a 'Family Guy' parody of what a British royal would sound like.  It's just BAD.  Every minute he's on the screen is absolute torture for the viewer.  Plus, everything sounds or looks like it's cribbed from something else: the score sounds like 'Duel of the Fates' remixed; Channing Tatum flying his ship looks uncannily like the inside of the giant robots in 'Pacific Rim'; the sound effects sound like Transformers transforming; the outfits look like they're out of 'Dune'; Tatum's flying skates can't help but remind you of Dazzler; and, somehow, Mila Kunis screaming in an early chase sequence sounds EXACTLY like the sound R2D2 makes when he gets shot.  It's honestly staggeringly bad.

 

With every new Wachowski movie, it continues to be a wonder how The Matrix ended up as great as it was.

 

Like, were they on drugs for all of 1998 and had great editors?

 

Because, if so, you know, go back on the drugs and bring back the great editors, guys. 

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In retrospect, it's possible they just ripped off Dark City, though.

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Bound wasn't bad though. But somehow the success of the first Matrix movie made them rubbish forever (some people liked Speed Racer. I'm not one of them). Joel Silver's fault?

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In retrospect, it's possible they just ripped off Dark City, though.

 

I always heard they ripped off Grant Morrison's The Invisibles.

 

Not that I'd know, I can barely decipher Morrison's mainstream stuff like his X-Men run let alone his esoteric shit...

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Watched American Sniper.

 

It was fucking terrible. Just a really boring and a massive blowjob for the memory of Chris Kyle, just none of the wacky shit he did. Fuck Clint Eastwood.

 

To borrow from Frankie Boyle: That film was "like watching Star Wars from the point of view of one of the Stormtroopers."

 

 

Bullshit dude Stormtroopers wouldn't actually hit anyone

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Watched American Sniper.

It was fucking terrible. Just a really boring and a massive blowjob for the memory of Chris Kyle, just none of the wacky shit he did. Fuck Clint Eastwood.

To borrow from Frankie Boyle: That film was "like watching Star Wars from the point of view of one of the Stormtroopers."

Bullshit dude Stormtroopers wouldn't actually hit anyone

Mandoloran's/Republic Commando's written by Traviss then?

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I don't know because none of those prequel movies ever happened

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Watched Jupiter Ascending.  It's really bad.  Like, the movie has the innate ability to forget scenes which just happened, for instance a scene where Mila Kunis is going to marry a bad guy by placing her hand on an iPad-like device that occurs in slow-motion while heroic Channing Tatum is trying to save her and not fifteen minutes later, she has to renounce her stuff by placing a hand on another iPad-like device that occurs in slow-motion while heroic Channing Tatum is trying to save her.  How did someone not realize that they're literally repeating scenes that JUST happened?!  The first 30-40 minutes aren't bad, honestly, with lots of exciting action sequences, but the movie grinds to a complete halt for the next 40-50 minutes as they try to explain things (And there is a senseless 4+ minute sequence that, in the words of Will Leitch "the Wachowskis decided to make some sort of point about intergalactic bureaucracy and governmental red tape" and is "honestly one of the most bewildering things I've ever seen in a movie").  And Eddie Redmayne?!  You'd swear that he didn't know how to act if you didn't have the knowledge of his having won an Academy Award!  He does this terrible affected accent that sounds basically like a 'Family Guy' parody of what a British royal would sound like.  It's just BAD.  Every minute he's on the screen is absolute torture for the viewer.  Plus, everything sounds or looks like it's cribbed from something else: the score sounds like 'Duel of the Fates' remixed; Channing Tatum flying his ship looks uncannily like the inside of the giant robots in 'Pacific Rim'; the sound effects sound like Transformers transforming; the outfits look like they're out of 'Dune'; Tatum's flying skates can't help but remind you of Dazzler; and, somehow, Mila Kunis screaming in an early chase sequence sounds EXACTLY like the sound R2D2 makes when he gets shot.  It's honestly staggeringly bad.

 

Well, one thing Jupiter Ascending and I have in common is that when I was done watching it, I was luckily able to forget most of the scenes as well.  Jeez, what a terrible movie.  When even looking at Mila Kunis becomes boring, you know you've pulled off a dull mess of a movie. 

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So, what's the best Mila Kunis movie? Has she actually made any good ones?

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Black Swan?

 

Basically this, Forgetting Sarah Marshall, and Book Of Eli are what made her a hot commodity...she can act but she's made a lot of shit choices...

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Black Swan or Forgetting Sarah Marshall.

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I forgot she was in Black Swan. And Forgetting Sarah Marshall, she's clearly in the number 4 spot... maybe the key to have her be in a good movie is to make sure she's in it for less than 18 minutes?

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She's been in good movies but was she actually good in them? I wasn't exactly blown away by her acting skill in Forgetting Sarah Marshall and can't remember how good she was in Black Swan (which I didn't really like much, anyway).

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Black Swan was tough for her, because the movie was deliberately contrasting everything about her against the main character... played by Natalie Portman in perhaps the single greatest piece of work in her entire career. That's sorta like Zack Ryder being put in the Wrestlemania main event against Stone Cold; Ryder might look good, but he's not the one you're gonna be remembering later.

I remember her being generic-but-fine in Forgetting Sarah Marshall, she was playing an utterly thankless role of a fourth-billed "leading lady". She was basically the straight man in a cast of screwballs, and looked all the more boring because of it.

Her small role in Date Night was excellent, though. She was hilarious in a one-scene extended cameo as a hostile junkie. Could be fuel for the "she's better in small doses" theory, especially if you also consider the sheer number of Family Guy episodes that she's been really good in.

Bound wasn't bad though. But somehow the success of the first Matrix movie made them rubbish forever (some people liked Speed Racer. I'm not one of them). Joel Silver's fault?

They're living examples of Quentin Tarantino's increasingly-plausible theory that most directors get worse, not better, as they get older. Bound was a damn fine neo-noir, a tightly-wound thriller with strong characters and great acting. The Matrix was a damn fine explodey-dope shoot-em-up action flick which ripped off everything cyberpunk ever in order to fool uninitiated viewers into thinking it was really smart. Matrix Reloaded was two or three great action scenes surrounded by an ocean of padded-out talky nonsense. Matrix Revolutions was one or two halfway-decent action scenes surrounded by the worst bullshit in the world. Said bullshit was then extracted, concentrated, and spraypainted with an eye-gouging anti-rainbow of garish colors; this became Speed Racer. A horrified world rushed to decontaminate the site, but unfortunately the dried bullshit-encrusted towels which were used in the cleanup had somehow escaped their planned incineration; these towels bound together, achieved sentience, and the resulting crusty bullshitty-toweled monstrosity declared its name was Jupiter Ascending.
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I forgot she was in Black Swan. And Forgetting Sarah Marshall, she's clearly in the number 4 spot... maybe the key to have her be in a good movie is to make sure she's in it for less than 18 minutes?

I don't get how she's the #4 spot.  She has way more screentime than Kristen Bell whose character is not memorable at any point in the film.  I get that it's Jason Segel and Russell Brand's movie, but Kunis is the #3 person in the film.

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You may be right but I forgot she was even in it until it was mentioned in this thread and definitely remembered all of the stuff with Bell's character. Kunis' character was incredibly generic, Bell's was less so and had a way more memorable role.

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Kunis was in that one Mike Judge film and for the life of me I had to scrape the base of my brain to remember she was in it, that's how forgettable she was and she wass one of the leads!

 

James

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Friends With Benefits (or no Strings Attached) - the one with Kunis and Justin Timberlake - was better than it had any right to be

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Since we have some of the usual people posting in this thread (and my inquiry on this got buried in Star Wars debate from the September thread), who would be interested in doing a best of the mid-decade poll (2010 - 2014). I know Caley mentioned wanting to do this but did not want to have to run this. I think I am more than up for the challenge, and it could be a fun poll to run as we head into the best of 2015 stuff.

 

I have heard a few lists the last couple of months that has my head thinking about the subject. I think my #1 is currently cut and dry.

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