Leaderboard

Haku beats Haiku Meng's fro blows in winter's wind Poetry death grip?

Yup. That's about right.

Hey mods he just spoiled the PPV for me in a thread that you're not supposed to be giving spoilers in while the show is going on. Ban him.

For heaven's sake, I've never seen so many people be proud of being jaded, cynical fuckheads. And getting actively angry at people who still get some joy out of wrestling.

You guys don't know it, but this is actually an example of WWE getting ahead of the curve. Because I was going to leave Daniel Bryan out of March Madness.

Most important thing, IMO, is for everyone to immediately start saying HUH HUH WHAT DO YOU PAYOFF GUYS THINK NOW so that we can continue listening to your terrible opinions. Bryan not being in the Rumble was terrible. They may have saved it if they'd had a storyline reason for him to not be in that was addressed throughout the show. And even then, he should have won.

Dude that match was so great, the damn ring got a standing ovation after Kurt left.

Yeah, I love the "people may bitch and moan, but they'll still pay to see it" talking point. How many buys did Starrcade do last year?

Weirdly enough, Daniel Bryan jobbing clean to Bray Wyatt was the best-booked thing of the night.

Highlight of the night was Dean Ambrose being the Tessio of the Shield: "How do you know I don't got two numbers?????I got ALL THE NUMBERS!!!!!"

Now we find Junji Hirata and we kill him Seriously though, I like Daniel Bryan, but Rey has contributed more to wrestling than he ever will, suck my dick Pittsburgh

Actually I agree. It was about States' rights. The rights to own people.As soon as they say "states rights," you retort with "The right to do what?" 99% of them will usually stutter and muster out something about "not taking every order from the central government." The more intelligent ones have heard your retort before, and follow up with "economic sovereignty," with a smug look on their face. You stare them dead in the eyes and ask "economic sovereignty for WHO?" and still with that slight grin of contempt, go "property owners." Finally you end their mental gymnastics exhibition with "and what type of property was at the heart of this economic sovereignty?" At this point, they'll reveal their (obviously) true colors and just drop "niggers," or try to save final face with "ownership deeds." At this juncture, you can pursue further, questioning what the deeds entitled them to, but by now, they're too embarassed at being exposed as a bigot, and you're mad that this is 5 minutes of your life you'll never get back again. But you'll also feel good inside, because bigots need to be put in place.

HEY GUYS BATISTA'S COMING BACK WOOHOO! -- This board, 8 days ago.

Also, I can't believe no one else has commented on the fact that Batista was too blown up to celebrate his victory.

Rey hasn't gotten booed that badly since One Night Stand '05. For what it's worth, the Rumble was actually pretty good. The crowd made for mighty lolz during the Cena-Orton match. And if I hear a single bad thing about the JBL surprise, I will personally flood this thread with animal gifs until it becomes unloadable.

Ouch. On a separate note, few times have I been prouder to be from Pittsburgh than tonight.

I don't know that I've ever seen fans of anything -- a TV show, a sports team, a wrestling company, so vociferously tell that company what they want to see, and have that company just completely ignore it like WWE does with Daniel Bryan and the "WWE Universe". The crowd was amazing at the end. How do you have 16,000 people yelling that they want to see this guy, and you DON'T EVEN HAVE HIM IN THE FUCKING MATCH? By the way, for the "wait and see" crowd on where they go with Bryan -- newsflash: it's over. They told us he was a B player, he dropped the title, looked like an idiot every week, and five months later is curtain jurking the Royal Rumble and jobbing clean as fodder for John Cena's next feud. There's no magical light at the end of the tunnel.

There was one particular thing they really wanted to see. Like they were excited about it all day, all week, maybe more. I don't think they saw it. There's no way for anyone to know what exactly it was because it's not like they articulated it vocally over and over or anything. We're not mind-readers, people.

Well, despite being waaaay off topic that was the most interesting discussion in forever.

If Swagger made them they'd be full of weed

This was mentioned in the Rumble thread. It'll never get old.

Also, no Mr. Perfect??????

Weirdly enough, Daniel Bryan jobbing clean to Bray Wyatt was the best-booked thing of the night. It was a perfect set-up. Keeps Bray strong for the Cena feud. Gives Bryan odds to overcome when he wins the Rumble. Gives Bryan a built in first feud after mania, especially if he wins the belt. Then... BATISTA.

And another thing... RUSEV!

At this point, don't we have to consider the possibility that WWE sees Bryan as a slightly better, more over Zach Ryder?

It could have been worse. Punk could have won. Thank you, corporate Kane.

The music and announcers were definitely extra loud in the end to cover for the boos and chants from the crowd. From Mick Foley's Twitter: Mick Foley ‏@realmickfoley 4m Does @WWE actually hate their own audience? I've never been so disgusted with a PPV.

I am so looking forward to the "wait and see" crowd telling us what a stroke of brilliance tonight was. I really am.

Or die tryin'.

Wow. So Barrett just did to me what DiBiase would do to the kid dribbling the basketball. That's actually some decent internet heeling, that fucker. Barrett needs a Virgil now thanks to you. God knows Charles Wright's had worse gimmicks.

Oh come on if anyone is sucking a dick, it's Seth

Must have. How else would he know the guy's name?

Your God is stuffed in Henry's locker.

I saw the thread here Hoped that there would be Haku Leaving satisfied.

Err.. this thread shows you who doesn't follow Wade on Twitter. Haha

and now it's going to become a semantics thread, awesome.

I had it 3 rounds to 2 for Henderson, but I could see giving Josh 1, 2, and 4.

HUGE disappointment not seeing TAKA's elimination in the 2000 Rumble.

That TNA would hire Russo again is so funny that there's not even words. I've got nothing. It's so funny that the Benny Hill theme or a Booster Gold bwahaha gif wouldn't cover it. The shockmaster animated gif would not do it. There's nothing. No Picard headslap gifs. There is literally nothing that the internet can provide to fully manage it.

Ambrose totally reminds me of Nasty Ned Brady. King of jobbers. That's not a guy. You photo-morphed Corbin Bernsen, Louis C.K., and Walter White.

And they did nothing to stop it?!??!

All I really care about is the big Brodus vs. Tensai blow-off match.

My hate for the Seahawks aside, I like this..

Combined number of stares/points at the WrestleMania XXX sign: 13

Wade Barrett via hitting every one with his gavel.

John Cena. Cena wins the championships from Randy Orton. Cena then enters the Rumble #1, and he personally eliminates all 29 other wrestlers. Michael Cole wonders if that young underdog Cena will overcome these overwhelming odds.