Raw 5-12-14

[JRGoldman]

Adam Rose needs to become a PG version of the Godfather and start having people concede matches to him so they can get a pass on to the party bus. I think it would help to give the gimmick some reach. It would also keep him out of the ring because even on nxt the gimmick died a death when he wrestled.

While on the subject of NXT call ups, Bo Dallas debuting and telling the 'yes movement' that he will fill the void Bryan has left would probably be the best debut possible for the guy, and would instantly establish the character beyond the videos.

Alicia Fox was the best thing on Raw and the only person who got heel heat. It was awesome. Is it just me, or does Paige kind of look like she is smiling when she sells?

[piranesi]

Adam Rose needs to become a PG version of the Godfather and start having people concede matches to him so they can get a pass on to the party bus. I think it would help to give the gimmick some reach. It would also keep him out of the ring because even on nxt the gimmick died a death when he wrestled.

 

 

100% of the time the reaction will be:

 

"I'll pass on the bus full of sweaty crossdressing fat guys and furries and instead take a turn punching you in the face."

[hammerva]

Also don't forget the worst pipe bomb in the history of the WWE with Damien Sandow.   Besides NXT I have no idea where that is going

 

I also don't have a clue what they are doing with Natalya.  Is she going to be the next Molly Holly in that we are supposed to hate her because she means well.  

 

The future isn't looking bright for Big E if tonight is any clue.  Oh well we still have his instagram account

 

Roman Reigns might be the future in their eyes but I have yet to see him have a really quality singles match.   Against Batista he seemed lost and against Randy Orton he had his moments. 

[JRGoldman]

Adam Rose needs to become a PG version of the Godfather and start having people concede matches to him so they can get a pass on to the party bus. I think it would help to give the gimmick some reach. It would also keep him out of the ring because even on nxt the gimmick died a death when he wrestled.

100% of the time the reaction will be:

"I'll pass on the bus full of sweaty crossdressing fat guys and furries and instead take a turn punching you in the face."

I dunno dude, Batista collects lunch boxes. There has to be some furry overlap.

[Niners Fan in CT]

Dudes, Bryan got married and then his father passed away and now apparently he is injured..  The only thing I can really blame creative on is putting him with Kane but even then most of the top guys all end up feuding with Kane sooner or later and their match at Extreme Rules ended the show.

 

I don't think they are sabotaging him and a lot of what's happened is out of their control.

[Dolfan in NYC]

If there were ever a week Stephanie needed to get punched in the face, this was it.  God, why would you put Bella 2 with Daniel if you aren't going to have the super villain get some come uppance.  Especially now that the hero they've been building around is out for the next few months.

[victor]

It was okay just not that good. That Nattie Neidhart thing was awful, too soapy, they're trying to do more stuff like on E I guess.I thought Bryan's neck surgery thing was an excuse so he could go to on the European tour. Steph was about to strip him of the title before Kane brought him out. A way to get the title off of him without beating him.

[piranesi]

Stop trying to divide the board, Dolfan.  Obviously Brie is Bella 1.

[Antacular]

BUT WHY DOESN'T ADAM ROSE HAVE A TAGTEAM PARTNER NAMED SLICE????

[Niners Fan in CT]

I'm sick and tired of being the only Eva Marie fan on this board. The way she held up those numbers... she made it look effortless.

[jstout]

I'd turn the six-man tag match between Evolution and the Shield into a six-way for the title. That'd be some intrigue.

[bink_winkleman]

If there were ever a week Stephanie needed to get punched in the face, this was it. God, why would you put Bella 2 with Daniel if you aren't going to have the super villain get some come uppance. Especially now that the hero they've been building around is out for the next few months.

I thought Bryan was gonna be back in a few weeks. That's what the SHEETZ! say and the angle certainly looks that way. The whole "Steph was unable to strip the title" thing makes this seem like a really minor surgery.

[piranesi]

It was okay just not that good. That Nattie Neidhart thing was awful, too soapy, they're trying to do more stuff like on E I guess.I thought Bryan's neck surgery thing was an excuse so he could go to on the European tour. Steph was about to strip him of the title before Kane brought him out. A way to get the title off of him without beating him.

 

That along with the Fandango/Summer thing being staged for the reality show now brought into their storyline on the regular show and the work/shoot vortex that is starting to form around that show is terrifying me.

 

I can't tell the difference between reality show reality, reality show works, in-ring works, backstage shoots, in-ring works treated as reality show reality, reality show works playing into in-ring works, backstage shoots overlapping reality show reality, in-ring works used to bolster reality show works, and reality show reality used to bolster in-ring works.

 

Fuck us all.

[Johnny Sorrow]

If there were ever a week Stephanie needed to get punched in the face, this was it. God, why would you put Bella 2 with Daniel if you aren't going to have the super villain get some come uppance. Especially now that the hero they've been building around is out for the next few months.

WWE arranged their marriage ? Wow. And he's not out for a few months. It's a few weeks, apparently.

[mco543]

Brie isn't worth wasting Steph's comeuppance on. She's absolutely dreadful in her role and wouldn't be able to carry her part. That being said I have no idea who else can possibly do it so I guess Steph goes unscathed. For a married couple, Brie and Bryan have zero chemistry on screen and Brie can't emote or show concern for shit.

[piranesi]

How do you fuck up the camera angle to show Bryan pushing himself along with his leg?  There's like ONE BAD ANGLE out of roughly 359 other degrees worth of angles where you wouldn't have been able to see that.

[SLKerAaron]

I want to like Adam Rose, I really do! Michael Cole just won't allow it though.

 

Also after rewatching the first Rumble on the Network recently I think I would rather call Brie "Bella Red" and Nikki "Bella Pink". You know, because of the upgraded mammaries.

 

After that zinger, I wouldn't be confused if I woke up tomorrow banned from the board.

 

How do you fuck up the camera angle to show Bryan pushing himself along with his leg?  There's like ONE BAD ANGLE out of roughly 359 other degrees worth of angles where you wouldn't have been able to see that.

 

 

Also, this!

[cool arrow]

So basically what you're saying is:

 

Russo won.

[Overly Critical Man]

That Natty storyline is so ass-backwards. Somehow she's the badguy in all of this for having her heart in the right place and working really hard on giving Nikki that art piece. So she gets laughed at and made fun of for trying to be a good friend. Then Nikki acts like a bitch and pats her on the head for being mad that her so-called friend shits on her gift.

 

Moral of the story: Stomp on people's feelings when they give you a present you don't like.

 

Holy shit. 

[_MJ_]

You guys need to appreciate the slow burn leading toward the big Steph Vs. Brie match at SummerSlam.  Have they even touch each other yet? The money is in the details.

[piranesi]

That Natty storyline is so ass-backwards. Somehow she's the badguy in all of this for having her heart in the right place and working really hard on giving Nikki that art piece. So she gets laughed at and made fun of for trying to be a good friend. Then Nikki acts like a bitch and pats her on the head for being mad that her so-called friend shits on her gift.

 

Moral of the story: Stomp on people's feelings when they give you a present you don't like.

 

Holy shit. 

 

Or the moral might be: Don't be a whiny pity monster.  It brings out the worst in everyone.

[Overly Critical Man]

 

That Natty storyline is so ass-backwards. Somehow she's the badguy in all of this for having her heart in the right place and working really hard on giving Nikki that art piece. So she gets laughed at and made fun of for trying to be a good friend. Then Nikki acts like a bitch and pats her on the head for being mad that her so-called friend shits on her gift.

 

Moral of the story: Stomp on people's feelings when they give you a present you don't like.

 

Holy shit. 

 

Or the moral might be: Don't be a whiny pity monster.  It brings out the worst in everyone.

 

Come on, this is the WWE. It's obviously the moral that promotes bullying.

[CastleVania Rey]

So we're not going to mention the big news tonight.  News that will have a huge impact on everything we see going forward. 

 

 

 

We're all just going to pretend that we watched that promo and didn't all just find out that Dean Ambrose is one of those people who pronounces the "t" in the word "OfTen."

 OHMYGODSo adorable.  I bet he's also one of the people who pronounces the "th" in "clothes" as in "Those cloTHes are stading between me and your titties, Fandango."

Meanwhile Reigns doesn't pronounce the "l" in cowd or "t" concep or the "dual" in indivijuey.

 

Well, I pronounce the "t" in often because it has a "t" sound in it, you know, like oft and it's correct. Ambrose pronounces the word right too because he's a great man, no, the GREATEST man and I hope to be like him when I re-grow up.

 

Who said SHIELD wasn't dominating in this feud with Evolution again?

 

Alicia Fox was super great.

[Overly Critical Man]

You guys need to appreciate the slow burn leading toward the big Steph Vs. Brie match at SummerSlam.  Have they even touch each other yet? The money is in the details.

Brie shoved Steph tonight, while increasing her acting range to that of a second-grader pretending to be a background tree in a production of Little Red Riding Hood.

[DreamBroken]

I enjoyed a lot of this show, especially the first two hours. Crowd seemed pretty hot all night too. Loved seeing Rebecca Knox/Becky Lynch on Raw fronting the Exotic Express, she's always been awesome.. also noticed Chasity Taylor in there too. Following that was the highlight of the night with Paige vs Alicia, great stuff and great to see something finally done with Alicia.. hopefully her quitting on the App is storyline but I remember the Bellas and Eve exits being done similar where it was a wwe.com thing.

 

Thought the Usos looked great in the six man, fun match. Loved the superkicks breaking up Sister Abigail on Cena. the Total Divas match was weird, decent match but almost thought Natalya was going to randomly turn heel on everyone afterwards. Really liked the Sheamus matchups and thought Rybaxel looked good even in defeat. I think they will end up in a good spot after being a thrown together team at first. Glad to see Sheamus just continued on as usual with no sign of a turn or anything.. him and Cesaro should be another good one on Main Event.

 

Hopefully Bryan's not gone long, seems like they might keep the title on him if he won't be gone long. Third hour kinda went downhill with Fandango/Ziggler, Sandow, etc. Weird how Big E just got kicked straight back out by Rusev. Main event was cool.. liking all of the Evolution/Shield feud. Shield stand tall in the end again. Kept expecting some kind of stipulation to be added to the PPV rematch but not yet.