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Raw is Back in the LED Cave, 04/12/21


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12 minutes ago, Shartnado said:

Damn, that's telegraphing whether he's gonna hit or not, then! If that's the case. Also, if he's running and doesn't hear the choo-choo, he should automatically hit the brakes, because he's about miss or crash!

Maybe you play the sound of a railroad crossing closing no matter whether he hits it or not.

HOW IS THIS BRAINSTORMING BETTER THAN RAW ITSELF

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3 minutes ago, Sex Machine Gun said:

Maybe you play the sound of a railroad crossing closing no matter whether he hits it or not.

HOW IS THIS BRAINSTORMING BETTER THAN RAW ITSELF

Maybe because our souls aren't dead...quite just yet?

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Money promo from Charlotte. That had a fantastic motivation for her appearance and later actions. It was nowhere on the same page as The Rock’s legendary promo in Toronto (maybe my favorite promo of all-time), but it was very strong in informing the audience of why she returned in this form, made excuses for not being on WrestleMania, references the smark criticisms of her “stealing opportunities” and announced she was the best, and then attacked when her rivals were spent from their match and vulnerable. Perfect heeling.

I will never understand at all why people hate on Charlotte. She rules so incredibly much. I like to compare the Horsewomen to the Novak/Federer/Nadal tennis rivalry in that all four have a great claim to make as the GOAT. 

1) Sasha has the throne right now. She was the second best performer of the FY 2021 (WrestleMania to WrestleMania) after Roman. She and Bayley carried the promotion during the pandemic, which threw off everything. Then she ended her year in the best match of WM weekend with Bianca Belair — gifted, but still relatively green and in her first big match in front of one of the biggest crowds post-COVID in any form of entertainment. 

2) Charlotte is my number two. She has had as many classic matches as anyone on the entire roster since she arrived. I think she’s had a lot of really iconic moments — jumping off the table with her crazy reckless dive before getting wrapped in the Banks Statement between the railing in the classic Last Man Standing against Sasha against Raw, kicking through a car window when brawling with Becky and Rousey, etc. She is an athletic marvel and has become a fantastic heel promo. She co-headlined WrestleMania. Her only downside is that she’s a pretty bad face. 

3) Bayley. She is the least athletic of the four but the best at performing as her character. She was the best babyface of her generation on NXT and was a great anchor as a face in the big roster for a long time. She eventually found her voice as a heel and has been lights out. There is no way anyone would have thought that she would be this great as a villain but it makes sense since she is just so incredibly gifted at understanding storytelling.

4) Becky Lynch. Becky was the biggest star since Daniel Bryan for a stretch and somehow is my fourth. She went from being a sort of afterthought of the four who had really good matches that established others as stars (Alexa Bliss) who was an overlooked good promo to finding her truth as a defiant badass. Her best moment was standing tall after having her face (!) broken at the end of that Raw she hijacked was one of the best moments ever in wrestling history — up there with Bryan on top of the cage during The Yes Movement!, Foley winning the title, 1-2-3 Kid beating Razor and so many things I am forgetting. The only reason she is fourth on my list is because she sat out to have a kid and that she didn’t get as strong a push as the other three did, which was not her fault. But when she finally did get that push, she became the biggest star in wrestling — and as over as anyone ever — who was the face of a historic WrestleMania main event. 

We really have been blessed to have these four and see them take the worst part of wrestling (the ridiculously dumb Divas) to possibly the best part of the show. And that is also not even counting the fantastic Asuka (maybe this should be a Top 5, it she is a clear fifth) and Alexa (not a great wrestler but as good as anyone at playing a character) and Shayna and the criminally underused Riot Squad and The Iiconics (best temper tantrums ever) and Nikki Cross, with Bianca and Rhea and everyone on NXT in the wings. 
 

 

 

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This seems fitting for that RAW. Just rambling chaos.

6 long minutes including the last minute being New Day paying tribute to DMX

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Rhea Ripley gets a crowning title win at the PPV, so of course CHHHarlotte returns and takes the title from her immediately. Classic.

 

I would feel blessed if the most over-pushed and over-protected worker in the WWE for the last decade was capable of putting someone else over for once.

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5 hours ago, Greggulator said:

Money promo from Charlotte. That had a fantastic motivation for her appearance and later actions. It was nowhere on the same page as The Rock’s legendary promo in Toronto (maybe my favorite promo of all-time), but it was very strong in informing the audience of why she returned in this form, made excuses for not being on WrestleMania, references the smark criticisms of her “stealing opportunities” and announced she was the best, and then attacked when her rivals were spent from their match and vulnerable. Perfect heeling.

I will never understand at all why people hate on Charlotte. She rules so incredibly much. I like to compare the Horsewomen to the Novak/Federer/Nadal tennis rivalry in that all four have a great claim to make as the GOAT. 

1) Sasha has the throne right now. She was the second best performer of the FY 2021 (WrestleMania to WrestleMania) after Roman. She and Bayley carried the promotion during the pandemic, which threw off everything. Then she ended her year in the best match of WM weekend with Bianca Belair — gifted, but still relatively green and in her first big match in front of one of the biggest crowds post-COVID in any form of entertainment. 

2) Charlotte is my number two. She has had as many classic matches as anyone on the entire roster since she arrived. I think she’s had a lot of really iconic moments — jumping off the table with her crazy reckless dive before getting wrapped in the Banks Statement between the railing in the classic Last Man Standing against Sasha against Raw, kicking through a car window when brawling with Becky and Rousey, etc. She is an athletic marvel and has become a fantastic heel promo. She co-headlined WrestleMania. Her only downside is that she’s a pretty bad face. 

3) Bayley. She is the least athletic of the four but the best at performing as her character. She was the best babyface of her generation on NXT and was a great anchor as a face in the big roster for a long time. She eventually found her voice as a heel and has been lights out. There is no way anyone would have thought that she would be this great as a villain but it makes sense since she is just so incredibly gifted at understanding storytelling.

4) Becky Lynch. Becky was the biggest star since Daniel Bryan for a stretch and somehow is my fourth. She went from being a sort of afterthought of the four who had really good matches that established others as stars (Alexa Bliss) who was an overlooked good promo to finding her truth as a defiant badass. Her best moment was standing tall after having her face (!) broken at the end of that Raw she hijacked was one of the best moments ever in wrestling history — up there with Bryan on top of the cage during The Yes Movement!, Foley winning the title, 1-2-3 Kid beating Razor and so many things I am forgetting. The only reason she is fourth on my list is because she sat out to have a kid and that she didn’t get as strong a push as the other three did, which was not her fault. But when she finally did get that push, she became the biggest star in wrestling — and as over as anyone ever — who was the face of a historic WrestleMania main event. 

 

We really have been blessed to have these four and see them take the worst part of wrestling (the ridiculously dumb Divas) to possibly the best part of the show. And that is also not even counting the fantastic Asuka (maybe this should be a Top 5, it she is a clear fifth) and Alexa (not a great wrestler but as good as anyone at playing a character) and Shayna and the criminally underused Riot Squad and The Iiconics (best temper tantrums ever) and Nikki Cross, with Bianca and Rhea and everyone on NXT in the wings. 
 

 

 

It's the Roman Reigns "forced coronation." She's been shoehorned into almost every important women's angle since the revolution began. Her presence stunts the growth of the entire division, and for me personally, it feels like its been the exact same shit since the day she debuted. Zero character growth or tweaks. I also didn't think the promo was all that great. She still has that "I'm trying to project authority that I absolutely don't have" tone. 

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The only problem with Roman's "forced coronations" is that they kept the big belts off him for so long after his wellness policy suspension. 

Charlotte's "forced coronations" have been much better. She probably should have won at WrestleMania 33. 

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As one of the seemingly few Bray Wyatt fans on here, he really should ask for his release.  They've butchered everything he's gotten over and any idea he has is neutered.  He deserves so much better than this epic shitshow.

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3 hours ago, killsteve said:

 CHHHarlotte

I'm pronouncing this as "Ch-ch-ch-charlotte", like the old Chia Pet commercials ("Ch-ch-ch-chia!"), and I'm glad this came into my life.

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31 minutes ago, StuntmanCrowley said:

As one of the seemingly few Bray Wyatt fans on here, he really should ask for his release.  They've butchered everything he's gotten over and any idea he has is neutered.  He deserves so much better than this epic shitshow.

I said this in the Mania thread and it’s absolutely true. Asuka too.

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40 minutes ago, StuntmanCrowley said:

As one of the seemingly few Bray Wyatt fans on here, he really should ask for his release.  They've butchered everything he's gotten over and any idea he has is neutered.  He deserves so much better than this epic shitshow.

Where would he go? Broken Matt flopped in AEW.

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22 minutes ago, Dog said:

Where would he go? Broken Matt flopped in AEW.

I was hoping maybe he could sell real estate or perhaps manage a chain restaurant. 

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42 minutes ago, nate said:

I'm pronouncing this as "Ch-ch-ch-charlotte", like the old Chia Pet commercials ("Ch-ch-ch-chia!"), and I'm glad this came into my life.

"Ch-ch-ch-ch-Charlotte turning face is strange ..."

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1 hour ago, Dog said:

Where would he go?

Does NXT Heart of THE SUN need a heel?

I feel like Bray would be ideal to anchor a promotion on the sun.  Surface temperature is only about 10,000 degrees Fahrenheit.  Bray would no sell that in a heartbeat.

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I tried watching Raw because I was pleasantly surprised by WM and I was nearly immediately put off by Matt Riddle challenging Bobby Lashley. Dude just got his head kicked off by Sheamus and now he's challenging Lashley? Uh, what?

Shelton and not-Shelton, welcome back to jobberville.

I thought the Charlotte promo was whatever and it definitely feels like Rhea won't be champ for long.

FFS, you bring out Dijak and Maddon and keep them in their shitty Retribution gimmicks. WHY?! The gimmicks look so freaking lame and their names suck. It would have been better to have them both come out in suits with the announcers losing it saying, "that's Dominick Dijakovic and Dio Maddon from NXT! We haven't seen them in months!"

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Raw ranked 1,2,3 top shows on cable again

Both first hours went above 2.0, numbers last seen in January of this year.

Spoiler

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6 hours ago, StuntmanCrowley said:

As one of the seemingly few Bray Wyatt fans on here, he really should ask for his release.  They've butchered everything he's gotten over and any idea he has is neutered.  He deserves so much better than this epic shitshow.

 

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