The Wall Street Journal Vince McMahon Thread.

[Stefanie Sparkleface]

14 minutes ago, Elsalvajeloco said:

...We had a wrestling garbageman. Why was there never a wrestling carpenter? Was Taker technically a carpenter since he handmade coffins? And why did it take him like three months to make one coffin? 

Wait...what was Hard Work Bobby Walker's occupation*? 

*Besides blowing high spots...

In fairness, it's hard to stick to making coffins when you have to go wrestle five nights a week. It's like that guy at my job who makes tables in his garage and it takes him like six months. He doesn't even do a custom paint job like when Undertaker had that thing that looked like it'd be on the side of a van like a bitchin' wizard. We're being a little unfair.

6 minutes ago, odessasteps said:

did Chikara ever have a Carpenter Ant? (Not counting Gulak) 

They did! He was a time traveler. (I am not kidding.)

[Elsalvajeloco]

5 minutes ago, Stefanie Sparkleface said:

In fairness, it's hard to stick to making coffins when you have to go wrestle five nights a week. It's like that guy at my job who makes tables in his garage and it takes him like six months. He doesn't even do a custom paint job like when Undertaker had that thing that looked like it'd be on the side of a van like a bitchin' wizard. We're being a little unfair.

They did! He was a time traveler. (I am not kidding.)

I feel like Taker is the one friend who begs you to let him make you something so he can get his "business" off the ground. And always overpromises and underdelivers.

"So yeah, is my coffin ready..."

"Oh shit dude, you needed it THIS week?!"

Also, can dead people take out SBA loans? I feel like that's a scam waiting to happen.

[Stefanie Sparkleface]

4 minutes ago, Elsalvajeloco said:

Also, can dead people take out SBA loans? I feel like that's a scam waiting to happen.

I'm not googling that. That's how I get on a list.

[Elsalvajeloco]

33 minutes ago, Stefanie Sparkleface said:

I'm not googling that. That's how I get on a list.

Damn, people find any reason not to support small businesses. One week it's "man, I dunno if I really have much use for an old timey coffin". The next week it's, "Didn't you try to embalm someone who was still among the living?" This man clearly needs money to pay for a staff. And real staff unlike the one he would have later on. I mean Gangrel is probably only good to make runs to Starbucks.

Honest, hard-working (dead) Americans can't catch a break.

[Curt McGirt]

1 hour ago, Stefanie Sparkleface said:

Look, I'm white, I'm not Counting Crows white.

I have a friend about a decade younger than me who just posted an Insta video of her getting down to a Counting Crows song. 

Jesus kids, there are way better things to take from the '90s, don't adopt what we suffered through. 

[odessasteps]

11 minutes ago, Elsalvajeloco said:

Damn, people find any reason not to support small businesses. One week it's "man, I dunno if I really have much use for an old timey coffin". The next week it's, "Didn't you try to embalm someone who was still among the living?" This man clearly needs money to pay for a staff. And real staff unlike the one he would have later on. I mean Gangrel is probably only good to make runs to Starbucks.

Honest, hard-working (dead) Americans can't catch a break.

I’m guessing Mideon and Viscera did a lot of the dirty work in that funeral parlor. 

[Elsalvajeloco]

By "dirty work", you mean walking up and down several aisles aimlessly at Home Depot and then hopping on a computer to watch hardcore pornography when they should be working? If so, that would be a yes.

[odessasteps]

1 minute ago, Elsalvajeloco said:

By "dirty work", you mean walking up and down several aisles aimlessly at Home Depot and then hopping on a computer to watch hardcore pornography when they should be working? If so, that would be a yes.

I figured Big Vis was the one scooping out the guts. It’s the name, after all. 

[Elsalvajeloco]

I mean sometimes you got to embellish a few things on the resume to get the job. 

[Peck]

Live look at this thread going off the rails:

[Curt McGirt]

We did the same thing with the Punk drama thread didn't we? 

Wanna make a Naked Mideon joke but I got nothing. I did just watch Dennis Knight in IWA Japan, however. He was not nude.

*crickets*

EDIT: I hate to say this and I may be cursing it all, but that was when the Punk thread ran out of steam. Let us hope this case doesn't do the same.

Edited April 25 by Curt McGirt

[zendragon]

9 hours ago, Raziel said:

Not gonna lie, "Flee to Antigua on the Sexy Bitch" might be one of the greatest things said on this board.

I swear Vince putting all his money in Swiss bank accounts and him, Bruce and Funkman attempting to avoid law enforcement by fleeing to the high seas L. Ron Hubbard style would be a hell of a coda to this sorid tale

[Raziel]

3 hours ago, zendragon said:

I swear Vince putting all his money in Swiss bank accounts and him, Bruce and Funkman attempting to avoid law enforcement by fleeing to the high seas L. Ron Hubbard style would be a hell of a coda to this sorid tale

Do you want Entertainolgy?  Because this is how you get Entertainolgy.

[Stefanie Sparkleface]

10 hours ago, Elsalvajeloco said:

Damn, people find any reason not to support small businesses. One week it's "man, I dunno if I really have much use for an old timey coffin". The next week it's, "Didn't you try to embalm someone who was still among the living?" This man clearly needs money to pay for a staff. And real staff unlike the one he would have later on. I mean Gangrel is probably only good to make runs to Starbucks.

Honest, hard-working (dead) Americans can't catch a break.

I lost a lot of money when I financed Papa Shango, so I'm a little wary about fiscally supporting the dark arts.

[odessasteps]

11 hours ago, zendragon said:

I swear Vince putting all his money in Swiss bank accounts and him, Bruce and Funkman attempting to avoid law enforcement by fleeing to the high seas L. Ron Hubbard style would be a hell of a coda to this sorid tale

Time for my second Swiss Money Holding reference of the week. 

[Technico Support]

20 hours ago, Stefanie Sparkleface said:

Members of the KKK obviously. It's hell for them!

Dick Murdoch and Bulldog Bob Brower?

[Technico Support]

Damn, I forgot to mention Lars Sullivan when discussing Vince McMahon's All Scumbags Wrestling (note: name is still begin workshopped).

https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Fh9utbg57phwc1.jpeg

 

 

[Log]

45 minutes ago, Technico Support said:

Damn, I forgot to mention Lars Sullivan when discussing Vince McMahon's All Scumbags Wrestling (note: name is still begin workshopped).

https://www.reddit.com/media?url=https%3A%2F%2Fi.redd.it%2Fh9utbg57phwc1.jpeg

 

 

There were two guys in that period of NXT that I thought had future star written all over them: Sullivan and Velveteen Dream. Boy do I know how to pick em. 

[RazorbladeKiss87]

14 hours ago, Stefanie Sparkleface said:

I lost a lot of money when I financed Papa Shango, so I'm a little wary about fiscally supporting the dark arts.

On the opposite side of things, financing The Godfather really padded my my retirement account. 

[Nice Guy Eddie]

23 hours ago, odessasteps said:

I figured Big Vis was the one scooping out the guts. It’s the name, after all. 

I did it early in my funeral career. I had to pour a saw dust like powder to absorb the liquids in a garbage bag. I had to cut the viscera to let the gasses out. I was sweating profusely, wretching as my glasses almost slid down my face in the bag of viscera. 

[The Natural]

8 hours ago, Log said:

There were two guys in that period of NXT that I thought had future star written all over them: Sullivan and Velveteen Dream. Boy do I know how to pick em. 

You've the reverse Midas touch ;).

Edited April 26 by The Natural

[zendragon]

I remember thinking when all his shit came out and he quite that maybe Ole Lars wasn't mentally cut out for the pressure cooker world of Pro wrestling and that maybe he would be better served somewhere else but he seems to be an un repentant asshole

[No Point Stance]

9 hours ago, Log said:

There were two guys in that period of NXT that I thought had future star written all over them: Sullivan and Velveteen Dream. Boy do I know how to pick em. 

For some reason this reminded me of one of my best friends, back when we were kids in the 1980s. His parents got excited about modern living and went out and bought a Betamax VCR and a Commodore VIC-20. I think he still harbours some sort of psychological grievance to this day. 

[Raziel]

2 hours ago, No Point Stance said:

For some reason this reminded me of one of my best friends, back when we were kids in the 1980s. His parents got excited about modern living and went out and bought a Betamax VCR and a Commodore VIC-20. I think he still harbours some sort of psychological grievance to this day. 

I know you're NOT talking about me but you are absolutly describing me.

[Zakk_Sabbath]

I thought HD-DVD was going to take off because it had Xbox support and Blu-ray players were prohibitively expensive (until PS3 came out) -  we've all been there