The Fast and Furious franchise thread

[Craig H]

That's obviously the dream casting, but you would have to grab Burt Reynolds and his mustache from an alternate universe where his health isn't poor.

[MADCAP]

Eh, it would be Paul's brother reprising Typical White Boy's Name's role. That feels just a tad gross and I couldn't see Vin going for that because of his friendship with Paul and to a lesser extent, the ending of 7.

"Hey, I know we made this beautiful ending and send-off for Paul, but check it out...Brian's BACK!"

They could also say it's Brian's twin brother, which, given how ridiculous the series is, that may work, but that may also be one ridiculous step too far.

In any event, I want the proposed sequel from the Furious 7 episode of How Did This Get Made, where mommy Shaw, played by Helen Mirren, busts out a healthy Deckard and Owen. IT WRITES ITSELF! I don't give a shit what they do after that, but as long as it's the Shaw Family vs. WE'RE FAMILY and set in NYC, I will be there opening night.

So let's say Helen Mirren joins the cast and Brian is indeed gone, what cool as actor do you want joining THE FAMILY?

OR...they could go the route that Beerfest took with Landfill:

http://youtu.be/0w9DUTcAI0o

[Reed]

It is quite hard to watch the ending of Furious 7 without getting teary-eyed, though.

 

Deeply Hurting but Still Manly and Stoic and Carrying on Because He Has To Vin Diesel™ should narrate more things.

 

Like WW2 or JFK documentaries.    

[supremebve]

It is quite hard to watch the ending of Furious 7 without getting teary-eyed, though.

 

Deeply Hurting but Still Manly and Stoic and Carrying on Because He Has To Vin Diesel™ should narrate more things.

 

Like WW2 or JFK documentaries.    

You know I didn't think about it until you brought it up, but Vin Diesel trying to hold back tears should be the go to for every overly emotional manly moment.  Stop putting people in redface for litter ads, have Vin Diesel standing on the side of the road looking like he doesn't know whether to cry or kick your ass for throwing a gum wrapper out your car window.  The over the top "Go America" pregame flag, anthem, Air Force flyover, should be replaced with the racially ambiguous Vin Diesel staring at the American flag as a single tear drops from his eye.  Vin Diesel should just hang out at the Grand Canyon and stare out over the horizon with the look of a man who has reached nirvana, and then turn around and make meaningful eye contact with every other man who looks over that magnificent hole.

[Reed]

 

It is quite hard to watch the ending of Furious 7 without getting teary-eyed, though.

 

Deeply Hurting but Still Manly and Stoic and Carrying on Because He Has To Vin Diesel™ should narrate more things.

 

Like WW2 or JFK documentaries.    

You know I didn't think about it until you brought it up, but Vin Diesel trying to hold back tears should be the go to for every overly emotional manly moment.  Stop putting people in redface for litter ads, have Vin Diesel standing on the side of the road looking like he doesn't know whether to cry or kick your ass for throwing a gum wrapper out your car window.  The over the top "Go America" pregame flag, anthem, Air Force flyover, should be replaced with the racially ambiguous Vin Diesel staring at the American flag as a single tear drops from his eye.  Vin Diesel should just hang out at the Grand Canyon and stare out over the horizon with the look of a man who has reached nirvana, and then turn around and make meaningful eye contact with every other man who looks over that magnificent hole.

 

 

Diesel genuinely got to me at the end of that movie.

 

Very few acting performances (with the exceptions of Stallone at the end of the Rocky, Courtney Love in The People vs. Larry Flynt and James Gandolfini in The Sopranos) have had that impact on me.

 

Which is funny because Diesel is not, in any technical sense, that good an actor.

[Reed]

Hey, if Gwyneth Paltrow can win several awards for basically being a plank of wood in Shakespeare in Love, Diesel should win awards for his performance in those final few scenes.

 

That's all I have to say. 

[supremebve]

 

 

It is quite hard to watch the ending of Furious 7 without getting teary-eyed, though.

 

Deeply Hurting but Still Manly and Stoic and Carrying on Because He Has To Vin Diesel™ should narrate more things.

 

Like WW2 or JFK documentaries.    

You know I didn't think about it until you brought it up, but Vin Diesel trying to hold back tears should be the go to for every overly emotional manly moment.  Stop putting people in redface for litter ads, have Vin Diesel standing on the side of the road looking like he doesn't know whether to cry or kick your ass for throwing a gum wrapper out your car window.  The over the top "Go America" pregame flag, anthem, Air Force flyover, should be replaced with the racially ambiguous Vin Diesel staring at the American flag as a single tear drops from his eye.  Vin Diesel should just hang out at the Grand Canyon and stare out over the horizon with the look of a man who has reached nirvana, and then turn around and make meaningful eye contact with every other man who looks over that magnificent hole.

 

 

Diesel genuinely got to me at the end of that movie.

 

Very few acting performances (with the exceptions of Stallone at the end of the Rocky, Courtney Love in The People vs. Larry Flynt and James Gandolfini in The Sopranos) have had that impact on me.

 

Which is funny because Diesel is not, in any technical sense, that good an actor.

 

Stallone as Rocky has a few.  He kills multiple scenes in that series, and they all surprise you despite the fact that you've seen those movies multiple times.  Vin Diesel's range goes from meathead to idiot, but he knows how to make meatheads and idiots feel real.  His cornball family speeches always sound like they are coming from your recently divorced, fuck up uncle, who got drunk at Thanksgiving and started telling everybody how much he loves them.  Sure you want to make fun of him, but in the moment you know he really means it. 

[Reed]

I put Diesel and Stallone in the same category.

 

They've both done more bad movies than good. Done more terrible performances than good ones. They will never win loads of awards.

 

But, sometimes, just sometimes, they get it just right and, it's, like, yeah, not even a Stanislavsky-trained, five-time Emmy award winner could do better or be more genuine. 

 

X factor, man. Even the best acting schools can't teach that.

[Cristobal]

I have a vague recollection of someone making the argument that "action hero" is a different kind of acting than what we normally think of as acting. I think the idea was that it's one thing to do Shakespeare well, but it's whole different kind of talent to take shitty action movie dialogue and make it resemble actual human speech.

[Ace]

I put Diesel and Stallone in the same category.

 

They've both done more bad movies than good. Done more terrible performances than good ones. They will never win loads of awards.

 

But, sometimes, just sometimes, they get it just right and, it's, like, yeah, not even a Stanislavsky-trained, five-time Emmy award winner could do better or be more genuine. 

 

X factor, man. Even the best acting schools can't teach that.

 

Yep. For all the shit he even gets in this thread, people forget that Furious 8 isn't the first time Vin's brought a tear to the eye.

 

[Craig H]

Does "We are Groot" also count because that got me good too.

[Reed]

I have a vague recollection of someone making the argument that "action hero" is a different kind of acting than what we normally think of as acting. I think the idea was that it's one thing to do Shakespeare well, but it's whole different kind of talent to take shitty action movie dialogue and make it resemble actual human speech.

 

Willis in Die Hard picking glass out of his feet spring to mind.

 

Like, it's cliched nonsense and your regular troubled family stuff ("Tell my wife I said I'm sorry!") but he plays it so well he gives it an edge and it might as well be Tennessee Williams. 

[Niners Fan in CT]

Bruce was very real in The Last Boy Scout. What a great performance there. What a film.  But yeah, Vin Diesel makes the Dom character completely believable and not just anyone would be able to do that.  Paul Walker was tremendous also.

[Reed]

There were so many things Walker did well in this role.

 

I don't even mean this in a "speak well of the dead" type-way; he just brought way more to the character than, I suspect, was on the page.

 

There were always this niceness but underlying anxiousness about the Brian O'Conner character. IIRC, Hobbs was calling him out in Rio for betraying the force and his oath and O'Conner rolled his eyes and outwardly acted like he didn't care, but you could tell: That remark got to him.

 

Like, Walker was never going to win an Oscar, but he knew how to work with what he had, you know?

[AxB]

Charlize Theron & Helen Mirren both confirmed cast in F&F8. So that'll be another good one, then.

[J.T.]

They totally need to cast Dame Mirren as Mama Shaw.

[John Austin]

I've been binge watching Game Sack videos on YouTube and been getting a Loy of spots of Fate of the Furious before every episode and one of them has the Rock pushing away a damn torpedo. I could not stop laughing at that one.

I know they've always been ridiculous but man this next one is going to be fun. I can't wait to see this one next week.

[John Austin]

On ‎6‎/‎16‎/‎2016 at 10:15 AM, J.T. said:

They totally need to cast Dame Mirren as Mama Shaw.

You called it!

[TheVileOne]

The Fast and the Furious movies are pretty much GI Joe and Avengers mashed up at this point. 

[ivpvideos]

Saw Fate Of The Furious tonight. It was everything you would want in a Fast & The Furious movie

[Craig H]

9:15 PM tonight!!! I'm fucking stoked!

[Craig H]

 Loved it. It continues the trend of being crazier than the one before it. There's obviously stuff that will make you scratch your head and wonder why certain things are playing out, but for me, it's easy to dismiss those thoughts because it's a Fast and Furious movie. 

[John Austin]

Excellent. I'm at the theater waiting for my show to start so I'm real excited.

[Kevin Wilson]

I saw a "screening" of it on Wednesday ( I am not sure why a screening happened the day before it opened). For mindless action/comedy (I know its not a comedy but it plays for laughs quite a bit) its a pretty fun movie, I enjoyed it. Major logic gaps, but that is par for the course in these types of movies, I find the quicker I let my brain get over it the more I enjoy the movie. I think The Rock was the clear star, everything he did got an audible reaction from the theater, I wouldn't have liked it near as much if his role wasn't in it.

[J.T.]

On ‎4‎/‎6‎/‎2017 at 10:19 PM, TheVileOne said:

The Fast and the Furious movies are pretty much GI Joe and Avengers mashed up at this point. 

You say that like it's a bad thing.

This movie was gigantic dumb fun and the closest we poor Americans will come to a kick ass spy epic like a Bond franchise.

Huge plot and logic gaps but who really cares?  Professional thief reforms and joins the Car & Driver version of SHIELD / UNCLE?  Fuck it. 

I was totally stoked when Helen Mirren showed up as Lady Shaw, 

I love the way this franchise has a knack for turning previous bad guys into good guys.  I cannot say that "the new additions to the team are The Shaw Brothers," without cracking a wry smile.  ANDY THEY FUCKING HAD JET PACKS~!

The easy assumption is that Little Nobody is Brian V.2 and with Cypher's escape there will be another one of these which I will be more than happy to watch. 

I also assume that the bad blood between Vin and The Rock means that Hobbes's choice to become a soccer dad means that The Rock is calling it quits.  At least Vin didn't have Hobbes clipped at the submarine base.

Now if only Roman / Tyrese would die in a hail of bullets, that would be super.  Tyrese must've had that scene where he kills the Russians riding snowmobiles written in so that Roman wouldn't completely look like the comedy relief dumbass of the team.

Cypher's Super-AWAC is the most badass villain hideout that there as ever been.  Only the Hall of Doom appearing in a future JL movie (if the DCU survives that long) will surpass it in demonic beauty.

What I learned from this movie.  Everyone in Havana drives a souped up 1958 Ford 300.