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2014 UPCOMING MOVIES/CASTING/TERRIBLE PROJECTS...


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What's wrong with Christian Mingle having a movie?

 

Nothing.  I mean, I have no interest in seeing it, but I have no problem with them having it.

 

But goddammit, I really want to see a movie called FUCK: The Christian Mingle Movie

 

Or maybe

 

FUCK: The Christian Mingle Story.

 

Something like that.

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What's wrong with Christian Mingle having a movie?

 

BlackPeopleMeet: The Movie would be vastly superior and should've been made first. Duh.

 

 

Isn't this pretty muich what the Think Like A Man movies are?

 

And hey, it's like Cape Fear but with Black People!

 

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Gary Owen, despite having a black wife and a black act for about 20 years, is still white. THIS IS BLACKPEOPLEMEET: THE MOVIE!

 

Gary Owen is blacker than most black people I know.   The Hispanic dude that Gabrielle Union hangs with in the movie, however, is clearly a white man.

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As an unofficial official executive producer, I am still saying no. My word is final.

 

I find these terms acceptable.  Now, how about this Idris Elba as Max Cady dealie?  I am kinda stoked for this movie.

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Clearing out the queue on Netflix streaming:

 

Apostle of Comedy: Onward and Upward - I have no idea how this got in my queue in the first place.  If you're not familiar, the "Apostles" are a trio of comedians that do Christian "family friendly" comedy.  This particular concert was filmed at some kind of marriage seminar/retreat thing.  The humor is not religious, just not dirty.  And, quite frankly, that's a refreshing change from 99.99999% of all comedy out there.  And...it's funny.  I laughed A LOT.  Very, very entertaining.  8/10.

 

Devil's Knot - Hollywood take on the West Memphis Three case.  Reese Witherspoon stars but does nothing of note.  This is a very "blah" retelling of the case.  It will certainly convince you that the boys were railroaded but it does so in a very...average way.  This isn't bad or anything but if you're familiar with the case, there's no need to watch this.  If you're not familiar, watch the documentaries instead.  5/10.

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Stranger By the Lake

My wife and I have had this ongoing discussion about lack of pang in films and how unfair it is that Kate Winslett has to show all her business while Leo Dicaprio can show a little toosh and that's noodz for him. This one makes up for nearly a life time of pang-less films. Basically there's a nude beach where dudes go cruising for other dudes, and Franck(of course this movie is French) falls for this sexy dude with a Tom Selleck mustache. Things get a little crazy when Franck witnesses his crush drown a guy in the lake. Really great cinematography in this, and it's a great example of showing not telling. For example, it seems pretty clear that the film takes place in an earlier decade, but it's never explicitly explained when that is through some classic song or a time stamp - like in American Hustle where it's trying so goddamned hard to let you know THIS IS THE 70's YOU KNOOOOOW. And it seems apparent that the film is a criticism of gay men who didn't take act more responsible when AIDS was more understood. Again it's not explicitly said or mentioned, but it feels pretty clear to me. This probably would have been more problematic if this were made in the early 90s or late 80s, when it seemed gay sex was equated to death - but this film is more looking back with more thoughtfulness. 

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What's wrong with Christian Mingle having a movie?

 

A movie about a dating site?  Christian or not, it's gonna be lousy.  A DVDVR Message Board movie on the other hand......

 

 

Stranger By the Lake

My wife and I have had this ongoing discussion about lack of pang in films and how unfair it is that Kate Winslett has to show all her business while Leo Dicaprio can show a little toosh and that's noodz for him. This one makes up for nearly a life time of pang-less films. Basically there's a nude beach where dudes go cruising for other dudes, and Franck(of course this movie is French) falls for this sexy dude with a Tom Selleck mustache. Things get a little crazy when Franck witnesses his crush drown a guy in the lake. Really great cinematography in this, and it's a great example of showing not telling. For example, it seems pretty clear that the film takes place in an earlier decade, but it's never explicitly explained when that is through some classic song or a time stamp - like in American Hustle where it's trying so goddamned hard to let you know THIS IS THE 70's YOU KNOOOOOW. And it seems apparent that the film is a criticism of gay men who didn't take act more responsible when AIDS was more understood. Again it's not explicitly said or mentioned, but it feels pretty clear to me. This probably would have been more problematic if this were made in the early 90s or late 80s, when it seemed gay sex was equated to death - but this film is more looking back with more thoughtfulness. 

 

I have to assume there's a part of Kate Winslet that just enjoys being naked, because it just doesn't seem like an actress with as much success as she has had would ever HAVE to get naked in a movie if she didn't want to. 

 

Besides, dammit, Kate Winslet naked is not a bad thing, so let's not discourage it :D

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What's wrong with Christian Mingle having a movie?

 

A movie about a dating site?  Christian or not, it's gonna be lousy.  A DVDVR Message Board movie on the other hand......

 

 

 

 

I am terrified at who other posters would want to cast in my role.

 

Fuck that would be one scary party game.

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