2022 UPCOMING MOVIE DISCUSSION

[The Comedian]

On 7/6/2022 at 1:47 PM, (BP) said:

I wonder what kind of movies Kevin Smith would be making now if he was the one who became a prestige director and David O Russell was about to release Spanking the Monkey 3: Still Spanking. 

It would have been nice if he'd focused on movies instead of writing shitty comics and hooking up with adult Caitlyn on the Degrassi reboot. I will never forgive the SOB for killing Karen Page.

The one thing I will defend him for is his MOTU reboot that people hated on for being woke. I guarantee any wokeness in that shit was 100% accidental. The only only reason Smith made that shit was to update his 80's Teela/Sorceress threesome fantasies. 

[Mister TV]

On 7/6/2022 at 1:30 PM, RIPPA said:

Clerks III

Yup....

So is that Lit song going to be used to represent the 90's like "For What It's Worth" did/still does for the 60'?

With Clerks II, I could never buy that Dante & Randall would work at a fast food restaurant, there's no way they'd go from Quick Stop and RST Video to something that involves that much actual work, off brand cellphone store or mall kiosk sure, but not fast food. That makes me wonder, if the same studio produced both Clerks and Mallrats would Smith have had Dante and Randall working somewhere in the Mallrats mall?

[Craig H]

My friends and I all watched that Clerks 3 trailer last night and then had a discussion about it because we were so confused about when and where and how Kevin Smith lost his fastball. My hypothesis is that it stemmed from Smith being so overly combative to every single shred of criticism he would receive, which lead to actual good actors not working with him anymore, and lead to him saying, "fuck it, I'm going to make movies that make me laugh." It's the same thing as Vince McMahon. Ultimately, when you're writing and directing for an audience of one, the amount of other people that are going to like your work is going to be very small.

And so looking at Clerks 3, it's just Kevin Smith pulling from his own heart attack and his efforts to make Clerks, but honestly, if I wanted to see Clerks, I would just watch Clerks. This meta movie about making a movie stuff just seems like the most low effort material he could make.

It's just so weird to see the trajectory his career took. The writing and directing was all very good and sound up through Zack and Miri and while Zack and Miri was competent enough as a movie, I think that's what ultimately broke him because he was really lashing out over how it should have been a bigger movie than it was and it was everyone else's fault the movie tanked. Then he does Copout where he has the whole kerfuffle with Bruce Willis and it's also the first time he directed a movie he didn't write. After that he does the Terry Funk thing where he says fuck it, I'm out, no wait, I'm actually back in and here's my movie Red State and I'm not doing a wide release, now I'm done again because the Hollywood system sucks, no wait, I'm back again with these really shitty horror movies, I'm done again, shit, now I'm back and I'm doing Mallrats 2 and here's a bunch of tweets with everyone coming back for Mallrats 2 and that ultimately falls completely apart presumably because Jennifer Garner still had Ben Affleck locked down and wouldn't let him play with Kev, and on and on and on.

[Dolfan in NYC]

12 minutes ago, Mister TV said:

With Clerks II, I could never buy that Dante & Randall would work at a fast food restaurant, there's no way they'd go from Quick Stop and RST Video to something that involves that much actual work, off brand cellphone store or mall kiosk sure, but not fast food. That makes me wonder, if the same studio produced both Clerks and Mallrats would Smith have had Dante and Randall working somewhere in the Mallrats mall?

I could be wrong but I think the mall they shot in has since become a dead mall and/or was torn down.  

But that is a fantastic point about those two working at a fast food place.  That shit is back breaking work.   And unless that video store has become a dispensary first/video store second, there's zero reason for them to be there too, at what appears to be their late 40's - early 50's.  

Oh, and speaking of looks....  Rosario Dawson is still, and I say this as an impartial observer, a fucking total smoke show.  Good for her. 

[(BP)]

Most of that is objectively true, although I’d put a more positive spin on it. He was an insecure dilettante struggling to work within the Hollywood system who then created a second career as a media personality while making fan service movies for his niche audience. He made a lot of money touring Jay and Silent Bob Reboot as a roadshow right before Covid, and he’s explicitly stated that the Clerks III tour will make him and his family financially secure for life. This is his last big score and he seems fine with it.

Incidentally, I’m way, way higher on Red State and Tusk than most, while also admitting Yoga Hosers is total shit. 

As far as Mallrats 2, my recollection is that he pitched it as a movie to Universal, but they would only do it as a streaming series, which none of the services were interested in. 

[Mister TV]

16 minutes ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

I could be wrong but I think the mall they shot in has since become a dead mall and/or was torn down.  

But that is a fantastic point about those two working at a fast food place.  That shit is back breaking work.   And unless that video store has become a dispensary first/video store second, there's zero reason for them to be there too, at what appears to be their late 40's - early 50's.  

Oh, and speaking of looks....  Rosario Dawson is still, and I say this as an impartial observer, a fucking total smoke show.  Good for her. 

The Mall is still open, they even have legit anchor stores!
https://www.edenprairiecenter.com

Going by the Mom & Pop Video stores near me, RST would go from video store, to 95% adult videos video store, to we'll sell your stuff on eBay store, to burner cell phone store, to vape shop, to dispensary. I can see Randall still working at whatever was in that spot.

Edited July 7, 2022 by Mister TV

[Craig H]

23 minutes ago, Mister TV said:

The Mall is still open, they even have legit anchor stores!
https://www.edenprairiecenter.com

Going by the Mom & Pop Video stores near me, RST would go from video store, to 95% adult videos video store, to we'll sell your stuff on eBay store, to burner cell phone store, to vape shop, to dispensary. I can see Randall still working at whatever was in that spot.

Quick note: It may be forgotten, but the Quick Stop and RST burned down at the start of Clerks 2.

[Dolfan in NYC]

Well, I can tell you one thing for certain.  That convenience store would have had zero shot at survival for 30 years now, if they a) had any kind of supermarket within a few miles, since their prices are literally always higher, b) didn't have a gas station attached, and/or c) (And this is a NJ/NYC area thing) didn't have a deli with a grill, making breakfast sandwiches. 

 

[HumanChessgame]

3 hours ago, Craig H said:

Quick note: It may be forgotten, but the Quick Stop and RST burned down at the start of Clerks 2.

The final act is Jay and Silent Bob giving them the money to buy and repair it, and the last shot is them re-opening it showing Dante manning the register.

I think the best comment I heard about Smith's modern filmmaking career is "his fans grew up but he didn't". This is just my personal taste, but his movies haven't aged well. A year or two ago I watched part of Chasing Amy when it happened to come on, and holy shit is most of the plot comes off as an incel's wet dream.

Ironically enough, Clerks 2 is the only one I find re-watchable.  The statements about being listless when life in your 30s doesn't end up as you'd pictured and friendships/relationships evolving as you get older actually came off as sincere and accurate.

3 hours ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

Well, I can tell you one thing for certain.  That convenience store would have had zero shot at survival for 30 years now, if they a) had any kind of supermarket within a few miles, since their prices are literally always higher, b) didn't have a gas station attached, and/or c) (And this is a NJ/NYC area thing) didn't have a deli with a grill, making breakfast sandwiches. 

 

It looks like the stores are located right next to a neighborhood/apartment complex and if that's the case the convenience store would probably get enough foot traffic from people walking over to get beer, smokes, or sundries instead of driving to a grocery store. My former apartment complex had some dingy minimart right next to it that always did brisk business as the actual grocery store was about a mile down the road. It was also right next to a liquor store, so that probably had something to do with it as well. I could see the video store being one of those used video/retro gaming stores that has enough of a niche clientele, but it looks like it's become a dispensary in order to stay afloat.

[odessasteps]

I’d still take Dogma as my favorite movie of his, prob due to Carlin and Rickman. although I think Clerks cartoon is overall favorite.

[Dolfan in NYC]

2 hours ago, odessasteps said:

I’d still take Dogma as my favorite movie of his, prob due to Carlin and Rickman. although I think Clerks cartoon is overall favorite.

 

omg bear is driving.  How can that be?

[twiztor]

will i watch Clerks 3? definitely.

will i think it's awesome?  probably not. 

i've skipped almost all (excepting Zack & Miri) of Kevin Smith's output since Clerks 2, but good on him for doing his thing. Would also tune in for a Mallrats 2 if that would ever come to pass

[colonial]

The new Salems Lot movie has been moved from this coming September to April 2023 due to "COVID-related post-production delays."

 

[RIPPA]

Day Shift

Director: Chad Stahelski

Jamie Foxx, Dave Franco, Snoop Dogg

Trailer is NSFW due to language and CGI blood

[RIPPA]

Warner Brothers has decided to not release the House Party reboot that was supposed to hit HBO Max at the end of the month.

They are currently no plans to reschedule the movie at this time

[J.T.]

48 minutes ago, RIPPA said:

Warner Brothers has decided to not release the House Party reboot that was supposed to hit HBO Max at the end of the month.

They are currently no plans to reschedule the movie at this time

A benevolent God always answers the prayer of the fervent.   If there is any film in all of blackdom that needs a reboot, it is Holla.

MORE AFRICAN-AMERICAN HORROR MOVIES~!

Edited July 12, 2022 by J.T.

[Brian Fowler]

I really like Red State (and going to the road tour of it was a lot of fun. 

I never watched Tusk or Yoga Hosers, but they looked dire.

The Jay and Silent Bob jam a few years ago was such a "for fans only" thing,  but I enjoyed it well enough.  Not enough to have rewatched it though. 

Edited July 13, 2022 by Brian Fowler

[J.T.]

Given the current US culture war, Red State may be more relevant now than the day it was made.

Yoga Hosers is pretty stupid.

Tusk is not as bad as the reviews let on.  It is a pretty enthralling body horror joint with a heartbreaking ending and the stealth Johnny Depp role is kinda great.

Edited July 13, 2022 by J.T.

[Craig H]

Tusk is...Man...Some of Tusk, primarily the first part, is really, really, really bad. There's a lot of blame to go around for that, whether it's to Smith for his writing or Justin Long for sucking so much. The second part of that movie though, the body horror stuff, is good. I would say if you can make it through that first part and wash that all from your brain then you can probably "enjoy" the rest of the movie.

I mean, it's a pretty fucked up movie. The podcast it was based on was pretty funny and while I wanted to laugh at the idea of a man being turned into a walrus, it's too fucked up to laugh at.

The end though, the very end, is a little on the silly side, but it's not as bad as the first part of that movie.

[Dolfan in NYC]

Remember when you listened to "Dragula" and "Thunder Kiss '65" back in the day?   Well, this is your fault.

THE MUNSTERS

Starring Jeff Daniel Phillips, Sheri Moon Zombie, and Daniel Roebuck

Directed by Rob Zombie

[Craig H]

And I have never, ever, wanted to watch Yoga Hosers. 

EDIT: I would rather watch that Munsters movie than Yoga Hosers.

Edited July 13, 2022 by Craig H

[Curt McGirt]

Rob, you got what you wanted. Now, just... stop. 

[odessasteps]

I’d rather see that than THOR at this point. 
 

did nt know it was a prequel/origin story. 

[Craig H]

20 minutes ago, Dolfan in NYC said:

Remember when you listened to "Dragula" and "Thunder Kiss '65" back in the day?   Well, this is your fault.

THE MUNSTERS

Starring Jeff Daniel Phillips, Sheri Moon Zombie, and Daniel Roebuck

Directed by Rob Zombie

By the way, the fuck is up with the audio in that trailer? It sounds all shitty and tinny. And I don't think replicating the sound of the TV can be used as an excuse because it certainly didn't sound like that. This looks like a really bad SNL sketch.

[(BP)]

I’m still looking forward to The Munsters because my son watches the 90s SyFy Musters Scary Little Christmas all of the time and the new trailer has him hyped. This somehow looks less professional than that. Tough week to be a fan of Kevin Smith and Robert Zombie. Gen X icons out here showing their whole ass.