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Pitchers & Catchers Report 2/17/16


RIPPA
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Fuck that. I have standards.

He'll let you get raped by one of his pet dolphins he keeps in his underground lair.
For an MLB salary? I'M IN!

You might want to look into the survival rate of humans getting raped by Dolphins before you check this out.

And yes, that does happen.

A discussion of dolphin rape in a baseball thread is something that could only happen on this board.

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Fuck that. I have standards.

He'll let you get raped by one of his pet dolphins he keeps in his underground lair.
For an MLB salary? I'M IN!

You might want to look into the survival rate of humans getting raped by Dolphins before you check this out.

And yes, that does happen.

I'd imagine the problem there is drowning, not getting penetrated to death by dolphin penis.

*adds another to the list of "sentences which may never have been written in the entire history of the English language"*

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Fuck that. I have standards.

He'll let you get raped by one of his pet dolphins he keeps in his underground lair.
For an MLB salary? I'M IN!

You might want to look into the survival rate of humans getting raped by Dolphins before you check this out.

And yes, that does happen.

I'd imagine the problem there is drowning, not getting penetrated to death by dolphin penis.

*adds another to the list of "sentences which may never have been written in the entire history of the English language"*

 

Well, if it's going to be one or the other, I'll choose drowning over dolphin penis. 

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Why not neither?

If it's one or the other. If I'm ever in the middle of the ocean and I'm going to end up drowning, I'd at least like to drown without having encountered any dolphin penis. 

 

Spring training can't get here fast enough. 

 

 

But what if the Dolphin came in, and pushed the penis right into your penis taking part, and that then boosted you up to the surface and stopped your from drowning? Was the Dolphin Penis your friend or foe in this circumstance?

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Why not neither?

If it's one or the other. If I'm ever in the middle of the ocean and I'm going to end up drowning, I'd at least like to drown without having encountered any dolphin penis.

Spring training can't get here fast enough.

But what if the Dolphin came in, and pushed the penis right into your penis taking part, and that then boosted you up to the surface and stopped your from drowning? Was the Dolphin Penis your friend or foe in this circumstance?

In that circumstance, I guess I'd say thank you to the dolphin.
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