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Smackdown Is Won't Someone Think Of Heath Slater's Children?


The Green Meanie

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And God Damn Natalya for not getting out there before Carmella started talking. People are just like agog at how awkward she is.  Turn off the volume and look at the front row and the looks on their faces like..troubled and concerned like they're watching someone set  themselves on fire.

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Smackdown had a very B show feel but I liked most of what they did. Orton/Del Rio was a good match and they're trying to tell the story that no matter what you do to Orton, he can still hit that RKO. The Eva stuff was funny again and Becky cut a good fired up promo. The build to Ambrose vs Ziggler continues to be solid. Heath was great again. How about Maryse on the desk?

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-American Alpha booking was kinda shoddy.  Why have all those teams come down to the ring and stand around and watch them wrestle and not one of them interferes in the match?!  They all wait to have a nice, orderly brawl.

-Loving the Eva Marie booking, though there's no real endgame for it that's going to be as satisfying as the build-up.  Alexa Bliss looked better than I expected.

-"Missed" Orton-Del Rio as I was paying the pizza guy.  Up here in Canada, we're just getting Season 1 of Lucha Underground and it's so sad to watch the juxtaposition of super-over and excited Alberto, hero of the people, and bored, lifeless Del Rio, who cares.  What's fascinating is that it wouldn't really take that much to update his character.  Either turn him face and have him rallying the crowds and they'd probably get behind him as long as he played fired-up and cool, not pandering.  Or keep him heel and make him more vicious, as well as bring back the cars and the cockiness.  But all he does, week in week out, is come out, lose, and say "Perro" a bunch.

-This is the most I've enjooyed Nattie...ever.  Her beating up the new women (Including Becky) is very enjoyable.  But the booking was all wrong, as she should have beaten Carmella into near-unconscious.  I also like to imagine Vince et al. backstage during Carmella's entrance "Why isn't she over?!  She's walking backwards?!  Cheer her, dammit!"

-I'm a bigger fan than most here of Dolph/Dean but I could not have been less interested in that main event.  I mean, any one could have picked who was going to drop the fall in that match.  When is Luke Harper coming back?!

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The show was decent enough. It just feels lacking with only Cena/AJ feeling like a big feud, and that wasn't even on the show outside of a video package.

It was nice seeing Bliss and Carmella victorious in their debuts though Carmella apart from Enzo/Cass really hurts her gimmick. They really should have either waited to debut her in a new gimmick or had her go to Raw instead. I'm curious to see just how many ways they can hold off Eva actually making her in ring debut on SDL. I so hope it continues and not just because she isn't good.

Similarly I want to see how long they can hold off Slater getting a contract on either show. Everything was so perfect in this one.

Orton/Del Rio was surprisingly good, way better than I expected from two guys who rarely feel motivated.

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Orton/Del Rio was very solid. Dug the booking there with Alberto threatening to break Orton's arm before the match then ending up going after it with a steel chair, reminded me of what Ambrose said on the Austin podcast about using an injury to further a story. Enjoying the Ambrose/Ziggler feud, one of the matches I'm looking forward to most at SummerSlam. Thought Carmella looked surprisingly decent and her finisher actually looked like a real solid submission though I was surprised to see Natalya lose by tapout just like that. Alexa looked good as usual too. Rhyno rules and the Styles/Cena package did a good job hyping their match without them being on the show.

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Just now, Peck said:

Rhyno saying he needs to think of his new constituents... who apparently disapprove of job growth? Hilarious bit though.

Maybe someone else in Detroit is up for a contract.  You can't have those jobs going to West Virginia.

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All of the matches tonight were technically sound, and entertaining. The funny thing about SDL has been that you're kind of in a trance whilst watching it, then once it's done you've realized what you saw. Things that I just remembed:

Did Otunga imply Carmella was in the mob?

Did JBL say he's never heard of Michael Jackson?

How long was Baron Corbin beating up Kalisto for?

Why was ADR sitting on the ring announcer?

Are they keeping Eve Marie's announcer behind the curtain?

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This show was a slog at only two hours.

It was kinda worth it just to think about some lady in Michigan casting her vote based on how badly one man can beat up Heath Slater, though. 

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4 minutes ago, The Green Meanie said:

Why was ADR sitting on the ring announcer?

Speaking of, did anyone make out what Greg was trying to say while that happened?  Legit laughed at that.

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I like the idea that someone might have just shown Vince Total Recall and he loved Benny the Cab driver "Hey, I got 4 kids to feed...I thought it was 2". If Slater becomes an Uber driver, those videos will be gold.

JBL had me cracking up with his deadpan responses to Otunga. JBL was saying something about Michael Hayes inventing moonwalking and David Otunga being all nerdy says "thats not true, you ever hear of Michael Jackson" and JBL deadpans a no. It had me cracking up. I think Otunga is a horrible choice to be the third guy with them. He might be good in the studio setting, but in this live quick paced one he is way horrible.

Eva Marie as the eventual Smackdown Women's champion will be amazing.

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