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I got roped into THE WHITE QUEEN on Netflix.  Pulpy, hot-princessy awesomeness that is best watched with Wikipeida opened to for cross-referencing and for Rupert Graves being the most badass nonchalant asshole ever.

But my DVR has gone from 70% to 85% full and that's with everything in SD, so there is going to be a reckoning.

And I did get a card in the mail from OWN saying:

 

 

 

"We miss you and want you back!!

Opraour loyal customers mean Oprahthing to us.  To showprah you how much we Oprecciate and miss you, we've enclosed the following special gifts:

- Two Tyne Daley's  and one Loretta Switt from the Topps 1997 "Wise women who love poorly" series.

- A special collector's index card glossary for understanding the following dangerous teen trends: Planking, bracelet parties, sexting, fire challenge-ing, snorlting, saltine-ing, Hand sanitizering, getting seduced by Tim Matheson-ing, Vodka eyeballing, smartie freebasing, rectal tamponing, car surfing, web surfing, surfing, "serfing", purple dranking, chatroullette, the most dangerous game, Mazes and Monstering, Ouija boarding, water boarding, bored board hoarding, overlording, Tracy Lording, Smorgasbording, Zardozing, and many many more.

- A lock of hair taken from a random middle aged man who probably deserves whatever you come up with.

- A chance to be part of our new reality show "Hi, I'm Shannon Doherty and I need a place to crash for a few days."*

 

 

 

*note: none of "Hi, I'm Shannon Doherty and I need a place to crash for a few days." will be filmed for broadcast.  We just really need someone to step in here.

So come back to us. OPRAHPLEAAASE!!!!!

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I met Tom Savini at Motor City Comic Con a few years back.  He is a nice guy, but there is something really off about that dude.

 

He enjoys talking about slasher movies a little too much.  I would not want to be the plumber that has to go check the crawlspace under his house.

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Yeah, 9PM seems to be the the magical cut-off time for nudity.   Jenny Agutter was not blurred out last night in the Logan's Run replay.

 

No, she certainly wasn't blurred out.  And bless El Rey for that.  Greatest channel ever, even with the incessant "Ride With Us" stuff that makes me want to stab someone.

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The only good thing about being out of a job is I have time to go through these movies on the DVR.  One of the only positives out of this type of situation.  But like Piranesi it's time to bring the DVR down a bit.

 

Speaking of DVR, does anybody else record some of these and just keep them?  I have a lot of the main kung fu flicks they put out at first and after watching them I couldn't bring myself to just delete them.  I need to get a DVD recorder but in the meantime they sit there.  If I can get through the stuff I haven't seen yet I might rewatch some of these.  No way in hell do I want to get rid of for example Dirty Ho or the 36th Chamber trilogy for example.

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I talked to a gal who used to go to all the horror conventions and she said Savini is an ass and a big cokehead. Take that for what it's worth. 

 

 

 

The only good thing about being out of a job is I have time to go through these movies on the DVR.  One of the only positives out of this type of situation.

 

Amen to that. I have so little to do right now that I just watch 'em all in real time. Luckily that's changing soon as my back is pretty well healed up...

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I would expect no less from Savini.

 

I don't mind the X-Files, but would much prefer something else on for hours on end all the time.

 

Right now I feel that this network is in its golden era, and once it gets picked up more broadly, we're going to have to suffer through a lot of "original programming" that's just reality show contests.  So I'm eating it up while I can.

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Proof that the marathons are uncut!

 

Black Belly of the Tarantula makes no sense at all but I dug that chase scene the most. The only thing that would have made it better would have been them putting a blood bag in the back of the dummy that fell off the roof.

 

EDIT: HA! The New York Ripper is still designated to the 1 AM slot. Even El Rey can't show a film with a guy sticking his toes in a vagina before that time in the morning.

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I talked to a gal who used to go to all the horror conventions and she said Savini is an ass and a big cokehead. Take that for what it's worth. 

 

 

I've spent a weekend at a convention with Savini. He's a big creeper as well.

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Saturday is your Swords, Sorcery, Shotguns and Laser Beams Marathon featuring: 

 

Red Sonja

The Beastmaster

Logan's Run

Outland

 

and then they're putting on Django, The Rebel Intruders, and King Eagle, I guess to fill out the Swords and Shotguns part in a different fashion. Since it's part of the marathon you might just to get nekkid Jenny Agutter before nine!

 

Red Sonja is on right now too and it's as silly as I remember. But anyway, by all means don't miss the Mutton for Punishment marathon on Thursday mentioned here before to get your kung fu on, that's a killer lineup. 

 

EDIT: Apparently RZA is presenting Heroes of the East tomorrow too if that's an extra pull for ya

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Coming soon to The Director's Chair: Francis Ford Coppola. Carpenter, Tarantino, Del Toro, now Coppola. Good choices to say the least. I'd love to see crazy old Herzog on there next. Or Van Peebles, or Spike Lee. Hell Spike just put out Da Sweet Blood of Jesus so he'd be a perfect choice.

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I couldn't wouldn't want him not to be. Like I wouldn't want Milius to not be an obnoxious dick-swinging war-monger.

I said the same thing first time i met Howard Chaykin. I would have disapointed had been a nice, quiet, pleasant fellow.

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I'm pissed I missed Five Fingers of Death. The finish of Heroes of the East was great, same for the beginning and end of Five Deadly Venoms but the police procedural plot started to bore so I wandered off to make lunch and missed pretty much the whole middle. Five Element Ninjas is indeed always perfect. 

 

It was so awesome that there is actually a line in Five Deadly Venoms where a dude says "Poison Clan rocks the world!"

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So I just ordered Slingtv at 20 bucks a month for all of 14 channels, just so I can get in on the El Rey action.....despite the fact I probably own every movie on their schedule in one form or another. But still, I'm thinking money well spent.

At least for the Shaw Brothers stuff, actually have quite a few movies that aren't (legally) available in English and in HD.

I hope they can get access to the 80s/90s Hong Kong releases, Category III sleazy action like Naked Killer is custom made for this channel.

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Guest The Magnificent 7

Yeah there is no way i would show New York Ripper before 10PM.  THINK OF THE CHILDREN~!

 

Do not miss Deathdream @ 7:30 PM EST!

 

Hopefully some people on this board will actually watch New York Ripper and then have a rethink about the lunacy of putting Fulci ahead of Argento. 

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