Grand Theft Auto V Talk.

[melraz09]

Hey J.T. If I'm on and you see a special crate is gonna be delivered send me an invite. I'll see if I can help ya get it.

[jstout]

Shit-talking black dude in the game chat had everyone ready to beat his ass, until this white kid came in and started telling everyone to speak correct English and how "yo" is not a word. I've never seen a group of people flip so quick from "let's beat this dude's ass" to "come on, dude, help us beat this kid's ass." That kid united enemies. We were all getting ready to pay him a visit when he left the game.

 

After tonight, I can definitely see why some of you stay as far away from Freemode as humanly possible. Herby and had just popped out of a mission when there were two dudes there shooting at us. This starts this crazy war between us where one of the guys is completely owning us both (he was 16-0 on me when he left, I think) and we were absolutely batting the other dude around to just an absurd extreme. 

 

Then we end up in another room and wind up getting into another scrape immediately with more dudes. This ends when Herby leaves and I figure one of the dudes driving up in a tank is plenty of reason to follow suit. I'm just tired of the pace of Freemode - it's KILL OR BE KILLED all of the time, and you can't even get away from a fight without someone following you (I've done the same thing a billion times, so I can't complain). 

 

Robert invited me to a couple of deathmatches, but every time I'd go, either he'd be not in the lobby or the game would say he was already gone. One of the deathmatches was pretty neat. We had a full room, 2 teams of 8. Everyone has pistols and both teams start in a gunfight-style line. After everyone kills each other once, people spawn in different places and it's a regular ol' deathmatch.

[Robert C]

That's why I keep trying to find a way to turn off all those automatic invites.  If a match isn't going to make or is one of those that really needs more players than will be in there, then I'm bailing out.  Same thing for the usual crappy suspects, or any melee deathmatches at this point.  Plus I got kicked several times due to server wierdness.

 

Got thrown into one match that I'd never done before.  Looked good - lots of people and decent settings.  Then I get a server error or something, and next thing I know I'm in that weird netherworld you get into sometimes, but I'm also underwater.  I swim to the surface, and suddenly I'm falling through a brown sky.  A parachute opens automatically.  When I get close to landing, suddenly I'm back under this weird brown water again.  Over and over for about 5 minutes before the game finally figure out whatever the hell it was doing.

 

Probably should just do a party if we're on at the same time, so I can warn you if I'm not going to stick around.

 

They really need to allow you to block certain matches/races automatically from the random list.  As it is now, the game and I have a very dysfunctional relationship.  My typical attempt to find a decent deathmatch last night was basically this:

 

me:  give me a random deathmatch

GTA:  ok, how about Prison Thugz?

me:  Thanks but no.  Something else please.

GTA:  Here's a crowd pleaser - Seal Team 6

me:  Sorry, no. 

GTA:  Ok, let me think.  I got it - Saving Ryan's Privates.

me:  Same problem as Seal Team 6.  Can I have something different please?

GTA:  Are you sure you don't want to do Prison Thugz?

me:  I'm sure, let's find something else

GTA:  How about this, then?  I've got a melee set in the prison, but it's not called Prison Thugz!

me:  uh-uh. 

GTA:  how about this exciting user created match on top of a building?  everybody has baseball bats!

me:  no melee.

GTA:  Seal Team 6!  No melee in that!

me:  Seriously?  We've been over this.

GTA:  here's a user created match with an enormous map and one other person in it.

me:  I'll spend 15 minutes in there to get 2 kills.

GTA:  are you absolutely certain you don't want to do Prison Thugz?

me:  you/re starting to piss me off.

GTA:  come on man, let's do Prison Thugz!  Everybody loves it!

me: Go to hell.  I'm gonna go put in Skyrim.

GTA:  Fine, be a loser.  I'll put you in Classy Construction.

me:  thank you.

[Dolfan in NYC]

Mob Wives cast member Karen Gravano (Sammy "The Bull" Gravano's daughter) is suing Rockstar for "stealing her image and life story" for this Random Character Mission: 

 

[jstout]

Robert, that at least explains the "he's gone, dood" error messages I was getting. I still don't mind it. I really liked that OK Corral (I think that was somewhere in the title and description) Deathmatch, despite costing my team about 100 kills. Actually, I think my kill/death ratio was something like 0.80, so that's not horrible.

 

i played some user-created races last night that I wish there was a stronger vote than "thumbs down" for. One started out with my car walled in with a jump ramp. I had to figure out how to back the car out of being walled in and try to take the ramp out to get out. One gave people no real idea where to go next - not enough checkpoints.

 

I thought about the DVDVR prime time crew when I got that damn "Jump and Die" race at the dam and accidentally did it, thinking it was "Jumps, Jumps, Jumps" and I could just knock it out real quick. I use races as a way to get into a new lobby if I don't like the one I'm currently in or I get bored waiting for something to happen in Freemode, and I thought that would be a painless way to go. Instead it was that damn dam race, all without Rippa's commentary to lively it up. I consider that one a "crew only" race, but I raced it with strangers and still managed to win.

 

A GTA friend of mine created a cute version of Prison Thugs where you're on top of the Arena brawling. Would've been a fantastic idea had there not already been a Prison Thugs. I played Prison Thugs last night 'cause a friend wanted to and spent a decent chunk of the time trying (and eventually succeeding) to wreck the bus so no one could use it. I was honking at players to get out of my way. 

[RIPPA]

Next Tuesday's Online Update

 

http://www.rockstargames.com/newswire/article/52200/GTA-Online-The-Business-Update-Coming-Next-Week-Tuesday

 

A side thing to this

 

 

Don't forget that this weekend is your last chance to grab the Albany Roosevelt limousine, the Gusenberg Sweeper machine gun and all the rest of the exclusive items from the Valentine's Day Massacre Special before they're gone. Once you purchase them in-game, they're yours to keep - but they will no longer be available to purchase after midnight PST this Sunday, March 2nd.

[Neil Koch]

Oh, joy... more overpriced vehicles

 

and I chuckled at this

 

 

And stay tuned for details about our upcoming Business Update Event Weekend as well as more info to be revealed on future updates including Online Heists, the Capture Creator update, new Assassination and Flight School missions for Story Mode and much more...

 

WTF wants more flight school?

[misanthrope304]

I still do not have the golf club weapon for online mode

[Neil Koch]

I don't think there is any way to have it outside of deathmatches.

[jstout]

Nope! It's easy. Go to the golf course during the day. Find a golfer. Punch him. He'll drop his club. Grab it. It's yours.

 

And more fast, uncontrollable cars are going to be a hard, hard sell to me. I got enough of those as is. That Roosevelt was an expensive sucker job. And they're offering suits after offering suits during Valentine's Day. Will have to see if the new Carbine is better than the Advanced Rifle. And a Capture creator? Who plays the Captures that Rockstar created? Dunno that we need stupid new ones.  

[RIPPA]

Long Haul II is a good concept in theory but in execution... yeah... no so much.

 

My biggest problem is that if I going to spend 10 minutes to finish a race - I need a hell of a lot more money

[AxB]

Best. Troll Race. Ever.

 

No habla Inglise, Americano. One of those Spanish-speaking guys was in an East London Crew for some reason. I'm surprised you didn't win that. You've got NOS*.

 

Also, can I just say how truly fitting it is that the Wedding Themed Deathmatch was won by a girl dressed all in White. Who's LoveMachine 1970? He moves like Nightcrawler and takes several shots to kill after he's already down.

 

There's this one Team Deathmatch I did that's a recreation of the Normandy Beach Landings. It's fantastic, one team starts on the mainland and one on an Island, there's a few Fighter jets but if only one team gets in them they're useless (I got first kill just by aiming my Heavy Sniper at a cockpit and guessing when someone would be getting in it). We were winning anyway but then that thing happened where the two teams kind of swap sides, so were were spawning on the beach while they spawned up on the hill (there's plenty of cover on both sides). One guy on their team swam all the way back to the Island to Snipe us in the back, but we were already up by 20 then. The title's in French, but the first word of it is Normandie. Do it if you can find it, it's great.

 

* If NOS stands for (k)Nowledge Of Slipsteaming, that would actually be accurate.

[Dolfan in NYC]

Apologies to Dan for accidentally signing out of XBL during the middle of his NXT live commentary.   

 

On the plus side Dan, you did sell me on the network, and I'm very tired right now because I had to stay up late to see Zayn/Cesaro  & Emma/Paige.  

[Cristobal]

Best. Troll Race. Ever.

 

No habla Inglise, Americano. One of those Spanish-speaking guys was in an East London Crew for some reason. I'm surprised you didn't win that. You've got NOS*.

Not that. I meant my 10 lap GTA on LS Forums the other night.

[jstout]

I was in the middle of a four-on-one beatdown of some poor goof who made the mistake of killing Misanthrope unprovoked - I never got a kill on him the whole time because everyone else was just takin' care of business - and Robert is sending me a Deathmatch invite every five seconds or so, it seemed, and I think he was doing it to crack me up because every other one was Prison Thugs.

 

He sent me one that was like RP GLITCH BLAH BLAH BLAH that I actually joined to see what its deal was, but by then he was already gone and the deathmatch was set for 30 minutes with no kil limit. I'm like "screw that, I don't care if it's a billion RP, not spending 30 minutes on a deathmatch."

 

I didn't know those long races also paid crap. I thought the point of the long races would be that they paid decent money. I don't have the patience for long races. Rockstar's gonna patch Coveted and Rooftop Rumble before it's over with, because they're bound to notice how people are doing those over and over again. Rooftop Rumble pays more in RP and slightly more in money ($750) than Coveted, but I think it's a bit harder. 

[RIPPA]

Yeah - Dolfan won the race in about 11 minutes and got 10K.

We saw that the Crew record was I think melraz or Misanthrope had done it in 10 minutes

 

1K a minute is not worth it

[The Man Known as Dan]

Apologies to Dan for accidentally signing out of XBL during the middle of his NXT live commentary.   

 

On the plus side Dan, you did sell me on the network, and I'm very tired right now because I had to stay up late to see Zayn/Cesaro  & Emma/Paige.  

 

Think nothing of it man, and to me, those 2 matches were worth teh 10 bucks this month, let alone the rest of the stuff I've watched.

[misanthrope304]

I'm not sure I ever was in a race for that long, although it is possible.  I think racing is how I ranked up to about lvl 20 or so, still need to win a few more for engine mods.

 

*as far as the network goes, works fine on my kindle, but my 360 has no-sold every sign in attempt. 

[jstout]

Yeah - Dolfan won the race in about 11 minutes and got 10K.

We saw that the Crew record was I think melraz or Misanthrope had done it in 10 minutes

 

1K a minute is not worth it

I came up with a "5-mile rule" - if the total race length (laps or point-to-point) is over 5 miles, I don't do it. I really like that four-way jumps one a lot, but someone wanted to do 10 laps on it last night, and I'm like "oh hell no."

 

I can't imagine doing a longer race due to the boredom factor. 

 

Rockstar should consider introducing another Super car that's similar in spec to the Adder and Entity just to give players a third option to think about - Super races are almost exclusively Adders and Entitys. Races are gonna get stupid to do if this NOS hack keeps spreading in popularity and the races basically divide into people who have cheated and people who haven't.

 

What's everyone's obsession with cheating anyway? I feel kinda weird gaming the system by playing well-paying missions over and over again, but that's not really cheating. Modifying cars to have something no one can buy is.

 

Oh, and Mis, if you need someone to finish second in some races so you can get more mods, lemme know. (That's kinda cheating, too, isn't it? Hilarious. You guys know what I mean, maybe.)

[RIPPA]

We did a super super short race last night that was around the arena that I wanna say was like less than a half mile.

 

The default setting was 3 laps and it was one of the rare times where I didn't think that was absurd

 

And I think we have all thrown races to each other. Heck that was the only way I was going to get any sort of air race wins.

[jstout]

Yeah, 3-5 laps in a one-mile race is fine. 3-5 laps in a two-mile race is pushing it. Even one lap in the around-the-prison race is one too many.

 

Throwing races to each other is taking advantage of the game as laid out - but that's nowhere near as bad as using flash drives and offline editing programs to give your car a speed boost people who don't do that kind of thing can't have.

 

Everyone also takes advantage of the deal where if you get a bounty on you in Freemode, you let a friend collect it. One guy I was gaming with last night couldn't pay his electric bill and mechanic's fee and I immediately threw a $9,000 bounty on his buddy standing next to him and gave him the ol' Daffy Duck "SHOOT HIM! SHOOT HIM!"

 

It bothers me that Rockstar never did anything about the people who are Level 800 or 1000 - you can't begin to tell me someone's earned that without cheating. They should've busted everybody down to 150, max, when they took everybody's money away and said "sorry" to all the people who had managed to get past Level 150 without cheating at that point.

 

I would believe probably 200 or 225 max, without cheating.

 

If anyone's a fan of the "get into people's houses" glitches, Rockstar said they fixed the Michael's house glitch, but it worked fine for me last night. So hilariously pointless.

[Travis Sheldon]

Also, can I just say how truly fitting it is that the Wedding Themed Deathmatch was won by a girl dressed all in White. Who's LoveMachine 1970? He moves like Nightcrawler and takes several shots to kill after he's already down.

 

 

 

 

Are you referring to a DM from a couple nights ago? If so, I am LoveMonster1970 and we were in the area around the church when everybody started to teleport. Thought it was just me. At the voting stage, after the DM was over, the next DM was chosen and I got dumped by the network.

[misanthrope304]

*Edit:  Geez, I was really bored at work, sorry about posting a novel here.*

 

Just had the best night of kicking ass on GTA5 yet for me.  Even better than the other night playing alongside Stout and Herby holding my own against three higher level players for about five minutes while they took a car in or something.  Two left and one asshole stayed long enough to die enough he went into passive mode and put a bounty on me, after calling mercs on me and sending a mugger after Stout (that I killed btw).

 

Started off the night in a private session playing Coveted solo, but for some reason couldn't get the game to let me set difficulty to Hard.  I got bored with this after a while and jumped into freemode, where I got an invite to coveted (this way I don't have to waste bullets ;-D). The three other guys were good enough, but upon discussing further we decided to play rooftop rumble (where they could put it on hard, a problem Robert and I were having). 

 

Anyway, I drop back into free mode in the middle of the city because Robert comes back on while I'm in the middle of doing Rooftop Rumble some more, and I have a bounty on me.  Two assholes in Sandking's come to collect, and I blow them both up (and their trucks) with Sticky Bombs while Robert races toward me to collect.  I head off up north and make it to Ron's Alternate Wind Farm with every cop in Los Santos hot on my trail after blowing up half the city with sticky bombs (there were cops involved also).  Robert makes it there in time to bust a cap in my ass, and the cops still impound my shit. 

 

At this time we notice there's an armored truck up around the northernmost town and take off after it.  I'm out of sticky bombs, needless to say.  After a short drive we roll up on the AC, and I drop a grenade at it's back door.  I blow it all to hell and now the cops are after us again. 

 

*At some point during all this Robert and I were trying to do Rooftop Rumble and get paid.

 

Anyway, we get away, and then I start blowing up cop cars again.  It's what I do, I blow shit up, mostly myself. 

 

Sometime or other, ACs start popping up on the same street as me, and I make about $200K total robbing those.

 

Not sure if I was in the same session, but there's a Simeon Car (SC) now on the map.  So I take off after it.  I get there and no one else is around, but there's a jackass closing in fast.  

 

This asshole blows up my Adder (but not me), and the SC with a grenade thrown from the freeway to the parking lot beside the dirt track. 

 

It is so on. 

 

First kill I get him with a Sticky Bomb thrown back up to the freeway from the parking lot. Life didn't get any easier for him after that.  When he spawned back he was in his personal vehicle and I already had a Buffalo rigged to blow.  He drives up and loses his ride and his life.  At this point I pull out the auto shotgun as he tries to flank me (spawned super close).  I was up in the cheap seats, drop down around the front of the building and circle in behind him as he made his way up the stairs.  He's looking around for me and I put two in his back.  Then I switched over to the carbine and dropped him twice off the respawn, then he spawned a little further down the track and got capped two more times from my sniper rifle.  He got into cover in the middle of the track and I switched back to the carbine for one more kill.  Having satisfied my blood lust, I walk away and call the insurance company to get my ride back.  At this point he puts a bounty on me.

 

Wrong move asshole.

 

I kill him three more times before someone else shows up looking to claim the bounty.  I'd taken my share of damage during the exchange, but the guy never killed me, so I'm barely alive when asshole #2 rolls up and finishes me off. 

 

He made the mistake of sticking his nose into my business, and subsequently died 3 times in a row before scurrying off with his tail between his legs.

 

I then steal a Baller, run over the original asshole and take it in for a quick $9k.  He rage quit.

 

Over the night, I take in 5 Baller's, stock my garage back up with Baller's (2), and killed a bunch of mother fuckers repeatedly.

 

Before I log off for the night I try to go to ammunation and stock back up on sticky bombs, ammo and get the MG I unlocked.  I roll in, and some asshat on a motorcycle starts creeping acting suspicious up so I bail in the Adder.  He goes into Ammunation and goes passive so I go back in and make the buys.  Before I go in though, I stick a bomb to his motorcycle to keep him honest.  I leave the area and when he gets on his ride it spontaneously combusts. 

 

He gets super pissed at this and calls in a tank so I'm like fuck this and go home.  I hang out for a few listening to the warzone outside my door. Go down to my garage and I get killed in my garage upon entry by an asshole with an rpg, thankfully he didn't blow up my cars.  I spawn somewhere downtown on top of his blip on the map, but he's still in my garage. He sends me a message from my garage saying he won't kill me anymore, but there's an asshole outside with a tank trying to bring the building down.  Tank asshole gets tired and dies and leaves.  So I head home in a stolen baller (which gives me a bounty) to store in my garage for later.  He kills me again with a shotty, and sends "sorry bro, bounty".

 

Hahahah, rank 107 DuffleBagBoi, your ass is mine now.  I play it cool, because I don't know the glitch he's using.  I bait him out into the open though, cuz by this time the room had cleared out and it's just the two of us.  He's killing a bunch of cops in a convenience store robbery gone horribly wrong, but eventually the numbers are too great and he succumbs to the LSPD.  He gets a car (the one that looks like a camaro/challenger) and takes it to the LSC in the center of town,  puts a real nice paint job on it too, I guess there were mods as well, but idk.  He doesn't have a mic it seems. 

 

He makes his way to Ammunation and I make my move.  I roll in nice and easy, blowing my horn outside to let him know I'm there.  On my way in I drop a present in the passenger seat of his spiffy new ride. 

 

You're out in the open now bitch, your ass is mine :-)

 

I stroll in and pick up a few sticky bombs to top off and a couple rounds for la pistola, salute, and head out.  See we had been sending messages back and forth, so he's none the wiser of my nefarious plot against his life.  I was all like hey man, cool glitch how'd you do that.  Blah Blah Blah, pat on the back, good job bro. 

 

I was patting him on the back to find the soft spot, because I'm a prick.  An evil prick.

 

It goes without saying that his car gets blown to hell with him in it.  I got him twice after that with my sniper rifle before I call in a night at 6am est.  When I get back to my apartment, I get a message from him saying "I didn't put insurance on the car, you're fucked now, better run I'm coming for you."

 

I replied:  "this makes me giggle"

 

and went to bed, watched the nxt ppv.  Damn good match from Cesaro and Zayn, best match I've seen in a long time, I wouldn't have minded if he pinned him after the roaring uppercut.  Emma has a nice ass, Paige, has a cool submission.  Hey there is too cool.  *asleep*

Edited March 2, 2014 by misanthrope304

[jstout]

That sounded like fun.

 

God, I had a blast the other night when Mis and I and two of my friends were in the same game together, and some poor bastard killed Mis unprovoked without thinking that the three guys around him might actually be allies.

 

"Target acquired."

 

I never got a kill on the guy all night long because by the time I'd get him in my scope, he'd get killed by someone else. Every time. He went in passive mode and someone killed him with the fire truck. Not a good night for dude. He hit the road after what must have been 15 kills in a row, minimum.

 

I just imagine the dudes in this situation thinking they're all Captain Cool for killing another player in the game unprovoked, then realizing that actions occasionally have consequences.  

 

Edit: As I said before, some nights you're the hammer, some nights you're the nail, and I starred as The World's Biggest Nail all night long tonight. I just continually got my ass handed to me in the most demoralizing fashions possible. I got a few lucky sniper kills in, but that was it. Not good.

[melraz09]

That must make me king cool cause I'll kill people unprovoked all the time.....Actually I'm just a dickhead.