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Gosh you guys don't understand the Crossfit life, you do things just because you can! (see kipping pullups).

 

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I love the fact that one of Nikki's friends, who has probably never met Cena, quickly figures out that he is very much a politician in every answer he gives. It was the polite way of saying "this guy is a f*cking robot."

 

It's also why he's the absolute face of the company - the man cannot be flustered, even with ten angry ex-Hooters waitresses grilling him.

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Cena was great in that scene. But allow me to defend his robot-ness for a moment. I'm also a guy who doesn't want kids. And when you make that known, you get asked "Why?" at least once a day. I imagine it's a hell of a lot more for Cena even. So he's had plenty of chances to perfect his answer.

Eva Marie's Mom saying, "If you get a divorce, you'll never step foot in this house again" was worse than anything her Dad or brothers said. Actually, I can't imagine a much worse thing a parent could say. Fuck her.

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Everyone is sleeping on the fact that Eva Marie's real name is Natalie Nelson, with brothers Nathan and Neil!

Guess Nattie's higher on the totem pole than Eve was

I figure Eva Marie was based in Eve Marie Torres.

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It's the little things that make this show.

 

John Cena working a "Quite Frankly" into his promo to Nikki's friends.

 

Random shot of Fandango oiling himself up backstage, that was slightly longer than the usual flash cut filler on this show.

 

The long scene with Steph sitting there playing the progressively drunker voicemails left by Nattie and both of their facial expressions as it played out was great, though.

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Hey, it's that match Meltzer said was made to punish Eva Marie and I said was probably just put together so E could clip what they needed out of it to showcase her which is exactly what it was.  I liked when she questioned how her family couldn't see how in love she was.  Probably, because her emotional range consists of the one blank expression.  Her father's speaking cadence is amazing, he's like a cartoon character.  Their house is amazing too.  There's not much to the front yard but then there's a huge backyard with a pool and a big deck and a fruit basket made out of a watermelon.

 

The reactions to the panties voicemail killed me.

 

I thought Cena's arm was hurt, not his legs.  Run, fool, even as awkwardly as you do, run.  You're supposed to use your FU money to keep those meddlesome yaks out of your house and away from your girl so they can't fill her head up with marriage and baby thoughts and then you go and do the opposite.  What a maroon.

 

Nikki is by far the funniest member of the cast.  During the first episode she said how dare WWE hire someone who looks like her and now with her saying she makes all the sacrifices in the relationship.  She's hilarious.

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idk.. Daniel Bella doesn't quite have the ring to it as Brie Bryan? haha

 

 

I love the show. I think it is funny that most wrestling fans don't want to acknowledge that the show is way more successful than anyone could imagine.

 

 

But I think there's too many damn people trying to get some focus. The Bellas have been consistently the focus of the episodes sans a few times Nattie's whiny ass wants some attention. Noami and Cameron have had their moments. Don't know what the fuck Eva brings besides a pair of tits and JoJo has gone missing. idk. Just remain it The Bellas Shows ft John Cena, Daniel Bryan, and Josie.

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Natalya seems to be the Ed Helms of the show.  I'm guessing a lot of her stuff is staged, like the phone calls.  But it was a pretty fun moment.  And at least it gives her a character type beyond "snap, snap, head tilt, nuh-uh, snap!"

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Yeah, I don't get the DB crazy the internet has for the guy, but I love him on the show. I think it is refreshing to see a couple like DB and Brie in which they are actually in love and don't need to fight all the damn time. So jealous. The show also made me wish Brie could cut promos in front of a live crowd. Her telling Nikki to fuck off with being jealous of Eva was way more empowering than the AJ pipebomb done a week later:

 

 

 

But the bias towards any diva not named AJ and/or looks like a woman is strong. idk

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It's probably better for the show if Cena and Nikki split and he gets with another cast member. Laundry hamper-rants aside, they aren't that compelling to watch and  I don't know how many conversations we can sit through in which Cena tells Nikki he can't commit and she pouts for a while before eventually deciding to stay with him anyway. At some point it's, like, hey, you two want drastically different things. Split up, move on before things get messy. 

 

Maybe he can get with Eva (after she gets sick of the fitness-obsessed hoodie guy and dumps him) and then she brings him home to her family. thinking they'll love him..and they still mock and ridicule the shit out of him. Maybe Eva's mom can kick him out of the house after she discovers he's been divorced.

 

Of course, I realize these are real people and real-life relationships we're talking about, but if Cena is the company guy he claims to be, he should totally be willing to let E! writers dictate every aspect of his personal life.

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Of course, I realize these are real people and real-life relationships we're talking about, but if Cena is the company guy he claims to be, he should totally be willing to let E! writers dictate every aspect of his personal life.

He's probably waiting until they turn him heel for the time to be right for him to dump Nikki.

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For the record, WWE were apparently trying for years to get E! to pick up a reality show with the Divas. They kept saying no, till WWE mentioned Nikki being with Cena, at which point they decided to give it a go.

 

So, yeah. Cena is pretty integral to the whole thing. I could easily see a situation where he splits with Nikki and they try to find some way to keep him on the show.

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