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Jesus, I think the latest group to turn on Sting was WWE Creative. Guy goes from looking like the most badass "vigilante" in wrestling one week, to basically begging for work in a promo the next week.

It's okay though!  It's all right.  Everything is all right.  He has finally won the battle against himself!  He Loves Vince McMahon/WWE. :)

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I feel bad for Byron - he was clearly told to go out and sell shock and confusion, but that was way too long a stretch to be a solo announcer who isn't supposed to sound excited or energetic because his colleagues just got Borked.

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Yeah.  He was told to go stand in Booker T's corpse outline and keep the show going.  There were literally six or seven dead people littering the ground around him.  He had just seen a man folded into a paper airplane.

 

Of course Lawler went out there and was like "YEAH! BYRON>>>>WHOOO!!PUPPIESBABAY!!!"

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"Ladies and Gentlemen, if anyone is out there in the area and is willing to make a donation, we are told that Michael Cole is in need of the following:

- blood tranfusion

- total Bone replacement,

- Intraneckular marrow transplant,

- between four and five lungs (not for breathing, he won't be doing that anymore, but just to ground up into a paste for him to lick as an oxygen substitute).

- a new tongue capable of processing lung goo

- a car made out of gauze

- reversal of gravity

- a warm bowl of stem cell soup

- a titanium alloy endoskeleton with rubber skin (used is fine if in reasonable condition)

- teeth

Michael Cole has been given his last rites and his family has said their goodbyes. I'm on my way to the hospital to pick up the body and take it to the funeral home to embalm him.

 

 

Ooh!  Can we do a funeral pyre?  Or a Viking funeral?

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For WWE Network, I want a Russian cartoon based on the adventures of Rusev and the tank.  Something like the Russian cartoon from Family Guy.

 

"RUSEV UND TANK.  ONE IS MAN.  ONE IS MACHINE.  BOTH CRUSH."

 

Cartoon shorts as bumpers with Brock chasing after Rollins through a variety of places and terrain.

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Cole really does need to off tv for at least a few weeks...

 

Well, first he needs to get off life support. Then they need to figure out how to interpret his Metallica One-Man head movements into language.  Then we'll see.

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"Ladies and Gentlemen, if anyone is out there in the area and is willing to make a donation, we are told that Michael Cole is in need of the following:

- blood tranfusion

- total Bone replacement,

- Intraneckular marrow transplant,

- between four and five lungs (not for breathing, he won't be doing that anymore, but just to ground up into a paste for him to lick as an oxygen substitute).

- a new tongue capable of processing lung goo

- a car made out of gauze

- reversal of gravity

- a warm bowl of stem cell soup

- a titanium alloy endoskeleton with rubber skin (used is fine if in reasonable condition)

- teeth

Michael Cole has been given his last rites and his family has said their goodbyes. I'm on my way to the hospital to pick up the body and take it to the funeral home to embalm him.

Ooh! Can we do a funeral pyre? Or a Viking funeral?

Fortunately, Stephanie has been kind enough to donate the set from The Funeral Parlor. She's not all bad afterall.

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For WWE Network, I want a Russian cartoon based on the adventures of Rusev and the tank.  Something like the Russian cartoon from Family Guy.

 

"RUSEV UND TANK.  ONE IS MAN.  ONE IS MACHINE.  BOTH CRUSH."

 

Cartoon shorts as bumpers with Brock chasing after Rollins through a variety of places and terrain.

 

 

Shorts of Brock and Rusev fighting each other at kaiju-scale throughout America and Russia.

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That announce table weighs infinity pounds.  It crushed two men.  The one man who could tip it back in place was thrown out of the building.  So it remained tipped over.  I assume they'll have to get a crane in there to move it out of the building.  Or it might just be a permanent fixture in that arena from now on. 

 

How awkward did Lawler and Saxton have to feel just standing behind a table tipped at 45 degrees? 

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Fun Crowd and insanely fun first hour. It really died after Brock killed everyone. You put this show in front of the usual RAW crowd and it's kind of a dud. 

That Cena/Ambrose match was a train-wreck. It may be the worst match to get that much time on regular WWE TV all year.

 

This crowd will take some flak for those chants at the divas and deservedly slow. Try not to make yourself out to be the mom's basement dweller stereotypes, guys.

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