Curt McGirt Posted September 19, 2014 Posted September 19, 2014 Oh yeah, if you're watching Dolemite tonight and haven't seen it, I dare you to drink something when the scene outside with the boom mic dropping into frame occurs. You will be spraying it everywhere. Or any of the fight sequences, for that matter.
piranesi Posted September 19, 2014 Posted September 19, 2014 Well, if this is the place to brag about an entire night's lineup, then I can hang, brothers. Here's what I get tonight on Hallmark: 7:00 - 9:00: When a high school principal (Fred Savage) is out of his depth, he turns to the one person who can help restore order to the troubled students by teaching them the power of dance. Tyne Daley stars in: PRINCIPAL GRANDMA! 9:00-11:00 A mother delves into the dangerous culture of the internet in an attempt to prevent tragedy. Lyndsay Wagner in, MOTHER, MAY I PLANK WITH DANGER? 11:00-3:00 Hallmark after-hours live!: DEEPAK CHOPRA'S CELEBRITY SLUMBER PARTY (guests include Malcolm Gladwell, Michael Ironside, Vicky Lawrence; Musical guest, one of the guys from Strawberry Alarm Clock) Also, fuck you guys so hard. 3
Brian Fowler Posted September 19, 2014 Posted September 19, 2014 So, hey, I did finish Season One of From Dusk Til Dawn. Nice to see it get a bit away from the movie's plot here and there. Also, it's like halfway through they suddenly realized they were on a network that allowed nudity and cursing. It was weird. Also also... I still hate you all that have EL REY. EDIT: I swear, Pira's latest "fuck you" was posted while I was typing this. But I co-sign.
Curt McGirt Posted September 19, 2014 Posted September 19, 2014 On Saturday, in a row: Dirty Ho Heroes of the East 36th Chamber of Shaolin BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA...
nate Posted September 19, 2014 Posted September 19, 2014 Fuck El Rey; this thread is all about Piranesi's Hallmark and Lifetime viewing.
Curt McGirt Posted September 20, 2014 Posted September 20, 2014 Switchblade Sisters on Grindhouse Friday next week. Meanwhile, piranesi is watching "Very Special Episode" marathons of Family Matters on Oxygen.
piranesi Posted September 20, 2014 Posted September 20, 2014 Switchblade Sisters on Grindhouse Friday next week. Meanwhile, piranesi is watching "Very Special Episode" marathons of Family Matters on Oxygen. I made a transcript from last night: Hi, everyone. I'm Jaleel White. Now, we all like to laugh at Urkel's antics. But to start off tonight's show I'm taking off the funny glasses for a moment. Tonight, we present you a chance to think about something very important and to open a discussion with your own family, much like we will with our t.v. family. There's been a lot of talk in the news lately about coke cans and pubic hair. And your kids may have questions. These are difficult conversations to have. But we all know that sometimes pubic hairs end up on cokes. And sometimes, bitches need to shut up about it. So tonight, on a very special episode of FAMILY MATTERS, we feature the honorable Supreme Court nominee Clarence Thomas in a story we're calling: "Did I do that? Yeah, I prolly did that. But no reason to make a big fuss about it. It would only hurt us both." 3
Curt McGirt Posted September 30, 2014 Posted September 30, 2014 LUCHA UNDERGROUND OCTOBER 29TH ABOUT FUCKING TIME
Bustronaut Posted September 30, 2014 Posted September 30, 2014 Now if only it would show up as an actual channel on xfinity.
Brian Fowler Posted September 30, 2014 Posted September 30, 2014 LUCHA UNDERGROUND OCTOBER 29TH ABOUT FUCKING TIME Fuck. You. All.
Curt McGirt Posted September 30, 2014 Posted September 30, 2014 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lucha_Underground Anybody know if any of the young talent is any good? We got Blue Demon Jr., Chavito, and Sexy Star and I know literally no one else on that list. And then have Konnan... and Vampiro... and Matt Striker... ugh. Actually this is a better question for the lucha forum
J.T. Posted September 30, 2014 Author Posted September 30, 2014 LUCHA UNDERGROUND OCTOBER 29TH ABOUT FUCKING TIME But it will be shitty AAA with Konnan and Vampiro. I am torn..
J.T. Posted October 1, 2014 Author Posted October 1, 2014 But... Sexy Star. You may have a point there. 1
J.T. Posted October 1, 2014 Author Posted October 1, 2014 Well shit. We have the El Rey premiers of Bells of Death and Ten Tigers From Kwangtung today! FUCK YEAH~! There will be a replay of Ten Tigers tomorrow on Flying Five Finger One Armed Eight Pole Shaolin Exploding Death Touch Thursdays along with The Master of Kung Fu (has just enough camp to land it in the So Horrible That It Is Awesome category) and the totally badass, Clan of Amazons!
J.T. Posted October 2, 2014 Author Posted October 2, 2014 Ten Tigers of Kwangtung is fucking awesome. El Rey needs to put Kung Fu Commandos aka The Incredible Kung Fu Mission in rotation immediately.
nate Posted October 2, 2014 Posted October 2, 2014 But... Sexy Star. You may have a point there. I have a point here ... sweet jeezus ...
OSJ Posted October 2, 2014 Posted October 2, 2014 Tonight should be awesome. Ten Tigers is one of the classics. El Rey needs to find a copy of Death Mask of the Ninja stat, (yes, there's no ninjas, and no death-mask, but it's an absolutely great film.)
Curt McGirt Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I missed most of these but Clan of the White Lotus is on right now and started with a Pei Mei battle so I have to watch at least some of it. I presume it's as good as most of what's shown? EDIT: WELL IT DIDN'T TAKE VERY FUCKING LONG TO FIGURE THAT ONE OUT
piranesi Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I can't imagine why you guys would be wasting your time on stuff like that when Hallmark just bought the rights to (finally) rebroadcast one of the greatest minis-series ever made which hasn't been seen since its historic initial run in 1991: From "The Guide" HLMRK: Friday 9:00-11:00 - (Part 1 of 3) A young Laura Ingalls Wilder (Soleil Moon-Frye) deals with her awakening womanhood while struggling to uncover the sinister plot behind a plague of addictive corn-maize being pushed by a shadowy Methodist conglomerate in MICHAEL LANDON'S TekWar: 1882 4
J.T. Posted October 3, 2014 Author Posted October 3, 2014 I missed most of these but Clan of the White Lotus is on right now and started with a Pei Mei battle so I have to watch at least some of it. I presume it's as good as most of what's shown? EDIT: WELL IT DIDN'T TAKE VERY FUCKING LONG TO FIGURE THAT ONE OUT That movie fucking rules. There needs to be a Pei Mei marathon. There are like a billion movies with Wong Fei-Hung as the hero and a billion more with Pei Mei as the bad guy. Pei Mei's villainous image in movies pretty much began the "the guy with the white beard is the badass" and "the pale / albino dude is the usually villain" martial arts tropes.
nate Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 What movies exist where Pei Mai is a character? A Google search yields *many* references to "Kill Bill;" I want more than just that.
J.T. Posted October 3, 2014 Author Posted October 3, 2014 Off the top of my head, IIRC he appears as either a minor character or a major villain in Executioners From Shaolin, the previously mentioned Clan of the White Lotus, Shaolin Abbot, and the Invincible Kung Fu Brothers. There are undoubtedly a shitload of other movies where he makes an appearance.
Curt McGirt Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I like how he's this insane Special Final Boss where you have to use multiple methods of kung-fu and special strategies to knock him off. Gotta go for that top knot, son! Also the fact that he can RETRACT HIS GENITALIA to sucker in people who try and go for the nuts, trapping their leg and using it to beat on 'em. 1
nate Posted October 3, 2014 Posted October 3, 2014 I like how he's this insane Special Final Boss where you have to use multiple methods of kung-fu and special strategies to knock him off. Gotta go for that top knot, son! Also the fact that he can RETRACT HIS GENITALIA to sucker in people who try and go for the nuts, trapping their leg and using it to beat on 'em. Which movie was that? My brain keeps wanting to tell me it was Born Invincible ... but I know better; yet it's like being told not to think of pink elephants.
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