The Cricket Thread, Mark 2

[GuerrillaMonsoon]

Didn't rate the Bairstow dismissal at all.

When you compare it to mankad, at least the non-striker is attempting to gain a competitive edge. Bairstow wasn't attempting to take a run or gain any advantage. Feels very much against the spirit of the game. Also triggered - got out in a similar fashion in my last game - got hit on the hip, instinctively jogged toward square leg to try and shake it off and got run out.

Don't really like the race to the bottom to see who can be the biggest cunt. The rules of the game are largely written with a view to interpretation and played within the Spirit of the Game, whatever that means to anyone, but that is becoming less and less common. Don't like that Australia do it AND still insist on having the moral high ground on lecturing the rest of the world on it.

[Goitre]

Aussies are "cheats" and "cunts"? Not, "Bairstow fucked up"?

Abrogation of personal responsibility, indeed.

"Spirit of the Game"? W.G Grace was the original cheating cunt, 150 years ago. Bodyline was another example of the British spirit of the game. What a nebulous, farcical concept.

[DangerMark]

Ahh well, I hope we're all ready for the thirty overs per day max from the now obligatory thirty seconds of silly buggers between the batter and the keeper whilst the bowlers get their breath back from constantly steaming in to fling it a billion miles an hour at a spot halfway between them and the crease.

[Goitre]

29 minutes ago, DangerMark said:

the now obligatory thirty seconds of silly buggers between the batter and the keeper

You're half-serious, at least, aren't you? For one, Carey threw it almost the second it hit his gloves. For two, no, most people aren't dumb enough to leave their crease constantly, which gave Carey the idea, and certainly not leave their crease before the umpire calls "over". You're acting like this is the first time anything like this has ever happened and the sky is falling; it happens every ball in every form and level of cricket. You don't leave your crease. Again, under 12 stuff.

The "silly bugger" was Broad, with his exaggerated piss-taking inciting the crowd. The dumb fuck was Bairstow. 

Edit: Just saw Bairstow attempted the exact thing himself, two days earlier. Fer feck's sake.  Spirit of the Game.

Edited July 3, 2023 by Goitre
Watching the news

[GuerrillaMonsoon]

11 hours ago, Goitre said:

Aussies are "cheats" and "cunts"? Not, "Bairstow fucked up"?

Abrogation of personal responsibility, indeed.

"Spirit of the Game"? W.G Grace was the original cheating cunt, 150 years ago. Bodyline was another example of the British spirit of the game. What a nebulous, farcical concept.

Why are they mutually exclusive?

[DangerMark]

8 hours ago, Goitre said:

You're half-serious, at least, aren't you?

2%, max. I don't even take things that deserve it more than 5%.

[Goitre]

12 hours ago, GuerrillaMonsoon said:

Why are they mutually exclusive?

I'm not the one excluding Bairstow. I'm excluding cheating.

[DangerMark]

England finally get a win over the Upside Down: England Women win by 3 runs, and they only had to put up 186 to do it. Ellyse Perry was handed the strike needing three sixes from the last three, and she only got two of them, although I was still biting my nails at the end praying for legal deliveries. There have been enough extras already. (https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/66097255)    

[The Natural]

Australia 91-4 at lunch. 26 overs. England won the toss and chose to bowl.

[Cleavy]

ugh, relying on Mitch Marsh.  I feel so dirty!

[DangerMark]

Seems to have done the trick though, he went full Baz Ball on England for a-run-a-ball 118 to save the tourists's innings after an iffy start.

Incidentally, 118 is the number of times I've watched Khawaja's dismissal.

[The Natural]

240-5 at tea. Dropped catches again by England. Marsh dropped on 12 by Root reaches century off 102 balls. Bairstow drops Smith on four and Head on nine.

[The Natural]

Knocked my radio off at the wrong time, bugger:

It's become "shoes off if you hate Carey" now.

Adults in the crowd are holding up their shoes.

"If you hate Carey stand up," sing the England fans. Quite a lot of them do.

The England fans are singing "stand up if you hate Carey".

"Same old Aussies, always cheating" is going round Headingley too.

[DangerMark]

Let's focus on the positives. This thread's second favourite Mark, (Wood, natch,) has decided that he won't trust it to the fielding: Bowls Starc, catches Cummins with his leg where it shouldn't be and England now look like they might bat tonight without Australia pulling the Big Brain Declaration Strat.

[The Natural]

Pat Cummins out for a duck!

[The Natural]

Mark Wood 5-34. Australia out for 263!

[DangerMark]

He does that again in the second, and we can promote him to the Thread's Favourite Mark, I won't mind.

[The Natural]

Australia 263 all out. 142-7 England but thanks to Stokes 80 and Wood 24 off 8 balls, England are 237 all out.

[The Natural]

22 hours ago, DangerMark said:

He does that again in the second, and we can promote him to the Thread's Favourite Mark, I won't mind.

Wood 24 off 8 balls. To quote Raven, what a mark.

[The Natural]

11-1 Australia. Broad gets Warner out again for 1. As day follows night. 17th time Broad has dismissed Warner.

Edited July 7, 2023 by The Natural

[DangerMark]

3 hours ago, The Natural said:

Wood 24 off 8 balls. To quote Raven, what a mark.

Not a man who does anything slowly.

[Cleavy]

8 hours ago, The Natural said:

Wood 24 off 8 balls. To quote Raven, what a mark.

dumbest tactics by our bowlers, just needed to bowl it full at his stumps since he was backing away to leg to play the short ball

[DangerMark]

Both of England's senior Cricket teams are in Win or Bust mode: the Men need 224 in whatever play actually happens tomorrow and Monday with all ten wickets intact - Crawley and Duckett made it through five overs - whilst the Women won a rain-shortened T20 in the last over. Three more games to win each; the Women can afford a non-result, but the Men cannot.

This has not be dull in the slightest bit.

[odessasteps]

From afar, the idea of both teams playing concurrently seems an odd choice. 

[SirFozzie]

1 hour ago, DangerMark said:

Both of England's senior Cricket teams are in Win or Bust mode: the Men need 224 in whatever play actually happens tomorrow and Monday with all ten wickets intact - Crawley and Duckett made it through five overs - whilst the Women won a rain-shortened T20 in the last over. Three more games to win each; the Women can afford a non-result, but the Men cannot.

This has not be dull in the slightest bit.

Yeah, if you just looked at the score, you'd think that this is pre-BazBall, but considering there was no play today until 5 local, there was plenty of time for wickets and runs. If England fail to win this, you're going to see all the old fuddy duddies come out of the woodwork and claim "BazBall is a fad! It's over! Practice your forward defensive strokes for 9 hours a day!".