Rampage - 5/19/2023

[tbarrie]

27 minutes ago, JLowe said:

The thing is that an unstoppable face is fucking boring and doesn’t draw. 

I don't know if that's a universal rule. Goldberg drew pretty well, didn't he?

[HarryArchieGus]

Super fun BCC v Best Amigos opener. Claudio continues to be somewhat quietly one of the best performers in the company over the past number of months. Bandido continues to impress with whatever time he’s given. I think we might need a little Yuta v Trent TV program? Maybe in ROH to give it a little more shine? Also, very interested in what a Yuta v Bandido match would look like. Good Kyle Fletcher promo. Fletcher can already kinda talk on top of his undeniable in-ring capabilities. A fantastic last 12 months or so for the young Ozzie. And he and Davis v FTR is easily my dreamiest of dream bouts for Forbidden Door. Jade Cargill v Job Squad had some patchy looking edits, but nicely showcased Psycho Sid Cargill. Taya v Jade is not a match I’m excited about paying for, but I’m totally down for them as a Rampage Main Event. The Acclaimed v Varsity Athletes was fun. Last few weeks, and especially in front of this fucking awesome Austin crowd, shout out to @JLowe, has made Anthony/Ass/Caster a hot little item again. Strange we're still not getting any sell from anybody about them going after the trios title. Nese and Woods were particularly good in this match enhancing their superstar counterparts. I wonder if Woods will ever break out of this low card stable? He looks better and better each time out. I'd certainly welcome an ROH push for the Nese-Woods team. QTV brightens my day, and I wish for it to do the same for yours. Hardy Boys talk segment was a fuck of lot better than last week's awful entry, so no complaints. Ethan Page was an excellent foil there. The Asses worked their part just fine. I’m into this trios pair off, but again, I think this is more suited for a TV broadcast than a PAY per view. Cole-Jericho segment was pretty alright. I’m digging Jericho in this feud. I’m no hater, I dig Bay Bay, but this is easily my favorite Adam Cole pairing thus far in his AEW run. That said, the hockey fight looked fackin' weak. It's something I’d love to see Jericho scratch from his arsenal. Dustin Rhodes v Kaun was fine. Dustin was really good here. Good enough for this to have been a lot better than it ended up. Kaun has good fundamentals, but fails to bring much personality to the mix. His missed splash late in the bout was laughably bad. Speaking of laughably bad, Keith Lee and Swerve, two guys I love, continue to meander in this rotten never ending shitty feud. Both of these guys badly need to move on. I'd really really like to see Brian Cage grow out his hair, go blonde, and try on the Superstar persona. Pretty fun Ram'pidge!  

[JLowe]

1 hour ago, tbarrie said:

I don't know if that's a universal rule. Goldberg drew pretty well, didn't he?

Hard to say, he was definitely the hottest angle during his build even though he wasn't main eventing until he finally reached his title shot, and even after he still kind of took a backseat to the NWO stuff (which was part of the problem with WCW at that time). Him finally losing, and in the way he did, definitely killed some of his aura. Jade was interesting when she was building and starting to meet higher level opponents, and they may have already missed their Goldberg-Hogan moment with her.

I was done with WWE and wrestling before he showed up there.

[Octopus]

Jade would be no match for ABADDON!!!!11!1!

After we get a random hardcore match with Mickie Knuckles.

——-

I am very WCW ignorant. Especially the NWO-Goldberg-Crow Sting main event period. As a WWF-only kid I still find that all icky WCW (but respected the video game). Watching the undercard is fantastic and pre-Hogan is fun though and a revelation to discover years after the fact.

[zendragon]

Goldberg is what not to do , they could have had him drop the belt to DDP but they have to give that moment Nash who didn’t need it. 
 

They really should have a DDP in the wings for Jade but they don’t 

mob a similar note I don’t think Brock needed to go over Taker but WWE has a problem creating stars ( no one bigger than the brand ethos) 

Could do Hayter v Jade. Immovable object v unstoppable force

[JLowe]

Sorry, here's part 3 of my road report, for Rampage:

Spoiler

After this, they take their time getting things set up for Rampage, so I use the time to head back to concessions. I’m feeling a little frisky by now, so I pick up a Voodoo Ranger Hazy IPA (the 7.5 abv) for Rampage. Back in my seat and things are still moving slowly, no way this is done anywhere close to 10 Austin time.

Finally, Justin Roberts is back and introducing the announcers for Rampage. Of course, good ol’ JR gets booed mercilessly for being a Sooner and having Boomer Sooner as his theme, but he waves at the crowd anyway. Then, as if once wasn’t enough, Fozzy blasts over the sound system AGAIN for another full play as Chris Jericho is introduced.

Mark Sterling is out with The Varsity Athletes and Ari Daivari. One of the anti-Playaz says that Josh Woods is a newer guy but getting pretty good and I did all I could to keep myself from turning around and reminding them he was a fucking RoH Pure Champion. But then my mood goes from 0 to 100 as the beat drops and it’s THE ACCLAIMED! I got video of Caster’s rap, he makes a reference to Greg Abbott that might get him a short suspension and definitely a reprimand. It’s one of those situations where someone as venal and awful as Abbott doesn’t deserve any kind of sympathy whatsoever but you can't make jokes about his disability (even though Greg Abbott doesn’t give a shit about disables Texans and literally also voted to cap lawsuit settlements at a level lower than his own from his accident).

Like many recent Acclaimed trios matches, it’s mostly fan service and I was happily served. One thing about having them on Rampage is that it allows the Acclaimed a lot of post-match time to interact with the crowd; it also allowed Billy Gunn to do his famous DX catchphrase without getting in trouble on air. The Gen Z girl in front of me who was vaping weed all night and wearing a DX “Suck It” shirt that was before she was born perked up for that bit.

Next we get a local enhancement woman who I don’t recognize, because it’s time for another episode of “Who will Jade squash”. Three moves and it’s over. Sterling says “We want more than that” and another local enhancement worker comes out. Pretty sure Jade legit hurt her with a spear. Anyway, the fans are loving it, I’m not, and then Sterling calls for another. A third jobber starts walking out but then (shocking no one) Taya Valkryie’s music hits, she hits the jobber, runs to the ring, and attacks Jade, culminating in a whatever she calls the Jaded. Thank merciful Jesus it’s over, and that we got a good women’s trios dark match.

At this point, they hit the pyro and introduction for Rampage and BCC starts making their way to the ring, entering at floor level below and left of my seats. I bought them originally thinking I had a good chance of being by Moxley’s entrance, unfortunately being above floor level meant all I got to do was watch. I cheered, the anti-Playaz talked about how much Yuta sucks and how much they hate Moxley. They get to the ring and we get Best Friends music (I was wearing my Best Friends shirt from All Elite Crate so severely conflicted here) and Trent, Chuck, and Bandido make their way to the ring, announced as Best Amigos.

While we didn’t get any ridiculously wild lucha spots, we did get exactly what would be expected, which is an excellent match highlighted by some Bandido spots with Claudio, some ass beatings, some triple-teaming, and Best Amigos Giving the People What they Want!

Somewhere in here (I’m going by my photos and some spoiler sites, I don’t remember exact orders) we get the Hardyz (with people going crazy for the theme song) and Brother Zay doing an in-ring promo when Ethan Page interrupts and tries to get back into their good graces. It’s fine, ready for the angle to end and wondering how they’re going to give the Hardyz their title run that was aborted by Jeff’s troubles and what they’ll do next with All Ego.

Justin Roberts calls Miles down to ringside, so that Miles can let everyone now “And now, it’s time for the main event”.

It’s Bishop Kaun (with Prince Nana). It’s The Natural Dustin Rhodes (with Keith Lee briefly), getting a huge hometown pop!! It’s a hoss fight and I AM HERE FOR IT! It’s a good back and forth, Dustin really goes all out to make Kaun look like a star and naturally (pun intended) blades himself a decent gusher. Do we get the drop-down punch? You bet we do! Do we get a huge powerslam? Fuck yes! How about a bulldog? You know it! And then finally a finisher and a win.

Brian Cage attacks and most of the Embassy beat on Dustin before Limitless Keith Lee comes down to even the odds and get a huge home state pop (I think he also did a lot of Austin indies before WWE) although they did get a beatdown thanks to Swerve.

Post-match and beatdown (and not filmed), Dustin gets on the mike and thanks everyone. He then gives the mic to Keith Lee, who says that last time he was here he mentioned a friend of his who was fighting stage 4 colon cancer (small Fuck Cancer chant). Well, treatments worked and his friend was in the audience, and Lee brings him to the ring for a big hug and I’m trying to hold back tears because it’s a happy story and also his friend is openly rocking a colostomy bag and I think of how my wife, who has an ileostomy and a full colectomy, would feel seeing a proud ostomate. Dustin is back to tell us all that he’s having a lot of fun and he’s not ready to call it quits yet, which gets a pop. And then his final words “Hook ‘em fucking Horns”.

I hit the restroom one more time, and decide to walk a little way from the arena to see if I can get a rideshare without waiting 20-30 minutes at the pick-up area, and also just to clear my head and get some exercise. Two different Lyft’s blow me off at the last minute, so I’m tempted to say fuck it and walk downtown to one of my favorite dive bars for a couple of cold, cheap beers. But I decide better and finally get a pickup at 11:25 and home by 11:45, tired as hell. I drink about a quart of water while I tell my lovely wife about everything, relieved that she didn’t end up needing to go to a hospital, and finally turned in around 1 am, sleeping until 10:30 Thursday.

 

Edited May 22, 2023 by JLowe

[Gorman]

2 hours ago, JLowe said:

Taya Valkryie’s music hits, she hits the jobber, runs to the ring, and attacks Jade, culminating in a whatever she calls the Jaded.

Road to Valhalla!

[Shartnado]

Big win for Dustin in Texas. You know, this is what Dusty should have done at 34 years into his career. Teaming up with someone cooler, having tough fights against younger more muscular opponents in the main event, bleeding and overcoming the odds!

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What?

I guess I mean beating someone like Konga The Barbarian on tv or PPV would be more appropriate than pinning Lex Luger or other aspiring heel main eventers. Although, there weren't THAT many of those aside from the Horsemen. That being said, I wouldn't mind Dustin putting his career on the line for one last shot at MJF's title somewhere down the line, though.