Grand Theft Auto V Talk.

[jstout]

I suck at movie references 'cause I pretty much never watch movies, but "get to the choppa!" pops up very quick whenever a helicopter is involved.

We're highly likely to break into Foghorn Leghorn references at any moment during a game. I also never fail to think of Jim Ross saying "Stone Cold! Stone Cold!" whenever a crew member runs in from out of nowhere to save the day.

Oh, when carjacking an NPC, I always think of officer Cartman's "step out of the car, please."

[melraz09]

Yallright, I'm lookin through the challenges and there's one called Flippin hell. I just have 3 completed. I know I've flipped my car a shit ton more than that. Is there somethin special ya gotta do?

[J.T.]

I have no idea what the hell you're supposed to do to get credit for the Flippin' Hell or Spinderella medals.  I have wiped out down on side of the entire Chiatski Mountain Range with my Mesa Off-Road and have only gotten Silver medal completion of Flippin' Hell.

 

Fuck, man.  We literally rolled all the way Mount Gordo the other day in your white Coquette.  You shoulda got Platinum credit for that shit.

[RIPPA]

I think both Flippin Hell and Spinderella are something like "5 rotations" to get it to count

 

going ass over tea kettle is way harder for me than doing Spinderellas

 

The easiest way to get it is to drive a car out the back of a flying cargobob

[J.T.]

The easiest way to get it is to drive a car out the back of a flying cargobob

 

So THAT's what those assholes were up to last night while I was watching WEAZEL.

 

I also watched some tard beat on cars with a nightstick.  Didn't have the heart to PM him and let him know that particular Strength building tactic was patched for GTA Online so that it doesn't work anymore..  Ya gotta play sports and 6 set epics in Tennis builds muscle very nicely... provided you find an opponant that doesn't quit out on game point during the very first game.

[Robert C]

If somebody wants to build up their strength, easiest way is just to do unarmed only DMs.  There are a shit ton of them out there - about half the random ones I get end up being those.  They're boring of course, but you can increase your strength really quickly,

[J.T.]

If somebody wants to build up their strength, easiest way is just to do unarmed only DMs.  There are a shit ton of them out there - about half the random ones I get end up being those.  They're boring of course, but you can increase your strength really quickly,

 

Mark and I used to play Golf, Darts, or Tennis at the end of every session.  I miss the stress-free Strength building days.

[RIPPA]

Considering how badly you want a hole in one - I dont think Golf is stress free for you anymore

[J.T.]

Considering how badly you want a hole in one - I dont think Golf is stress free for you anymore

 

I am resigned to the fact that I will never get a World Record of a Hole In One if I am trying on purpose to do it or actively desire it to happen.  I will just have to be pleasantly shocked one day.

[CSC]

 

 

And as for clothes, hey, you wouldn't catch Ric Flair coming out on Saturday night on TBS in board shorts and flip flops. You're a champ, a member of the Best Damn Crew in GTA, gotta dress the part.

 

God, that's hard to argue with.  Looks like I might be going shopping when I get home.

[misanthrope304]

Not to be a douche, but...Chris storm= James storm..I believe you were thinking of Chris Harris?  Tag partner in AMW.  

 

That's very kind of you putting me in the same class as Mel on piloting, but Mel is the best hands down.  

 

Love the hard times promo, especially since I listened to Dusty talk about it the other day on the Austin podcast.

 

 

Had a bad day yesterday, sorry to bail in the middle of that session.  Shit came up, not health related.  Just a load of bullshit I shouldn't have to deal with right now.  

[jstout]

 

Considering how badly you want a hole in one - I dont think Golf is stress free for you anymore

 

I am resigned to the fact that I will never get a World Record of a Hole In One if I am trying on purpose to do it or actively desire it to happen.  I will just have to be pleasantly shocked one day.

J.T., is there an obscure accomplishment on this game you either haven't already gotten or aren't working feverishly toward?

 

If there was a "Rub a Dub Dub" award for taking a certain amount of showers, J.T. would be the squeakiest, cleanest one of all of us.

 

"Guys, I unlocked my Mr. Bubble tattoo."

[melraz09]

I was just gettin lucky that day mizz. Like ya said you were lockin on to the fuzz choppers but they blew up as you fired. I was just a split second in front of ya.

[RIPPA]

JT, Robert and I aced Docks to Stocks II last night much to JT's delight.

 

I think it took longer waiting for random cops to walk out of the way so JT could move the crate than anything else we had to deal with.

[jstout]

"He may be a dumbass, but he's our dumbass." - me, to Dan after Kelvin accidentally blew up whatever McGuffin we were going after in some sort of mission. Gaming this afternoon was so much fun, sorry I had to split to go to freakin' work.

 

That Sandy Shores survival is starting to piss me off. I thought I had everything under control until realizing my "cover" was anything but. By then, it was way too late.

 

The game says I've finished the Sandy Survival, but I really don't recall it. I'm pretty damn sure I've never finished the Industrial Plant one (God, is that one tough) and I'm pretty sure I haven't finished the Sawmill Plant one. I think I have a really good spot for that one, but I swear to God, every time I do that one recently, I lose my connection before I can finish.

 

I've finished the rest. Del Perro Pier can be humming along fine one minute and get completely psychotic the next. The Maze Bank one's the same way.

 

Survivals are kinda quaint in these days of the Rooftop Rumble, but I'd like the satisfaction of knowing I've finished all of them.  

[melraz09]

Hopefully, HOPEFULLY I will be on tonight bustin ass, runnin missions, races, D.M.'s, golf, tennis, darts I don't care. Work has kicked me arse this week and now it's time to return the favor on all the lil sum bitches in Los Santos. Whether it be gang attacks, merryweather, the biker bitches, golf balls, or my favorite, every lil white dot that is in our city...kill em all till they get the fuck out CAUSE WE ARE THE D.V.D.R. AND WE ARE THAT DALM GOOD!!!!

[RUkered]

Oh yeah, my favorite in-game utterance lately was when a couple of guys were trying to take me out a few days ago near the most expensive apartment in the game (for now) and I managed to shoot them and said "they come to snuff the Rooster, but he ain't gonna die." Melraz was puzzled, but RUkered immediately joined in on a singalong while Mel doubted our sanity.

 

Melraz and I have been friends since '96 and share similar interests, but there's one place we differ. He's strictly country. Now, I like country too (old school shit like he likes), but I like a lot of other stuff too. I'm always trying to warm him up to rock or metal, but you couldn't get him to listen to an Alice In Chains song if you threatened to shoot him with a nail gun. I'm actually going to see them in concert next month and I sent Mel a cordial invite. His response would make the paint melt off the walls.

 

On a random note, I'm real damn jealous I wasn't a part of this epic failed tanker mission. I'd pay good money for a youtube video of that.

 

 

 

 

 

Considering how badly you want a hole in one - I dont think Golf is stress free for you anymore

 

I am resigned to the fact that I will never get a World Record of a Hole In One if I am trying on purpose to do it or actively desire it to happen.  I will just have to be pleasantly shocked one day.

J.T., is there an obscure accomplishment on this game you either haven't already gotten or aren't working feverishly toward?

 

If there was a "Rub a Dub Dub" award for taking a certain amount of showers, J.T. would be the squeakiest, cleanest one of all of us.

 

"Guys, I unlocked my Mr. Bubble tattoo."

 

 

 

Stout - you and a couple others will understand this - but this post shoved me into a laughing fit like I haven't had since your "Mis will be out front of his apartment having a yard sale" comment. Apparently I have a weakness for DVDVR GTA crew player quirk reference jokes.

[melraz09]

I'd rather put my dick inna meat grinder dude.

[J.T.]

JT, Robert and I aced Docks to Stocks II last night much to JT's delight.

 

I think it took longer waiting for random cops to walk out of the way so JT could move the crate than anything else we had to deal with.

 

You will never see a smoother theft of a cargobob from Fort Zancudo. 

 

Finished up the mission, Mr. Richards, yesterday afternoon.

 

I am pissed off.  Yet another reminder of how Luis shoulda peeled Rocco Pelosi's cap back in Liberty City.

 

Was going to attempt Caida Libre before coming in to work, but I had to come in early for inventory and a meeting.

 

Holy shit, the HMG in the rear of the van callback from The Jackal was sweet.  Why don't crews get any of that kind of equipment to use in jobs?

 

 

J.T., is there an obscure accomplishment on this game you either haven't already gotten or aren't working feverishly toward?

 

If there was a "Rub a Dub Dub" award for taking a certain amount of showers, J.T. would be the squeakiest, cleanest one of all of us.

 

"Guys, I unlocked my Mr. Bubble tattoo."

 

And then I would wail because the Mr. Bubble Tattoo would take the same spot on my leg as the Sword and Skull tattoo, forcing me to choose which one to wear.

 

I have bought Downtown Cab for Franklin but have yet to receive an e-mail about private fares.   Do I just piddle around in a cab until someone hits up my phone or do I have to actually collect fares and act like a cabbie?

[odessasteps]

Its now been so long since i finished the game that i don't recall all the plot points.

All i did this weekend was log in to get my daily mod and Simeon sales. Played WC 2014 instead. Sweden won the World Cup and Zlatan scored 35 goals.

[J.T.]

Yesterday afternoon, I had a $5K bounty on my head.  No one from the crew was online to collect on me, so I decided to wait out the bounty at my penthouse on Alta Street by watching the other players on WEAZEL.

 

When I flipped to one of the Rank 100ish guys, I caught him trying to ambush me by using the garage bug.  Pussy. 

 

So much for the garage bug being fixed with the last update.

 

I promptly reported him and voted to kick him out of the session. He then proceeded to try to shoot up my garage in retaliation before I left the session.  I managed to bail before he destroyed any of my cars.

 

He then sent me an angry PM blaming me for him getting his dunce cap.  If you don't want to be punished for cheating, then don't fucking cheat.

 

My sinuses are fucking killing me today, so I may use a few of my billion hours of sick time and bail out.  I will pick up some of the remedy Melraz suggested on my way home.  If there are a lot of us online this afternoon, I am up for whatever be it missions or perishing fools in free mode.

[Robert C]

 

JT, Robert and I aced Docks to Stocks II last night much to JT's delight.

 

I think it took longer waiting for random cops to walk out of the way so JT could move the crate than anything else we had to deal with.

 

You will never see a smoother theft of a cargobob from Fort Zancudo. 

 

Yeah, I've done a few of those, and can't remember one ever going that well.  Of course, I screwed us up for it by getting my ass shot off twice in quick succession when we got to the docks.  I think maybe I should have waited to start launching rockets till I hit the yellow circle.  That might've kept the cops off of us.

 

Before Docks to Stocks came along, JT, Dolfan and I declared "The park is ours" in Little Seoul, and proceeded to wipe out everybody that had spawned there after a DM.  There was nobody even close by the time we were done.  Suckers need to develop a healthy fear of the heavy sniper.

 

Found a couple servers with big groups in one place on public servers this weekend, and for some reason I was rocking on the sniper rifle.  Most of the map was down at the airport for the first one.  I'd sniped half a dozen guys before I realized that the server was basically one crew plus me.  I kicked up a hornet's nest with that one, but still wound up about even.  Weird thing was that sticky bombs wouldn't explode on that server.  I tried 3 and none went off.  They worked fine on others.

 

Second big group was all down by the beach, apparently just hanging out.  I probably wound up with about 40 sniper kills on them.  One guy was in passive, but couldn't seem to remember that passive doesn't work if you're in a vehicle.  Another one kept trying to run me down in his Banshee.  I shot him out of it 3 or 4 times, then set off the sticky on the back when he decided to make a run for it.  Best kill though was sniping 2 guys off of a jetski with one heavy sniper round.

 

I played the world's most ridiculous DM as well.  20 minutes, 100+ kills.  And I came in 3rd out of 7 people.  It was basically spawn, shoot, die, repeat.

[J.T.]

We redeemed our souls this weekend, Robert. 

 

We stood down when we saw those two guys just chillin' on the beach riding BMX bikes and not really bothering anyone.  Of course, if they'd drawn their guns, they'd have been bleeding on the sand before they knew what was up.  DVDR is a Live And Let Die organization. 

 

If you are cool, then we are cool.  If you raise up, we put you down.

 

Almost forgot and speaking of putting guys down hard.  I had to clip of lowbie murdering assholes this morning from a crew named Maximum Kaos (crew tag: MAXK).  Two Rank 50's hunting a Rank 8 guy just trying to get away and find a car to sell?  Seriously?  At least when I shoot at lowbies, I am returning their fire.

 

Anyway, this morning's object lesson for MAXK reminded me that guys who have dude avatars that wear skinny jeans are also on my Standing Order To Kill list.

[RIPPA]

Oh Damn

Batista better not walk around JT's block the next time the WWE runs VA

[J.T.]

Oh Damn

 

Batista better not walk around JT's block the next time the WWE runs VA

 

This is a video game thing.  Doesn't take calculus or a complex algorithm to compute the level of the well deserved real life assbeating I'd get if I were stupid enough to bum rush Big Dave.

 

It probably wouldn't even be Batista that beat the shit out of me.  My narrrow ass wouldn't even get past the security detail.  No GTA Online Mary Lou Combat Roll or Volus Flip Flop & Fly would help me dodge my fate.