BobbyWhioux Posted November 28, 2024 Posted November 28, 2024 Russo was also genuinely trying to give us new faces on top, without it simply being putting his [wwf] hands over all the homegrown talent. the strategy was right. It was his tactics that so often failed. what’s the old saying in sports? If he’s your fifth best player you have a good team, if he’s your best player you have a bad team? That’s Russo in the writing room. Aiming for Memphis style with a broken scope feels very apt. I’ve often said ECW had a lot of Memphis under the hood, and Russo’s share of Attitude Era crash TV is co-opting that ECW feel 2
twiztor Posted November 28, 2024 Posted November 28, 2024 1 hour ago, SirSmUgly said: Jarrett just went full Russo by the time he was booking himself on top in TNA. Since Russia is the worst possible version of Memphis anyone could imagine, that's a real problem! i think that is accurate, but it also is reflective of older school booking too. TNA wasn't offering contracts, mainly just per-show deals. Jarrett saw himself as #1 the biggest "name" in the company, which was largely true pre-Sting. But also, as point #2, the one guy he could for sure count on that wouldn't leave him high and dry. i think THAT is why we saw a good number of people win the NWA title, but nobody besides Jarrett really held it for long. Once Spike gets involved and they start signing guys to contracts, and also bringing in more established talent (Sting, Christian, Kurt Angle), Jarrett largely steps out of the main spotlight. also, had to LOL at the autocorrect here. It is making me debate whether/how/if that could be accurate too. Seriously, i put WAY too much thought into this comparison. 1
zendragon Posted November 28, 2024 Posted November 28, 2024 48 minutes ago, BobbyWhioux said: Russo was also genuinely trying to give us new faces on top, without it simply being putting his [wwf] hands over all the homegrown talent. the strategy was right. It was his tactics that so often failed. what’s the old saying in sports? If he’s your fifth best player you have a good team, if he’s your best player you have a bad team? That’s Russo in the writing room. Aiming for Memphis style with a broken scope feels very apt. I’ve often said ECW had a lot of Memphis under the hood, and Russo’s share of Attitude Era crash TV is co-opting that ECW feel Tod Gordon talks in his recent book about ECW-NWA being an attempt at a territory style promotion in the era of WWF/WCW cartoon wrestling 2
SirSmUgly Posted December 4, 2024 Author Posted December 4, 2024 (edited) Show #246 – 26 June 2000 "The one that seems to already be figuring out its post-Bischoff, post-Russo direction" Well, I can say with confidence that we should be Hogan-free before I take my winter break from these reviews in a few days! Bash at the Beach 2000, here I come! Thirteen more days, you goofy bald asshole! Recap: Tank Abbott s Three Count, Scott Steiner probably should be the world champ, and other stuff from last week. I’ve typed it before, but I’m so happy that the Jimmy Hart Three Count theme is on these recordings. M.I. Smooth helps the Cat book the show in the front seat of their limo. Unfortunately, this Cat theme dub still exists on these recordings. Our fair commissioner comes to the ring, and I get a chuckle out of him getting some corner pyro. I love that in kayfabe, he used his position to get himself a little pyro. One of my favorite things about the run-up to BatB is that Hulk Hogan hasn’t really been on these shows at all. Maybe I’ve sat through my last terrible Hulkster promo in this watch, or at least close to it, which I am thrilled with either way. Anyway, the Cat bigs up his New Blood friends’ chances at BatB, then books some matches: Nash and Scott Steiner have qualifying matches against Mike Awesome and Shane Douglas respectively; if they win them, they’re into a Four Corners match for the world title against Jeff Jarrett later tonight. The fourth corner in that match? Goldberg, who is not required to qualify. Hacksaw Jim Duggan walks onto the ramp, still dressed like a janitor (though sans the now-retired WCW Television Championship – R.I.P., noble title belt with a mostly awesome lineage). Duggan is bummed that most of the Millionaire’s Club guys are off television and laments Goldberg’s change in attitude. Whoops, that remark means that Goldberg now has to qualify for the main event title match; The Cat impulsively books him against Duggan tonight. Duggan’s willing to risk his other kidney to defend his manhood, which is pretty dumb! You only have two kidneys, and you’ve already lost one of them, Duggan! The desk talks about tonight’s card before kicking us to the back, where Vampiro acts like a complete goof in front of a dark backdrop and lighting that some WCW techs picked up at a Spencer’s Gifts and demands that Dale Torborg and Asya meet him there. Torborg and Asya see this on a monitor elsewhere in the arena; Torborg storms off to make that meeting while Asya worriedly calls after him. Shane Douglas shows up to the locker room and is shocked when Slick Johnson shows him tonight’s booking sheet. Kanyon is at a book signing. Also, two security guys are at his signing. And I guess the cameraperson is there, too, since this is being taped. Those four people are the only four people at the signing. Kanyon tries to give a copy of his book away for free; the security guy balks at the cost. Oh wow, we've got Sean O’Haire and Mark Jindrak for the first time on this Nitro watch! Here are two more guys who did nothing in the WWF/E, but who probably are long-term upper-midcarders on U.S. television if WCW survives into the new-aughts. Man, WCW getting sold to Vince McMahon is the most catastrophic thing to happen to pro wrestling in this part of the world, and I’m not sure it’s particularly close. The future Natural Born Thrillers have a tall short, but skilled task against Rey Misterio Jr. and Juventud Guerrera (w/the Filthy Animals). I get a kick out of the end of the Animals' pre-match jabbering, where after Disco does some dorky mic work, he and Konnan put their arms around one another’s shoulders and smile about how good it was. Tony S. puts over that these rookies only had a short stint in the Power Plant as O’Haire and Jindrak clear the ring to start; O’Haire then destroys Juvi with a press slam before Jindrak tags in and pins Juvi for two off an O’Haire lariat. Jindrak misses an Asai moonsault, and Juvi gets some punches in before combining with Rey on a lariat/sunset flip combo for two. Juvi goes up and drills Jindrak with a missile dropkick for two more. Juvi wheelbarrows Jindrak on the ground, opening Jindrak’s junk up for a diving double-legdrop into his most sensitive of spots. Juvi and Rey rain blows upon Jindrak’s head, but Jindrak ducks out of the way of a double-dropkick in which the Animals try to dropkick Jindrak from opposite sides. The heels kick each other in the balls and aren’t free to stop the hot tag. Rey and Juvi get on one another’s shoulders to try and mitigate the height advantage that the rookies have, but it doesn’t work; they get suplexed. Rey gets deposited to the floor, and Jindrak lands a side slam before O’Haire hits a Seanton Bomb for three in what would be considered a major upset if WCW hadn’t already booked their cruiserweights into the dirt. Post-match, the other Animals attack the rookies, but Lance Storm runs in for the save. WHERE IS TEAM CANADA, DAMMIT?! Anyway, great way to get Jindrak and O’Haire over as phenoms (of the non-Undertaker type) who are so gifted that they were rushed through the Power Plant and then beat two former WCW Cruiserweight Champions on their debut. You know what weird matchup I wish we got on television? Jindrak and O’Haire against High Voltage. Give those teams eight or ten minutes, and I bet it gets on my Good Matches list. Speaking of, this match got on my Good Matches list, so hooray for that. Back from break, the Filthy Animals yell about Lance Storm; the Cat is displeased with Storm’s constant run-ins over the last few shows and tells the Animals to find Storm and haul him in. In a funny aside, he also demands that someone check the Animals’ pockets as they leave his office. Jim Duggan’s wife Debra is having flashbacks to when Yokozuna destroyed her man back in late 1992 or early 1993 or whenever it was; trying to avert another massacre, she pleads with Duggan backstage not to get destroyed by Goldberg because their kids sure would like a father who is functional! This was actually a good segment, by the way, as Duggan calmly, but seriously reassures his upset wife that he’s got to do this for himself and ends by saying that he really does believe he can win. Huh. I guess when you turn down the volume on a loud character and he and his wife do some decent (for pro wrestling) acting, it stands out. It’s also helpful that this is actually a simple story – over-the-hill wrestler with kidney problems and too much pride vs. world destroyer. I’m actually interested in how this match will play out. Vito insists on talking before defending his WCW Hardcore Championship. He proclaims himself the best hardcore champ ever in this company by audience acclaim and then casts out an open challenge that is answered by a masked Jamie Noble. Oh, and an unmasked Jimmy Yang. Ah, and finally, an equally unmasked Kaz Hayashi. Wouldn’t you know it? The cruiserweights are easily handled by Vito until Kaz gets there. This is actually something of a match, if a handicap match, where the kendo stick that Vito is holding gets the most play as a weapon. The numbers game gets to Vito; the Dragons hit a triple splash from the top rope and Kaz pins Vito while Yang counts. There’s no title change here, though. The Funker continues training Johnny the Bull by directing him to attack a dummy with Vito’s face plastered over it with a chair, but Funk backjumps the Bull as Johnny advances on the dummy and reminds him that all’s fair in love and hardcore wrestling. The lesser future members of the Natural Born Thrillers, Palumbo and Stasiak, bust into the production truck and start causing trouble again. Shane Douglas finds M.I. Smooth and tries to plot a way to get out of his match against Scott Steiner; Smooth offers him a plan for avoiding the match that we don’t hear on camera. The Filthy Animals have determined that Canadians are both dumb and weak, so Lance Storm shouldn’t be hard to find and, when found, chains are unnecessary for beating him up and bringing him in front of the Cat. Bret Hart would have something to say about that assertion, probably, and he'd say it with crisp lifters and back-breaking Sharpshooters. I really wish we got Bret/Rey and Bret/Juvi, by the way, two matchups that I don’t remember seeing during my watch. WCW, why are you so withholding? Shane Douglas tries to pull a version of a plan executed months ago by The Total Package and pretends that he slipped on some water and busted up his leg. The Cat wants ol’ Shane to wrestle anyway, but Shane suggests Buff Bagwell as his replacement. The Cat decides that he thought of that idea himself and books it; once the Cat leaves, Shane cackles with glee and slips M.I. Smooth some cash for providing him with the idea for his scheme. Cranky-ass Tank Abbott snaps at people in the back until he settles down in front of a monitor to watch Three Count, a group that brings joy into the hearts of even the crustiest old bastards. Three Count dances to their theme music. Tank also dances; he’s actually worse than Three Count is at grooving. Meanwhile, The Perfect Event fucks with Three Count’s music in the truck, which pisses Tank off. The same now-bald production guy from last week points Tank toward The Perfect Event. Abbott marches them toward the ring, then grabs a mic and demands that TPE put their tag belts up against Three Count as compensation for fucking up their dance routine. The crowd seems baffled by these developments; did they not see the segments that led up to this on the TurnerTron? Helms and Moore hit stereo planchas and please, please, PLEASE put the tag titles on them. The crowd settles on a THREE COUNT SUCKS chant, and dumbass Palumbo yells SHUT UP at the crowd. They’re not chanting at you idiots because you’re not over as heels, Palumbo. Chill out. Helms ends up as guy in peril, but is able to DDT his way out of a powerbomb attempt and score a cold tag. Moore is a heel, remember? The match is fine, mostly because of Helms and Moore, but the reaction from the crowd hurts the match. Moore is able to wriggle away from Palumbo and shove him into Stasiak, but Palumbo intervenes with the Lex Flexer after Helms lands a Frog Splash. TPE lands their weak double-flapjack finisher for three. KroniK’s music immediately hits after Stasiak scores the pinfall; they beat the shit out of TPE while Madden annoys the shit out of me on commentary; FATTY BOOM BATTY, BANGGGGGGG is one of the worst calls ever. As is TIME TO BURN ONE. As is almost everything this guy yells. SPINAROONIE x3 is the only catchphrase this guy yelled that ever stuck. Shane Helms gets up and demands that KroniK’s music is cut and that their music is played again; Adams and Clarke are not a fan of this, but Tank Abbott comes back out here and throws enough hard rights at both KroniK members that Three Count takes the easy advantage. Actually, there’s quite a bit of promise in Three Count having a dangerous protector who helps them get and hold the tag titles. It’s just that instead of something logical (Three Count hires Tank as a bodyguard; Tank can barely stand them, but likes their money), Ruschoff went with something goofy (Tank fanboys out to one thing, and one thing only – Three Count’s music). Juvi walks down a hallway alone and looking for Lance Storm; someone just off-screen batters him with a pipe. Debra sobs as Hacksaw declares KISS THE GIRLS FOR ME! I CAN DO IT! I CAN BEAT HIM; Goldberg, on the other hand, walks out of his dressing room looking quite unbeatable. Hey, Kanyon’s book signing has a line now! There are suspiciously no kids or teens in the line, though, and that’s because Kanyon is giving out free alcohol to get people to take his book. This bit hasn’t been funny, but it’s not so unfunny that I completely hate it, so that’s a small win for WCW's creative. Hype video: Hacksaw beat cancer, but can he beat Goldberg? I personally think beating cancer is far more impressive than beating Goldberg anyway. Here we go: It’s Duggan/Goldberg up next. The Cat pops in before Goldberg comes out to remind Duggan of his no interference rule and to extricate the 2x4 from Duggan’s grasp as it is an illegal object. Check this cheating fuck Duggan for a roll of tape while you’re at it, Cat. Duggan gives up the 2x4. Goldberg enters the ring, and then, in a rare case where Duggan should be standing toe-to-toe with a main eventer, he fires up and actually out-strikes a mildly surprised Goldberg before Goldberg levels him with a lariat. Duggan empties the tank to try and put Goldberg down, but Goldberg is never in danger, no matter how much Duggan gets the crowd behind him. Goldberg lands a punch to the kidneys, maneuvers around Duggan firing up out of a neck vice, and pops right up from a body slam to cut off a football tackle with a spear, Jackhammer, SPLAT. An irritated Goldberg rapid-fire punches Duggan in his remaining kidney after he gets three. Duggan bleeds from his mouth as Goldberg stalks away; Debra cries over her fallen husband’s body as Hacksaw does a stretcher job that is actually appropriate and would have hit harder if WCW didn’t do stretcher jobs every other show already. Well, if you’re trying to make Goldberg a heel, this is one way to tamp down the GOLDBERG chants. I liked this match an awful lot and had to think about whether or not it constituted a Charming Uniquity or flat out good. I shade toward the former because the strength of this whole deal was that it was a successful angle built to use Duggan’s eternal overness and earlier health problems to stop Goldberg from being cheered so damned much. The match was an important part of that, but on its own, it’s not something you’d watch and enjoy in isolation, I don’t believe. Anyway, I put this on the Charming Uniquity list, and this is the first time that I’ve put something on that list since THE WALL, BROTHER destroyed Crowbar on Thunder back in early March 2000. This leads me to my next point; I think the lack of matches that I’d put on the Charming Uniquity list over the past year or so of television is one of the biggest signs that this company is creatively cooked, maybe more than the additions (or lack thereof) to any other list I'm keeping. WCW used to have weird matches that were supremely enjoyable even if they weren’t mechanically great all the time. Now, most of those former charming uniquities have been replaced on these shows with forgettable or flat-out bad segments that often try to capture some of the unique weirdness of classic WCW, but fail miserably. The babyfaces are upset about Duggan being gravely injured; Nash is disgusted as he watches paramedics loading Duggan into an ambulance and intones that THIS SHIT IS GONNA STOP. Mike Awesome comes to the ring and is almost certainly going to be the focus of Kevin Nash’s ire. Maybe the Cat should have consulted with M.I. Smooth on his match sequencing; he might have let Nash cool off a bit in the back before getting him into the ring. Nash dominates Awesome early and like Goldberg, never feels even remotely close to being beaten, even when Awesome gets 2.5 on a diving lariat and another near fall on a top-rope splash. Awesome is feeling himself a bit too much, tries a powerbomb, and gets back body dropped out of it. The bout spills outside, and though Awesome is able to get some space and grab a chair, Nash boots it into his face back in the ring and gets a quick three. Tygress walks up to a hurt Rey, who was jumped off camera. After a break, Konnan gets hit in the head by an unseen assailant's pipe while looking for that punk mark buster Lance Storm. We get a recap of Shane Douglas and Buff Bagwell’s recent beef before former annoying bro buddies Buff and Scott Steiner (w/Midajah) wrestle one another once more. They face off; Buff does his dance and Steiner responds with a middle finger and some fierce clubbering. Madden asserts that Scott and Buff are friends again and Hudson states that they respect one another. First of all, when did they become friends again, and second, I just saw one guy do a mocking dance and another guy respond with a rude gesture, none of which seemed very respectful to me. Buff manages a spot of control and lands a Vader Bomb, but after Scotty is done taking a half-back body drop when he’s supposed to be landing on his feet, Steiner gets right back into control and cranks his good friend Buff’s surgically reconstructed neck, lands an overhead suplex, and tries a Steiner Recliner that Buff scoots away from. Buff is able to hang Scotty on the ropes and hit a sloppy double-arm DDT. He also hits a sloppy Blockbuster, but Steiner kicks out at two, attacks Buff while the latter is in Slick Johnson’s face about the pace of Slick’s count, and lands a belly-to-belly suplex for three. After the match, Scotty and Buff actually shake hands and hug, so I guess there was some respect there that only showed up after the match was over. Shane Douglas jumps the rail and clubs Bagwell from behind; Scotty has to come back to the ring to chase him off. Scott and Buff pose, and Tony S. is cut off in mid-sentence so that we can go backstage and watch a woman who I think is Pamela Paulshock (even though honestly I didn’t recognize her at first) interviews Jeff Jarrett. I honestly couldn’t pick Pam Paulshock out of a lineup, but I really struggle to recognize blonde men and women (unless I’ve seen them often), so probably that’s it. Jarrett is confident about his chances both tonight and at BatB. Ms. Hancock slips out of David Flair’s dressing room. Why in the wide, wide world of kayfabe does David Flair have his own dressing room? That is absurd. Anyway, Daffney hides behind a crate and once again confirms what we already know, which is that her low-rent boyfriend Dopey Dave got confidence after a woman genuinely liked him and immediately figured out how to trade her in for another woman whom he thinks is hotter. Dammit, Dopey Dave! Hancock comes to the ring, asserts her sexuality, and then dances while that idiot Madden nonsensically yells SNOOCHIE BOOCHIES. Daffney rushes the ring tries to jump Hancock in mid-dance, eats a high heel to the face, and rolls around on the mat while Hudson expresses his disbelief that these women would fight over Dopey David Flair. And here’s where I’d insert the stingiagree.gif if I could. Hancock, uh, wins this fight? That doesn’t seem right. She walks away; Daffney gets a mic and for some fucking reason is ready to fight for David Flair’s affections. She challenges Hancock to a BatB match and promises to send Hancock packing for her old job at Hooters. An unseen assailant has turned back the hapless Filthy Animals, or at least all except for Disco, who suggests a change in tactics. In a production snafu, we get told for the first time all night that Kanyon’s book signing happened EARLIER TODAY, which they really should have been consistent about. Fuckin’ Craig Leathers, dammit, I don’t care what Russo’s showrunning directions are, DO YOUR FUCKIN’ JOB RIGHT. Booker T. walks up behind Kanyon, asks him to sign a brick, and then destroys Kanyon with punches, a chair, and a table slam. Wait, Book, you forgot to get Kanyon’s signature on that brick! Pam Paulshock interviews Hancock, the latter of whom agrees to take up Daffney’s challenge, but only if the match is a Wedding Gown Match, which is like an Evening Gown Match, but with wedding gowns. I thought they were wedding dresses with trains. Is that different from a gown? Anyway, Hancock says she’ll be wearing something MUCH MORE SEXIER than Daffney at the PPV, but there’s nothing more sexy than good grammar if you ask me! (Uh, please ignore my various typos in the pre-edited versions of these reviews. Thanks!) Disco Inferno demands the presence of Lance Storm in the ring for a match right now; Storm jumps Disco in the ring and easily controls him. I do not remember Storm coming into the company as some sort of crusading babyface at all. I just thought he was a full-on Canadian supremacist for his whole run. Disco manages to gain control of the match, sparks a small DISCO SUCKS chant, and then is awkwardly tackled on a duckdown that they do again because the first attempt at the spot was so ugly. Disco dodges a dropkick, whiffs on a second-rope elbow, and is hit with a rana for two. Storm scores a mediocre-looking handspring lariat and lands a Northern Lights Suplex with a bridge for two more. Storm shoots Disco into the corner and gets elbowed out of a corner charge; Disco lands an inverted atomic drop. He tries to follow up with a Chartbuster, but Storm slips away, grabs Disco’s leg, and rolls into a half-Boston half-Canadian Crab for the submission. The Filthy Animals attack Storm after the match, but Billy Kidman hits the ring with the same lead pipe that we saw take out the Animals from off screen, so I guess it was him clubbing his old on-again, off-again friends over their heads. Every single person in this segment is being booked aimlessly, including the debuting Storm. What Ruschoff is doing with Rey in particular is just criminal. Before a break, Dale Torborg enters the basement of the arena. After that break, Vampiro jumps him and tries to hang him with a chain. I forgot about the challenge that Vampiro made to Torborg earlier, so coming back to this shitty angle was a somewhat unpleasant surprise. Oh, well, they can’t all be winners, especially considering who’s booking. You can’t see much of this boilerplate brawl what with the shitty lighting, but it doesn’t matter. Let me just tell you how it ends. Vampiro puts Torborg in a casket, but before he can close the lid, someone in a Sting mask attacks Vamp from behind and places the mask on his face. Very dumb. Also, Vampiro as cosplay Undertaker deeply fucking sucks. Pam Paulshock and Konnan have a contentious interview, but ultimately, Konnan challenges Lance Storm and Billy Kidman to fight the Animals on Thunder. Jeff Jarrett, Scott Steiner (w/Midajah), Kevin Nash, and Goldberg meet in the ring to battle for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship in tonight’s Four Corners main event. This is a Nitro Special of a main event and only goes about six minutes. Before it even begins, we swing backstage, where Goldberg finishes destroying Kevin Nash in Nash’s own dressing room. Jarrett and Steiner have a one-on-one match to start, which is fine. It’s rushed, but these two have good chemistry. Goldberg runs to the ring when Steiner looks to have Jarrett down and beats the fuck out of Scotty, including hitting a sick military press into a powerslam. However, he posts himself on a spear and gets belly-to-belly’d by Steiner for two; Jarrett yanks ref Charles Robinson out of the ring to save his title. No offense to Jarrett, but I would like to go back to the two meaty men bumpin’ meat ([tm] Big E), please. Hey, there’s a light GOLDBERG SUCKS chant in the crowd. Good if you’re trying to get his heel turn over! Bad if you take a step back and realize that he was the only bankable babyface you had in the whole company! Goldberg and Jarrett toy with Steiner; Mike Awesome comes to the ring, which I guess is because he’s replacing Kevin Nash. Ah, who even knows. Awesome accosts Midajah and takes away the U.S. title as Steiner makes a comeback, disposes of Goldberg with a lariat, and tries to pin Jarrett. Awesome yanks Steiner from the ring, clubs him with the belt, and helps Goldberg beat him down outside the ring; a recovered Kevin Nash jogs down, bypasses the dudes outside the ring, and tries to put away Jarrett quickly so that he can win the big gold. Awesome and Goldberg kinda let that happen for a minute; Awesome tries to make the save, but Nash puts him down. Goldberg is next to try and save Jarrett, and though Nash initially big boots him, he’s up quickly and able to drop Nash with a standing side kick that Jarrett makes the cover on for three. Goldberg taunts Nash by waving Scott Hall’s torn-up contract in his face while Des Moines tosses beer cups in the ring (hey, twiztor, were you anywhere near this show when it happened?). I enjoyed this show well enough, actually. It’s obviously not perfect or anywhere near it, but it feels like a proto-version of what the show will become as it barrels toward cancellation: Mostly focused on young guys slowly getting over with their work, interspersed with goofy 2000-era booking because that’s just how U.S. pro wrestling was at the time. 2.75 out of 5 Stinger Splashes. Edited December 4, 2024 by SirSmUgly 4
twiztor Posted December 5, 2024 Posted December 5, 2024 7 hours ago, SirSmUgly said: Show #246 – 26 June 2000 hey, twiztor, were you anywhere near this show when it happened? i was not. DM is about 3 hours from me (i'm about halfway between Des Moines and Chicago). And sadly, i never went to a WCW show. I lament missing out on Great American Bash '97 (a friend implied that his dad had tickets to go, so 14 year old me hung out at their house all day waiting to take the hour drive to the event. sadly, that didn't happen. i wore my homemade Macho Man shirt and everything!) But by 2000, i had long checked out of WCW. probably didn't even know it was happening. 1
BobbyWhioux Posted December 5, 2024 Posted December 5, 2024 I was in attendance for Superbrawl IX [Feb of 99], about a year and a half before where Smelly is in his Nitro rewatch, and with all the changes to WCW's landscape 1 year feels like 10. I don't think anything I saw that night had any bearing on June 2000. Except Hogan wrestling Flair for the belt in the main. That's basically eternal. And I don't even remember who actually won that night. [Just that the ending schmozz was Torrie Wilson's in-the-flesh debut. So probably Hogan? BPP vs DDP stole the show (we got a Frankensteiner!) and Rey Jr. lost his mask (I can't imagine anyone really thought Miss Elizabeth was going to get her head shaved).] 1
SirSmUgly Posted December 6, 2024 Author Posted December 6, 2024 Thunder Interlude – show number one hundred and sixteen – 28 June 2000 "The WCW Gang might just be turning a corner, maybe" It’s another Thunder, baby!... Eleven more days, you puke-orange shitheel!.. Recap: Goldberg cements his heel turn by destroying Jim Duggan…Some midcarders do some nondescript feuding…Jeff Jarrett continues to hang on to his world title… Jeff Jarrett complains to M.I. Smooth about the Cat booking him in so many title shots lately…Smooth reminds Jarrett that he’s still the champ and still runs the title scene…Jarrett is mollified… It’s the Thunder title sequence… Jeff Jarrett is the guy to kick off tonight’s opening squawkfest…Jarrett crows about how great he is and peacocks a bit while wearing the gold…He also parrots his previous statements about searching for hefty women who will sing for him after he beats Hulk Hogan at Bash at the Beach…His eagle-eyed search of the crowd has him thinking that maybe one of the ladies here in the Lincoln, Nebraska crowd might be suitable…However, all this braggadocio metaphorically hangs like an albatross around his neck…He eventually is shut up when he turns around and swallows a beatdown from an onrushing Horace Hogan until R&B Security is able to separate them…The Cat makes an appearance and, in what might be Horace’s swan song in this company, books him in a world title match against Jeff Jarrett for later tonight… The desk offers up our other matchups for tonight: The Artist and Paisley against Disco Inferno and Tygress and the Billy Kidman/Lance Storm vs. (probably) Rey Misterio Jr. and Juventud Guerrera matches are mentioned…We cut to General Rection lecturing his dopey troops…Rection is teaming with Stash to face The Perfect Event later tonight…He also declares that Loco and Cajun will wrestle for the WCW Cruiserweight Championship…Loco is displeased about the prospect… Gene Okerlund interviews Positively Kanyon backstage…Kanyon says that he’s going to get himself over by hitting Kanyon Cutters on as many people as possible…Okerlund quickly backs away to save his neck… Lt. Loco defends his cruiserweight belt against his fellow misfit Cpl. Cajun…Rection unfortunately joins commentary…He is very bad at talking, by the way…Cajun and Loco trade flash two counts in the ring…Loco gets two on a rana, complains about the count to the ref, and then gets rolled up from behind by Cajun for two…Loco takes control, but Cajun survives a brief onslaught and lands a headscissors and a tilt-a-whirl for two…Loco tries to outrun Cajun, but runs himself into a floatover powerslam for two more…Cajun makes the mistake of ducking down on a rope run and gets overhead suplexed for two… Cajun gets away from Loco’s follow-up attack with a shoulder to the gut…He runs at Loco and gets backdropped to the floor…He then is completely out of place to catch Loco on a pretty plancha, moves forward to catch him, and instead merely shoulders Loco in the face…Geez, man…Back in the ring, Loco is able to dodge a Whiplash 2000 and land a tornado DDT for three… Johnny the Bull walks around looking for Terry Funk…He asks a janitor where the Funker is and turns away when the janitor doesn’t have a good answer for him, but the catch is that the janitor is Funk in disguise…Funk clatters the Bull with a mop and then yells JOHNNY, JOHNNY, YOU FOOL, NEVER EVER LET YOUR GUARD DOWN, which makes me laugh…Terry Funk is a gem… I read somewhere that Terry Taylor was heading up a booking committee that booked these last few shows, which, if true, explains why they are so much more watchable…I need to verify the veracity of this claim, however…WCW’s history of head bookers and committee members is a total mess… Scott Steiner threatens the Cat with an *ahem* anal intrusion if he doesn’t get Mike Awesome in the ring tonight… Three Count stands in the ring ready to groove…Before they do, Shane Helms decries reports that copies of their new singles are being thrown out in droves…Shannon Moore denies that Three Count ever lip synchs sings…Evan Karagias hopes to smash some fangirls…They dance…It’s truly awful…O’Haire and Jindrak have had enough of this nonsense…They rush the ring…Our match starts with Jindrak and O’Haire dominating Evan Karagias until Karagias ducks a corner splash from Jindrak…Karagias follows with a springboard splash to the outside… We cut away to Tank Abbott arriving at the arena…He spots a monitor and realizes he missed Three Count’s dance routine…This sends him into a rage…Back in the ring, Three Count controls Jindrak…A THREE COUNT SUCKS chant fires up…Moore rains blows upon Jindrak’s head…He tries to lift Jindrak, who doesn’t go up, so Moore tags in Karagias and gets a little help on the suplex attempt that makes it successful…Unfortunately for Three Count, Moore whiffs on a corkscrew body splash attempt soon after…O’Haire gets the hot tag, launches Moore, and superkicks Karagias to the floor…Jindrak and O’Haire combine on a tilt-a-whirl slam/Seanton Bomb combo for three…Jindrak and O’Haire are fun…Three Count’s obviously extremely enjoyable as well… Tank Abbott hurries to the ring after the match and apologizes to the erstwhile boy band wrestlers for being late…He has his dancing square, though, and he’s ready to cut a rug, so Three Count had better sing now…Helms tries to get the injured Karagias and Moore in place to boogie and succeeds...Tank joins them on his square placed outside the ring…This is pretty dumb, man, but in the absolute best of ways…KroniK jumps Tank as he dances, dispatches of him, and then gets in the ring and obliterates Three Count…Yeah, I totally believe that a Terry Taylor-led booking team is putting these shows together…The matches aren’t super-short and the segments (that involve entertaining wrestlers, at least) are generally enjoyable…I don’t know where Ruschoff has fucked off to in the past few weeks, but please leave them there… Kanyon hits a cutter on the caterer for not having any au jus for his steak… Vito demands that Penzer hit all of Vito’s nicknames for himself in Penzer’s introduction…On top of that, Vito himself talks…It’s unpleasant…Some of his buddies from around the way razzed him for getting worked over by the Jung Dragons…He’s now decided to redeem himself by having a Gauntlet Match against them… Jimmy Yang’s the first man up…Yang’s Bruce Lee-ish gimmick rules because Bruce Lee rules…Vito eventually uses his size to take the advantage and lands a Savage Elbow for three…Kaz is next up…I’m bummed that Three Count, the Jung Dragons, and the Filthy Animals are fodder for the heavyweights no matter which heavyweights they are…Vito should not be pushed as that much better than all three Dragons…Or better than them at all…Anyway, Vito blocks a rana attempt and lands a running Electric Chair Drop (!!), then hits a top-rope splash for three… Jamie Noble is the final man standing for the Dragons…Noble unloads with an array of crisp moves, culminating in a guillotine legdrop and a top-rope splash of his own for 2.7…Aw, fuck off, WCW…Vito shouldn’t have been able to survive that…I get it…Vito is being built as a guy who can take loads of punishment, which is why he’s champ…But there’s no need to feed a bunch of talented dudes to him…At least he loses here when Jamie and Johnny the Bull do a masked switcheroo and the Bull lands a diving front dropkick for three…In the back, the Funker is pleased that the Bull quickly took in his lesson on how to disguise oneself to get the jump on one’s opponent…This made sense as a segment, but I still don’t like the Jung Dragons getting run over like this… The Cat calls Mike Awesome in and tells him that unfortunately, he’s got to punish Mike Awesome for breaking his “no interference” rule by booking him against Scott Steiner later in the show… Daffney comes upon a hairdresser doing Ms. Hancock’s hair…The hairdresser is summarily replaced by Daffney, who grabs a handful of hair, yanks Hancock to the ground, and dumps baby powder on the prone Hancock before security constrains the screaming, irate cuckoldress… The Perfect Event grab the production tech whose head Dopey Dave shaved and march him off…Another tech looks on and doesn’t see Kanyon run in from just out of his cone of vision, land a Kanyon Cutter, and yell BANG!...That last part got a tiny pop from the crowd, by the way… After some B-roll of The Perfect Event’s recent feud with bald Woody the tech guy, we see TPE in the ring, threatening the health and safety of Woody…General Rection and Private Stash hustle to the ring and start their match with TPE before Woody can be harmed…We get almost no shine so that Rection can go right to the FIP segment…Now, this makes me think that Russo must be around backstage or at least faxing in his suggestions about match structure…Then again, no one wants to see Stasiak and Palumbo work that long anyway…These fellas fucking suck, man…Stasiak can’t even time a big boot properly… Eventually, Rection hits a suplex and, dammit, doesn’t score a hot tag…There’s more of this fucking FIP segment…Fuck off, everyone in this ring…That includes you, Billy Silverman…Finally, a hot tag, thank the wrestling gods…Rection uses Stash's control segment to quickly recover and hits Stasiak with a No Laughing Matter for three before Palumbo attacks the winners with the flex bar…KroniK marches back to the ring for another destruction of a hapless opponent…TPE eats a couple of High Times…We cut away before the second one, but I’ll assume they landed it… Jeff Jarrett slums it in this title defense against Horace Hogan…Jarrett has wrapped a Hulkamania shirt around his KABONGing guitar…Jarrett should absolutely steamroll Horace, but of course, that doesn’t happen…They have an obligabrawl which Horace mostly wins, though Jarrett is able to get some space, grab a chair, and clang Horace in the leg with it…A series of follow-up chair shots gives Jarrett some purchase in the bout, but he loses control back in the ring and gets beaten up at ringside by Horace some more… Horace gets two back in the ring, and I am just done with any and all Hogan family members on this show…There’s a ref bump…Jarrett lands a chair shot to the head, but only gets 2.8…Horace blocks a head-ramming with a chair, hits one of his own, and gets two…Jarrett tries a second-rope double-axe and gets kicked in the balls…Horace grabs the chair and ref Slick Johnson tries to take it away…Jarrett runs up from behind while Horace and Slick tug at the chair and lands a quick Stroke for three…He covers the downed Horace in Hulk’s colors after the match…Horace wakes up as Jarrett poses, grabs the shirt, mouths WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!, and tries to choke Jarrett with the Hulkamania shirt…Jarrett back kicks his way out of trouble and then KABONGs Horace as we cut away… Vampiro is annoyed at Sting and Sting’s stupid mask, which he glares at while sitting in his dressing room…Vamp uses his baseball bat to destroy his dressing room in what I suppose should be upgraded from “annoyance” to “uncontrolled anger” at Sting… After a break, some B-roll reminds us about Vampiro and Dale Torborg having an extremely stupid feud and Sting reinserting himself into the proceedings…Aw man, now Vamp enters the ring to blather on…Vampiro is awful, man…He’s an adequate worker, but his talking ability and character work is truly dire…He rants about Torborg and Asya and Sting for a bit before the lights go out…They come up, and Asya spits mist in Vamp’s face before Torborg attacks Vamp with a baseball bat…The lights go out again, and Torborg and Asya vanish…A guy in a Sting mask and a hood stands in the catwalk and points threateningly at Vampiro's dumb ass...Yep, let’s plop this one on the Worst Feuds list… Gene Okerlund interviews Lance Storm and Billy Kidman…Storm is taking over the departed Chris Benoit’s “Pure Sports” gimmick…Kidman doesn’t do a good job of explaining why he’s not a Filthy Animal anymore…After the babyfaces leave, the camera goes sideways and clatters to the ground…Kanyon’s face pops up on the camera…BANGGGGG, Kanyon got another one… After the break, Kanyon prepares to sneak up on someone else, but Shane Douglas walks up and praises Kanyon’s book…A gratified Kanyon signs Douglas’s copy of the book while Douglas lets slip that Buff Bagwell is supposedly talking shit about how the Blockbuster is better than the Kanyon Cutter…Kanyon walks off to confront Buff…Douglas, who was apparently inspired by M.I. Smooth's plan-making skills on the previous Nitro, cackles with glee that he was able to trick Kanyon into doing his bidding and tosses the book in a trash can… Next up: Lance Storm and Billy Kidman vs. Juventud Guerrera and Rey Misterio Jr. (w/Filthy Animals)…Storm rolls Juvi into a half-crab early, but Rey quickly lands a diving lariat to break things up…We get lots of quick tags and even quicker counters…Kidman goes up next to try and dive on Juvi, but Rey trips him, then tags in and hits the top-rope bulldog that he’s won titles with…And won titles off Kidman with, as a matter of fact…It only gets two this time, though… Kidman is the FIP, but he’s able to dropkick Juvi out of the air on a dive and manage a hot tag…Storm should take the handspring lariat out of his arsenal…The match breaks down…Juvi steps to the side on a Storm springboard crossbody attempt…Rey and Juvi work Kidman over, but Kidman kicks out of a guillotine legdrop to the nads…Kidman tries to fight back, but he stumbles into a Juvi Driver, also for two…All these nearfalls give Storm time to recover…Juvi tries a Juicy Elbow, but is springboard dropkicked by Storm…Kidman and Storm combine on a gutwrench powerbomb/top-rope splash combo for three…This booking of Rey like some kind of midcard job guy is so awful…The match was solid, though…All the matches so far have been solid tonight…Well, except for the one involving The Perfect Event… Kanyon busts into the Cat's office and asks for a match against Buff, which the Cat grants… Paisley walks to the ring alone to face off with the whole dang group of Filthy Animals…I thought this was a mixed tag match, but apparently, it’s just a singles match between Paisley and Tygress…I’m not going back on the timeline to see if I misheard or if WCW’s creative were the ones to fuck up…The ref ejects the rest of the Animals when they surround Paisley and try to intimidate her…This match is what it is…It’s about the level of a typical The Perfect Event match…OK, not really...But I mean, I really cannot stand Stasiak, and Palumbo isn’t any good either…Also, this was at least shorter than the typical TPE match…Paisley wins it with a simple body slam while some dudes in the crowd chant WE WANT PUPPIES…I blame Jerry Lawler for this…Tygress jumps Paisley from behind after the match…OK, this mini-feud is over now…I decree it… The Franchise gets his wish: Buff Bagwell wrestles Positively Kanyon next…Kanyon rips DDP’s book away from a plant and tears it up…Buff grabs a mic and dresses down Kanyon for not being able to wrestle (hypocrisy at its finest), being ugly (dude looks average to me), and having a "shitty hairdo" (ooh, a cuss! also, it’s supposed to be shitty because it’s colored like DDP’s hair, so really, that was an insult of Page)…Kanyon attacks, but Buff eventually dodges, dances, and hits some of the loosest offense I’ve ever seen in my life… Kanyon does finagle a side Russian leg sweep on a Buff duckdown that gets two…He tries a top rope suplex, but Buff ducks it away…Kanyon knows a Blockbuster is coming, so he gets up and lands a Kanyon Cutter on ref Charles Robinson…The red-haired ref has a name!...It’s Jamie Tucker…He walks down and DQ’s Kanyon…Buff gets a couple of visual three counts on Kanyon while dodging Kanyon attacks, but is eventually felled by a brick attack to the neck…Kanyon retrieves the mic and reads a mock chapter of his book…He only gets through a line or two before Booker T. rushes the ring to make the save…He rolls Kanyon, lands an axe kick, and tosses the DDP wannabe to the floor before helping Bagwell up and doing Buff’s dance with him… Scott Steiner (w/Midajah) faces Mike Awesome in tonight’s main event…I don’t understand why they’re running this matchup right before it’s supposed to be one of the semi-mains on their upcoming PPV…Then again, as the bell rings to begin the bout with just over five minutes left in the broadcast, probably it doesn’t matter…Steiner immediately bosses an obligabrawl…They brawl through the crowd…Awesome is able to get a few shots in with a chair before taking things back to the ring…He lands a diving lariat, then follows up with a running splash for two…Awesome goes up again, but is quickly caught and super overhead belly-to-belly’d to the mat…Steiner follows with a couple of punches and an overhead suplex, then calls for and locks on the Steiner Recliner…The Cat walks out and demands that the ref breaks the hold since, oh yeah, the Cat banned it…The Cat side kicks the ref out of the ring, hits Steiner with the U.S. title, rips off his shirt to reveal a ref shirt underneath, and then counts the pinfall as Awesome covers…The Cat and Awesome stomp out the downed Steiner as the show ends… Oh wow, another decent show!...I can see the light at the end of this two-year-long tunnel of suck that WCW’s been traveling down…WOO… 1
twiztor Posted December 6, 2024 Posted December 6, 2024 4 hours ago, SirSmUgly said: Thunder Interlude – show number one hundred and sixteen – 28 June 2000 This booking of Rey like some kind of midcard job guy is so awful… my headcanon is that when he lost his mask (appropriately timed comment, since @BobbyWhioux just mentioned being there live!), the Rey we knew and love was switched with an alternate universe Rey. When WWE put the mask back on him, it triggered a slingshot effect and brought our Rey back to this universe. That conveniently retcons the entire Filthy Animals era out of continuity. 3 1
SirSmUgly Posted December 6, 2024 Author Posted December 6, 2024 Show #247 – 3 July 2000 "The one with the torn taint spot" Six more days, you over-the-hill, follicly-challenged loser! Review: Nitro has been alright lately, including last week’s episode, Vince Russo will be back to assert his stupidity soon enough. The Cat explains his recent rulings as the commish to Eric Bischoff over the phone; the unseen Bischoff is apparently displeased with his recent rulings w/r/t Mike Awesome. Speaking of Awesome, he rushes into the office and says something vaguely threatening, but nonsensical; we cut to a bunch of ambulances parked outside the arena. Tank Abbott makes his way onto the set rocking a Three Count t-shirt; he backs DJ Ran away from the turntables, says the first funny thing he’s ever said for his whole WCW tenure (“I guess DJ Ran lived up to his name”), and then calls himself DJ Tank before introducing “the greatest rock ‘n roll band in the history of the world,” Three Count. Three Count comes to the ring and starts to talk, but Tank interjects from his spot at the booth with a HEY HEY HEY HEY HEY…SHUT UP AND SING. Holy shit, is Tank Abbott a plus on these shows now? I cannot believe how enjoyable this very dumb turn in Tank’s character has been. There’s a lot of bad dancing that brings me deep joy before the Jung Dragons cut in and go at Three Count for an opening trios tag. The Dragons clear the ring, and Shane Helms sells a shoulder injury so that a trainer can haul him away from the ringside area and an irate Tank Abbott can take his place. The match settles down in the ring, where Jimmy Yang plays FIP before managing to hit a facebuster out of the wheelbarrow position on Shannon Moore. Kaz tags in, but quickly wipes out on a corner charge. The limber members of the teams hit dives on one another until Jimmy Yang tries one, at which point Tank Abbott cuts him off and smacks him with a right hand; Moore slides back into the ring for the cover. Tank demands that Three Count perform on demand, maybe as reciprocity for his services; then, he gets on his square and does the worst running man in the history of the world. I mean, the Charming Uniquity list was made for matches and segments like this. Kevin Nash arrives and is told that by a tech the video package he requested has been produced; the Cat tells the injured Jung Dragons that he has a proposition for them; Goldberg shows up and is eternally smoldering with anger. Mike Awesome bumps into a tech and powerbombs the guy through a table. Man, everyone is enraged tonight, huh? Hype package: The Outsiders were a fun tag team, right? Wouldn’t you like to see them ride together again, WCW fans? Hahaha, too bad, nope! I do get a kick out of WCW teasing Scott Hall appearances for six or eight months after his last WCW appearance before firing him, though. Goldberg busts in on the production truck and politely asks them to stop the hype package. No, wait, that's not right. What actually happens is that he yells at them, the threat of mass production-tech violence implicit. Nash sees this on a monitor and seems displeased. Bill Goldberg walks to the ring and complains about all this Outsider hype. He’s a fan of neither Kevin Nash nor Scott Hall. Goldberg rightly points out that Hall and Nash tried to destroy WCW, which Scott Hudson is confused by for some reason. Scott Hudson is bad at his job. Why did he get so much love, including from me? Maybe he just needs to be on PBP and not color. Anyway, Goldberg is annoyed that everyone cheers for the Outsiders, then says WHAT ABOUT ME? WHAT ABOUT RAVEN GOLDBERG? Goldberg lets the crowd know that he’s going to be putting the Outsiders out of wrestling thanks to the fans having poor taste in rooting interests; Nash’s theme music cuts him off. Nash has TWO FOUR WORDS FOR YA. OK, so here are Nash’s four words, spoken across two phrases: IT’S MY TIME + WHY WAIT?! Man, WCW wrestlers are worse at math than even I am. The Cat comes out and demands that the show goes to commercial as security holds Nash back from getting at Goldberg. During the break, a bunch of midcarders had to come out to hold everyone back; Awesome joined them and powerbombed a security dude just for the fuck of it all. Ah, I see. Awesome is filling the ambulances. Two have left with Awesome Bomb victims; there are two more still parked at the arena. The Cat is engrossed in another phone conversation with an unseen Bischoff; he tells Bisch that he’s going to do what he can to keep Goldberg and Nash from getting at one another before their PPV meeting, for which these low-intelligence rubes will have to pay extra to see. The Cat's viewpoint, not mine. Terry Funk tells Johnny the Bull that his next opponent is tough, so he’d better get ready. Then, he hits the Bull in the back with a chair and is, apparently, that tough opponent that the Bull must face. The match started in the back and is now in the ring, which was the decree a few weeks ago and also explains why Vito has not lost his Hardcore Championship to the Bull or the Jung Dragons over the past couple of weeks – those matches started in the ring, after all. Anyway, this one makes it to the ring, where Funk is pretty enjoyable, yelling YOU S’POSED TA BE TOUGH, C’MON YOU SON OF A BITCH while first paintbrushing and then tossing overhand lefts at the Bull. Funk beats the shit out of this guy inside and outside of the ring before the Bull is finally able to smack a chair back into Funk’s face. The Bull makes a comeback using the chair and then drops Funk with a piledriver onto a chair out in the middle of the crowd. The Bull lands a vertical suplex on Funk at ringside, then places the chair on a bleeding Funk’s face. I believe this is where the Bull earns a torn urethra by then springboard legdropping Funk outside the ring. The Bull reaches for his taint almost immediately after landing. I mean, this poor bastard is fucking HURT, my GOD. He’s got me clutching in pain. He barely gets Funk over on a small package, but Funk kicks out for some reason, the cruel bastard, and then kicks out again on a chair shot to the head. This is excruciating to watch, man. Holy hell. The Bull finally lands a DDT on the chair for three, but somehow, I don’t think he’ll be making it to Bash at the Beach to face Vito. The Bull grabs painfully at his destroyed crotch as Funk helps him up. What a stupid fucking experience. This has got to go on one of these lists. Yeah, I think this was straight-up good because of the storyline around it and also because that shoot injury actually added some drama to this match. A ref and a trainer carry the Bull out as the desk moves things along to the next segment. Earlier today, Dale Torborg and Asya were “rehearsing a new entrance,” which I know is a thing that happens, but which is immersion breaking when Tony S. says it outright, and we see video of pyro going off in the exact spot where Asya poses on the stage. She plummets to the concrete floor below and, according to commentary, is in the hospital, with the implication that Vampiro fired off that pyro blast. We cut back to real time, where Torborg is leaving the arena to go to the hospital. A hooded figure in a Sting mask stops Torborg and hands him the KISS Demon costume; Torborg accepts it before walking away. The hooded figure unmasks to reveal a pleased Vampiro, but I’m guessing that Vampiro would be far less pleased if he looked behind him and saw a second hooded figure, implied to be the Stinger, observing him. I unreservedly hate this feud and this storyline. The Cat is a bit too familiar with Goldberg; he barges into Goldberg’s dressing room and claims that Nash left the building, and that’s for the best anyway since Bischoff doesn’t want them to face off until Bash at the Beach. Goldberg calmly reiterates his desire to fight Nash on this Nitro rather than waiting for Sunday. No, wait, that's also not right. What actually happens is that he explicitly threatens the Cat with violence unless he gets Nash in the ring tonight. O’Haire and Jindrak are on a roll; can they put away General Rection and Cpl. Cajun (w/Major Gunns)? Weirdly, the winners of this match gets a tag title shot on the upcoming Nitro, but we just saw Rection and Stash beat the tag champs in a non-title match. Really, this should be Rection and Stash against O’Haire and Jindrak, though it makes even more sense for Rection and Stash just to get a title shot outright considering their non-title victory. Oh yeah, there’s a match. It’s fine! Cajun gets his ass beat as the FIP after an opening flurry from the misfits. Cajun is able to hit a headscissors after being shot into the ropes, but O’Haire pulls him away from the hot tag. Rection’s dumb ass spends time yelling at the ref, which makes the ref miss Cajun’s small package on Jindrak that gets a visual three count. Cajun is able to dodge a double-team move shortly after and get a hot tag; Rection clears the ring and tries to go up for a moonsault, but he gets electric chair dropped by Jindrak. O’Haire goes up for a splash, almost falls, and barely balances for a splash that he hits. Rection kicks out, and Cajun comes back into the ring, disposes of O’Haire, and hits Jindrak with a Whiplash 2000; Rection completes the victory by landing a follow-up No Laughing Matter for three. The Perfect Event hits the ring and destroys all four men with Lex Flexers after the match. TPE poses, but all four men get back up and are joined by Loco and Stash, all of whom batter TPE. Even Gunns gets a shot in. The Cat rushes into Nash’s locker room and tries to tell the guy that Goldberg has vacated the premises, but Nash isn’t buying it and threatens the physical safety and well-being of the Cat if he doesn’t get a match against Goldberg on this very show. Mike Awesome powerbombs another tech through a table; the Cat, in a panic, calls Bischoff and asks to cut both Nash and Goldberg before they can attack him. Bischoff isn’t in agreement with that, but suddenly, the Cat gets an idea. Wow, M.I. Smooth has done his part to improve the critical thinking skills of these fellas in the New Blood! Jeff Jarrett has managed to avoid being booked in a world title defense so far tonight, for which he has Goldberg and Nash to thank. Jarrett had better hope that Nash and Goldberg keep the Cat preoccupied, though if the Cat’s big idea involves Jarrett defending his title somehow, that would be genuinely funny. The champ grabs a mic; I can sum up his promo as mostly him saying AIN’T I GREAT? He also makes fun of Hulk Hogan for being old. Then, Jarrett introduces a trio of ladies dressed as Vikings. I cannot believe that Madden says this about the ladies: HEY, THE BIGGER THE WAISTBAND, THE DEEPER THE QUICKSAND. Can you imagine putting Madden and Lawler on color as part of a three-person commentary team in a late ‘90s wrestling company? It would be pure hell. I assume that Jarrett, after making a bunch of fat jokes, will be KABONGing at least one, and possibly all three of these ladies. Jarrett is a diabolical mic worker, by the way. The ladies sing NA NA NA NA, HEY HEY HEY, GOODBYE for a minute; a guy in a suit who is apparently a member of Turner S&P enters the ring to cut the fat jokes; someone cuts Jarrett’s mic. I’m in hell. Jarrett KABONGs the S&P guy. Well, it wouldn’t be Nitro if it didn’t drop a Dirt Worst-level segment at least every show or three. Wait, now the Cat walks out with a mic. He passes Jarrett on the ramp to make his proclamation; there will be a twenty-man battle royal including Nash and Goldberg, and they’ll have to get rid of everyone else in the ring if they want to go one-on-one with each other. After a commercial break, we see the third ambulance drive off with that third WCW tech that Awesome powerbombed. Tony S. notes that three techs, Asya, and Johnny the Bull have all gone to the hospital, and I think we’ve really trivialized the last of those people tearing their urethra in a big spot by lumping him in with all the worked injuries. Jeff Jarrett bickers with the Cat backstage, releasing his pent-up anger over being booked in so many title matches recently. That’s probably a bad idea considering that the Cat is, you know, a vengeful guy wielding the power of the WCW Commissioner’s office! Shane Douglas wrestles Booker T., who will suddenly be the WCW World Heavyweight Champion by next week. Who would have possibly guessed that after the past eight months of awful booking for this guy? It’s impressive that he’s stayed over even through all of it. Kanyon jumps Booker in the aisle before Book even gets in the ring; Douglas distracts the ref while it happens. Kanyon tosses Book into the ring, where Douglas easily controls as the bell rings. Douglas lands a front suplex, a pair of neck snaps, and some stomps in the corner. He shoots Booker in; Book ducks a clothesline, then slides under the ropes and hits Kanyon, which allows Douglas to come outside and hit him from behind. Back in the ring, Douglas stomps and chokes until Book makes a comeback, first with a sunset flip for two and next with a flying forearm and an axe kick. Book hits a Spinaroonie and lands a Houston Side Kick, which draws Kanyon onto the apron. Book goes over, but he’s simply baiting Douglas into rushing him. Booker steps to the side, lets his enemies collide, and then tries to get Douglas up for a Book End that Douglas doesn’t understand the concept of going up for. Man, Shane Douglas sucks. Kanyon and Douglas beat down Book after the match; whither art thou, Buff? Not bothering to save the guy that saved you is definitely a choice for a babyface. The KISS Demon is back and only Tony S. gives a shit, but in fairness, he’s being paid to care. The Cat tries to enlist help from the heel midcarders for his battle royal; he tells them to beat down Nash and promises them bonuses if they keep Nash and Goldberg from getting at one another. Recap: This Vampiro/Torborg/Demon/Sting thing is getting too much fucking TV time tonight. Speaking of guys who suck, here’s Vampiro! Actually, Shane Douglas was decent at one point, I guess. Vampiro would be okay if he had someone talking for him. Come to consider it, that also sorta describes Douglas. I think Douglas got over in ECW by cussing a ton, which is basically what constituted the concept of “good mic work” to a lot of ECW fans. There’s a production snafu and the Road Report audio plays for a few seconds. So, Vamp’s out here, and next up is the KISS Demon. They have a cromulent match before a bunch of hooded figures wearing Sting masks walk to the ring. Vampiro is distracted by the hooded figures, but he’s not too distracted to go up for a fucking uranage, unlike Shane Douglas. The Demon gets three off that move; the hooded figures surround Vampiro in the ring. The lights go out, and when they come back on, Vampiro has disappeared before the figures can go to town on him with their baseball bats. Sting deserves so much more better than this. M.I. Smooth shares with the midcarders part of a strategy that he has for the battle royal their upcoming tag match against Lance Storm and Billy Kidman; Tygress is the key to his plan, which makes me somewhat doubt his plan, even as good as his track record has been so far. The Cat tries to enlist help from the babyface midcarders for his battle royal; he calls Kidman a virgin, which seems less effective than simply offering him a bonus. The Cat verbally destroys Kidman as they banter back and forth. Also, this was pre-taped because the Bull is in this locker room right now, urethra completely untorn. Booker gets in the Cat’s face and stirs the resolve of the rest of these babyfaces, something which that chump weakling Kidman could never manage to do. They back the Cat out of their locker room. Dopey David Flair continues to lie to a slightly-more-dopey Daffney, who is in complete denial about the state of her relationship. He takes a peek at a wedding skirt-clad Hancock on the monitor while also trying to convince Daffney that he still wants to get married. Daffney, you can see this big-ass monitor; I know you can. Look at who is on the monitor, dammit! They really should have gotten a smaller monitor for this segment. This one is damned near as large as the TurnerTron. In the ring, Hancock considers how naked she’d like to be both tonight and at the PPV. This gets an obvious pop from the fellas in the crowd. Crowbar sneaks into the ring holding a chair as Hancock dances. Crowbar dances in the ring behind Hancock before accosting her and seating her in the chair. Dopey Dave sees this on the monitor and fakes a sudden stomachache; he sends Daffney off for some medicine while in the ring, Crowbar threatens to shave Hancock’s hair unless Dave gets out here right the fuck now. He gives Dave until the count of ten to get out here, then counts like this: ONE, SIX, SEVEN, TE—before Dave makes it. Dave tries to back Crowbar off, but Daffney slides in behind him, hits a low blow, and pours a bottle of Pepto Bismol over his head. Crowbar has relaxed a bit and is enjoying the drama, so Hancock is able to slip from his grasp and tackle Daffney. Crowbar pulls her off, but Hancock gives him the ol’ “I might let you hit it eyes,” which allows Dopey Dave to smash Crowbar with a chair twice, first from behind, and second right in the dome. Hancock grabs the clippers and helps Dave shave Daffney’s hair. BOOOOO, please let Daffney get revenge! Seriously, I want Daffney to get revenge. This angle should be eye-rollingly bad, but I like Daffney. On his way out of the ring, Flair puts the clippers in Crowbar’s hand to frame him. Daffney, who is none too quick on the draw, the poor dear, thinks that Crowbar hacked at her hairdo. Tony S. points out that, you know, there’s video, so they should be able to get that little misunderstanding cleared up quickly. This takes the drama out of the spot, but is also so obviously a flaw in this part of the angle that I was already thinking it anyway. After the break, we see video of Crowbar chasing Daffney through the back to try and explain what happened; he is cut off by an Awesome lariat and then powerbombed through a table that still has a monitor on it. Crowbar is off the stretcher and ready to rage, but Awesome jumps him again and tosses him into the ambulance. M.I. Smooth brings Tygress into the Cat’s office so that she can seduce the commissioner. She wants to show her appreciation for his awesomeness, but in her dressing room rather than his office. The Cat cracks me up by asking Tygress if he can keep his shoes on during, then looking at his watch and saying, “I’ve got two minutes.” Holy shit, this guy cracks me up. Disco inferno and Konnan come to the ring and then interview “Billy Kidman” and “Lance Storm,” who are just Juventud Guerrera and Rey Misterio Jr. dressed up as those two babyfaces respectively. Konnan and Disco conduct an interview; Juvi wants to know where Torrie is, but Konnan dismisses his question by asserting that everyone knows that Kidman was bad at sex, so she left him. Boy, Kidman’s kayfabe sex life is apparently a disappointing disaster if you believe the heels, huh? Konnan makes reference to the Richard Gere/gerbils-in-assholes urban legend; from his hospital bed, Johnny the Bull winces in pain. Actual Lance Storm and Billy Kidman run in on this interview before Rey can really dig into his monotone Lance Storm impression, though. The teams trade two counts off an assisted moonsault and a facebuster as Madden asks where Torrie is. Wherever she is, let’s leave her there. I’m hoping that her WCW run is over, but I doubt that I’ll be so lucky. Meanwhile, Juvi is dressed as Kidman while wrestling Kidman for the second time during this Nitro run (previous time: Show #205). This is too short to be that good, but it’s pleasant enough because everyone in the ring works at a nice pace. Storm gets out of a jam as FIP by hitting a hot shot on Juvi; he manages the hot tag, and Kidman puts down both guys before the illegal man Storm lands a guillotine legdrop on Juvi for two; Rey breaks it up with a low dropkick. Rey and Juvi combine on a spike facebuster for two, but Storm breaks that pinfall up. Storm blocks a Rey rana with a powerbomb, but Juvi knocks Storm from the ring. Konnan draws the ref’s attention and slides a chair into the ring; Disco crotches a climbing Kidman up top, and Rey goes up and lands a top-rope bulldog onto the chair for three. The Animals stomp the babyfaces out post-match while the desk asks about whether or not the heels violated the commissioner’s “no interference” rule. Speaking of the commissioner, the Cat re-enters his office, tucking his shirt into his pants and muttering “That was a long two minutes.” He sits in his chair and looks at his monitor, having missed the Animals interfering to win their match, but, um, as with Daffney thinking that Crowbar shaved her head, we have tape of what actually happened. Then again, refs don’t ask for instant replay on the video board (except for Larry Zybszko), so I guess I can overlook the flaw of not simply looking at the video tape. Maybe. Vampiro has teleported back into the arena to interview with Pam Paulshock; Vamp challenges the KISS Demon to a Graveyard Match at Bash at the Beach. Why not; every show needs a piss break. We come back from break, where Pam Paulshock interviews Kevin Nash. Nash cuts a boilerplate promo on Goldberg before heading off to prepare for the battle royal. After some recap on Mike Awesome’s feud with Scott Steiner, Tony S. informs us that Steiner is suspended from WCW television until the show for attempting to use the Steiner Recliner in his match on the previous Thunder. Awesome walks to the ring starts talking before yelling at a guy who supposedly has an AWESOME IS A MULLET poster. He complains about being called a MULLET because he is not a NUGGET MULLET. Whoops, I got confused for a second, which is weird since the NUGGET thing was semi-organic and this was Awesome desperately begging, pleading, needing to be called a MULLET. Awesome calls Scott Steiner out, but of course, Scotty has been suspended. Steiner demands that the timekeeper ring the bell and the ref count Steiner out so that he can claim a cheapie victory over the WCW United States Champion. Rick Steiner gets sick of Awesome’s celebrating and hurries to the ring to beat Awesome down. The Cat sends a bunch of heel midcarders to the ring for the battle royal; however, he tells the babyfaces that their services shall not be needed until he signals them. Nash destroys all the heels, especially those shrimpy little cruiserweights. Alt-Rey Misterio Jr. is such a weakling. For some reason, the Cat sends these heels out one or two at a time. This is dumb as shit. If this whole match is a farce in kayfabe, why are eliminated wrestlers just standing at ringside instead of re-entering the ring? Nash might not wear yellow and red, but he’s basically the Hulkster at this point, killing off midcarders for his own enjoyment and fun. Get this dude the fuck out of here. I’m done with Nash on WCW television at this point. In the back, Commissioner Cat tries to hold back the babyfaces, but Booker blows past him, which inspires the rest of the babyfaces to do the same. They reach the ring and there’s a big schmozz, but Goldberg chooses to make his appearance just then. Goldberg circles the ring and waits for Nash to be distracted; then, he hits the brain shattering superkick of doom. He sets up for a spear, but the Misfits in Action pull him outside the ring, and Nash big boots him to the floor. Awful main event with a nonsensical start, middle, and finish. This is also on my Dirt Worst list. And yet, even with two Dirt Worst segments, I generally enjoyed this show. The stuff around it might have been lacking in logic, but the action was enjoyable and I was generally engaged. Ring up another one on the positive side of the ledger for Nitro! Johnny the Bull tore his taint apart to bring you success, WCW! 2.25 out of 5 Stinger Splashes. 1
zendragon Posted December 6, 2024 Posted December 6, 2024 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjC0vMIrOAk Guess Mark Madden is a Spinal Tap fan 1
twiztor Posted December 7, 2024 Posted December 7, 2024 I am glad you're finding enjoyment in these shows. I'm sure i've said before that summer 2000 is when the shows start getting tolerable again. Ironically, the stuff you seem to like (Tank Abbott/3 Count, Vito/Johnny the Bull) did nothing for me but the stuff you have no time for (Vampiro mainly. But i was pleasantly surprised with the NBT, including Stasiak) is where i found the silver lining. We can both agree on Commissioner Cat though. and Crowbar/Daffney. 2
SirSmUgly Posted December 8, 2024 Author Posted December 8, 2024 Thunder Interlude – show number one hundred and seventeen – 5 July 2000 "The WCW Gang primes the audience for Booker T.'s ascent to the main event" Four more days, you leathery walking anachronism, etc., etc….A Hulk Hogan-free WCW is not merely a dream… Recap: Nash and Goldberg are going at one another nonstop… Jeff Jarrett argues with the Cat before the show; Jarrett wants to retire the Hulkster tonight, but the Cat wants to focus the show on himself in order to garner television ratings…Jarrett, whose catchphrase used to be DON’T PISS ME OFF, proceeds to once again fail to apply this concept to other people who are in a position to fuck with him…The Cat promises to book him on tonight’s show, but the way he said it sure was tinged with maliciousness… After the show opening, Jeff Jarrett walks to the ring to talk...Jarrett is out here to take his television time, dammit!...He tries to make his own match against Hulk Hogan for later in the show…The Cat’s much improved dub plays and the commish walks onto the ramp to inform Jarrett that rather than booking Jarrett vs. Hulk, he’s booking Shane Douglas and Kanyon vs. Buff Bagwell and Booker T.…The person who scores the pinfall in that match will move on to earn a world title shot against Jarrett later in the show…The Cat also books himself in a karate demonstration segment…This man is mad with power…The Cat dances…Jarrett pouts… Other matches for tonight according to Tony S. include Disco Inferno, Rey Misterio Jr., Lance Storm, and Billy Kidman in a Four Corners Match, maybe for something, maybe not…If the winner earns something for winning other than a typical trip to the PAY WINDAH, I missed it…Mike Awesome will wrestle Rick Steiner, who I’m sure will be generous in eating offense to build Awesome for his upcoming PPV match…The KISS Demon will wrestle Vito for the WCW Hardcore Championship…Tony S. also notes that Johnny the Bull won’t be making it to Bash at the Beach to wrestle for that hardcore title…Tenay says that the Bull has suffered “very severe internal injuries”…I’ll say!...They don’t name a replacement for him yet…Finally, Nash and Goldberg are BANNED from this Thunder because of how much they want to destroy one another, so we’ll next see them at BatB… Tony S. says that the video we’re seeing next is from earlier today…The Perfect Event find a couple of tanning beds and enter them…Woody, the production tech whom TPE has been bullying, locks them into the beds and fires up the heat on the lamps… Jeff Jarrett tosses around some tables backstage in anger…In a funny little bit, Kanyon rushes in and hits a Kanyon Kutter (that’s how the auto-captioner spells it) on a nearby catering guy who is watching Jarrett’s tantrum…The reason why I find this bit funny is that after Kanyon yells BANGGGGG, from off-camera, an irritated Jarrett yells KNOCK THAT CRAP OFF, KANYON and Kanyon meekly walks away…Pretty good comedy there!... Recap: The Filthy Animals are one of the most aimlessly-booked midcard groups that I’ve ever seen…Rey and Disco shadowbox behind the big sheet that hangs in front of them during their entrance…Lance Storm enters the ring and is immediately set upon by the Animals…Kidman rushes the ring and the Animals bail as the bell sounds to officially start the match…Kidman and Storm start the match, working with pace and trading counters…Watching Storm and Kidman do a series of counter flash pinfalls makes me appreciate a guy like Eddy who makes it look natural rather than basically pinning himself as Storm does at one point during this sequence… The Animals re-enter the fray and tag in and out, working over Storm all the while…So, this is basically a tag match…Why make it Four Corners?...Ah, I see, it's a Four Corners match so that Rey and Disco can get mad at one another about a misaligned double-teaming attempt…Rey lands a DDT on Disco…Storm tags himself in and gets two on a splash…Rey does that contrived legdrop spot where the opponent has to hold himself up while balancing on the middle rope…There are lots of flashy spots in this match, but it very much feels like a co-operative dance rather than a competitive fight…Storm manages to roll through and lock Disco in the half-crab for the submission before Kidman can reach him to break it up…Kidman slaps hands with Storm after the match… Gene Okerlund interviews Buff Bagwell and Booker T. in the back…Buff is already declaring that he’s the guy who is going to get the pinfall and the title shot…Booker is annoyed, but he holds it together for long enough to dap up Buff and let him go on his merry way…Booker then takes out a few notes on a book that he's writing about Kanyon…The chapters are all about how much Kanyon sucks…Also, there's one about Kanyon’s weak bowels…I think that last one is because Kanyon's shook at having to face Booker, is the implication there… An attendant finds The Perfect Event locked in their beds…They are released and appear to be, uh, slightly more red than they normally are?...The attendant, who is actually trainer Danny Young, gives up Woody’s name as the culprit… Recap: Tank Abbott destroys Jimmy Yang…Oh yeah, the Cat offered the Jung Dragons a proposition on the previous Nitro, but nothing came of it on that show…As it turns out, the proposition is that the Cat is going to perform his karate demonstration against the Dragons on this show…The Dragons work over the entirely-too-cocky Cat…The commish escapes the ring, complains about getting his ass kicked, and then suckers them into bowing to him when he re-enters…He cheap shots them all as they bow and then cheats as much as possible to fight them all off….He stomps toes and claws poor Kaz in the balls….The Cat clears the ring and ends the demonstration…He asks the crowd to applaud his opponents before insulting a lady in the crowd and celebrating… The Perfect Event busts into the production truck and threatens Woody…They demand that Woody meet them in the ring…Woody readily agrees…He seems awfully sure about his ability to stand up to these fellas…Hmmmm… Backstage, the Cat appreciates the Jung Dragons for helping him get back into fighting shape…He gives them a wad full of big bills for their assistance…The Dragons go from looking pissed to looking gratified… After some video of Asya getting pyro’d off the stage, we see Vito trying to find the KISS Demon…He locates the casket and hits it with his kendo stick, but the Demon’s not there and attacks from behind…They garbage brawl through the back and toward the ring…You know what you’re getting, though the Demon lands a butterfly suplex and a second-rope elbow in the midst of all the trash wrestling…Vampiro walks onto the ramp with a shovel as the Demon scores a couple of two counts…As the Demon poses, Vamp breaks the shovel over the Demon’s back…Since this is a no disqualification match by nature, Vito simply makes the cover for three…I do like that he eyeballs Vampiro, who slowly backs away, and even covers the Demon in a way that he can keep his eyes on this face-painted weirdo…Vito leaves with his gold…Vampiro unfortunately sticks around to threaten the Demon, but at least his stick work is only a couple of sentences… Mike Awesome, in his interview with Gene Okerlund, unfortunately talks for more than two sentences…Awesome declares himself to be two wins, zero losses against Scott Steiner…Okerlund objects since Steiner wasn’t in the building on Nitro for his count-out loss…Awesome cues up some video in which he’s spliced Scott Steiner walking away from the ring into the tape of him standing in the ring during the fraudulent count-out…Also, they try to get I AM NOT A MULLET over…This is the most shameless of Russo’s attempted reproductions of something that got over in the WWF…Just completely manufactured stuff… Kanyon and Shane Douglas argue over which one of them will be getting the pinfall tonight…Kanyon prepares a surprise Kanyon Kutter, but Douglas is too aware to fall for that nonsense… Recap: The Perfect Event is a dick to this Woody guy for no damn reason… The lesser Thrillers come to the ring…I like O’Haire, Jindrak, and Mike Sanders…Palumbo and Stasiak are dead weight, though…Stasiak tries to insult Woody, but he’s a slowpoke and has to stop for a few seconds to figure out what string of insults that he should send Woody’s way…Woody enters the ring shirtless…He squares up, but then introduces Brian Adams as his partner…Clarke is nowhere to be seen…The juiced audio is really annoying, by the way…Adams kicks the hell out of these dudes until TPE can get double him up for a couple of minutes…They set Adams up for a suplex, but Woody hops in the ring and slaps their sunburns…That allows Adams to get free and go back to annihilating these chumps…Woody helps Adams hit a High Times on Stasiak, then the little guy pins Stasiak for three… Vito sees Terry Funk arrive at the show and hides behind a corner, then blindsides the Funker with a belt shot and beats him down…After the break, Vito leaves the building, yelling about how he runs this hardcore division as he exits… Shane Douglas and Kanyon versus Booker T. and Buff Bagwell posits the following question: Which team will be the more dysfunctional one?...Booker and Kanyon go at it…Booker controls, and I’m thinking, hey, they wouldn’t put Kanyon over Booker and then put Booker over Jarrett at BatB, right?....I mean, if they were going to have Booker beat Kanyon in his first defense after a loss to him at BatB, that would make sense, but I can’t see them doing that…Further, why would anyone ever tag out of this match?...WCW loves its tag bouts where the wrestlers in the ring should never tag out…It feels like 1996 in this ring right now…Shane Douglas refuses to tag in…I’ll be charitable and say that he's trying to avoid wrestling Buff when Buff’s on his feet…Yep, he only calls for a tag after Kanyon drops Buff, but Kanyon responds with a rude gesture… Buff back elbows his way out of a Kanyon corner charge and hits a Vader Bomb for two…Bagwell goes up and lands a Blockbuster, but Douglas makes the save and knocks Buff to the floor, where he pursues Bagwell…On Buff’s way out of the ring, Booker makes a blind tag and scores a Book End (which Tenay explicitly names for maybe the first time on one of these shows) on a woozy Kanyon for three…Buff and Book slap hands and do Buff’s dance…Lots of hand-slapping between babyfaces who are in competition with one another tonight… We join a Misfits in Action huddle…Apparently, Lt. Loco is defending the WCW World Cruiserweight Championship against Juventud Guerrera at Bash at the Beach...But tonight’s orders, according to Rection, are for Loco and Gunns to face Juvi and Tygress in a mixed tag match later tonight… Hype package: Jeff Jarrett will face Hulk Hogan for the big gold in just a few days…And then the REAL match for the big gold will happen after that…I am joyous about this…When it happened, I was paying just enough attention to WCW that it was one of the best surprises in pro wrestling I’ve ever had…Booker’s elevation to the main event is what brought me back to watching Nitro and Thunder every week until the company was sold to Vince McMahon… An injured Crowbar hobbles into the arena…Daffney sullenly watches him through a window, then enters behind him…She wears a red wig and a shirt that says STEPCHILD on it, but the wording on the shirt was only the second thing I noticed about it…Fuck you, I’ll settle down when I’m good and ready!... Meanwhile, Mike Awesome sneaks into Rick Steiner’s dressing room and sprays an unknown substance on his sunglasses… Back in the ring, Major Gunns and Lieutenant Loco enter to face Juventud Guerrera and Tygress, the latter of whom get the good ol’ jobber entrance…I’m looking forward to Loco/Juvi, which I hope opens the show and brings back the opening-match cruiserweight magic of 1996 WCW…Heenan makes fun of Juvi’s pants…They’re pretty much the same wide-legged red pants Jake Roberts wore back in his pre-WWF territorial days… Loco controls Juvi, who scrambles for a tag to Tygress…Loco tags Tygress in, so Tygress tags Juvi in…Gunns doesn’t tag back out…She tries to kick Juvi in the balls, who catches her foot, makes to strike her, and stops…Gunns swings a leg again and catches him in the junk…This stinks, but whatever, it’s not making me feel dead inside…The ladies have a catfight…They do some work in the ring that sets back women’s wrestling a good decade or so…Can you believe that this stupid-ass company didn’t have any creative plans for Mona?...If you want to put women in the ring, keep Mona around!...Also, I could be looking at Mona right now while also appreciating her prowess as a wrestler…Hey, I can indulge in the male gaze and appreciate someone’s well-honed skills at the same time!...I said FUCK YOU, I’LL SETTLE DOWN WHEN I’M GOOD AND READY…*ahem*…Juvi pins Loco after a belt shot and takes said cruiserweight belt with him on the way out… Rick Steiner prepares for his match by putting his t-shirt and sunglasses on…Whatever is on the glasses sends him rushing for the sink and pouring water in his temporarily blinded eyes… Booker T. rejoins Gene Okerlund for an interview about his upcoming title shot…Booker is excited about maybe becoming the champ tonight…Eh, give it a few more days, dude… Hype video: Vampiro is doing a mediocre Satanic Undertaker deal with fewer crucifixions and more torchings…It’s very bad...For me, this Vampiro run illustrates how talented Calloway and Pringle were at getting over the mass of goofy creative they were given…It takes a ton of talent to make these types of storylines work, and Vampiro’s not even close to talented enough to get this stuff over in my opinion… Mike Tenay interviews Jim and Debra Duggan in a pre-taped segment…Duggan sells cracked ribs and internal bleeding, but not any kidney damage…He also puts over the emotional turmoil of almost being murdered by Goldberg…He talks through why he took the match…Pretty much it’s 1) the Cat’s twerpy ass challenged him and 2) it’s not like he’s not a big dude who has won a lot of matches in his career…Fair!...He claims that he’ll be standing up for decency in WCW and plans to do so even after Russo is gone…Thank goodness Russo will be outta here soon…Duggan has been really effective in this role over the past couple of weeks… Crowbar tracks down David Flair backstage and kicks the hell out of him as Hancock jumps out of the way…Crowbar beats him toward the ring, but Hancock chases after them holding the pipe that Crowbar dropped as he jumped Dopey Dave… Gene Okerlund interviews a fuming Jeff Jarrett…Jarrett threatens Booker, the Hulkster, and the Cat… Recap: Dopey Dave is a two-timing piece of shit, man… Crowbar has beaten Dave out onto the stage and punches him onto the ramp, where Dave rolls head over feet down the ramp and toward ringside…I guess this is a match because Crowbar hits a splash for two once the proceedings reach the ring…Dave manages to crotch Crowbar to get some breathing room…Dave lands chops and punches, then manages a superplex…Crowbar surreptitiously wriggles into position to take a Figure Four…Dave locks it on as Hancock power walks to the ring and holds the pipe out so that Dave can hold onto it for leverage…The ref catches it and breaks the hold… Both Dave and Crowbar get in ref Billy Silverman’s face, Dave over the Figure Four being broken and Crowbar over the pace of Silverman’s count…Silverman shoves them backward into pinning combinations for two, one after the other…That’s why Crowbar was mad about Silverman’s count, by the way…Hancock gets in the ring wielding the pipe and draws Silverman’s attention, which allows Dopey Dave to land a forearm to Crowbar’s nuts…Daffney makes her way down, hops onto the apron, and tries to take the pipe away from Hancock…Hancock tumbles backward when Daffney lets the pipe go… Hancock is pissed about Daffney’s trickery and advances on her, but backs up when she sees Daffney take out some clippers…The ref watches as Daffney chases Hancock out of the ring while wielding the clippers and doesn’t see Crowbar land a pipe shot…Crowbar follows with a Mindbender for three…Crowbar wraps Dopey Dave up and threatens him with violence unless Dave admits the truth about who shaved Daffney’s head and whether or not Dave is fucking around on Daffney…Dave’s soft punk ass nods toward Hancock says SHE MADE ME DO IT about the head shaving and then admits to cheating on Daffney…Daffney slaps Dave and leaves angrily, with Crowbar chasing after her…Aw, I hope that crazy couple gets together soon… After a break, Ms. Hancock gets some treatment from the trainer…Danny Young touches her leg, trying to help her with her injury…Dopey Dave storms into the room and yells at the trainer, who says that Hancock told him that she injured her thigh…Hancock denies ever saying anything like that and gets a kick out of Dopey Dave attacking the trainer and shaving his head…Well, that's what he gets for pointing the finger at Woody... Mike Awesome faces Rick Steiner next…Steiner sells an eye injury…Awesome jumps him at the bell, but of course, ol’ Rick makes a comeback…Awesome kicks out at two after an overhead belly-to-belly suplex and takes things outside for an obligabrawl…Awesome stands a table up in the corner, then sets Steiner up for a running Awesome Bomb…Steiner slips out and shoves Awesome through the table, then grabs a chair…Slick Johnson takes the chair away, and Awesome uses that distraction to spray Rick in the eyes with that substance and land a clothesline for a quick three… Booker T. faces Jeff Jarrett for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship in the Thunder main event…I should point out that WCW creative has been pushing Booker again, particularly by positioning him as the leader of first the M.I.A. and then of all the babyfaces on the previous Nitro…What’s going to be weird is heel Russo coming out before the BatB main event and giving babyface Booker T. his props… Booker lands a shoulderblock, so Jarrett goes to Book’s eyes…Jarrett uses that to run with Book, which is a mistake…Booker wins that exchange, lariats Jarrett to the floor, and lands a double axe…Book controls an obligabrawl before tossing Jarrett back into the ring…Jarrett reverses a whip and locks on a sleeper, but Book reverses and locks on one of his own that is summarily countered by a Jarrett kneebreaker and Figure Four…Book endures and manages to finally snag the bottom rope, but Jarrett is quickly up and stomping away at his injured leg… Jarrett pulls Book to his feet and shoots him in, but he eats a Booker lariat while delivering one of his own…They’re up at six on the standing ten-count, but Book wins a punch-up, lands an axe kick, Spinaroonies up, and gets an immaculately-timed 2.9 off a spinebuster…Book lines Jarrett up for a Houston side kick, but he hangs himself up on the ropes as Jarrett dodges…Book tumbles to the floor, where Kanyon sneaks up and lands a Kanyon Kutter on Booker…Kanyon rolls Book back into the ring, where Jarrett covers for three…Fun match!...Though considering the contestants, this isn’t surprising… But wait, there's more!...Here’s the Cat…He wasn’t all tied up with Tygress, so he saw Kanyon cheat…The Cat ejects Kanyon and then re-starts the match due to Kanyon breaking his “no interference” rule…Jarrett storms up to the Cat and argues with him…Booker jumps Jarrett from behind, and the Cat runs Jarrett back into the ring…Jarrett is still preoccupied with the Cat, and Booker rolls him up from behind for two…Jarrett is simply trying to survive, but he’s thrown off and runs himself right into a powerslam… Book goes up for a missile dropkick and scores it for two when Jarrett is able to reach the ropes with his hooked leg…Jarrett runs right into ref Charles Robinson and is then hit with a Book End for a visual three count…The Cat takes a KO'd Charles Robinson’s shirt for himself as Booker counters a belt shot with a side kick for another 2.9…Jarrett’s timing is absurd…Jarrett grabs his guitar, backdrops a charging Booker, and KABONGs referee Cat before grabbing his belt and taking the DQ loss…That was the good type of fuckery, IMO…I dug it a lot… The Crowbar/Daffney/Dopey Dave/Hancock love rhombus and the Booker/Jarrett main event put this show over the top for me…It wasn’t very good in the first hour, but got better and better it went on…WOOO… 2
BobbyWhioux Posted December 8, 2024 Posted December 8, 2024 (edited) 1 hour ago, SirSmUgly said: Jeff Jarrett tosses around some tables backstage in anger…In a funny little bit, Kanyon rushes in and hits a Kanyon Kutter (that’s how the auto-captioner spells it) on a nearby catering guy who is watching Jarrett’s tantrum…The reason why I find this bit funny is that after Kanyon yells BANGGGGG, from off-camera, an irritated Jarrett yells KNOCK THAT CRAP OFF, KANYON and Kanyon meekly walks away…Pretty good comedy there!... I was weary of DDP at the time (blame contemporary internet wrestling nerd groupthink) so I absolutely ate up the Positively Kanyon schtick. But even within that, this was solid gold from Jarrett. Like Double J bringing the slightest sliver of Lance Russel to WCW TV. Edited December 8, 2024 by BobbyWhioux 1
SirSmUgly Posted December 9, 2024 Author Posted December 9, 2024 Bash at the Beach 2000 notes: The day is finally here, everyone! This show feels like the start of the final chapter in WCW’s story. I know that Russo is around for another couple of months, but we’re going to be in the end game once this show ends. The Cat arrives and tells his chauffeur M.I. Smooth to gather the Filthy Animals and the Misfits in Action and tell them that they need are banned from ringside for tonight’s cruiserweight title match. Suddenly, Generic East Asian Track #544 plays and the Jung Dragons jump in from nowhere to attack the Cat. They fail miserably in said attack. It’s funny how much of this show is built around a couple of guys who won’t be showing up on television again any time soon in Scott Hall (with his contract being the focal point of the Goldberg match) and Hulk Hogan (hahahahaha Russo with a brief babyface turn, ahahahahaha). Juventud Guerrera (w/Lt. Loco’s Cruiserweight Championship, the rest of the Filthy Animals) enters the ring to try and capture the title for real and for true. I guess M.I. Smooth fell asleep in the back before he could find the Animals. Konnan and Disco do a bit of mic work while Hudson’s stupid ass tries desperately to get the “it was worth a single chuckle the first time I heard it” nickname “Dim Shady” over. God, Hudson sucks. Yeah, Smooth clearly didn’t find anyone backstage before this opener because Lt. Loco is here with the rest of the Misfits in Action. Refs Charles Robinson and Jamie Tucker finally get everyone except for the competitors in the match to leave ringside. Rey gives his buddy Juvi a quick hug before finally vacating the premises. Madden and Hudson argue over whether this show features wrestling or sports entertainment. Please hire Dusty back and get he and Stevie Ray out here on color instead. I beg you, WCW. Please. Loco wins the first fast-paced opening exchange with a lariat that sends Juvi to the floor. Juvi stalls a bit and sells a leg injury. Juvi stalls some more. I’m not against Juvi stalling in principle, but it’d be cool to get a cruiserweight opener that is all action in 2000. Loco chases Juvi and suplexes him out of the ring and to the floor, then hits a springboard dive. Back in the ring, Loco stalks Juvi, who suckers him in and uses his pants as leverage to pull him face-first into the turnbuckle. Juvi lands ten punches in the corner and thrusts his junk in Loco’s face. He walks around the ring slowly, talking shit, and turns right into a series of Loco moves that end in a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Loco locks on an arm bar, and this is not the match I think these two should be having at all. It’s a real bummer, man. When the stablemates for both men were barred from ringside, I thought that we might just get pure WCW cruiserweight pacey wrestling. We have not gotten that at all. Loco slowly chops Juvi, and they dodge one another on corner charges before landing stereo lariats and sparking a standing ten count. Both men stand up and do some rope running that ends with Loco depositing Juvi to the floor and following up with a crossbody from the top rope. The Filthy Animals sneak back down the ramp wearing masks; Loco is distracted by them and gets rolled up from behind for two. Jamie Tucker unmasks them and sends them to the back as Juvi lands a slingshot guillotine legdrop to Loco out on the floor. Juvi controls an obligabrawl as I wonder why WCW can’t get out of their own way with booking some of these matches. Back in the ring, Juvi scores two on a top-rope splash; he goes up again, but Loco is playing possum as Juvi takes his sweet time and catches him up top. Juvi manages to eat a couple of Loco chops and flip over Loco’s body to score a sunset flip powerbomb for two. Juvi barely gets Loco up and ends up dumping Loco with a Northern Lights gutbuster, followed by a Juicy Elbow for two. The rest of the M.I.A. tries to sneak through the crowd while wearing masks, which draws the refs’ attention. Well, most of the M.I.A. does; Major Gunns instead walks out via the ramp and stripteases while Loco rolls up Juvi for a visual three count. Loco continues his offensive onslaught, scoring a sit-out facebuster slam for two, but he trades counters with Juvi and gets caught with a Juvi Driver that he only avoids losing to by getting a boot onto the bottom rope. Juvi is casual about following up on that move and Loco slips his grasp and scores a tornado DDT for three. So then what was the point of the M.I.A.’s diversion, which did nothing but keep Loco from winning earlier than he did? Further, why did they send Gunns out here alone if she wasn’t going to interject herself into the match while the refs were looking at the rest of the Misfits in Action? You know, it’s fine to just have two guys go move-for-move without anyone walking out here to no purpose. This match was decent enough, if disappointing. The Cat pleads with the Jung Dragons to stop attacking him; I think the implication is that the Dragons got paid off for attacking him on Thunder and have concluded that they would like to keep getting paid off. They only register the words that they did a “good job” as the Cat tells them that they were great on Thunder, but he doesn’t need them to attack him anymore. Jeff Jarrett and an opera lady bust into the Cat’s office; Jarrett demands Hogan’s presence immediately. Vito walks to the ring to defend the Hardcore Championship against the replacement for Johnny the Bull, who turns out to be Screamin’ Norman Smiley (w/Ralphus). No, wait, it turns out to be Smiley and Ralphus in a handicap match. Please stop wasting Norman Smiley, WCW. This bout is supposed to start backstage, but it doesn’t, and this isn’t helped by Tony S. pointing out that it doesn’t. Ralphus takes a couple of raps with a kendo stick and then lays around so that Vito and Smiley can do the same ol’, same ol’, first on the ramp and then backstage. Tony S. says that to win the match, they have to move back to the ring to end it. OK, let’s find out if this stipulation is held to. Ralphus shows up backstage and flattens a trash can lid over Vito’s head. Vito makes a comeback and separates Smiley from Ralphus; he walks a bleeding Ralphus back out to the ring. Remember when Ralphus was just a funny second for Chris Jericho and it wasn’t anything more than that? It was nice, wasn’t it? They were a good pairing with an odd chemistry. Now this tubby old man is bleeding for dollars in a hardcore match against Vito. Let’s just end this farce already. Vito splashes Ralphus through a table for three before Smiley can make it back to ringside. This show has been of highly questionable quality so far. Let’s pick it up, fellas. Goldberg enters the arena with yet another copy of Scott Hall’s contract, this time wedged into his pocket; meanwhile, Okerlund asks Kevin Nash about the pressure of having to beat Goldberg to reclaim the contract. For some reason, Nash calling Goldberg a “prick” and saying that he’d Jackhammer “[Goldberg’s] ass” got bleeped out. It’s PPV, you stupid motherfu*bleep*. Hype video: Dopey Dave has two-timed Daffney and hooked up with Ms. Hancock. Here are some quotes that are overlaid in text on this video exactly as they are written, and let me say in advance that I love each and every one of them: · (overlaid over footage of a happy Daffney): Once a wild eyed energetic damsel · (overlaid over footage of Ms. Hancock walking into Dopey Dave’s dressing room: Now caught up in a tangled web of deceipt [sic] and betrayal · (overlaid over footage of Dopey Dave and Hancock shaving Daffney’s head): David Flair is one two timing lowlife · (overlaid over footage of Daffney watching Dave and Hancock embrace): A long legged blue eyed flusy [sic] has intervened in the wedding plans · (under pictures of both women): You’re cordially invited to attend the Wedding Gown Match This was TREMENDOUS. I didn’t even delve into discussion of the well-chosen footage or the amazing music that accompanied this package. The misspellings only enhanced my love of this shoddily-assembled, yet hugely entertaining video package. Five stars. Ms. Hancock (w/Dopey Dave) is wearing garters and heels, which only emphasizes her comically long legs in proportion to the rest of her body. I mean, she’s obviously very attractive, but her legs are, in a good way, absurd. Dave’s actually out here in a tux; he kisses his way up her leg and to her face as Madden basically jizzes in his pants on commentary. Poor Daffney walks out here alone and enters the ring as Dave and Hancock continue to make out. She calmly takes off her shoes and ball shots Dave, then grabs Hancock. Dave corrals Daffney and holds her in place so that Hancock can land a couple of stomps. Hancock lands a not-entirely terrible Muta elbow, but she teases a Stinkface, and that fires Daffney up. It fires the crowd up, too, though in a totally different way. Look, if you’re going to have two ladies, neither of whom are particularly competent workers, wrestle a match, this is about as good as it’s ever going to be. Daffney and Hancock try to smash one another’s faces in the wedding cake at ringside; Dave jumps in to grab Daffney as Slick Johnson tries to hold Hancock back. Hancock and Daffney rip away both men's pants and leave ‘em in their briefs. This is absurd. Daffney slams Hancock's head into Dopey Dave’s sack. This is so dumb that I can’t even be mad. It’s a living Looney Tunes short, which is really the only way to book this. Dave tackles Daffney and he and Hancock try to shave the rest of her hair, but Crowbar makes the save and then takes his jeans off since all the other dudes are pants-free already anyway. Crowbar hits Dopey Dave with a Mindbender and then chokes Dave out with his jeans. Daffney prepares to shave Dave’s head, but Hancock distracts everyone by doing a striptease. Since Hancock stripped her gown away to do it, Daffney wins. As a bonus, she sneaks up behind a dancing Hancock and smashes cake in her face. Dopey Dave smashes cake in Crowbar’s face while Daffney walks around with a huge smile on her face, licking icing off her fingers. This is so fucking dumb in the best of ways. If you’re going to book this nonsense, go full-on dumbfuckery with it as the booking committee did on this show. I loved it. Let’s stick this stupid-ass match right on the Charming Uniquities list. Daffney gets attacked with some cake by Hancock, who walks off with David, and that last part kills her mood. Poor Crowbar; he tries to console her, but she sullenly walks off. Won’t she even consider requiting Crowbar’s love for her?! The Cat mumbles to himself backstage as he plots against Jeff Jarrett; the generic East Asian music plays and the Jung Dragons barely conceal themselves as they watch the Cat walk through the hall. Commentary speculates on Hulk Hogan’s whereabouts. I can’t believe that Russo got Hogan to do the whole “one guy lays down for another guy in a title match” deal twice! HAHAHAHA, Hogan, you idiot! What a rube. We’re talking about all this nonsense because the WCW crew is busy cleaning up all the cake in and around the ring. Now these fellas are talking about Kevin Nash fighting for his buddy Scott Hall’s career. They really should have planned the show sequencing out better. Finally, we get the ersatz version of ersatz “Exodus” and The Perfect Event make their way to the ring to defend their WCW World Tag Team Championships against KroniK, whose name is still spelled "Kronic" by WCW. I’ll let you know when their name is finally officially stylized as KroniK, which I’m sure anyone reading this is just dying to know. Adams and Palumbo start, and Adams shrugs off a Palumbo shoulderblock attempt, tosses Palumbo to the floor, and presses an onrushing Stasiak onto Palumbo at ringside from his spot in the ring. That ruled. Palumbo and Stasiak are rattled and consider just rolling out and taking the count-out loss, but Stasiak gets back in the ring and faces Clarke, who flicks off a squawking Palumbo at ringside before eating a couple of Stasiak punches and returning a few stomps and chops in response. Clarke lands a standing uranage, then tags in Adams and teams up on a double shoulderblock. Stasiak tries to hurt Adams on a duckdown, but runs into a big boot. Palumbo tags back in and is full nelson slammed for two. Basically, KroniK handles these fellas easily for the most part; it’s only when Palumbo pulls down the top rope as Stasiak shoots Adams in that TPE gets any control. TPE beats Adams down at ringside in an obligabrawl as Clarke draws the ref’s attention; they even get a couple of shots with a chair in. Adams is rolled back into the ring and pinned for two; he’s now your face in peril. TPE uses strikes and sleepers to cut Adams off from his corner and manages a couple of two counts in the bargain. These fellas are simply not very interesting workers. Stasiak in particular has zero ideas. Adams fights out of Stasiak’s sleeper and crashes into him on a rope run, which leads to a stereo tag. Clarke mows down Stasiak and Palumbo even though he trips at one point. Adams clears out Stasiak as Clarke tries to hit Palumbo with a Meltdown; Palumbo manages to slip out of the back and land a DDT. Palumbo tags Stasiak in, and Stasiak actually controls the ring against both Adams and Clarke. He lands a couple of dropkicks that send both KroniK members to the floor, then hits a diving lariat on Clarke outside the ring. Palumbo dispatches of Adams with a superkick as Stasiak covers Clarke for two back in the ring; TPE tries to double up on Clarke and, though Clarke blows up their initial offensive attempt, they are able to recover and strike Clarke to the mat, then land the double pancake for only two when Adams saves. Adams tosses Palumbo to the floor, then lands an F5 on Stasiak. KroniK shoot Stasiak to the corner and hit a double big boot, then call for a High Times. They land it, but Palumbo slides past Clarke and breaks Adams’s pinfall attempt. KroniK next drills Palumbo with a High Times, but Stasiak has grabbed the Lex Flexer, which he whiffs with. Adams puts Stasiak up in powerbomb position and Clarke goes up and lands a diving lariat as Adams powerbombs Stasiak for three. That match went from decent to good simply because of the finishing run. I think KroniK is a flat out good tag team. They had a good match with TPE on PPV and they had one with Vito and the Bull on PPV. You have to be good to have good tag matches with these young and inconsistent teams on PPV. WCW World Tag Team Championship title change count: 9 (VACANT > David Flair and Crowbar > The Mamalukes > The Harris Bros. > VACANT > Buff Bagwell and Shane Douglas > KroniK > The Perfect Event > KroniK)… The Jung Dragons continue to stalk the Cat in this unfortunately unfunny recurring bit. Speaking of unfunny recurring bits, Jeff Jarrett busts back in with the opera singer, but she doesn’t sing this time around. I do get a kick out of the Cat having a Magic 8-Ball on his desk. Now that’s how you make a funny implied joke about the Cat's decision-making skills! Anyway, the Dragons attack the Cat after Jarrett leaves. Positively Kanyon faces Booker T. in the next match. The only time Madden is consistently funny is when he’s talking about ghostwriting Kanyon’s autobiography: “It was a fine tale. A tale of triumph.” The men run the ropes; Kanyon scores a shoulderblock, but runs right into a dropkick. Booker controls, rips off Kanyon’s DDP shirt, and tosses Kanyon to the floor. Instead of following up, he goes over to Kanyon’s book and takes the brick out of it, then tosses it away. Smart move! I suppose Book knew that Kanyon has a low recovery stat because he goes out there and dominates an obligabrawl even with the delay. He tosses Kanyon back in the ring and follows with a diving lariat from the top for two. Alas, he relaxes a bit and gets his tights grabbed by Kanyon, who leverages him through the ropes and to the outside, where he evens up the “won an obligabrawl” tally at one apiece. I dig Kanyon as a worker, but he’s responsible for people doing spots like the one where he puts the steps on Booker’s back, then jumps off the apron with a chair shot to the steps instead of just, you know, smashing either the chair or the steps directly on Booker’s back. Just because a spot is convoluted does not make it optimal. Kanyon now takes extended control of the bout; he lands a sliding basement dropkick to the small of Book’s back, knocking him back out to ringside, and then suplexes Booker back into the ring and covers for two. Any WCW fan knows that Kanyon can’t help setting up for elaborate spots, as he does when he wedges a chair into the corner ropes. This gives Booker room to make a comeback and score a two count, but he’s shot into the corner and has to avoid crashing into the chair; Kanyon catches him on the leapfrog and hits a sit-out spinebuster for two. Kanyon steps over on an inverted Boston Crab to target Booker’s back, but Book powers out of it and rolls Kanyon up for two; Kanyon pulls Book’s tights and reverses that pinfal for two of his own. They get back to standing, where Booker manages to shoot Kanyon into the corner with the chair wedged in the ropes; he follows up with a spinebuster for two of his own, but Kanyon sneaks a boot onto the ropes to break it. Booker picks up the chair and prepares to use it, but the ref takes it away; Kanyon grabs his book and wallops Booker in the head with it for a well-timed 2.9. Book Spinaroonies up as Kanyon realizes that there isn’t a brick in the book; Book lands an axe kick and a Book End and only gets about 2.7. Booker goes up for a missile dropkick to finish Kanyon off, but Jeff Jarrett runs to the ring and KABONGs Booker with the guitar as Kanyon distracts the ref. The impact (heh) of that guitar shot helps Kanyon easily execute an elevated Kanyon Kutter for three. The desk wonders if the Cat recovered from the Jung Dragons’ beatdown on him quickly enough to see Jarrett break his “no interference” rule. That was a second very good match in a row. Mike Awesome is too busy trying to fuck the opera singer to cut his interview with Pam Paulshock. Uh oh. Anyway, Awesome promises to win a third straight match against Scott Steiner and warns Pam not to cock block him again with her average-looking ass. I mean, he didn’t say that exactly, but that was the jist of it. Look, I’m excited for Booker T. to win the big gold, but the main event of this show probably should have been heel Scott Steiner (w/Midajah) destroying Hulk Hogan cleanly for the world title rather than Steiner slumming it in the midcard against Mike Awesome for the United States Championship. Steiner attacks Awesome outside of the ring as the bell clangs and they have an immediate obligabrawl that’s pretty good because Awesome backdrops Steiner into the crowd and then launches himself into Steiner with a running lariat. Both men club one another through the crowd; I like this match starting with a ton of energy like this. They finally fight back to ringside, where Steiner tosses a chair at Awesome and then slams Awesome’s head into the ring steps before finally getting him in the ring. Steiner hits a lariat and an elbowdrop for two, then stomps and chops Awesome in the corner before shooting him into the opposite corner and running into Awesome’s upraised boot. Awesome tries to follow up, but Steiner catches him as he climbs the ropes and lands a super belly-to-belly that was so fantastic that it should have gotten three by all rights. It did not, however. Awesome takes a beating; Steiner hits a rib breaker, then tries a suplex that Awesome manages to block and reverse into a front suplex that hangs Steiner over the top rope. Awesome lands an elbow on Steiner from the apron to the floor, then grabs a chair and rams it into Steiner’s gut. The ringside brawling has been so much more energetic in this match than it usually is, but I attribute that to Awesome having lots of experience with this sort of thing. Awesome swings every possible object he can find at ringside at Steiner as ref Jamie Tucker continues to be like, Fuck it, let ‘em go. Awesome targets the small of Steiner’s back by ramming it into the apron and the guardrail. Thinking that he’s done enough damage, Awesome rolls Steiner back into the ring, but is met with a lariat that knocks him to the floor. Still, Awesome doesn’t panic; he simply reaches in the ring and trips Steiner, then slingshot splashes him for two and lands a diving lariat from the top for two more. Awesome tries a suplex of his own that gets reversed as the Cat wanders out to oversee the proceedings. Steiner manages an overhead belly-to-belly and signals for the Steiner Recliner, which is when the Cat intervenes to stop Steiner from landing the move. Steiner knocks the Cat off the apron, but this gives Awesome the space to low blow Steiner and then land a flapjack with a bridge for two. Awesome goes up to finish it and lands a top-rope splash for two more. Steiner blocks an Awesome Bomb, but in the process, the referee gets wiped out. The Cat jumps in and tries to kick Steiner, but Steiner moves and the Cat knocks Awesome down. Steiner clears out the Cat and covers; the recovering ref counts to two before Awesome kicks out. Steiner lands another belly-to-belly and calls for the Steiner Recliner once more. The Cat grabs a mic and tells Steiner that if he locks on that illegal finishing maneuver, he’ll be stripped of the United States title. Steiner, being a juiced up roid monkey who doesn’t much care for the wishes of those in authority, does it anyway. The Cat immediately tells the ref to DQ Steiner and takes the belt away from Midajah. Steiner runs to ringside, knocks down the Cat, and then suplexes Awesome right onto his neck. This match was good, but I question taking the gold off Steiner in this way. Protecting him in a loss to Awesome is a good idea, but it’s got to be a loss that at least helps Awesome come off as a bigger threat or a legit champion if he's been awarded the belt. Still, this was a hot bout. BatB’s picked it up since I demanded a better show! WCW United States Championship title change count: 5 (Jarrett > VACANT > Jarrett > VACANT > Scott Steiner > VACANT/Awesome (I’ll update this when WCW decides where they’re going with the title lineage) Well, I spoke awfully soon because Vampiro and the KISS Demon (w/Asya) have their shitty-ass Graveyard Match. The Demon and Asya unconvincingly trade dialogue about whether or not she should join him before the Demon tells ref Charles Robinson to watch out for her. They find a coffin and open it, but Vampiro’s not in there. The Demon yells AAARGH! HE’S NOT IN THERE! VAMPIRO! WHERE ARE YOUUUUU! Vampiro is in a tree nearby, and he leaps out of it and has a crappy brawl with the fucking KISS Demon in near darkness. Ah, WCW. They have matches that are total nonsense that rule (Hancock/Daffney) and matches that are total nonsense that suck (this one) all in the same two-hour block. They should have put this match on after Daffney/Hancock so they’d have something for the audience to watch while they mopped up all that cake. Let’s please just race to the finish because this absolutely blows, folks, it’s awful. Vamp dumps the Demon in a hole and absconds with Asya. The Demon digs his way out and rushes toward a nearby body of water, where Asya is laying. Vamp pops out of the water as the Demon checks on his fiancé; they splash around for a bit while an unconvincingly traumatized Asya rocks back and forth like prime Mankind. Vamp dunks the Demon’s head under water and then grabs Asya and leads her away by her hair. The Demon runs back toward the coffin; Asya is laid out next to it. Vamp pops out of the coffin, mists Demon, and yells MOMENT OF TRUTH, DALE?! YOU READY TO LIVE…OR DIE?! The Demon responds as such: NEVERRRRRRRR. Vampiro hits him in the head with a headstone and dumps him in the coffin, then rolls the coffin into an open grave. Fuck off, everyone involved. Yes, even you, Charles Robinson. Sorry I had to say it to you, Lil’ Naitch, but you were here, and you need to apologize for your participation in this nonsense. DIRT. WORST. Gene Okerlund interviews Shane Douglas about Douglas’s beef with Buff Bagwell. Okerlund doubts Douglas's claims that he carried Buff during their brief partnership, but Douglas is certain of it, and he plans to demonstrate this tonight. In fact, he guarantees victory, which suggests that he has something up his sleeve. Buff Bagwell versus Shane Douglas is next, in fact. Buff starts a FRANCHISE SUCKS chant and barks at Douglas, then responds to a shove with fists and a dropkick. Douglas tumbles to ringside, where we have yet another obligabrawl. Sorry, we had the best possible obligabrawl we could two matches ago, so this one is just going to feel mediocre by comparison. Douglas finally manages to halt Buff’s onslaught, then pulls back the mats and tries to piledrive Buff on the concrete. Buff back body drops his way out of danger and takes the match back into the ring for all of ten seconds, where he hits a neckbreaker and Douglas bails. Here we go with obligabrawl number two, which at least sees Douglas use that atomic drop into the post spot that Jeff Jarrett has used to great effect, specifically against X-Pac at SummerSlam ‘98. This match also isn’t very good, but it’s not Vampiro/Demon in a graveyard, so it feels like an improvement rather than a punishment. Well, at least somewhat. Back in the ring, Douglas works a neck vice, and DAMMIT, here comes Torrie Wilson. Torrie slaps Douglas, who stumbles backward into a Buff rollup for two. Torrie gets on the apron as Buff lands a back elbow and a Vader Bomb for two. Buff poses as Torrie gets in the ring and smooches him, then boots him in the balls as he turns around to pose some more. Douglas follows up with a Pittsburgh Plunge and has apparently badly downgraded from Francine to Torrie fucking Wilson. Buff kicks out and Douglas does the most egregious I CAN’T BELIEVE IT face this side of, well, pick any WWE main eventer at a WrestleMania from the past fifteen years. I hate this match, but I’m not sure it’s quite bad enough to put on the same list as Vampiro/Demon. Douglas kicks out of a double-arm DDT at a perfectly-timed 2.9. See? That was objectively good wrestling. Anyway, Torrie cuts off Buff during a Blockbuster attempt, but even though Buff grabs her hair and shoves her from the apron, this gives Douglas time to come over, hit a very loose inverted atomic drop, and land an inverted jawbreaker for three. I don’t remember anything about this Franchise/Torrie pairing whatsoever. Nor do I want to, honestly. Hollywood Hogan has appeared! Hooray! The quicker he gets here, the quicker his punk ass can leave. Jeff Jarrett promises that he’s got something planned for Hogan in response to a Gene Okerlund interview question before we cut to a Hogan/Jarrett feud package. Michael Buffer introduces the competitors for this particular WCW World Heavyweight Championship bout that is suspiciously early in this show! Again! If people recycled plastics like Vince Russo recycles ideas, the oceans would be free of plastic contamination. Speaking of Russo, he walks to the ring wearing a Barry Bonds jersey and holding a baseball bat before Jeff Jarrett even steps into the aisle. OK, I’m just telling you now while the entrances go on: This segment and Russo’s later follow-up promo are going on my HOLY SHIT, THAT WAS CLASSIC list. Russo burned WCW’s final bridge with Hulk Hogan, got him out of the company, and got a DSotR episode made about this show. It deserves to make it on that list. Is Russo yammering about Hogan having creative control or being a babyface and giving Booker T. a title shot even though Russo is supposed to be a heel nonsensical? Absolutely, yes. And yet, I can’t help but see this as maybe the last amazing promo/segment to ever happen on WCW programming. Hogan grabs a mic and yells the word ASS a few times as he calls Jarrett into the ring for the match. Jarrett trudges to the ring, slowly steps between the ropes, and lays down as Hudson reminds us that this happened before already at Halloween Havoc ’99. Russo offers Hogan the belt and motions for Hogan to pin Jarrett. The crowd looks baffled, which is understandable. Hogan grabs a mic and says IS THIS YOUR DEAL, RUSSO?! THAT’S WHY THIS COMPANY’S IN THE DAMN SHAPE IT’S IN. BECAUSE OF BULLSHIT LIKE THIS. He’s a-shootin’, folks! Hogan puts a boot on Jarrett’s chest, earns an easy three count, and is announced as the world champ. Unlike the tag titles or especially the United States title, both of which have been reasonably booked for months at this point, the world title is still in nutty booking hell. WCW World Heavyweight Championship title change count: 17 (Hitman > VACANT > Benoit > VACANT > Sid > Nash > Sid > VACANT > Jarrett > DDP > Arquette > Jarrett > Ric Flair > Jarrett > Nash > Flair > Jarrett > Hulk Hogan) Vampiro passes Hogan on his way back into the building. Too much Vampiro, WCW. He enters the ring, the official winner of the Graveyard Match now that he’s made it back to the ring before his opponent. Vamp rambles on about how he’s destroyed Dale Torborg and Sting both in a bad promo. Some cloaked figures in Sting masks haul a coffin toward the ring as a curious Vampiro watches. We get some Dollar Tree Undertaker nonsense as Sting attacks Vampiro and dumps him in the coffin. Or, you know, a Sting-alike. Who cares, really? Gene Okerlund interviews Goldberg, or tries to. Goldberg mostly just stares lasers through Okerlund's hairless dome before promising to make Nash suffer for his buddy Scott Hall’s career. If I didn’t know that Hall was done after SuperBrawl, I would be certain that he’d be intervening in this bout. Vince Russo walks back to the ring and plays Jeff and Susie’s kid to Hulk Hogan's Larry David by calling Hogan a BIG BALD SON OF A BITCH (I think BALD ASSHOLE would have been funnier, though). He then awards the WCW World Heavyweight Championship to Jeff Jarrett again so that Jarrett can defend it against Booker T. later tonight. I’m annoyed that the desk keeps calling this “real life” and saying that it’s “the boss Russo and not the character Russo” in the ring, but otherwise, Russo SHOOTIN’ on Hulk Hogan is hilarious, even considering the inconsistent babyface inspirational promo, unnecessary edgy teenage cussing, and shoot-bang absurdity. Though I have to say, the juiced audio clashing with the visual of the completely dead crowd behind Russo in the hard cam shot is somewhat distracting. WCW World Heavyweight Championship title change count: 18 (Hitman > VACANT > Benoit > VACANT > Sid > Nash > Sid > VACANT > Jarrett > DDP > Arquette > Jarrett > Ric Flair > Jarrett > Nash > Flair > Jarrett > Hulk Hogan > Jarrett) That Russo worked shoot promo was a statement of intent in more ways than one; it also indicates that Russo is back in control and Terry Taylor is probably going to have to keep his reasonable booking ideas to himself for the next couple of months until Russo is finally gone. I think, now that Hulk Hogan is gone from the company, it’s time to talk about him a bit. Sure, Bischoff is gone, too, but he’ll be back on the penultimate Nitro by phone, and I’ll save my final thoughts on him for then (not that they’ll be super-extensive). Neither are my thoughts on Hogan very extensive. He was undeniably important for giving WCW mainstream cred as a competitor to the WWF and his heel turn rejuvenated him and got the nWo the rest of the way over in 1996. However, except for the just about the first six months after the heel turn – and I might be generous in this estimation – Hogan was a creative zero in this company, a complete disaster, a total anachronism who had almost no place in a late ‘90s pro wrestling company as an on-screen performer. At one point, he needed to be deployed like a main event version of Hacksaw Duggan, but that simply was never going to be an option with an egotist like him. Vince McMahon had the wherewithal to have Hogan do multiple jobs for his younger stars in 2002-2003; leadership in WCW either could not or would not do the same, and as a result, Hogan was a massive creative negative for roughly five-and-a-half years of his six-year WCW tenure. I’m thrilled that he’s gone. Fuck ‘im. After a Goldberg/Kevin Nash video package, Nash walks through the backstage area and asks Scott Steiner to watch his back. Scott’s too busy trying to drill Midajah and basically refuses, though. Nash lumbers to the ring for round three on PPV with Goldberg if my count is correct. Goldberg and Nash both get babyface pops. Goldberg pops the table onto the commentary desk; Nash walks over to verify its authenticity and tells Scott Hudson to keep an eye on it. The lockup sends both men into the corner, where Goldberg unleashes a series of rights; Nash fights back with knees and elbows. His boot choke gets countered with a leg sweep in a neat spot, however; Goldberg hits a suplex out of a front chancery for two. Goldberg lands his concussive standing side kick and, as Nash rolls around in pain on the mat, offers up a rude gesture to the crowd and yells FUCK YOU. Man, we are just getting super-edgy on PPV, huh? Goldberg was so distracted by his desire to cuss at the crowd that he walks into a chokeslam for two. Scott Steiner and Midajah make it out here to second Nash at ringside, but Russo is definitely back in charge because IT’S A SWERVE, BRO: After Nash shoot falls over trying to land a side slam on Goldberg and dodges a Goldberg spear, he sets up for a Jackknife that is cut off by Steiner’s interference. Nash big boots Steiner, but that leaves room for Goldberg to land a spear and Jackhammer for three. I don’t know why Steiner’s blatant interference didn’t draw a DQ. Was this match no DQ? Also, isn’t this a case of breaking the Cat’s “no interference” rule? Steiner locks Nash in the recliner while Goldberg rips Hall’s contract up; Hall is kayfabe fired by WCW three or four months before he’s shoot fired by WCW. Booker T. pledges to finally secure the world title tonight in a brief pre-match interview with Gene Okerlund. Michael Buffer re-enters the ring to introduce the competitors for the WCW World Heavyweight Championship between Jeff Jarrett and Booker T. I can’t hear if Buffer makes any mistakes because they rush through the entrances so quickly that Booker is still being introduced as Jarrett’s music plays. I guess Russo’s impromptu SHOOT, BRO pushed us over the allotted PPV time. Goldberg/Nash was also very short, though I assume this was probably booked short anyway considering the competitors. Booker and Jarrett feel things out a bit at first before locking up; Jarrett takes Booker over with a headlock before Booker powers out of it. Jarrett next tries a go-behind, but is reversed into a headlock. Jarrett reverses the headlock and gets shot in, wins a shoulderblock, and runs into a dropkick, which convinces him to bail and reassess his strategy. Jarrett’s strategy is to throw rights, which initially works, but which doesn’t stop Booker from landing a Houston Side Kick and initiating an obligabrawl into the crowd. Again, Steiner/Awesome already had a peak obligabrawl; this isn’t going to compare at all. I’m surprised at how low-energy this match feels so far, actually. Their match on the go-home Thunder was fun as hell, and I expected a continuation of that tonight. By the time the action gets back in the ring and Jarrett locks on a sleeper, I am somewhat bummed about this bout. Let’s hope the finishing run is good, at least. Booker fights up, but runs into a boot and gets locked in a sleeper again that, thankfully, Booker reverses quickly before being reversed in turn and hit with a kneebreaker. Jarrett tries to lock on a Figure Four, but Booker small packages him for two before Jarrett kicks out, stomps Booker’s head, and successfully locks it on. Booker fights to turn it over and does; Jarrett grabs the ropes to break it, then goes back to attacking Booker’s knee. He tries to drop his weight onto Booker’s knee, but Booker moves and makes a comeback. He lands an axe kick, Spinaroonies up, and hits a Book End for 2.9. Jarrett’s timing on kickouts is so good. Booker, who apparently didn’t feel any of that leg damage, hangs himself on the ropes after attempting another Houston Side Kick. Jarrett lands punches and then tosses Booker into ref Billy Silverman. Jarrett grabs the big gold belt and swings it at Booker, but Booker ducks, gets the belt, and rings Jarrett up for 2.85. Booker tries to follow up, but Jarrett low blows him and then wedges a chair in the corner. That didn’t work for Kanyon, and it doesn’t work for Jarrett, whom Booker tosses into the chair for another two count. Booker shoots Jarrett in, but Jarrett lands a punch when Booker ducks down before hitting Silverman with the Stroke and forearming Booker in the balls. Jarrett grabs his guitar and tries a diving KABONG, but he jumps right into a Book End that Slick Johnson enters the ring to count the three for. The fans are excited to see a title change, though these two have a much better match in them than this one. I know because I just saw one on the previous show. WCW World Heavyweight Championship title change count: 19 (Hitman > VACANT > Benoit > VACANT > Sid > Nash > Sid > VACANT > Jarrett > DDP > Arquette > Jarrett > Ric Flair > Jarrett > Nash > Flair > Jarrett > Hulk Hogan > Jarrett > Booker T.) Still, Booker T. is the world champion, and you know what? That means WCW is going to get better soon. I, for one, can dig that, sucka. 2 1
SirSmUgly Posted December 10, 2024 Author Posted December 10, 2024 (edited) Show #248 – 10 July 2000 "The one with a sense of freshness that reinvigorates WCW television for the first time in over a year" Hype video: Booker T. bypassed winning the United States Championship at the beginning of 1999 and went straight to winning the big gold. Well, not straight there. There was the loss of his T. and the whole thing where he became G.I. Bro. Why the hell did they book this guy so aimlessly for a year-and-a-half? Nitro is held in the future home base of AEW tonight. Madden puts over THE NEW WCW. I think I generally like the new WCW. I wish it stayed around longer than it did. Jacksonville greets Booker T. with a nice pop and a lot of roof raising. Don’t get me wrong; I’m enjoying this. However, Vince Russo hasn’t been champion yet, so I know that it's not all smooth sailing from here. Book cuts a typical babyface promo except for the part where he says that it isn’t a promo, but it’s for realsies and truesies from his heart. I’ll allow it because he shouts out his deceased mother, and that was nice. Booker’s then-wife is in the crowd, which would also be nice except this dude is making the moves on Paisley about now, probably. Booker is going to try and get over “Don’t hate the player; hate the game,” which is eh. Then he calls Goldberg a MARK. Oh, man. But you know what, I’m into Booker/Goldberg! That match sounds awesome! They teased babyface Booker versus babyface Goldberg about four or five months before this company was sold, and I remember the crowd wanting it as much as I did. Booker calls his then-wife into the ring and praises her before the Harlem Heat music hits and hey, look, it’s Stevie Ray! Stevie has ditched his cronies in the last and worst rendition of Harlem Heat; he enters the ring alone and reminisces on his past with his younger, more successful brother. In an interview that actually is quite touching if you’ve followed their storyline relationship, Stevie finally accepts that Booker is just better than he is man, it’s okay, he’s fine with it now, and look, he’s happy to support him in his time of triumph. This loving moment between siblings is interrupted by sirens. Midajah has a mic; she enters the ring and calls this company THE WCW. Had she been hanging around Bret Hart backstage before he went back to Calgary? She goes on about how awesome Scott Steiner is, and Steiner uses the diversion to attack Stevie and Booker from behind with a baseball bat. Ah, the Booker T./Scott Steiner rivalry is one of my favorites in all of pro wrestling. It started in the tag ranks and moved on to singles. Though it was off and on over the years, I do believe that it covered the tag, TV, U.S., and world championships in WCW. After a break, Book tells Stevie to keep his wife safe while he goes to settle the score with Steiner. Jeff Jarrett paces around while Pam Paulshock attempts to interview him. He demands a rematch, but Paulshock lets him know that the Cat has already given Booker an opponent for tonight. Jarrett starts to complain, but Scott Steiner attacks him from behind and knocks down the set. Next up is Shane Douglas (w/Torrie Wilson); Douglas says that actually, Torrie ended up being really into him back when he kidnapped her in late 1999, though they only got together lately. Then, he really heels it up bigtime by giving the mic to Torrie Wilson, who cuts a bad promo about Billy Kidman’s unimpressive dickdowns. Douglas is facing Crowbar (w/Daffney), the latter of whom I’m hoping is healing after losing the dead weight that is Dopey David Flair. This match is acceptable; Crowbar takes it outside and gets a chair. Torrie keeps him from landing a chair shot and later trips Crowbar on a rope run. It doesn’t help all that much because Crowbar continues to kick Douglas’s ass at ringside. Torrie tries to pull Crowbar away, so Daffney pulls Torrie away. Back in the ring, Crowbar scores a couple of two counts, but gets countered into a side Russian and has to kick out at two himself. They fight over a backslide, but Douglas swings around and turns it into that ugly inverted cutter he’s doing as a finisher now instead of the Pittsburgh Plunge. He gets three, but he has little time to celebrate because Buff Bagwell busts up the proceedings and beats Douglas down. Pam Paulshock asks Billy Kidman about Torrie Wilson, and Kidman pulls out the “Guy Who Lost His Girlfriend, Is Still Bitter About It” dictionary and fires off the following vocabulary: skank, money-hungry gold digger, sloppy seconds. Suddenly, Jeff Jarrett disrespectfully shoves him away to take over the interview segment for himself. Kidman jumps Jarrett in the middle of Jarrett whining out a demand for a title shot. In the parking lot, M.I. Smooth opens the limo door and lets out Tank Abbott and Three Count, then hands Abbott a certified gold record. Everyone is in full tuxes, except for Tank, who wears a tux top with his regular grungy basketball shorts. That’s a funny little visual. The Cat tries to hold a phone conversation, but Jeff Jarrett busts into his office and demands a title shot. He does not get a title shot. He gets a match against Billy Kidman. Three Count and Tank Abbott (w/gold record) get in the ring, where a ladder is unfolded. Ah, we’re getting that Three Count/Jung Dragons ladder match, and I do now remember that the item hanging above the ring to be retrieved was that gold record. Tank plays hype man for Three Count and their recent musical and commercial success. Karagias hangs the record, but the Jung Dragons flood the ring and attack Tank and Three Count. Kaz shoves Karagias off the ladder and to the floor, then picks up the ladder and uses it to knock out the other Three Count members. Tank waits for them to put down the ladder before he gets back in the ring and starts throwing right hands, but then THE GREAT FUCKING MUTA slides into the ring and mists Abbott; Kaz climbs the ladder and steals the gold record. What the fuck?! We get Muta this late in WCW’s existence?! It’s my favorite type of Muta: Bonus Muta! Kanyon is peeved in his interview with Pam Paulshock; he thinks that he should be the number one contender to the world title since he pinned Booker an hour or so before Booker became the champ at BatB. He’s planning to pitch the Cat on getting a title shot. Match number two of the night pits Jeff Jarrett against Billy Kidman. Kidman is another of those guys who would have had a much different career if WCW existed into the aughts. I get why he also wanted to leave for the WWF along with the Radicalz, but he’s one of those guys who would only be over long-term in WCW as were Saturn and Malenko. Kidman and Jarrett proceed to have a good match, wouldn’t you believe it? Jarrett wins a speedy opening exchange by hip tossing Kidman from the ring to the floor; he follows up by controlling an obligabrawl. Back in the ring, Jarrett gets lax with a lariat attempt and eats a dropkick. He tries to regain control, but Kidman slips him a couple of times and hits a crossbody that Jarrett rolls through for two of his own. Kidman’s up first, though, and hits a Sky High for two before sending Jarrett to the floor with a lariat of his own. Unfortunately for his sense of momentum, Torrie Wilson makes his way down and gets in his face; she tries to slap Kidman, who stops her and avoids Shane Douglas’s sneak attack besides. However, as he dispatches of Douglas, Torrie boots him in the balls. Douglas quickly drills Kidman with a DDT and rolls him back into the ring, where Jarrett covers for about 2.8. Jarrett attempts a vertical suplex; Kidman rolls through it and sunset flips Jarrett for two. Jarrett next tries a powerbomb – oops! – and kicks out of the counter-facebuster for two. Kidman next tries his rebound bulldog, but Jarrett halts Kidman’s momentum after Kidman kicks off the turnbuckle and wraps him in a Stroke that ends the match. This match was some good work with nice pacing. Scott Steiner beats the crap out of Kanyon for even suggesting that he should get a world title shot. Mike Awesome is macking on a woman of a healthy weight when the Cat tries to award the United States Championship to him. Awesome says thanks, but no thanks because he’d rather win his titles in the ring before going back to hitting on his romantic target. Well, VACANT is the champ, I suppose. Here’s Mike Awesome after the break; his opponent is Booker T., defending the WCW World Heavyweight Championship for the first time, if I understand Tony S. and Mark Madden correctly. Awesome shoves Booker away from a lockup and scores a few punches, but he decides to run with Book. That’s a bad move for him, as Booker pops up from a shoulderblock and scores a roundhouse kick that sends Awesome to the floor. Awesome paces around ringside for a bit and considers his options before getting back in the ring and elbowing his way out of a hammerlock. Alas, he ends up running with Booker again and takes a Houston Side Kick to the mush. Book follows up with ten punches in the corner, and though his whip to the other corner is reversed, he dodges a charging Awesome. Unfortunately for him, Awesome dodges his second Houston Side Kick and scores a lariat. Awesome dumps Book to the floor and cracks a chair across Booker’s back; then, he jabs a folded chair into Booker’s ribs. Awesome’s chair-assisted attack allows him to definitively win this obligabrawl, and when he rolls Booker back into the ring, he’s able to follow with a slingshot splash that gets two. After wandering around and taunting the crowd, Awesome lands a spinebuster and goes up for a top-rope splash, which connects for an immaculately timed 2.9. Awesome decides that using weapons worked really well for him earlier, so he rolls outside and sets up a table. Back in the ring, he lands another lariat and readies a running Awesome Bomb that is meant to deposit Book through the table, but that Booker slips out of. Book lands a running forearm that sends Awesome off the apron and through the table. Awesome struggles back into the ring, but he’s basically cooked: Booker hits an axe kick, a Spinaroonie, and a Houston Side Kick in short order. Awesome manages to get a boot up on a corner charge, but he runs right into a spinebuster and is an easy target for a missile dropkick that draws an equally immaculately timed 2.9. He doesn’t kick out of Booker’s follow-up Book End, though. Oh wow, WCW has gone back to putting on good TV matches. I love it! What a forward-thinking strategy for making me enjoy their wrestling show! After the match, Scott Steiner rushes into the ring and attacks Booker, but Mike Awesome completes his face turn by helping Booker out and clubbing Steiner away from locking on a Steiner Recliner. Steiner bails as Awesome and Booker share a bit of respect for one another. The Cat hastily leaves his office mumbling about Scott Steiner having interfered in his last match. The Cat’s babyface turn has been gradual, and what I like about it is that it feels natural. He came into this job as a heel, but the impulsive actions and insistent demands and of the other wrestlers have made his job harder, and now he’s seen the need for strong rules and regulations. After a break, the Cat is in the ring, where he calls out Scott Steiner’s entirely-too-disrespectful ass. Steiner and Midajah answer the call. Steiner immediately threatens to jam his mic up the Cat’s ass, so the Cat calls Steiner a “stupid bitch” and attacks him, which is some wild shit, right? I didn’t expect the Cat to escalate things verbally that much or that quickly. Of course, Steiner wins that little brawl, but Booker runs in and beats the hell out of Steiner. Kanyon slides into the ring and attacks Booker, and finally Jarrett comes to the ring and attacks everyone. Steiner eventually bails as Booker employs a series of kicks to knock Kanyon and Jarrett out of the ring. The Cat re-enters the ring and declares that Kanyon, Steiner, and Jarrett will face one another in a Triple Threat Match tonight for a world title shot at New Blood Rising. That seems like a reasonable plan! Alright, great, that works out nicely. There’s not a wrench left to be thrown into this plan. Not a one. Hey, is that Goldberg’s music? Actually, Goldberg doesn’t overcomplicate things. He simply wants the match to be made a Four Corners Match that includes him, and the Cat acquiesces to his demands. Heel Goldberg responds to the Cat agreeing to add him to the match like so: “Thank you!” Goldberg isn’t very good at being a heel sometimes. Norman Smiley has Ralphus running stairs to get him in shape. I’m bummed by this pairing. Tony S.: “We are being told that this [happened] earlier today.” That reminds Woody in production to hit the little EARLIER TODAY button on his panel. Fuckin' Woody. Norman Smiley and Ralphus are getting a rematch for the WCW Hardcore Championship. This wasn’t particularly fun when Smiley and Ralphus were doing this sort of nonsense against Terry Funk. If you remember the relatively new hardcore title match rules, this bout is supposed to start in the back, but Vito comes out here to the ring, where Smiley has cut a tiny pre-match promo on him, so that he can fight Smiley to the backstage area and then fight him back out to the ring. That is, in a word, stupid. Ralphus hides under a table in the ring while Vito and Smiley fight their way back. Vito tosses Smiley aside and then grabs a crutch and waffles Ralphus with it a few times before using a bat to swat a traffic cone into Ralphus’s taint. Please get Ralphus off my fucking television, WCW Creative. It’s not late 1998 anymore. No one wants to see Ralphus taking bumps in hardcore matches or on television without Chris Jericho in general. The finish also stinks because Vito splashes Ralphus through a table, but pulls off the pinfall to stand up and talk shit so that Norm can hit him in the back with a chair and wiggle while Vito topples back onto Ralphus and gets three. Oh, WCW. The Jung Dragons attack the Cat backstage; they proceed to have a fight that essentially comes off as a fight scene from a movie where the director wants to emulate Stephen Chow, but has neither the budget nor the skill to pull off a Shaolin Soccer-style film with pro wrestling in place of soccer. Which is to say that the segment is fine for what it is, actually. Paisley is looking for someone to iron The Artist’s shirt. She comes upon a guy in a sparkly pink suit who calls himself Kiwi, but I’m writing his name as Kwee Wee, since that’s what he ends up being called. I probably don’t have to tell you that Paisley is enamored with this dude’s style. Lenny Lane has been in the front row all night holding up a USE ME sign. No. Please don’t use him. He’s not long for this company anyway, and I’m pretty certain that nothing will come of this angle. Speaking of things that I didn’t remember from this era of WCW, I did not remember Lance Storm coming into the company as a babyface. Jacksonville fires up a U-S-A chant. Uh, did Storm turn heel at some point between now and the previous Thunder? Storm has a mic, and he tells the crowd that sports entertainment is not his forte, but he can wrestle like nobody’s business. Then, he demands that “O Canada” is played. Ah, it’s been too long since the Amazing French Canadiens blessed us with this type of request. I’ll just say here that as a big fan of Canada (or at least the westernmost part of it), I will absolutely be treating Team Canada as the babyfaces, sometimes via tortured logic. You have been warned. Lance Storm’s opponent is The Artist (w/Paisley). Remember the Artist getting over-pushed at the start of the year? When zendragon noted that the shows now feel reloaded with talent, this is a perfect example of his point. Instead of being the cruiserweight champ, The Artist is being fed to Lance Storm and is about twelfth or fifteenth in line when it comes to young talent being centered on these main WCW shows. Storm and the Artist have a solid match while Paisley enjoys a nice little heel spell on commentary. She mocks Storm’s seriousness and fantasizes about Kwee Wee; in the ring, The Artist tries a second-rope hammerfist, but gets caught and bridged over in a Northern Lights for two. Storm reels off a series of moves, including a superkick, a sit-out powerbomb, and a springboard dropkick, but all of these merely score two counts. The Artist comes back and lands a Samoan Drop for two, but when he tries to shoot Storm into the corner, Storm turns his momentum into a roll-through Canadian Half-Crab for the submission. I’m digging all these solid television bouts. Vampiro and his coffin make it to the show. Eh, we got over an hour into things before I was forced to watch Vampiro, so I’m okay with it. Rey Misterio Jr. and Juventud Guerrera (w/Tygress) are receiving a tag title match against KroniK for some reason because, as I recall, Captain Rection and Corporal Cajun were the guys who won the title shot the previous week. No, wait, Rection and Cajun (w/the M.I.A.) are here, too. The desk was as confused as I was because they also questioned why Rey and Juvi were getting a title shot when Rection and Cajun earned the shot last week. OK, so Rey, Juvi, and Tygress are joining the desk to watch Rection and Cajun face off with KroniK for the WCW World Tag Team Championship. Juvi, Madden, and Tony S. yap at each other while Rection locks up with Adams and gets full nelson slammed. Rey does not appreciate the power wrestling in the ring, preferring speed and guile as he does. I like them all, frankly. Rection and Cajun get some control and use quick tags to try and keep Adams down, but Adams and Rection clothesline one another, which sparks a whole lot of movement outside the ring. Rey and Juvi try to intervene, but are cut off by Jindrak and O’Haire; all four men fight into the crowd. In the ring, Rection and Cajun score a series of double-team moves, and Rection goes up top, where he badly whiffs on a Savage Elbow. Clarke accepts the hot tag and lands suplexes, shoulderblocks, and strikes on both men before running himself into a Rection wheel kick. Rection goes up for the No Laughing Matter and scores it, but Adams makes the save. I almost bit on that finish. The issue for the contenders is that Cajun is badly undersized in this bout, so he loses control on a Bourbon Street Blues attempt and gets splattered with a High Times that Rection barely makes the save on. KroniK easily dispatches of Rection and then botch their diving clothesline/powerbomb move when Adams falls down as he tries to powerbomb Cajun. Yeah, maybe re-think using that move as a regular spot, fellas. After KroniK gets three, The Perfect Event attempts a Lex Flexer attack, but isn’t particularly successful. Botched finish aside, I thought this was a decent little televised tag match. Tony S. credits Bam Bam Bigelow’s heroism for saving some children from a fire. I thought that Bammer did that after WCW closed. Huh. My timeline of WCW-related stuff from 1999 through 2001 is, in plain English, totally fucked. Vampiro is here to do some more mediocre mic work. He rants about Sting and the KISS Demon; the Demon enters the ring and faces off with Vamp. Asya tries to pull the Demon away as Vampiro exhorts the Demon to beat the shit out of her. The Demon goozles Asya, but the lights flicker and the Undertaker appears. No, wait, a masked Sting appears, or maybe Jeff Farmer. Whoever it is, he destroys Vamp and the Demon. I liked how short this segment was. Wow, Nitro main event time already? I remember this feeling. It’s how one feels when a show is entertaining and well-paced enough that time just slips on by. Jeff Jarrett, Scott Steiner, Kanyon, and Goldberg meet in the ring, with the winner earning a title shot at New Blood Rising, as you may recall. This match starts with two men in the ring instead of all four men in the ring, which sucks. The crowd chants for GOLDBERG, by the way. This main event is pretty much a Nitro Special in that the action only really begins about five minutes out from the end of this video. Steiner and Kanyon work for a couple of minutes, and the crowd pops huge for Goldberg booting Steiner out of a Steiner Recliner attempt on Kanyon. Hey, isn’t that move still illegal? Kanyon tries to pin Steiner, but Goldberg keeps stepping between the ropes and booting guys off the pinfall. Kanyon shows THA THA THA ROC to Jarrett, who reaches out and forcibly tags his hands. Whoopsie! This match is far worse for the tag structure, though. I genuinely enjoyed the Four Corners bouts back in April of ’99 with all four contestants brawling in and around the ring. Goldberg eventually tags himself in and Jackhammers Kanyon, but Steiner makes the save. Steiner and Goldberg go nose to nose and brawl with one another while Jarrett sneaks up behind them and covers a still KO’d Kanyon for three. Scott Steiner helped Goldberg beat Kevin Nash on the previous night’s show. I would have liked an explanation for that to help me understand why Steiner did this or why Goldberg weren’t particularly friendly with one another tonight, even before they faced off for a world title shot! Still, WCW is finally elevating a fresh crop of guys into the main event, and it’s paying off. Well, not in terms of their business, which failed, but in terms of my interest on this re-watch. And really, isn’t that the most important thing here? No, no, it isn’t. But it’s quite lovely for me as a viewer! 3 out of 5 Stinger Splashes. Edited December 11, 2024 by SirSmUgly 5
SirSmUgly Posted December 11, 2024 Author Posted December 11, 2024 Thunder Interlude – show number one hundred and eighteen – 12 July 2000 "The WCW Gang adds Stevie Ray on color and has me legit enjoying their commentary for the first time since Dusty Rhodes was part of three-man booths on WCW PPVs" With no more Hog/Road Wild PPVs in August, let’s Thunderrrrrrrrrrrr toward the sole New Blood Rising show… Recap: There’s a “we tried our best, but WCW production might have caused some of this show to be lost” warning before we review the scrambled WCW World Heavyweight Championship scene…Also, Muta was there…And Lance Storm was suddenly a heel… Kanyon laments his loss of a world title shot on Nitro, but M.I. Smooth whispers an idea into his ear that gives him a bit of hope… After the title card, we join Tony S. and Bobby Heenan at the desk…Mike Tenay is not here because he was kayfabe annihilated by Scott Steiner while conducting a pre-taped interview with him…We’ll see how Tenay set Scotty off later on this show… Three Count and Tank Abbott open the show…I’ll tell you who is wrestling after he gets done complaining about the Jung Dragons backjumping his favorite band on Nitro…Tank threatens the Dragons and Muta and tells them that he’ll be watching the stage with his back to the ring to make sure they don’t interfere…Well, there are a couple of problems with that…For one, the Jung Dragons attacked from the crowd, not down the aisle…Second, he’s now told them that this strategy will work again…I think Tank’s a kayfabe moron, which means that Stasiak and Palumbo are kayfabe super-morons for not being able to outsmart him… Tank dances on his square while the Dragons once again attack from the crowd…Tank finally turns around and is clobbered by an onrushing Muta…I think this is an eight-man tag like something out of a fever dream…Get this: The Great Muta and the Jung Dragons vs. Tank Abbott and Three Count…Only WCW would book a match like this…God, I miss this company so much…This is a fun little opener…There are a number of double- and triple-team moves…Muta comes in and hits Dragon Screws on all the Three Count members, but Tank blocks a misting with a dance circle, hammers Muta in the back as Muta walks away, then lands a right on a leaping Yang…Helms covers for three…Tank dances back down the aisle as Three Count recover in the ring…This wasn’t good, but it was weird…Why did Muta just turn around and wander away from Tank after Tank blocked the mist?...You know what, let’s not think too hard about this…It happened, and for that, I am grateful… Kanyon asks the Cat for a match against Jeff Jarrett…The Cat says that he’s booked Jarrett against Buff Bagwell, but Buff is always late to the show anyway – I see we’re SHOOTIN’- and then agrees to replace Buff with Kanyon if Kanyon will donate to him a signed copy of his book. General Rection huddles with the M.I.A. and lays out his squad’s matches tonight: Private Stash versus the Demon and…Oops, The Perfect Event walks in and takes out everyone but Gunns and Stash (the latter of whom has already left to prep for his match) with Lex Flexers…Gunns takes a flex bar, hits Palumbo in the nads with it, and then kicks a laughing Stasiak in the berries as well… It’s STEVIE RAY sliding into Tenay’s spot on color!...Have I mentioned how much I like WCW again?...A tiny STEVIE RAY chant starts up behind him…Stevie puts over Booker’s accomplishments at the desk…He blows off his most recent heel turn on Booker by saying that Booker’s title win made him realize that he was being a dick, man, and he really should be nicer and more supportive toward his brother… Vampiro has the KISS Demon in thrall…Vampiro’s shirt says something in French on the back…I think it’s Conformity is the death of the [???]…I can’t see that last word…Wait, it’s Ame…I’m going to guess that it means soul…Yep, Google tells me it means soul…Conformity is the death of the soul is the edgelord sort of thing that someone conforming to broad cultural ideas about how to be radically different would say…We’re back to super-short matches so far on Thunder…This one goes ninety seconds and ends when Stash leaps into a uranage (that Tony S. calls a Cobra Clutch Slam) for three…After the match, we cut to the catwalk, where a guy in a mask who we’ll just go ahead and stipulate is Sting points a bat at Vamp and the Demon… Lance Storm is from CALGARY…ALBERTA, CANADA, and therefore he does not tell jokes, as he explains to Billy Kidman backstage…They walk toward the ring, and Positively Kanyon hits a Kanyon Kutter on a random PA in the background…BANGGGGGGG…I don’t think he hit a random Kanyon Kutter on the previous Nitro, so I relaxed a bit and didn’t expect one there… Ms. Hancock has David Flair dressed in a suit that matches her suit’s colors…Dopey Dave doesn’t like it and wants to go back to wearing his Nitro Grill t-shirt and ratty jeans…But of course, he’ll sublimate his desires just to keep Hancock around… Billy Kidman is annoyed when his tag partner Lance Storm demands that “O Canada” is played…Stevie Ray: “Now this sucka gotta be crazy”…Kidman takes out a paper and reads it, gives Storm bunny ears, and dances around in the back like a disrespectful prick…Storm should beat this dude’s ass when the anthem ends...However, he just rushes opponents Jindrak and O’Haire…The rookies make a comeback, send Kidman to the floor, and land a dropkick on Storm… Stevie Ray is already the best color commentator in the company merely by doing the basic work that a color commentator should…He notes that Paul Orndorff must have given these stand-out students special attention because they don’t wrestle like rookies…Then, he gives them his stamp of approval from the perspective of a multi-titled tag team specialist…Wow, one guy got Orndorff, the Power Plant, O’Haire, Jindrak, and himself over in a couple of sentences…Are color commentators allowed to do that sort of thing?...Stevie analyzes this very short match like a legit color guy…He’s impressed when Jindrak and O’Haire overcome their inexperience to whip Kidman into Storm…O’Haire follows up with a Seanton Bomb for three…Storm superkicks Kidman’s stupid ass after the match, then tells the camera HE’S NOT FROM CALGARY…ALBERTA, CANADA…That’s as good a reason as any to superkick a guy, I guess… In a backstage area, Vampiro mumbles some nonsense to the Demon before threatening to rip Sting’s mask off his face on the upcoming Nitro… In his interview with Gene Okerlund, Vito declares himself the fightinest of fightin’ hardcore champs…We cut to Hancock and Dopey Dave elsewhere in the backstage area as Vito talks about all the dudes he beat…Hancock wants Dave to get her some gold, so Dave busts in on Vito’s interview and attacks the champ in the midst of the interview…Smashy smashy smashy…Trashy trashy trashy… Dave’s surprise attack gives him a considerable advantage, as he dominates all the way into the aisle before Vito is able to get his druthers and mount a comeback…Dave takes shortcuts and wrestles like his life (or maybe three minutes of disappointing sex for Ms. Hancock) depends on it…Speaking of Hancock, she angrily marches to ringside as the match is now eligible to reach a decision…Vito lands a Savage Elbow, but instead of covering, he celebrates and then smooches Hancock…Hancock bites Vito’s lip to get away…Vito hits his cone-assisted taint ripper spot on Dopey Dave…The hardcore champ sets up a table in the center of the ring…Wait, no, it’s broke…Vito still manages a Paisan Plunge through it and retains his title… The Cat chatters to someone James Brown (supposedly) on the phone, but Jeff Jarrett cuts in and says that he’s not working this show…A pissed off Cat tells him that no, actually, Buff’s not here, but Kanyon is now his opponent…Further, if Jarrett loses this match, he loses his title shot at New Blood Rising…Jarrett is aggy about this change in plans, but what did he expect?...He keeps antagonizing an equally vindictive guy who has matchmaking power… Earlier today, after The Perfect Event finishes practicing their new pose down routine in the ring, Kanyon’s stupid ass runs into the ring, Kanyon Kuts a tech, and then runs all the way up to the hard cam and yells BANGGGGG because this guy is fucking dumb in the best of ways… Speaking of The Perfect Event, they do their pose down business…Stevie is the embodiment of the JudgeJudypointingatherwatch,gif about it…Is this match happening in the vacuum of space, or is that just total silence for two guys who suck?...General Rection and Corporal Cajun (w/Major Gunns) are their opponents…There’s a lot of pace in this match…One thing I have to give TPE is that they can go at pace when need be…Stevie Ray goes off on Stasiak for posing instead of pinning someone, especially because he should know better as a second-generation wrestler…Stasiak and Cajun fall over, which sparks a Rection hot tag…I think Cajun raked Stasiak’s eyes while in press slam position, but the camera missed the counter… Stasiak and Palumbo get rid of Cajun and get to work on Rection…Rection counters with a double DDT, can’t get a tag, and endures a bit more punishment before landing a powerslam and getting a hot tag to Cajujn…Cajun enters the ring with a missile dropkick on Palumbo and gets two on a follow-up Bourbon Street Blues…Cajun manages a Whiplash 2000, but Stasiak makes the save on the pinfall attempt… Cajun is able to dispose of Stasiak with a headscissors, then drops Palumbo with a vertical suplex so that Rection can land a Savage Elbow for two….Rection goes back up and lands a No Laughing Matter, but Stasiak cracks the ref with the flex bar…Cajun comes in and takes it from him, but the ref turns around and accuses Cajun of having hit him and awards the match to TPE…Weak finish, but solid match… Booker T. steps out of an elevator before the break, and he joins us in the ring after it…Booker cuts a babyface promo on Jeff Jarrett…Mike Awesome views the promo on a monitor in the back…Book is not a fan of Jarrett’s shitty attitude and promises to do whatever he must to retain the big gold…He also declares himself a fighting champion who will actually defend the title unlike some orange fuckboi balding veterans who need not be named…Finally, he threatens Scott Steiner’s life for intimidating his wife on Monday…SAVE THE DRAMA FOR YA MAMA and DON’T HATE THE PLAYER, HATE THE GAME both seem moderately over with this crowd, somehow…A small contingent actually finished the second of those catchphrases themselves…Huh… Rick Steiner interrupts Booker’s interview…He pretends to think that Scotty Steiner’s actions on Monday were over the line…Now, if Booker thinks back a little over a year ago, he’ll remember that Rick Steiner pretended to be upset about Booker being in cahoots with Stevie Ray to keep the TV title before turning out to be in cahoots with his brother Scott so that he could win the TV title…Booker in fact does remember this and is reluctant to shake the guy’s hand….Rick’s NO SHIT, BOOK convinces him to reluctantly shake his hand…Rick Steiner makes to leave the ring before jumping Booker…Stevie Ray can’t take this and jumps in the ring, but Dellinger and his mooks swarm Stevie and just let Rick Steiner take Book’s belt and attack Booker with a chair…Mike Awesome shoots down the ramp and makes the save…After Awesome returns the belt to Booker, Booker and Awesome shake hands… Daffney, in a Stuck Mojo shirt (which doubles as a nice callback), asks Crowbar if she looks fat while wearing it…Crowbar assures her that she looks great, then silently berates himself for not explaining that she looks great in anything or nothing because she’s the most beautiful girl in the world…I mean, that’s the face he made…We cut to Shane Douglas and Torrie Wilson, their opponents, prepping for the match, but I didn’t catch what they said because I was too busy rooting for Crowbar to figure out the right time to shoot his shot considering that Daffney just broke an engagement… The Cat cuts Billy Kidman off and warns him against interfering in the mixed tag match…The Cat insulting Billy Kidman’s relationship abilities is hilarious…“You couldn’t handle a girl like that anyway; I thought about taking her myself”…The Cat says that if Kidman doesn’t interfere in the bout, he can have a match against Lance Storm…Wait, he says it like this: “If you stay out of this match, you get Lance Storm; if you interfere, you get my foot”…Commissioner Cat is delightful… Shane Douglas and Torrie Wilson face Crowbar and Daffney…The Franchise and Torrie do some annoying mic work before the match…Crowbar and Daffney rush the ring while Tony S. tells Stevie Ray, who has returned to his spot at the desk, that he was supposed to be cool about Rick Steiner jumping Booker…Stevie: “Tony, where I come from, that was cool”…In the ring, Daffney slaps Torrie…Torrie mouths YOU BITCH, then takes her shoes off, which means that there’s fixing to be a CATFIGHT… Torrie tags Douglas back in after the catfight…Douglas tries to get at Daffney, but she narrowly makes the tag herself…Douglas drops Crowbar and tags Torrie back in…She lands a splash on Crowbar for two, but is cut off from tagging back out…Crowbar tags Daffney back in, but Douglas blindly tags Torrie…Douglas prepares to hit some offense on Daffney, but she pops him in the penis and hits him with a jawbreaker… Crowbar tags back in and dominates…He runs into a back elbow on a corner charge, but is able to land a Mindbender for two…Crowbar and Douglas fuck up a Crowbar flip out of a powerbomb, which is hilarious as Douglas just drops Crowbar flat on his back, then stares down at the guy clearly trying to figure out who fucked this one up…They do the spot again, correctly this time, before Douglas lands a Franchiser for three…He also lands one on an attacking Daffney post-match… Booker T. finds the Cat in the hallway and demands a match against Rick Steiner tonight…The Cat says that he can’t do it because he already gave the match against Rick Steiner to Mike Awesome, who passes by and thanks the Cat for acceding to his request… We get an exterior shot of the arena before Tony S. kicks us to the Scott Steiner/Mike Tenay interview…In the distance of this shot, Kanyon lands a Kanyon Kutter on a random passerby and yells BANGGGGG…Heh heh heh… The interview goes off the rails from the jump...Tenay tries to get info about why Scott Steiner backstabbed Kevin Nash, but Steiner doesn’t give a shit about Nash or Hall for that matter…He exclaims that he fucked Nash over simply because he felt like it…Steiner wants to move past the discussion about Nash, but Tenay is insistent…Steiner is unhinged about Booker T. getting a world title shot when Steiner’s been wrestling for even longer than Book has, then suddenly and randomly starts ranting again about Tenay calling it a HURRACANRANA and not a FRANKENSTEINER…According to Wikipedia, a rana lands the taker on their back, but the Frankensteiner lands them on their head…Or it lands Scotty on his head, like at WrestleMania IX… Tenay tries to reason with this nutbar ‘roidhead, but he gets nowhere…Tenay wants to talk about Goldberg, but Steiner feels that Michigan men are better than Georgia men, and that's all that really needs to be said…Tenay asks Steiner about the fans being on his side, and Steiner really just wants the fans to fuck off…At the point at which Tenay tries to do some amateur psychoanalysis of Steiner, Steiner gets mad and Tenay gets PJ Carlessimo’d…I mean, have you been online and seen people diagnosing other people they’ve never met, or worse, diagnosing their exes?...I don’t condone Scotty choking Tenay for doing that, but I understand… The Cat keeps trying to make a deal to get James Brown back on WCW television, but this time, his phone call is interrupted by the Jung Dragons…They do an absurd comedy martial arts fight scene that the Cat easily wins… Lance Storm is walking back down the ramp, where he is immediately jumped by Billy Kidman…I have to give Stevie some criticism for contradicting Heenan’s claim that everybody is talking about Storm and his debut…I get it…You want to do the babyface thing where you contradict Heenan’s ridiculousness, but doing it there doesn’t help Storm’s mystique as a dangerous new talent…Anyway, Kidman and Storm trade moves at near-max pace…A chair gets wedged between the ropes, and it comes into play when Storm kicks out of a flash pin and sends Kidman head first into the chair…He tries to powerbomb Kidman on the chair, but gets obviously reversed out of it…Storm’s head comes nowhere near the chair, but he jobs to the facebuster anyway…Uh, I think Storm should have won that one… Buff Bagwell finally makes it to the arena…He was driven by his mom Judy!...Holy shit, Kanyon walks up and greets her…Judy, overjoyed: CHRISTOPHER!...Aw, Kanyon’s leading her off to hit her with a Kanyon Kutter…His aside glance to the camera is one of mischievous joy as he leads her away from the car… When we come back from break, Judy’s on the concrete in a neck brace as paramedics and Buff attend to her… Oh no, Rick Steiner insists on doing pre-match mic work before he wrestles Mike Awesome…A portion of the crowd also finishes the YOU DON’T LIKE ME, BITE ME catchphrase…You can get a 2000 wrestling crowd in the United States to sing along with anything…Awesome unloads on Ricky early, so he bails, then pushes the ref into Awesome as a diversion to take control…Steiner lands punches and almost drops Awesome on an Oklahoma Stampede…Ricky scores a series of two counts and gets rattled, barking at the ref instead of following up…This allows Awesome to make a comeback… Awesome goes up top, but he gets caught and super belly-to-belly’d…Steiner makes a delayed cover for two and yaps at the ref some more…Steinerline, complaining, delayed cover, two…Steiner chases the ref out of the ring and gets rolled up from behind for three…Wow, great job at making Mike Awesome look like a threat…Booker T. runs in and makes the save for Awesome…Buff Bagwell could learn something from Booker and Awesome getting each other back on those saves…Steiner bails and grabs a tripod to use as a weapon, but he backs into the commentary desk and is spooked by Stevie standing up…He instead dumps the tripod and takes off… Booker T. joins the desk for the main event match between Jeff Jarrett and Kanyon…Kanyon’s inability to resist Kanyon Kuttering Judy probably has doomed him in this one…Bret Hart still hasn’t been outright fired because he will be in Vancouver, BC when New Blood Rising tickets go on sale…This has got to be the only WCW show to ever be in Vancouver…Or maybe even Western Canada…I found out that Survivor Series was there this year because a couple of Saturday nights ago, the hotel I was staying at was flooded with dudes wearing replica titles and wrestling t-shirts… This is going about seven minutes, so again, it’s worked at a nice pace…Both men trade two counts and counter one another’s moves…Kanyon hits a top-rope Rocker Dropper after cutting off a Jarrett charge with a boot, but he spends time celebrating and doesn’t bother even pinning Jarrett…He wanders out to taunt Booker, and as Harlem Heat points out what a mistake this is on commentary, Jarrett recovers, rolls outside the ring, and instigates an obligabrawl that he easily wins because of Kanyon being distracted…Jarrett then makes the same mistake and is hit in the back with a chair by Kanyon while jawing at Booker…On commentary, Harlem Heat clowns both men for not keeping their focus… Back in the ring, Jarrett and Kanyon continue to counter one another’s moves…Kanyon hits a sit-out spinebuster after blocking a powerbomb, but it only gets two…Kanyon goes for the loaded book, but whiffs on the swing and gets DDT’d onto the book by Jarrett for 2.7…Jarrett goes for the EL KABONG, but the ref takes the guitar away and Kanyon grabs the loaded book and lands a shot for two after Jarrett puts his boot on the ropes… Kanyon knocks Jarrett back to the floor, but Jarrett disposes of Kanyon, then walks over a shoves Stevie and slaps Booker…Stevie punches Jarrett as security floods the desk…It’s a good thing they’re out here because they also are able to grab Buff Bagwell after Bagwell attacks Kanyon…Jarrett weasels away from security and lands a Stroke on a disoriented Kanyon for three…Security keeps Booker from getting in the ring to square off with Jarrett as the show ends…I liked this fuckery-filled finish…It felt appropriately chaotic… Decent wrestling tonight, but I genuinely enjoyed the commentary…I know Stevie will end up going all YAKS and FRUIT BOOTIES, but I love former wrestlers on color talking through the kayfabe logic of the match…It makes a show so much better, and it’s such a small thing for a promoter to add to their shows…WOOOO… 2
zendragon Posted December 11, 2024 Posted December 11, 2024 So are we done with Mark Madden? I had a though that maybe he was trying to be more like Joel Gertner than a rip off Lawler. AND FINALLY JUDY BAGWELL ON A POLE!!! 1
SirSmUgly Posted December 11, 2024 Author Posted December 11, 2024 (edited) 7 hours ago, zendragon said: So are we done with Mark Madden? I had a though that maybe he was trying to be more like Joel Gertner than a rip off Lawler. AND FINALLY JUDY BAGWELL ON A POLE!!! I think Madden is still on Nitro. Nitro is Schiavone/Hudson/Madden. Thunder was Schiavone/Heenan/Tenay. Maybe Stevie is replacing Tenay on Thunder? Madden hangs on in the company until December. EDIT: Just on the off-chance that anyone cares, I'll be unable to review and post until after Christmas. I should be back before the new year on around the 28th or 29th. This year's "can't watch late-stage WCW, but still want to write about it" project while I'm gone will be continuing to build out my listing of all the Nitros and Thunders watched with original date of airing, title that I gave each episode review, and number of Stinger Splashes or WOO/OWW rating, as well as a tier ranking for all the PPVs from this era. Edited December 11, 2024 by SirSmUgly 1
Spaceman Spiff Posted December 12, 2024 Posted December 12, 2024 Every now & then I pull up online video comps of Kanyon's Kutter rampage and smile, letting out a "BAAANG" each time along w/ him. I put up with you crap talking Stamboli, but now Palumbo also? You're just going to have to picture me shaking my fist in your direction. 1 1
SirSmUgly Posted December 13, 2024 Author Posted December 13, 2024 On 12/12/2024 at 2:45 AM, Spaceman Spiff said: Every now & then I pull up online video comps of Kanyon's Kutter rampage and smile, letting out a "BAAANG" each time along w/ him. I put up with you crap talking Stamboli, but now Palumbo also? You're just going to have to picture me shaking my fist in your direction. Aw, Palumbo ended up being serviceable by the time he tagged with Billy Gunn, at least. As for Stamboli, the guy did win me over by ripping his undercarriage in half and struggling through the rest of his match with Terry Funk, so there's that!
Spaceman Spiff Posted December 13, 2024 Posted December 13, 2024 Hardcore Palumboner over here. My man throws a fabulous looking punch. 1
zendragon Posted December 18, 2024 Posted December 18, 2024 I really hope these episodes don't get yanked before we get to the end
DangerMark Posted December 18, 2024 Posted December 18, 2024 It's the second most perfect ending to this whole futile exercise, behind @SirSmUgly getting sent away to a secure facility in the WWE sections of the board, but is able to post at perfect liberty everywhere else.
twiztor Posted December 18, 2024 Posted December 18, 2024 9 hours ago, zendragon said: I really hope these episodes don't get yanked before we get to the end in that worst case scenario, i feel confident the fates will make sure Smelly gets to the end of WCW. 2
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