Fuzzy Dunlop

Yeah, The Mummy is one of the worst films of the year. Obviously there were a lot of stories of Tom Cruise gonna Tom Cruise but watching it, you can legit smell his grubby fingerprints all over it and every film he makes now you're kinda worried about the leading lady being brainwashed into his whole nonsense like when he ate Katie Holmes' soul and she was never the same again. I mean, I know she wasn't one of his leading ladies but still. Anyways, yeah, it would be the worst film of the year had I not watched The Layover last night which was basically marketed as HEY UPTON HAS TITS AND DADDARIO HAS TITS SO WATCH THIS FILM and ends up being pretty much the most detestable and hateful film of the year and, so bad, I'm pretty sure my wife is filing for divorce after sitting through it. Eh, there was fuck all on TV last night so I apologise. They do have tits though. Which is, yeah, ok, TITS and all that.

BARNEY! Last couple of matches Jelle Klaasen had against Taylor and Norris, it was like wrestling or something. Literally, Taylor and Norris came this close and could sniff victory then Klaasen makes his comeback out of nowhere and is like BIG MOVE-BIG MOVE-BIG MOVE-FINISHER-FUCK YOU-DONE! Dude is pretty great.

I go to the Belfast leg of the Premier League every year and it's such a good live experience. In saying that, the alcohol probably helps in that you have 8000 or so drunk dudes up chanting and singing.

It's probably just us watching it, but Wright/Chisnall was pretty bonkers as well. Then Sky played a video package for Taylor which had a line from the much missed Sid Waddell (HE WOULDN'T GIVE A BLOB OF HIS SWEAT TO A MAN DYING OF THIRST) and it made me sad. Best sports commentator of all time.

For some reason, I always cracked up at MAYONNAISE at the end of Pine Barrens, which remains one of the best and most quotable episodes of TV I've ever seen. Neck and neck between Gandolfini and Ian McShane as Albert Swearengen for my all time favourite TV performance.

Can I count pop-punk-esque punk? Yes? Well, my wee country throws the following forward: I mean, I dunno, Teenage Kicks is kinda the best pop song ever made. It's 2 1/2 minutes of perfection.

Final episode wasn't that great compared with the rest of them but, still, overall, it's one of the best series of TV I've ever seen. I mean, only in this show could a friggin' UFO interrupting a shootout not be weird. If it landed in the middle of Bodymore, Murderland in the middle of The fucking Wire then it'd be weird as shit but it works in Fargo. Ideas for the 3rd series? I think Hawley's said it'll be set a couple years after the 1st series but I would totally be down with a rise of the Gerhardts series. That or anything involving Bruce Campbell as Ronnie Reagan again.

What a match. There's only word for it: MAGIC DARTS! It was a darts Sophie's Choice there for a while over who I wanted to win but then I thought, ah screw it, Barney's the underdog and I dig the shit out of him being the age old story of the old veteran who took down the guy who everybody thought was unbeatable. Dude's been my guy since he was rocking the BDO in the late 90s. I mean, MVG will probably win a gazillion more world titles in the future but I'd love for Barney to win it again this year. Can't see it though, I'm thinking maybe finally Wade or else one of Anderson/Wright/Lewis. Fuck a Phil Taylor though.

MARTIN FREEMAN! BEST PLACE YOU'VE EVER PISSED! WRANGLERS AND WHITE TEES...yeah, probably not the best idea in the world. Man, echoing the Kirsten Dunst love, I had no idea I'd come out of this thinking she was one of the best things in it. Plemons does really great browbeaten hangdog sad sack expressions but, wow, Dunst has knocked out of the park in the last two episodes. Peggy is one badass lady and her and Ed totally have to be the last two standing...apart from Lou, of course, because Lou, well, Lou: Seems like absolutely ages since Rye was killed, they've squeezed soooo much good shit into this series. I know there's an episode left but it's pretty much already one of the best series' of TV I've ever seen. And I saw George Hearst descend on Deadwood like a gruesome goo oozing smiling Leviathan. He'd have stood no chance up against Peggy motherfuckin' Blomquist though cause, you betcha, she's actualised and realised.

See, I didn't even catch that obvious visual callback when I was just watching it because I'm an idiot but that's pretty great. And now I want to watch Miller's Crossing again.

Aw, man, you got my hopes up too. Maybe he was Lorne Malvo's grandfather. Still, that was a badass scene. This fucking show though, they'll bust out some heavy duty carnage one minute then I'll be giggling the next when they throw in stuff like: 'Walk her out, huh?'/'What about you?'/I'm not saying don't come back' or Karl having to sleep on the sofa on account of his bad back (you know, it hurting when he sleeps on the floor) then the next minute they'll bring a tear to a glass eye with the 'Listen, if John McCain could sur...' scene. Bear was incredible in this episode. Liked them throwing in Danny Boy because it's a beautiful song and, hey, Miller's Crossing and all that. Snow will never not look fucking gorgeous on camera too, I mean, holy shit at those overhead shots. So...Ted Danson was abducted by aliens. Didn't see that coming.

So, ah, yeah, the 1st series of Fargo was the best thing on TV last year...and this series is even better. I didn't think Bruce Campbell as Ronnie Reagan extolling his war efforts in Operation Eagle's Nest while taking a piss could be bettered but then a slightly inebriated Karl A. Weathers busted out his Sledgehammer of Justice on the establishment's rogues and tools of the state and oppressed their jackboot tyranny. Reagan/Weathers spinoff stat. Hell, Reagan can make him part of his campaign team, if only so Karl can eventually find out if Joan Crawford really did have crabs. So many fantastic characters.

It's a French thing. I figure Carragher's reaction is due to the touch and not the news.

Yeah, I think one of the problems (amongst quite a few) Rodgers had was that a lot of Liverpool fans are sitting back thinking well, shit, Klopp and Ancelotti are out there twiddling their thumbs waiting to walk into a big job like that and would both be better than what they have already. Shit, almost certainly, I'd take Ancelotti over Van Gaal at United. Speaking of, were United playing today?

Werner Herzog.

Yeah, The Martian was super fun. I haven't read the book but it was a really enjoyable dynamic that, one mini tantrum aside, Watney was overwhelmingly positive and sarcastic in the face of overwhelming adversity and especially when played by someone as likable as Matt Damon. It's pretty much Scott's most purely enjoyable film in a long time.

Abramovich was in the stands looking fed up. Sky Sports dude asks Mourinho an innocuous question, he rambles on for 7 fucking minutes with Sky Sports dude holding the mic up for him the entire time thinking 'Jesus fuck, hurry up, my arm's killing me here' but basic gist of the Triple-H-opening-Raw-circa-2003 monologue was basically 'I'm a cunt.' On Match of the Day, he repeats the same point about the refs being afraid to give Chelsea decisions and MOTD dude goes 'k but what about the two penalties Southampton should have got?' and Mourinho's all 'yeah, I'm not answering that' and walks off. Meanwhile, another guy's sitting at home watching the whole thing and is all: All in all, if you dislike Chelsea (and you should), it was quite a good day.

My 8 year old niece started watching wrestling maybe 6 months ago mostly through me watching it when we were babysitting her. She now watches pretty much anything (including TNA. I really must have a word with her about that) but loves NXT way more than the WWE main shows. She likes Balor (even in scary Demon mode. She's kinda a badass), Becky Lynch and, shit, can even do Enzo Amore's schtick word for word (I'm sorry, as wrong as it is, it will never not be hysterical to me hearing a 8 year old Irish girl say I AM A CERTIFIED G AND A BONIFIED STUD. The complete 'the fuck?!' look my non-wrestling watching sister/her mum gave the 1st time she did it in front of her was priceless) but her absolute favourite wrestler by an absolute country mile is Bayley. She hasn't watched the show yet, it was the most fun I had watching a wrestling show in ages, I'm totally and completely looking forward to watching it again with her. Sometimes, wrestling just kicks fucking ass.

Alan Shearer in made a funny shocker. Host dude: Was it a fake result? Shearer: It was a fake result, without a doubt...Man City should have won 5 or 6 nil.

I only just watched the last episode, had to psych myself up to watching it after reading some of the shit about it. It was, ah, yeah, not good. The cruel bastards had poor Kelly Reilly film out in the fucking desert too. Ain't nobody notice she's a friggin redhead from England? Oh well, Fargo's back soon.

It was a fake result though. For fucks sake...

Holy shit, if they wrap up Deadwood, me and HBO will be totally hang fucking dai. I've been waiting nearly 10 years to find out just how handy with a knife that midget at the end was. I would completely and utterly have Dillahunt play a 3rd character too. Maybe a female. Dude is that good.

United are totally going to Greece 2004 the shit out of the Premiership this year by one-nilling their way to winning the whole damn thing. 38 games. 38 1-0 wins. 38 goals for. Zero goals against. You heard it here first. Nah...I remain...unconvinced. Need a centre forward badly but they don't exactly grow on trees. Rooney has looked like he's had one fish supper too many and has been hanging around too much with Lambert and Butler over the summer.

To be fair, I would react exactly the same way if I was interviewed by a global icon and a national treasure. I'd wear a wig just so I could hair twirl the shit out of it. Over the last couple of mornings I listened to the shower moonwalking episode on the bus to work, I'm pretty sure random strangers now think I'm crazier than a shithouse rat as I giggled to myself loudly. Then the fly tried to call a match with Austin? I died. I listen to Jericho's too and there's some good shit but, it's funny,with Jericho I'll usually skip straight to the interview because I can't listen to his pre-interview nonsense but I could listen to Austin talk about shower gel and mani-pedis and his long running feud with the Fly Family all damn day long. Dude is insanely likable.

Without spoilers...is this worth watching until the end?