So what'd you get for the holidays, Murgatroyd?

[The Natural]

A touchscreen smartphone which I've never had before, Grand Theft Auto V, Lego Marvel Super Heroes, WWE 2K14, a digital radio and complete box sets from The Big Bang Theory and Fawlty Towers,

[Johnny Sorrow]

I got a selection of things that don't really matter, but my Mum crushed it for the old man. He served in Berlin with the British Army, and she somehow found a book written about the British Army in Berlin by one of his old friends. Turns out he even got a call out in the acknowledgements.

That's fucking awesome.

[Marty Sugar]

I got to help break the news to my 9-year-old about Santa...on Christmas Day.

 

She just insisted on playing CSI Handwriting Analyst on the gift Santa gave us (I was so fucking broke this Christmas that Santa only gave us one family gift...the gift that my oldest really wanted), in regards to it not being the "right" labels that Santa uses (fuck my ex for being so damn thorough), and for the handwriting looking "just like mine" (even though I wrote lefty, I swear). 

 

Then she went snooping when she was supposed to help me with prepping for dinner, to find the remaining "Santa" wrapping paper in my storage closet.  So she kept pestering and pestering me, and upsetting her younger sister...all while driving me nuts and getting rather distraught herself. So she got a timeout in her bedroom and with her sister well out of earshot, she kept pushing the issue until Kristmas Kayfabe got broken.  She was not happy...but it's her own damn fault.

 

So I told her what my mother told me: you can continue with the façade and keep getting a gift from Santa, or you can be a know-it-all and get nothing. Either way, if she ruins it for her little sister (OR TELLS HER EFFEN MOTHER), she is in a world of shit. 

 

I told this story at work and made my one manager cry. She said it was the saddest family Christmas story ever.  God bless us, everyone.

[Buy Me a Burrito]

I sort of bitched on here about my confusion about what my wife got me for Christmas. Well, I'm posting here to eat crow. 

 

I went to hang out with a few friends the other day and came home to find that my wife had completely redecorated my home office.

 

 

In addition to being a communications dude for a church organization, I do some freelance writing and other stuff from home. I also have a blog.

 

Over the last year my home office has just sucked. My desk was falling apart and the room was being taken over by my massive book, CD and LP collections. My wife made a separate stealth trip to Ikea and bought a new desk for me as well as a big new bookshelf to replace the rickety old thing I had been using. That crappy animated GIF is a little shot of the small room that my cat and I share.

 

My wife's a nice lady.

[Zimbra]

Daaang, Burrito, that picure of your wife had better get hung with pride in that new office.

 

I used to have that same yellow chair.  Great little funky 70s chair.

[Buy Me a Burrito]

It's over the bookshelf. Her tits are hanging out in it. Squint and you can see it.