DangerMark Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 I'm impressed, a lesser man would have written that article in three words. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 26, 2021 Share Posted December 26, 2021 (edited) 115-5. Root out for 50 and just now Stokes for 25. Apart from Root and a rusty Stokes, shower of shite. Edited December 26, 2021 by The Natural Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 26, 2021 Share Posted December 26, 2021 (edited) 141-7. Funny moment when Ian Chappell on TMS said someone was talking bollocks. Missed who Ian was referring to. Joe Root or Chris Silverwood perhaps? Edited December 26, 2021 by The Natural Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DangerMark Posted December 26, 2021 Share Posted December 26, 2021 One or both, because I think this deserves an EngLOLand. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirFozzie Posted December 26, 2021 Author Share Posted December 26, 2021 It's like deja vu all over again. I think Joe Root needs to spend the next six months on a beach somewhere, and the rest of England can play associate teams to get their confidence back 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 26, 2021 Share Posted December 26, 2021 (edited) England would be fucked without Joe Root. Root can only do so much. We've had some bad battling lineups but I think this is the worst of them. I miss Bob Willis who'd tear them a new asshole on The Verdict. Edited December 26, 2021 by The Natural Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 26, 2021 Share Posted December 26, 2021 Different England, same problems Hameed's 10-ball duck was England's 50th this year - four short of the all-time Test record - and the right-hander's second in succession. He came forward on the front foot in defence and nicked Cummins to Alex Carey. Crawley was recalled in place of Rory Burns despite averaging 11.14 in 2021 but it made little difference. He lasted 25 balls, playing a couple of good strokes, before being squared up by Cummins and caught in the gully. Malan threatened to calm proceedings, again alongside Root, but the left-hander edged a ball pushed across him by Cummins in the final over before lunch, a crucial blow. In another familiar trend, Root again failed to record his maiden Test hundred in Australia despite looking close to his busy best. The England captain, who has been out between 50 and 90 eight times in his past eight Tests in Australia, was furious after he left the field following his dismissal. When Buttler followed Stokes, having skied a catch to deep square leg, there were stunned faces around the 57,000-strong crowd at the enormous Melbourne Cricket Ground. You could hear Jonathan Agnew's exasperation at Jos Buttler's dismissal. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 Australia 267-10. Lead of 82. Hour's battling for England to face though... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 38 minutes ago, The Natural said: Australia 267-10. Lead of 82. Hour's battling for England to face though... 8-2. Crawley and Malan in two balls. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 3 hours ago, The Natural said: 8-2. Crawley and Malan in two balls. 31-4. England trail by 51 runs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 England's opening partnerships this series: 0 23 7 4 4 7 #Ashes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DangerMark Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 Cricket is stupid, England are stupid and losing to the Upside Down is the worst. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
odessasteps Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 I wonder, given Covid, will they play all the tests if Australia win the first three? I presume yes, cuz $$$$. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 (edited) Edited December 27, 2021 by The Natural Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cleavy Posted December 28, 2021 Share Posted December 28, 2021 LOL England skittled by Boland in the 2nd innings Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 28, 2021 Share Posted December 28, 2021 England meekly surrendered the Ashes on the morning of the third day of the third Test as Australia crushed them by an innings and 14 runs to take an unassailable 3-0 series lead. Resuming on 31-4, England were bowled out for just 68 inside 81 minutes, with debutant Scott Boland taking an astonishing 6-7. Their final five wickets fell in the space of 30 balls as England offered the weakest of resistance in front of a jubilant home crowd at the Melbourne Cricket Ground. England's 68 all out is their lowest total in Australia since March 1904 and their ninth lowest score against them in Tests. The result means Australia have retained the Ashes after just 12 days of cricket and will be eyeing a 5-0 series win. The fourth Test will begin in Sydney on 4 January. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 28, 2021 Share Posted December 28, 2021 Pathetic. Just when you think it can't get worse, it bloody does. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 28, 2021 Share Posted December 28, 2021 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DangerMark Posted December 28, 2021 Share Posted December 28, 2021 (edited) 8 minutes ago, The Natural said: Pathetic. Just when you think it can't get worse, it bloody does. Nonsense. It just means that the dream is still alive for us opening the batting for England, because there's no way we can be worse. As bad, maybe, but not worse. And to answer @odessasteps's question, they won't cancel the rest of the series just because England are too shite to be allowed to play. Edited December 28, 2021 by DangerMark Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirFozzie Posted December 28, 2021 Author Share Posted December 28, 2021 English Cricket, English Cricket's fans, and England in general: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted December 29, 2021 Share Posted December 29, 2021 https://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/cricket/59816130 Yes. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cleavy Posted December 30, 2021 Share Posted December 30, 2021 now Boonie has Covid. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DangerMark Posted December 30, 2021 Share Posted December 30, 2021 So does the England head coach and whilst I hope he's okay, I think not having him around is not going to harm England's chances in the slightest bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SirFozzie Posted January 6, 2022 Author Share Posted January 6, 2022 Well, england found a way to avoid being skittled for all their wickets on day one. But that method is, sub-optimal (the Aussies winning the toss, batting, and putting up 400 runs before declaring) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Natural Posted January 7, 2022 Share Posted January 7, 2022 (edited) Jonny Bairstow scored the first 100 for England of the Ashes, unbeaten 103. Kudos to Jonny and Ben Stokes' 66 playing through injuries. Mark Wood's 39 from 41 balls as well. England 258-7. At one point, 36-4. Edited January 7, 2022 by The Natural Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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