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AxB

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Everything posted by AxB

  1. Stan Hansen was as blind as a bat, and it never did him any harm. It jut lead to him doing his opponents quite a lot of harm.
  2. I think the idiot read the phrase 'Black Timberlake' in your post, and assumed you were talking about @Elsalvajeloco because... who knows how his mind worked (assuming it does)?
  3. There's a comedian in England called Jimmy Carr. If you arrange all of his comedy DVDs in the order they came out, the titles read: Jimmy Carr: Stand Up Jimmy Carr: Comedian Jimmy Carr: Live Jimmy Carr: In Concert Jimmy Carr: Telling Jokes
  4. And Tyger Drew-Honey, from Outnumbered, 21 today. Son of Linzi Drew (who played Brenda Bristols in the Porn-film-within-a-film in American Werewolf in London, and quite a lot of actual porn as well) and Lindsey Honey (AKA Ben Dover, star of... loads of porn, oddly enough). Both his parents are porn stars called Lindsey. So of course he becomes a child actor/ BBC3 documentarian.
  5. Maybe he was just a really big Randy Orton fan who found all Orton's actual nicknames were taken, and didn't want to be called Legend Viper who hears voices?
  6. I only played MK1 in the arcade, never 2. 2 was just on Megadrive. I've done a bit of MK9 story mode, but it pissed me off by having a false ending. The tournament is over, you won, Earth is saved for now... oh wait, let's just have another tournament right now because that one didn't count because the bad guys didn't win. Already managed to complete an Arcade ladder, played as Kano all the way to the final, then couldn't beat Shao Khan because he takes no damage from anything (the X-Ray did as much damage to him as an uppercut does to anyone else), so I went cheap and played as Sheeva instead, and just did the Teleport Stomp over and over until he was dead. That was really easy.
  7. You know how comic book movies are always careful to be respectful to the source material? People who make videogame movies don't seem to think that's important. And it's based on a failure of mathematics: If Assassin's Creed games come out every year and make ten million dollars (I'm guessing), then it must be a story people want to hear. But whilst not everyone owns a games console, everyone can go to the movies, so therefore a movie's reach will be twice as big and we'll be rolling in receipts. They forget that games cost 8 times as much as movie tickets, and so you need to octuple the reach, not double it, to make the same amount of gross sales. Also, Hollywood producers are egomaniacs who want to prove they can succeed at something everyone fails at.
  8. I believe you've missed the point. I mentioned that higher up on this very page. See?
  9. Don't you just hate it whwn you enter a joke contest and don't win? Skip the first hour for the jokes. Should have known the Americans wouldn't get the Curry reference. I actually sent in two jokes,but they only read one. The other was What do you call a Krogan who's really into Bodybuilding?
  10. AxB

    WWE UK

    You know how TNA nearly had Sha Samuels at the same time as Samuel Shaw? WWE now has 2 guys called Tyler B. They should form a team. The Breeze and Bate Connection.
  11. He was a heelish guy in Damages, wasn't he?
  12. Well, there aren't many Superhero fights in the MCU where it's clear the villain is just after the hero and nobody else (because most of the fights are 'Save these people' or 'Save the World', rather than 'Save yourself'). Although obviously someone was filming the Chitauri invasion, because that kid was selling footage of it all season... If the Hulk was getting into it with the Abomination outside your front door, sure you'd run for it, and hope your house was still standing when they'd finished.
  13. I let Xav persuade me to buy Mortal Kombat 9 (the PS3 one, not MKX). Some of the moves are still the same as they were in MK2 20 years ago (except for there being two buttons for punch and kick instead of one). Took a while to remember to use the D-Pad instead of the analogue stick for beat em ups. My timing is terrible now, and it's not letting me do any Fatalities yet. It's OK, until it's impossible, and then it's not OK.
  14. AxB

    WWE UK

    It's odd that the top guys in the tournament (Tyler Bate, Pete Dunne, Trent Seven) all came out of the same Birmingham scene. But they couldn't really acknowledge why there was a Birmingham for them to come out of. Because it was carried on the back of Rockstar Spud and Dave Mastiff. Neither of whom's existence can be recognised by WWE at this moment. If they do get the WWE UK weekly show running, and then WoS doesn't get picked up, the Rampage & Mastiff invasion will be epic.
  15. I thought the point of Skyrim was that your one guy is the whole party. Where usually you'd have a Tank, a Stealth guy, a Mage and a Healer, in Skyrim you have one guy who's a Stealthy Tank Healer Mage.
  16. Say the new XXX this afternoon. It was pretty good. But it felt more like an alternative adventures of the Fast and Furious movie than a XXX sequel. It's like Vin has decided that he's only going to be part of an ensemble cast in all of his movies now, instead of being the 'name above the title' only star of the movie thing. And a lot of it was that whole "You mess with one of us, you're messing with all of us" deal from F&F, only they never actually said the word Family at any point. But it had the whole 'international racial diversity' with added porno-sexual politics (all women are assumed to be bisexual except the women who are just sexy lesbians; No men are anything but straight) and they made sure to remind us that Vin likes Game of Thrones by casting someone from that (It was the Hound this time). Cube was barely in it. Neymar might have had more screen time, and he barely had any.
  17. Luke Cage season One was a lot of fun. I really loved the way they play him as a pensive, thoughtful man who doesn't see brute force as the first or only solution to every problem. I love that he's a reader (and that at the start he was reading Little Green by Walter Mosley, because I read that last year). It's odd that, across the 4 Marvel Netflix seasons, the pacing has been all over the place and a lot of them seem like they had the wrong number of episodes. Daredevil season one was a slow burn, where they didn't even say Wilson Fisk's name until they were a few hours in. Whereas Jessica Jones was maybe an episode or two too long. Daredevil S2 was crammed and overstuffed and all over the place, and Daredevil's storyline dragged while Punisher's raced through. And then Luke Cage made you think it was going to be another slow one early, but then picked up more and more... right up until it peaked halfway through the final episode - then they did the GoT thing of having the end bit be a tad post-coital and here's hw we wrap things up and set up for the next thing. I really liked that the big final Hero vs Villain punch-up came with a crowd of bystanders watching and cheering. After all the scenes in the movies of citizens fleeing from Superhero fights, nice to see that Harlemites instead stand and watch.
  18. Don't listen to him, he's just jealous I have better opinions than he does.
  19. Why do all modern bands mis-spell their names? Because of the internet. If Chvrches had formed ten years earlier, they'd have been called Churches. I think Linkin Park started that (Limp Bizkit don't count because that's just down to Fred being too stupid to spell Biscuit.properly).
  20. The last show on Challenge was a 2016 recap show. The one before that was Hardy's Apocalypto. But none of that was as good as Austin Aries' title run. Or the MCMGs vs Beer Money feud. Or Styles vs Daniels vs Joe.
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