Johnny Sorrow

A few years ago I was at a WWE house show, and before it started this guy sat down behind me with his kids. We talked a bit, and he seemed like a nice, normal dude. His kids were excited, and everything was dandy. The opening match was Chavo vs. someone, and Chavo was doing the old stalling bit and then getting on the mic and heeling the crowd with stuff like, "Everyone in Colorado is fat and stupid!", the crowd was going nuts, but this same guy behind me went fucking crazy. He started screaming that he was gonna kill Chavo, he was frothing at the mouth, and literally had to be held back by another guy cause he was going to jump the rail.

To be fair , Sheik had a lit joint and the cops found blow in Sheik's mustache kit

By the way, I was a Trent Acid fan in 2005.

Eventually

It's ok, cause he's not him. It's an act.

You really aren't good at this. The discussion is "Name The Big Men Better Than Mark Henry", not "I'm A Sad Kid Who Tries To Troll." Seriously, don't be that guy. Your Mom loves you, and would say, "Son, don't."

A very special How I Met Your Mother. Actually, some Buffy where the dude killed her lesbian girlfriend, she becomes Dark Phoenix, tears his skin off...AND HE LIVES.

Nah, I'm painting you as "guy still trying to play internet troll, even though no one falls for it, who's never had pussy." Cause, c'mon. Really? Your feelings are SO STRONG that you just HAD to let people know that you don't dig Henry? Try again. With a new act.

He also had height. And he was part of that great group of WCW castaways who Vince grabbed while his stars were leaving who had an axe to grind and wanted to shove it down Bischoff's throat.

You're adorable. Right down to the Bret av. Hoardack, right?

Makes ya appreciate stuff like "The Shadow" and "The Phantom", as flawed as they are.

All that powder Hogan throws around in this WAR GAMES must be left over blow from the booking meeting where they came up with this shitty match. "Kamala's never smelled anything like that!" is the best line ever, I'll give it that.

Cesaro's the fucking man.

If Parker shit his pants, you couldn't see it. Looked like he pissed himself, though. Holy fuck, Hogan, Sting, Luger, Savage vs. Shark, Kamala, Zodiac, and Meng. This stinks. And looking ahead, it's just gonna keep on sucking, including the one that turned me off the NWO/ WCW.

One of my favorite things about ROH back in the day, was that they had guys who were vets like Carnage Crew who weren't "Indy Workrate Darlings".

Jim Ross has seen a lot of car wrecks olong the highway with bodies everywhere, apparently. DA vs Sting's Squadron, is fucking great. Windham dropping Arn headfirst between the rings is a killer spot. You got Madusa on the top of the cage with Sting, Paul E's written down gameplan, it's bloody as hell, (Shit, Dustin, Arn, and Austin look like the cover of an Apter mag from 82), the crowd is molten, Madusa taping up Eaton's hand before he goes in, Arn's white trunks stained red with blood, Nikita sacrificing himself to save Sting and then Sting and Nikita high fiving and hugging to show that Nikita is truly a good guy again, the ring and ropes getting torn apart and Larry using the iron as a weapon, Jesus Christ this rules, even if Jesse is edited out. Edit: Man, the 93 one with Shockmaster, Harlem Heat, and Davey Boy sucks outside of Dustin and Vader's opening part. Oh and Sid screaming "WE DEMAND SATISFACTION!" OK, Dusty just said that Col. Parker actually shit his pants after the Nasty Boys hit him stiff in the next one and that you can see it. I've seen this one a lot, but now I have to watch and see if that's true cause I never noticed that before.

Muscle- Bears? Back to WAR GAMES, Holy shit. does Sid almost kill Pillman. It's funny, cause before this one Dusty's talking about how at this time WCW was being run by corporate suits that watered down WAR GAMES, and then the next match is bloody as fuck and brutal. The only shitty part is El Gigante storming in to tell the ref to end it. And then he carries away Pillman like Rocky carrying away Frank N Furter. It is cool to finally see the heels win a WAR GAMES. Oh, Dangerous Alliance time now. And I never got the whole "Submit or surrender" tagline. What's the fucking difference?

I picked up the new WAR GAMES DVD set last week and I'm just getting around to watching it., now that I'm back to a nocturnal schedule doing DJ/ Kareoke gigs after getting fucked out of my day job. It's pretty awesome. They interview Dusty between all the matches, and he's always great. I sort of fast forwarded the first two since I've seen them both a hundred times. Then they include the first Tower of Doom match, and the best part of that was Precious' tits. I had never actually seen the third Horsemen one with Windham and it's fucking killer. You do have to laugh at the idea of The Horsemen having JJ back in the ring for the third one.

I called Jarvis becoming Ultron years ago. And let's all mark out at the idea of a live version of "Ultron...we would have words with thee."

Mark Henry is Kahless. God of the Klingons

That's fucking great.

I've been a fan of Marc Maron since I saw him on HBO almost 20 years ago, and his "WTF" podcast is fucking great. He's one of the best interviewers out there and can get a great show out of guests you'd think might not be that funny or interesting. His interview with Micheal Keaton was hilarious, and his one with Mel Brooks was fantastic. Really, everything is really good.

Big John Studd

Jericho put over two guys tonight on his way out. And it could only have happened because he 1. Embarrassed Ryback 2. Beat Axel previously The booking that people were shitting on wound up making perfect sense.