Gorman

Was the Kane in Spain born mainly on the plain?

Thoughts on Unforgiven 99 After Steve Blackman clobbered Val Venis with a kendo stick, security chief Jim Dotson cleared Blackman out of the ring and looked like a super tough guy. This never went anywhere, but Dotson certainly looked like a wrestler. Mark Henry looked great in his European title loss to D-Lo Brown. He had come a long way in three years, was cutting good promos, and he had the Sexual Chocolate gimmick. They should have pushed him up the card, not down, and he is the MVP of the show. Chaz got beaten up and kicked out of the WWF locker room for allegedly beating up his girlfriend, Marianna, who used to portray his mom. Then we immediately cut to Jeff Jarrett, who is doing a woman-beating gimmick but is not ostracized by the boys in the back. I didn't understand why Jimmy Korderas crossed the picket line instead of showing solidarity with the striking referees. It was hilarious how they came to the ring to beat him up in the main event. Luna and Ivory had a fun hardcore match, but when Tori tried to help Luna, Ivory wiped them both out. Then Ivory picked a fight with Fabulous Moolah and Mae Young and got clobbered. Billy Gunn's singles push died at the age of three months. The King of the Ring, who fought The Rock at SummerSlam, was back teaming with Road Dogg as the tag team champions. Al Snow and Big Bossman tried to make the Kennel in a Cell match work, delivering a bloody, hate-filled brawl. Bossman was brilliant in cutting through the roof of the cell to avoid the dogs. The problem was that the dogs were a complete non-factor and only cared about barking at each other. Curtis Hughes didn't work out as Triple H's bodyguard, but Chris Jericho gave him another chance at the same gig. Hughes interfered and got Y2J disqualified against X-Pac, so this didn't work out either. Mankind tried to keep his Rock & Sock team going during the Six-Pack Challenge main event, but he did put Mr. Socko on Rocky at the end of the match. Triple H won the vacant WWF title, even though he should have been stretchered out of the building after Mankind piledrove him on the steps.

"So, having re-re-disposed of the monster, exit our hero, stage right"

But "Dean Ambrose" doesn't start with R

Ziggler and McIntyre stealing Revival's title shot saved us from the possibility of Roman Reigns, Rollins, Revival and Ronda Rousey as Raw champs.

Thoughts on SummerSlam 99 The show started with a double title match and a double Vince Russo swerve! Not only did Mark Henry clobber his buddy D-Lo Brown with a guitar to give the IC and European titles to Jeff Jarrett, but the tension between Jarrett and Debra was fake! Russo loved to make heel groups argue throughout the show, only to reunite at the end. Edge & Christian were the stars of the Tag Team Turmoil match, even though The Acolytes won. E&C earned the crowd’s respect and the MVP award by defeating The “New Brood” Hardy Boyz, Mideon & Viscera, and Prince Albert & Droz. Chris Jericho and Road Dogg should have had a match instead of a verbal sparring session. Road Dogg tried to do live commentary while following Al Snow and Big Bossman around during their hardcore title match, and that didn’t work, either. Something strange was going on in that match with Snow’s dog, Pepper. Snow talked to the dog in his carrier right before going to the ring for the match. Later, Bossman used the dog carrier as a weapon and said “How do you like that, boy?” to Pepper, who we didn’t see on camera. After the match, the announcers said Pepper was fine and wasn’t even in the carrier during the match. Sounds like a lot of angry dog lovers blew up the phone lines after Bossman’s attack. Ivory beat Tori to retain the women’s title after a horribly botched sunset flip. Before you could say, “Well, at least they were trying to wrestle instead of just offering T&A, “ Ivory tried to rip off Tori’s top. Ken Shamrock and Steve Blackman had another cool gimmick match with their Lion’s Den Weapons match, a rare combination of specialty matches. Blackman really came off as a master of weapons, but Shamrock ironically knocked him out with a kendo stick. Undertaker and Big Show won the tag team titles with another Russo trope: partners who don’t get along. Big Show didn’t pin X-Pac because he made an arrogant cover. Undertaker angrily tagged in and put X-Pac away with the tombstone piledriver. The new champs weren’t even the only feuding partners on this show, as Crash and Hardcore Holly beat each other up during the tag team turmoil match. Everyone bags on Billy Gunn for his failed singles push, but he had a very good match against The Rock. The problem was, he was portrayed so much as a tag team wrestler throughout his career – even while winning the King of the Ring tournament – that nobody gave him a chance of beating The Rock. Mankind won the WWF title in the main event, but he was overshadowed by the feud between Steve Austin and Triple H. Jim Ross said we would get an interview with the new champ, but the show went off the air while Stone Cold was brawling with HHH.

That's not good. I use those to prepare for announcing.

Sorry to be the nitpicky editor, but the title of this thread should say it's Slammiversary 16, not 14.

This is the message board equivalent of "I have until five, ref!"

Kids these days ... their attention spans are pretty short

I was myself (Jeff Gorman) while Gabe was Chris Lovey

Maybe they will put my play-by-play stuff (which starts with Glory By Honor) up in December as a birthday present.

I've got Cody winning the ROH and NWA titles and throwing them BOTH down like Shane Douglas and declaring himself the new super-everything World champion. It's even more dastardly because his dad held the NWA World title. You heard it here first.

(raises hand) Give me Joe Dombrowski and Kingdom James (my IWC Pittsburgh partners from the early 2000s) and we're good to go.

I guess Sags got an exemption to the Jackie Robinson rule that retired No. 42 across the board.

They actually flew him to the UK so he could wrestle Roman on the Raw tour opener.

This is great, so it kills me to be the Ohio native to point out that Youngstown is on the east side of the state.

The only way this makes sense if they want to sell the footage to WWE for use on their premium version of the Network. At any rate, I would love to see the matches I announced for ROH see the light of day somewhere. They were pretty good, you know?

The only time my kid was in the locker room was when she was on my back in a baby carrier.

The Empire Elbow and the East River Crossing (side slam)

He really is a one-man crew. He's the wrestler and the fan. He probably also manages himself.

CFO$ Tweeted about it, so I think it's them.

Jamie Frost was our backstage interviewer at the CKCW New World Rising iPPV, using the name Ellie Fredricks. She also managed Shane InYaFace on the pre-show. I think they also work for IWC, because IWC's Twitter congratulated her on appearing on Raw in her first professional match (!)

Speaking of predictions, I'm calling Big Show as Braun Strowman's mystery partner, and they're winning the Raw tag titles. I was right last year about the Hardys crashing the ladder match and winning the same belts, so let's see if I can make it 2 for 2.

Is this a hint that AJ Styles is moving to Raw in the Superstar Shakeup?