assfax

The Kiss thread will just get derailed into wrestling discussion.

Remember when Freddy Kruger is like "Who were those guys?" at the end of the Dokken Dream Warriors video? This is the video where Freddy wakes up with titanium morning wood.

Greg Ganja VS KoKane. Book it you cowards!

Beauty Pair vs. Queen Angels I'm very unversed in this whole era but always love what I see. They always have this wild and wooly unsupervised kids living room brawl quality. First fall comes in hot 'n' nasty after a kick ass reverse suplex. I don't know who's who with the IQ and my own uninitiation but there's a dropkick that just crumples a girl into the ropes like she fell off a building. Second fall is weirdly uncontested. Didn't even try to break it up. Third fall starts with this cool bearhug spot where dude just elbows the girls she's holding into a pin. Where was the ref? Sippin' booze on the side probly. There's a surfboard where guy just gets stomped right in the chest. Brutal. FREAKING INSANE dive over, I believe, the top rope. Wow. Wish they cut that better so you could appreciate the madness. Didn't quite understand if that was a stoppage or a countout for the last fall. Mami Kumano vs. Yumi Ikeshita - 5/XX3/79 First of all, I love when these old ass joshi matches have fuzzy Mega Man X dates. Feels like you're getting to see one of those lost Johnny Carson episodes. Mami Kumano was a fast favorite with a lot of standing on the hair. Good headbutt combo to start out. Ikeshita has this cool side suplex powerslam thing. Does an awesome apron to ring crossbody that is just the right amount of home cookin'. Proto-powerbombs bring major funkitude. Brings the mic into the ring and starts chokin' a motherfucker. Soundtrack: Return to Forever Romantic Warrior. Johnny Walker Black and Coors Banquet. @Matt D DOK RIVERS VS HACK MEYERS https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqN1vCS_zFw I also looked up this other match and didn't like the image quality on the one that was out there so I ripped my old AJ TV DVD version. I assume this isn't as much of a deep cut as I think it is but my old DVD had a sharpie remark that said "Fuchi rulin'"

Battlarts on FIGHTING TV SAMURAI! 01_21_1997 Kept you waiting, huh? Opener: Hidaka's debut and this is about as succinct as you can get. This has awesome catch sparring with much forearm grindage. Funaki punctuates the boy's equilibrium with a tasty tombstone. We talking full "pepperoni and cheese" Oregon Trail monument. Deadly serious kneebar for the insta-tap. I'm assuming those were his parents they showed in the crowd. Five very blissful minutes of discipline, honor and respect. 2nd Match: Hoshikawa with a bitchin' X-Files shirt in the pre-match VTR. First time I've ever seen him and I'm already rootin' even though Otsuka should be easy money. Otsuka is a guy I just mostly remember from early Prides with that Ruas victory and when he had Sasuke cornerman him for the Igor fight. He had the dropkick in the PS2 Pride FC game. Mostly loved Hoshikawa's rugged-ass waterwheel. 8 Man: Yes, this was six shades of fucktangulous awesome. I seen 2 dudes rushing back to their seats, with double fisted beers, before Kaientai came out and knew it was gonna be a major shitshow. Yakushiji I was completely unfamiliar with. I saw him and was like "this wimpy guy is going to have the most insane acrobatic shit if he's hanging and bangin' with these heavy hitters." When they did the elbow drop on the table with that old ass IBM keyboard with the perfectly timed collapse. MMM MMM. That was so funky they put it in the highlight reel. I agree. Dick Togo does this cool backwards flying headbutt right to the chest. Naniwa throws killer lariats. It was when the mask got ripped off and the sangre de cangrejo started flowing that this thing went into magic land. This is like if Buronson did covers for Apter mags. Dick Togo sets a chair down, sees it's fucked up, and still goes 120% poetry in motion into the corner just to get blasted right into same chair. Hamada does an insane grisly tornado DDT with just that perfect patois of extra diagonal stank. Then, Naniwa one ups that with his own damn finger of god tornado DDT. Gettin' meteorological up in this mother. Hell, didn't even mention Sasuke's killer anti-air dropkick counter when Taka trys to springboard. Tanaka vs Tiger Mask: This one bored the piss out of me. Sayama started out a little bullshido-y with some of those opening florishes. Settled into what I think I'm getting when I hear "shoot style". Missing major x factor. Did have major ice upped Tiger Mask nipples. MAIN: Strong start with rutting bucks before the bell. Usuda gets Ishikawa on the ropes with a flurry and Ikeda just starts laying into him as well from the apron. If it's legal, it's moral. He comes back with a devastating headbutt THEN a flying headbutt. This is some Batman shit. Awesome finishing rush with Ikeda coming in for a break and then doing one of the hugest haymakers of all time. I'll be conservative and only give this show 2 trillion stars. This got me thinking who I'd want to see in Battlarts from comicbooks. I settled on a tag match with Ben Grimm (Everlovin' Thing) & Puck vs Batroc (The Leaper) & Matt Murdock (law-talking guy.)

12-7 Stardom Opener Kouzen deal. Awesome and the surprise return wasn't just stunt booking. I mean it is but it isn't. High Mate/BMI 2000: Blah. Korakuen was better. Wing Gori/Crazy Sky Tigers. I mean I love the result but this was very wimpy. Rian/Waka: Kinda good. This was a secret New Blood match. Stars/Neo Genesis 6 man. This was very cool. You've got me praising Amasaki on that little kickoff tornado DDT. This had maybe not so subtle layers. Mei vs Momo Kohgo is just some complete bullshit. Ranna should be on 1/3 in a title match and not in an unannouced zero-match. Finish was good with a follow up on the recent 3-way and AZM and Matoi hackin' some shit out. H.A.T.E. VS God's Eye:: THIS WAS AWESOME. So multifaceted. So fun. So joyous. This is one of those ones that'll be on DVD comps in 2040. Yoneyama is back? I didn't hear peep about this 'til I saw the match. Is it a custom Fukigen fan or what the hell was that she got out the crowd? I need it. Match was also enhanced with a major John Lennon playlist. I was into some Plastic Ono during the meat. High Mate VS FWC: Well holy shit. Wing Gori vs Whatever the hell their name is. Seriously, what is that submission Poi is going for doin'? She's pulling towards the regular arm bending way.

Tonight I got hooked on the small (but growing) feud with Little Mean Kathleen and Liviyah on these Pro Wrestling Supershow events. They're brawling their asses off. Liviyah was an instant favorite. LMK is the personification of the Crispin Glover Letterman kick.

Hopefully this means new gear for Yuki. I'm over the multi-ribbon patriotic bow outfit. Then again, I'm of the opinion that HIMAWARI could take over the country with a gothic cyberpunk refresh. Have her team with plague doctor Toribami. Cassowaries from hell. Other goodness: HIGH MATE VS TEAM 200KG for 1/3. Big girls don't cry. They suplex. Now it's Suzu's turn to cry. Haven't watched Chihiro vs Hanako yet but I'll safely give it a preemptive billion stars. Maybe they'll do the extra 10 minutes that Himeka/Hashimoto needed. This 12/1 High Mate match also felt like Hanako really stopped her rookie era and became just one of the guys. Her best hair to date as well. Those blue tips with the black hair. Even Poi's extensions looked good. She must've called up Misa Matsui's guy. You can tell the girls had access to a good setup and stylist. Everybody had killer hair these past two shows. Rian had cute double buns. Daichi got his Grecian renewed. Hina had spectacular prom hair on the 3-sisters show, and her hair always looks amazing. Saya Iida's new do is making me want wing★gori VS Zones and Soy at the next New Blood. Loser trims mullet. Or maybe reunite Maximum za MINI. Reinstate Hank Williams. Also, every time Maika and Hanako crack open those Sapporo tall boys I'm just thinking "yuck, Sapporo is awful". Is that the Fosters of Japan? Or is it one of those "well if you had it in country it's actually good" bullshits? Get Session Moth Martina and Natsu Sumire on the Horn and book them vs High Mate on a SenJo show. Quote from Momo Kohgo: "I lost to a rookie team that was formed today." Yep. Quote from a hoarse Suzu Suzuki: "I'm Jaguar Yokota." Not yet. Hate Supreme vs wing gorpy: The post match brawl was better than the match in toto. All champion 3 way: This match was just not happening. Especially when it smelled like a time limit. If you see Mei Seira and wonder how the hell they're not booking into a corner usually that means a great TLD. Coolness evaded this occurrence. If you watched that show and didn't mark out every time you saw that little midget dude in the front row, you're in the wrong business. Love that guy. I'm thinking Mayu Iwatani is going to try to do the Unagi/Sareee major independent (totally commited) freelancer thing. She might take half a year off. Maybe a Marigold run but mostly losing her ass doing produce shows every four months. Now, if AZM doesn't beat the damn dude that gums up the works. Come on. Let damn Zoopi win. End the reign of terror. Bring our boys home.

Quest is officially in Xmas 1988 NES territory. There's plenty of cheap Quest 2s out there and Q3 has two tiers that are rock solid as a standalone wireless device. I think the free Batman game only comes with Quest 3/S3. It only runs on Q3. Very good game. I headbutted my own hands. My only complaints are shitty onboard audio and you need to upgrade to a Kiwi comfort strap and face pad. As a Oculus Rift CV1 and Reverb G2 owner my Q3 is the most friction free headset I've used. You put it on and you're in. No "okay why the fuck isn't this working I've changed nothing and it's not working what the fuck" moments. G2 has massively superior a/v quality but everything else surrounding it is shitty, busted and expensive to replace. With the massively overpriced link cable I have all my old oculus rift and steam vr games accessible. My understanding is that the only big difference with Quest 3S is slightly less resolution. Kids will not complain.

My first move. Turn up your subwoofer.

Stardom 3 Sisters Homecoming Natsuko made a little kid cry so this is already well north of a million billion stars. Wild results in some of those league matches. Main event had about 149 different subtle layers. I'm loving when Rina did the bouquet shot and the damn chief of police that gave it to her is clapping. Is there a name for these young-ass middle girls that debuted before the "Golden Generation"? Gori-san excluded natch. VERY nice to see a packed house.

He didn't say fudge.

TJPW 11th BIRTHDAY Misao/Neko VS Kiryu/HIMAWARI This is that shit where they say "more than the sum of it's parts". Misao is finally getting back in the New York groove here. Major fun here. Kamiyu/Wakana VS Shoko/Yuki This had passion fury and humor like a Weird Al DiMeola Malmsteen record. If you are a fan of 120% Shoko this is the shit. Some of her best stuff since the Watanabe Korukuen match. Another thing that had me laughing my ass off is potato head superfan in the front row snoozin' during this barnburner. Pookie is done. Dude's probably on the wrong end of a 96 hour work week. Old guys sleeping in the front row is one of my favorite things. Up Up Girls VS Mizuki/Daisy Monkey/Yoppy First of all, it's great to see UUG as a team fighting. Very awesome stuff. Multiple times during the match I thought "Suzume is looking killer!". Yoppy and Raku were weak points that didn't need to be in there. Uta's 3-point second turnbuckle dropkick keeps looking great. Miu gets to showcase her older sister strength. Does it go without saying that Mizuki rules? Main Event Ye got the two biggest stars in the whole company as champs and nobody in their right mind are rooting for them. Yamashita was pure brutality. Just a nasty girl. This had awesome lineage. There's history with Toga and Miyu. There's history with Maki and Haru. All the shit with Toga and Yamashita was tough as a motherfuck. Very 'eavy, very 'umble. Match was a god damn. I'm also loving the part where daylight savings time makes it so I can watch these matinee shows before midnight!

My new obsession: Jasmine records releases of these old awesome ultra raunchy early bluesman sides. I'm starting slow, I've copped the Wayne Bennett, Pat Hare and Earl Hooker ones. I was on a massive Gatemouth Brown kick lately as well.

Needed to go to wal mart and get some Arnold Palmer and knew there was a deal on Gran Turismo 7 for 20 bucks. 'Bout time that thing got cheap! I'm guessing if I ever actually put the disc in it's going to need to download 230 GBs of shit and install for 89 minutes. This double sawski deal pr'y also indicates that it's coming to PC. I'm still in the middle of being massively disappointed with Ys X though. There are like 4 different environments and the ship combat still bores the tits off me after about 16 hours. Y'ever played Sea Dogs? Now that was a cool pirate game. Regular combat (bread and butter of the series) is super boring. There is just running your four specials then switching character and repeat. I've heard this is really long. The fluff has fluff. I've said Ys VII was the greatest Dreamcast game never made. Well, this is the worst excesses of the PS3 given unctuous flesh. This is making me want to get back to playing Scarlet Nexus with that UEVR mod. Or maybe that Rebel Transmute game. Or finish Animal Well. Or get serious about finishing Vigil: The Longest Night. Or that Natsu-Mon: 20th Century Summer Kid game. Nine Sols looks cool. Or I could take a nap in the afternoon.

Just got 2K24 on steam. Is there really no way to just search a name in the downloadable wrestlers shit? There's some amazing shit and there are utter abominations. I'm also hating when there's some unlockable shit that won't let you download something. Then there was an awesome Yunamon that had a "content is damaged" error. I'm definitely digging the gameplay more than 22 (last one I played) where I literally googled "wwe 2k22 how do I get up". I have a million hours in Smackdown 2 Know Your Role. I shouldn't be stymied in the tutorial!

This seems less intimidating than the 80s joshi set. I'm putting a hand in! Does it need to be youtube/dailymotion stuff? I only subscribe to wrestle universe and stardom world. I won't just be pimping modern joshi! Just mostly. I'm still firmly acquainted with the manly arts. Just mostly. Can I get a slight clarification of the aim of this thread though? Is it guys trying to freak out other dudes prurient tastes or everybody just kinda chiming in on shit? Like, you get a white elephant guy and try and cater to his greatest fears?

He just didn't want to clean up the afterbirth.

TJPW LIVE TOUR 2024 AUTUMN｜11.22 Big fun show. What's the deal with Shinjuku FACE? Are the crowds just generally hipper and cooler? Why the hell doesn't Stardom run there that often? Burning Venus & Zara Zakher vs Mizuki & Toribami. I've been loving Aino's new flowy "Mrs Claus on a cold Valentines day" gear. I need Zara vs HIMAWARI. It's inevitable. Mizuki has the soul of some 13 year old redneck backyarder that tragically died after jumping off the roof of his trailer back in '95. I think there are about 20 light novels with that premise out there now. I was reincarnated as a 40 kg magical sugar rabbit. I wish they could get Toribami in the hyperbolic time chamber for a year training with God's Eye. Her lucha high flying stinks but her flashy shoot style stuff really sings. Mostly Zara kicks ass. Love her spinebuster. Haru vs Toga First of all, I'm going in one billion percent rooting for Haru. It was when I saw Wakana crying in the corner near the end that it really started getting dusty in the room. Toga is still amazing but she and HIMAWARI are the upper echelon of the '23 rookies that don't benefit from these small tourneys. Haru has been really kicking ass since about May when she did some tags with Shoko and started upping her in ring flash. Still hate that old time arm pulling move. Runa had the counter for it. Thankfully, Toga elbowed a big chunk of Clearasil off her face to wake her up. Another good thing from this Next Generation Tournament was the continuation of the budding rivalry with Kira Summer and Toga. What was with Miki Fortune coming in? Was it just the one show? Didn't look great but come on! Give her an actual tour. Main Event Weird match. It was like dudes were going at 75% speed. Had me furrowing my brow a lot. Nothing objectionable or bad just weird how careful they were going. Was somebody hurt? Is Shazza just being cautious due to not working many Japanese matches? Yuki is great for what I can only call a special attraction. I used to go in with the "who is this part-time ass motherfuck?" mindset but her title defenses are always coherent and actually great. I think I'm still partial to that LA Taylor Korakuen defense. Suzume as next challenger has about as much bite as the Moka match. Arisu should've won a couple months ago.

This made me look up Tom Armstrong's Marvin and first of all I can't believe it's still going and #B it looks like garbage nowadays. Marvin was the shit before Calvin and Hobbes.

Lawler the wrestler: Classic EC comics. Lawler the announcer: Cracked magazine.

Stardom 11/23 ♥DEVIL/PRINCESS♥ VS H.A.T.E. SUPREME. I'm cranking up some Mercyful Fate 9 and drinking much Woodford Reserve. Nothing else on the show could even walk in the same sun as that match. Kinda liked the EXV opener.

Dust Devil is one of those ones where I got it on the old ass netflix where they mailed the DVD to you. That falls under the realm of Alex Cox Straight To Hell where it sounds awesome but then you see it. Dust Devil reminded me of old Fox TV movies. I think Mirror Mirror is the Citizen Kane of 1990 shlock,.

Stardom 11/20 Well, wing★gori vs Starfox wasn't what it could've been. Feels like they got crunched out for time. The Iida/Kohaku chopfest was fun. The part where Mei and Hanan fought was truncated. That New Blood West 1 match is still legendary in my eyes. Is their whole rivalry just kind of them going into business fer themselves? Were they not supposed to go that heavy at NB? FWC vs 02line: I liked it! Stardom 11/21 Kohaku was kicking major ass. She had Roddy Piper cocaine energy going on. Check out her apron backting. 10 man with the rookie: Didn't love nor hate the debut match with Hanan. This stands out because Yuna sells a bodyslam from Hamabe like Bobby Heenan. She has flash with the Misawa headscissor escapes. Her debutante rollup sequence looks nice and snappy. She does that thing where the hairband gets toasted and the locks are flowing. Big negative points for Momo Kohgo blowing her crappy TJPW-style crawl up the ropes springboard (again). That was a set down the beer naked gun facepalm momento. Azusa Inaba was seriously great. She ain't just in there doin' a manicured formula. This was a secret Future title defense. Most highest recommendooty-toot-tooski.. Psyqueen's entrance gear kicks ass. 'nuff said. Remember when I was saying SLK needed to use that awesome gear from the crossover show with Subu Badoozkie? Well, it happened and it was awesome. So killer. Even got another cool mask. If this is how they break up Crazy Star I don't care. Remember when MaiHime had to end but then the Divine Kingdom rose up? This is like that X2 with the Starfox revival. Bring in Kohaku to Neo Genesis! Reinstate Hank Williams in the Grand Old Opry! Seriously, this Tag League has me saying on damn near every match "oh I fuckin' love this team!".

Table is fully fucking loaded. There's also actual thought behind all the toys and mechs and not just some mish mash of shit just because they have the parts. Cool topper too. When people talk about great theme integration, this is what I expect. Remember Led Zeppelin? What the fuck was that? Where were the misty mountains? Where was the little Bron-Yr-Aur cottage? Where was the Black Dog? Where was the spinning LZIII cover for mystery awards as a full featured backglass thing like Scared Stiff? No stairway to heaven ramp? Denied! Where's that confounded bridge? Steve Ritchie pinched the tip and saved all his good ideas for Elton John. That longstanding split with Army of Darkness license is actually good in this instance because we could get a second table eventually! Spooky is hit or miss for me. Of their recent output I friggin' hated Halloween/Ultraman, liked Rick and Morty and was lukewarm on Scooby Doo. Haven't played The Looney Tunes/TCM one yet. My dream table from them would be Phantasm. Some agglomeration of the first three films.