Curt McGirt

This is absolutely fucking hilarious

Carmella might be doing good right now, but if you think WWE isn't just being stubborn and telling y'all "we were right the first time! You're not my daddy, I do want I want", then...

Clearly the latter two squashed their kayfabe beef haha Also, it is really weird seeing Baba and Inoki standing next to each other. That is an OLD OLD photo.

It amuses me that it's just a sleeper with a body scissors added. Like sleepers have been used forever and a day and broken by babyfaces everywhere, they aren't exactly protected.

Good lord that is stupid. You'd think with Sasuke's ego he'd want it Blu-rayed and in every household imaginable.

I love love love Maximum Overdrive but that isn't making the list for obvious reasons. If you or someone else works either that or Graveyard Shift (OR SILVER FUCKING BULLET) onto their list though, I will give a Sid-level fistbump just because

Booooo! Bernard was great back when he was beating the shit out of Tanahashi. He also had that awesome New Japan Cup final against Hirooki Goto.

When is that Sasuke documentary supposed to come out again?

How come I never thought about Stephen King movies? Carrie and Pet Semetery are going on the list. Shit, if the first half of Cujo wasn't all boring exposition, it'd be on there too. The Shining is going to be problematic

I think this is the Burr rant. Go figure... it's Philly That is so Not Safe For Work in case you are as stupid as he says the crowd is

If you haven't seen Burr shut down a heckler with malicious intent then go look it up. I think he goes on a rant that shits on the whole city and the crowd is ready for his head at the end of it. IIRC he starts counting down the minutes he has left onstage in between insults. It's just vicious.

Ah, I didn't see the 2013 notification, thought it was new

Lawyer saying that Enzo should use his shirt for a blindfold because he's in front of a firing squad was the only time he's made me laugh in decades.

Is that Itami with the hat next to Takayama or am I seeing things? For that matter, if it is, why didn't they have him wrestle? The disgusted face on the guy next to him makes that photo

That reminds me of this, where the exact same thing happens to Pogo Hilarious

It only took seeing Pirata Morgan literally sucking the blood out of somebody's head. Everybody always said you were vampires! (Jesus, did Morgan throw away his patch and blade his fucking EYE SOCKET?!)

I've seen this before but I think it has better VQ than the version I saw. Either way that is A LOT OF FUCKING BLOOD. Full ten on the Muta Scale. When you see Park's shown up in his white costume you know what's gonna go down. Dunno what the best part was: Park thrashing Santo with the beer bucket or the screencap above where you can watch the blood run right out of Santo's mask and down his face. It seemed like Park was having a hard time getting the juice flowing but Santo said "okay, fuck it, I'll do it" and all of the sudden Park's chest is completely red. Still one of the worst of all time finishes though and that's saying something

Phil reviewed this in Segunda so I gave it a go. I've never seen a Motegi match or anything from Wrestle Factory (who was behind that fed? Goto?). Phil said Goto wrestled like Tenryu but I think Miyake was even more like him, he really went after Motegi's cut like a shark. And god does Motegi have the worst hair, it's like he brought a photo of Chono to the Japanese Supercuts and said "something like that". I have a mohawk and I still think that's a bad look. If you're a fan of WAR main events or early Big Japan give this a watch.

I have to admit I was only half watching that match, thus the one-line review.

John Steadman's monologue in The Hills Have Eyes is one of the great moments in horror cinema, btw. It pulls the trigger on everything going horribly wrong in such a dramatic, awesome way. As poor as Rabid is, The Hills Have Eyes is so fantastic. I swear I could show it to most anyone younger than me and despite the family being so asshole Wonder Bread (until they aren't), it would hold up.

I meant down to Ziggler's level. Hardwick has a couple good lines every episode, usually, though I watched some of one of his standup specials once and... yeah. Ziggler was worse than that.

Rabid was (and is, all night) on The Movie Channel (along with The Hills Have Eyes) and it was fun to see it again. I would really like piranesi to review it because there is so much ridiculous shit in that movie. It's a really not very good ripoff of Night of the Living Dead that also has egregious '70s wardrobes like Marilyn Chambers wearing either furs or her birthday suit most of the time. I swear one dude has cowboy boots that come up to the back of his knees, and another guy has green leather pants! There is only one moment of real horror and pretty much the rest of it is cheap schlock, which is weird because Shivers before this and The Brood after were masterpieces. I'd still rather watch it over Scanners though. EDIT: I forgot to mention that this is set in Quebec at X-mas time, and there is little to no inclement weather, just a couple patches of snow on the ground. And a cop shoots Santa Claus in the mall!

Hey Phil (Schneider): that match was eight minutes ^^^

KAMAITACHI/RICOCHET: 16 and a half minutes of MOVEZ~! Literally nothing but flying and bombs. Amazing athletics, no psychology at all. NAITO/JUICE ROBINSON: It's Joose! He looks pretty wary to start, downright scared actually. Gotta love Naito's slow roll out of the ring after the pose. Tranquilo, baby. At least Juice is smart enough to pull HIS headbutt. He has no problem eating the rail again and again though. Naito uses said rails to try and take out Juice's legs and he does a great job selling the destruction. Tetsuya spits at the announcer and yanks on Juice's dreads to add extra dickishness to the proceedings. Damn, Juice busts out a hell of a spinebuster (and of course JR namedrops Arn). Naito tries to German Juice off the apron but he has a death grip on the ropes, then manages to spinebust him on the corner of the apron which is just crippling looking. Liger and the announcer both lose it for that one. He's still no match for Naito ripping and tearing at the knee -- kicks, elbows, a chop block, the modified Sambo Lock (which I still want to see end a match sometime). Naito makes the mistake of trying to rana him off the top but he gets absolutely flattened with a powerbomb. It looked like Juice came down with all his weight right on top of him. He keeps going for that Killswitch but no dice. They do a ton of nice reversals in the last couple minutes and Naito finally hits Destino on one of them for the pin. Juice is one hell of a young talent and Naito continues to come up with the best matches in NJPW. Tanahashi comes out and reads an invisible letter to Naito afterwards to challenge for the belt and it's pretty funny, calling him a bastard and a son of a bitch, but that can't break the tranquilo. OMEGA/ISHII: They start this one up with no bullshit, both men are in the ring and Ishii is working as fast as Ricochet did. We get a nice near-countout from an apron powerbomb and... damn... another headbutt. And another. Right after Shibata went in the hospital, nobody learned anything. Damn, Omega hits a NASTY DDT after they chop the crap out of each other with Ishii acting like every chop is just the worst. Omega starts to work on the neck after the DDT for good reason, while JR and Warmaster ramble on about motorcycles for no good reason. Like a complete idiot Omega slaps Ishii and even spits in his face which is basically the most stupid thing anyone could do. Ishii hits a great spinning back-chop right to Omega's throat and Omega hits a wild springboard press that blasts Ishii right in the face. They match those with a knee and a lariat that look completely horrifying... and two more headbutts. Barnett: "the world's most violent fire hydrant". SHIT! Ishii hits his own fucking Poisoned Frankensteiner! THAT is something I never EVER expected to see. Still, it ain't enough. Barnett says it looked like it could go either way and really it could. Only twenty minutes and though it was brutal, both guys sold well and there was no real overkill. At least, as compared to some other things Omega's been involved in recently... I dunno. Maybe I'm giving these two a pass because I like them, especially them together. The psychology of the damage to Ishii's barely-existent neck was continued through the match so I really have no problem with this, great match that smokes that crap with Okada. OKADA/FALE: Write your own review

Re: Ziggler on @Midnight, crossposted from the TV thread