Gordlow

That was a really nice, satisfying finish to the main event today. I LOVED SAP's matching gear and loved seeing them on TV again. The hour always flies by. Dynamite is (once again) STACKED next week! But to me a simple hour of entertaining pro wrestling and associated bullshit (like we got today) is often every bit as satisfying as a jam-packed supershow.

100% agree. That being said... Perhaps there would be money to be made and fun to be had in a Tony Nese (or Pretty Peter) growing a moustache and a mullet, donning a sequined robe, and entering the ring to intone: "Consider this a BoPo trigger warning: What I'd like right now is for all you adipose-ally gifted, differently-fit plant-based pork substitutes to keep the noise down while I take my robe off and show absolutely anyone who is sexually attracted to the male form what a cis male body that rigidly conforms to outdated societal norms looks like." Or, on second thought, maybe there wouldn't be much money to be made or fun to be had there, after all.

I would like to suggest a temporary name change from The Acclaimed to The Acclaimers. Have them wear glasses. Possibly kilts. "And I would rap 500 bars and I would rap 500 more/ Just to BE the man who scissored Daddy Ass/ In Toronto at Forbidden Door."

F%&# that $#@t! DOCTOR LUTHER IS GOING TO BE ON OUR TVs AGAIN! Nothing else matters.

Not to suggest that anyone here is doing this at all, but if I was booking AEW and announced Kenny vs Ospreay II and Bryan vs Okada, and people were, like, "Yeah. OK. So, what else are we getting?" I would probably lose my shit. That being said, I can hardly wait to see what else we are getting. I LOVE Forbidden Door. The build to Forbidden Door is really exciting, for me. Plus All Together (this weekend) looks AMAZING. Plus, the info that came out during Dominion has me even more stoked for both Forbidden Door and the G1 I'd like to suggest a few more Forbidden Door type events, to keep the excitement going all year long: An event where they go to the UK and AEW wrestlers fight local stars, One where they book an arena but it slips their mind and they have to scramble at the last minute to fill the card with whoever is available, One where the lights dim and JR talks for a few hours about how he has a bad feeling about what is going to happen One where the wrestlers hug it out and agree to let bygones be bygones, A one-night tournament where the winner gets half of Tony Khan's allowance, And these ones need a little more work, but Four Hidden Doors, where behind one of them is a hungry tiger; and the Foretold Door where they announce the winners during the build up, and a show that's a command performance for the current POTUS, but I'm not sure what we'd call that one. (Edit: Maybe "The Show For Joe").

I kind of want to poke fun at JR for being unable to pronounce "Vikingo" but I am being honest, I also mispronounce that name in my head every time I read it. If the match had a story it was a very basic one. Something like: See Spot. See Spot. See Spot... But for sure those spots were entertaining. I'm not trying to act like I didn't enjoy it. Action vs ZSJ was exactly the (underdog with) speed vs technique battle we were all expecting. ZSJ is right up there among the best and most interesting pro wrestlers in the world now. It's always fun to see how different guys try to solve the puzzle that he presents. If I were to offer a word of advice to young Action, it would be: Maybe, when your left arm is being worked over like that, grab the arm and grimace once in a while, maybe show that it's painful to use the arm, even when you are on offence. Stuff like that will impress people who are playing close attention, and if you do a good job of it we'll start saying you're a really good pro wrestler. My only issue with Emi vs Willow was that too much of the stiffness and violence was in picture in picture or lost entirely during commercial. I completely enjoyed everything we got to see of both of the last two matches. That was some darn fine pro wrestling. Moriarty and Shibata matched up really well, in my opinion. ZSJ vs Rocky is up for free on YouTube right now, by the way. NJPW Strong channel, I believe. Hopefully that's available everywhere. Edit: Here you go:

Frank Sinatra once sang, "Do be do be do, do do be do be, do be do be do, do do be do be, do be do be do, do do do do be do"

So, what is in the soup? When I was living in (North) Vancouver, the best local Mexican restaurant had an amazing beer and cheddar soup. I could have housed a gallon of that. Maybe. And, just in case you (or, really, anyone) actually didn't get my hilarious comedy joke:

(Steve) Austin? (Jim) Powers?

At this point?!?!

This is pertmuch exactly my kind of show. I love it when AEW give us something like this. Just good to great, fun, interesting pro wrestling match-ups with a ton of variety. AAA Mega Heavyweight Champion El Hijo del Vikingo defends vs. Dralistico vs.Komander Very likely to be the really, really good and exciting kind of spot fest. I had long been waiting and hoping for Vikingo to show up in AEW and he has NOT disappointed in the least. It's almost as fun seeing everyone else mark out for him as it is watching him. And it ain't exactly like Komander and Dralistico are chopped liver. It would be enough for this to be merely spectacular, but there is a real chance that they'll give us some kind of little story as well. Like if Vai, Yngwie, and Satriani were jamming and decided to play Cause We've Ended as Lovers with intense emotion (while also outdoing each other pyrotechnically). NJPW World Television Champion Zack Sabre Jr. defends against Action Andretti. I totally agree with Matt here. This very much has the feel of a flashy young gun being put into a situation where we will all learn something about him. If he can hang, technically, with ZSJ then I feel like he's gonna earn some respect. Likening it to a young wrestler being thrown in there with Regal (or Finlay) seems really apt. I'm pulling for the kid to put up a good showing. Ring of Honour Pure Champion Katsuyori Shibata defends against Lee Moriarty.I It weirds me out to think that Shibata vs Orange was over half a year ago, and the G1 grappling match with ZSJ was over a year prior to that! Time f'n flies. Like always, I'm on tenterhooks. I love watching Shibata fight but I'll never not be scared. Unlike Andretti, I don't feel like Tiga Style has anything to prove. i feel like this is more a chance for him to shine. Just. PLEASE. Don't headbutt Shibata. NJPW Strong Women's Champion Willow Nightingale defends against Emi Sakura. Oh. Hell. Yeah. If I were booking, this would be the main event. Possibly, I am higher on Emi than many of you. I think we are all equally high on Willow, and rightly so. I can't help but wish that our dearly missed old friend could be watching and commenting on this one with us. Though, I can guess what he would likely say.

I really appreciate all the feedback, and agree it's great that several of us are able to appreciate that 1) it's probably for the best if we don't get *exactly* what we want all the time and 2) sometimes our preconceptions are wrong. Looking back at my post, I kind of over-emphasised the "WWE stink" in my explanations of who does and who doesn't make my personal hypothetical AEW roster. To be clear, though, my thought process was NOT "let's construct an AEW with zero.of that WWE stink" but rather let's construct a roster that's "all indie wrestlers and friends" (and Japanese wrestlers and luchadores). The aspect that I emphasised more in my mind than in the post was "friends." That goes all the way back to the first navel-gazing thread (the creative freedom and individual expression one) where I spent several posts gleefully and fruitlessly trying to explain why AEW hiring Doctor Luther was a Very Good Thing. I have the very un-McMahonian trait of placing a high value on the mental, emotional (and physical) well-being of the professional wrestlers whom I enjoy watching. I want them to be happy. I want the locker room to be Camelot. (it's based on my experiences in the Vancouver territory in the 1980s, where even if we didn't all get along all the time we ALWAYS had each other's backs, and on being invited into the Osaka Pro FAMILY after I moved here in 2009. A lot of my closest friends and favourite people came out of my involvement with Vancouver All Star and Oasaka Pro, and I wish that for every pro wrestler who might desire it. And I abhor the idea that your boss can tell you that you're no longer going on the road with your best friend(s) or significant other(s) and there was a time when AEW *seemed* to be embracing the principles of basic human kindness and friendship and sharing etc etc in that respect. (And I remain baffled that some people *really* don't find value in that and think the only possible way to run a locker room is to hire stars and make the most possible money and be number one at any cost, and to hear the lamentations of the women. HAVE WE LEARNED NOTHING FROM SEASON ONE OF TED LASSO?!?!)) *deep breath* That. PLUS reduce the WWE stink. Our Starting Point is Kenny, the Bucks, and Cody. Because that's where it started. (And also, like, SoCal Unsensored and Hangman and The Lucha Bros). Then we add friends with indie cred and wrestlers from Japan and Mexico who fit the aesthetic and the happy happy joy joy locker room culture. So the big one is that we bring in Bryan, who is a genuinely great guy. But we NEVER consider bringing in Punk, who has a reputation of being a self-centred asshole behind the scenes. (I have met Bryan several times, and he 100% lives up to the wildest possible expectations of "being a great guy." I have never met Phil from Chicago but I have friends and friends-of-friends who know him and the general consensus is less than positive. I have a close friend in Japan who *despises* him, who was furious when he was brought into AEW - he feels the same way as I do about locker-room culture and was sure Punk would poison the water in AEW - and he absolutely bathed in bitter schadenfreude when he turned out to be correct). So you never bring him in and you miss out on those AWESOME (in the actual literal sense) crowd reactions in Chicago etc etc... But human relations are extremely complex. There must be someone out there who dislikes Bryan Danielson. Hell, there are people who dislike ME. And certainly there are people who really like Punk/Phil. Plenty of them. So I was kind of assuming (not knowing any of the involved parties personally) that if we never hire Punk we maybe also lose out on Joe and FTR. Or maybe they only pop by for one-offs. And it's in many ways a HUGE loss. Hopefully there is no need to go over what I feel AEW might have gained in exchange. Addition by subtraction,in locker room terms. AxB, Porky, John, and John: Did you guys really believe that I don't know Joe is an ROH guy? C'mon man! Or, to put it more politely: I agree that Samoa Joe does not carry "the WWE stink" on him. Or, to make a joke out of it: I actually think of Joe as a NOAH guy (since I have only ever seen him (and Low Ki and Scorp...) live in a NOAH ring). As far as Mox is concerned, my thinking was more that, as likeable and charming as Renee obviously is, I personally am perhaps overconcerned with avoiding WWE elements in how I'd want "my" dream version of AEW, uh, presented. So no Renee. Hence, maybe, no Mox. Also,obviously, a HUGE loss. I very much like the idea, however, that Mox is not and never was a WWE guy because that was Dean Ambrose. Nice! The other thing I have been navel-gazing about is that we have close to zero idea what kind of pressure the network people are putting on our lad Coach Tony. I kind of imagine a room full of coked-out TV idiots with no clue demanding that Sting and Jake the Snake and Zack Clayton and Shaq be featured and by sheer chance occasionally being right. But who knows? Certainly not me. I often wonder if the network mandated "only one women's match per show!" Certainly I have read the rumours that the network suits demanded that JR be part of the presentation. And I don't blame JR at all if he is in fact advocating for AEW to be more old school and more mainstream. We all want what we want. JR has a massive wealth of knowledge and experience about the wrestling business. But: Axl Rose has a massive wealth of knowledge and experience about the music business but I don't think I'd want him in a position of influence with, say, Radiohead. (To continue clarifying: GNR were great at what they did, but I don't think every band should therefore copy what they did. Radiohead are not necessarily better, but the thing they are good at doing is in certain respects *different* and it might have been a mistake if someone had forced Thom to wear a do-rag and tie scarves to his mic stand, or whatever, because that's what they were used to seeing). I think AEW has kind of outgrown what I personally would most prefer it to be. Perhaps, in a late-stage capitalist world that's all but inevitable. Damn near everything successful above a certain threshold has to, eventually, turn into a soulless corporate monster. There's still more than enough enjoyment to be had and some interesting developments to look forward to. Also: The videogame looks like an insane amount of fun. That could be huge. Here Comes the Pain was a big part of my second-to-last real burst of WWE fandom. (The last being the brief peak of the YES! movement, the run from the Rumble through to the RAW after WM XXX).

I have been thinking too much (as is my habit) about what it is that I (personally) want(ed) out of AEW. And I think it's: an easily available, reasonably well-produced, English language pro wrestling show that has the sense of community, the sense of humour, and the sense of creative freedom and experimentation that you get with the weirdest little indies, and that also distinguishes itself * as much as possible * from current North American corporate-style pro wrestling and also does most if not all of the storytelling in the ring and has mostly clean finishes (so in that respect not unlike 70s through 90s All Japan, for example). And I really did get something very much like that for close to three years. You may recall how much I enjoyed that and how vociferously I defended it from folks that I perceived to be demanding that AEW behave more like the TV wrestling they grew up on and/or become more homogenized, corporate, and/or slick. Anyway, I kind of got to wondering, "What if I had been helping run AEW and completely got my way, and it was all indie wrestlers and friends and Japanese wrestlers and luchadores and AEW didn't bring in a bunch of ex-WWE and NXT wrestlers and didn't go after giants and musclemen and blonde Amazon ladies with massive boobs and reality TV personalities and ex-MMA people unless they pretty clearly fit in with the whole Indies/Japan/Lucha/Friends aesthetic? And also if the Attitude Era/ECW worship and gimmick match overkill was turned down a few notches." How different would AEW be? What would we be missing out on? There would be no Big Paul or Mark Henry. A clear loss, there. Both of then are fun and charming in smallish doses. No JR. Sorry. But: A massive positive. He definitely takes more off the table than he brings to the table, these days. Possibly without JR,there would be no TV deal and AEW would never get off the ground. That would be a problem. On the other hand, I imagine he is one of the loudest voices demanding that AEW tone down the weirdness and behave more like the wrestling he remembers from x number of years ago. So, AEW without JR but with TV might be WAY more to my personal taste. Dude is a legend, though. Second best ever to do it. I think you keep Jericho and Danielson because they have that "travelled the world perfecting their craft" thing going for them. Outweighs the WWE connection in my book. So you can have them working commentary with Ex sometimes. I think maybe Nigel could get a full time commentary gig, if he wanted one. I think you lose Renee and Mox, and those are obviously huge losses in so many ways. Mox has massive indie cred, but maybe the WWE connection outweighs it? I'm willing to hear arguments to the contrary. So obviously the whole presentation is going to be massively different. Rougher, but not necessarily worse. I don't think Britt and MJF get pushed as much in my imaginary version of AEW. We put less value on polished and professional mic and character work. Maybe you don't invest the same amount of time and energy on Jade. Everyone's mileage is going to vary on whether that's for the better or the worse. You never bring Punk in. Hangman, Kenny, Jericho, Danielson, Eddie Kingston, and Cody are in the title scene to start out. Maybe Cody doesn't have to pull himself out of contention. Does Cody leave, in this scenario? If he wants to. In this scenario, AEW is Camelot. Once you finish milking every drop out of Young Bucks vs Lucha Bros, Fenix gets elevated to world title contention. Maybe MiSu and Ishii get shots. Maybe you do more with CIMA early on. Eventually Sammy, Hobbs, Swerve, Darby etc etc get to climb that proverbial (not literal) ladder. Orange still develops into one of the very best in the world. Speaking of Hobbs, he's a big guy who gets signed. His arrival in AEW was pretty organic. I could see that happening again in this scenario. Lance Archer is the in-house giant who plays the Kane role. Wardlow gets the chance to work his way up the ladder and doesn't get derailed by MJF this time. You don't bring in Billy Gun, Big Bill, Hagar, or Satnam, and you never realise what you are missing out on. Bear Country and Gates of Agony get to be big guys with a push. Not sure where you slot Brian Cage in this scenario. You probably don't bring in Samoa Joe. Maybe you can get away with bringing in Claudio, though, and he can quickly work his way into contention. Not sure if you just buy ROH's back catalogue or if you make it a completely separate thing. If the latter, that's where Joe and Claudio go. Mark Briscoe, too. If no active ROH then Claudio and Briscoe join the crowded title scene. You never bring in Adam Cole, Andrade, Ogogo, Miro, Jarrett, Kingdom, Zack Clayton, or Tony Nese. You probably feel, incorrectly, that the show is WAY worse off without them. (In many cases it is worse off, but not by THAT much). Workhorsemen, Dark Order, Sonny Kiss, Best Friends, Butcher & Blade, Fuego, Keith Lee, Comoroto, Rush, Bandido, Kommander, Takeshita, Angelico, Tiga Style, and others get more space to shine in. You don't bring in Malakai which sounds bad, but instead Buddy and King get to shine without the spooky bullshit, maybe? We completely miss out on FTR in AEW. Which is maybe the worst thing about this scenario. Also, no Tazz means no Hook. If you wanna bend the rules to let Tazz, Hook, Dax, and Cash in it would make everything better. Probably no Christian. That would be harder on others than on me, personally. Acclaimed, Aussie Open, Bear Country, Best Friends, Buddy & King, Butcher & Blade, Dustin & Lee, Gates of Agony, Private Party, Young Bucks, and various Lucha and Puro teams are constantly featured. Tag wrestling is a huge priority and the tag title matches can headline a PPV. In the women's division, hopefully we can sometimes have more than one match on a TV show. No Storm definitely hurts. But no Saraya, hence no lousy WWE lite storyline, perhaps balances that out. Even without Storm, you can build a hard-hitting division around Emi, Athena, Hayter, Shida, Stat, Legit Leyla, Mercedes Martinez, Nyla, Penelope, Bunny, Willow, Magical Girl, Velvet, Hogan, Billie, Skye Blue etc etc etc. Willow would get the chance to be on top here. You'd see more of Abadon. I think you miss out on Ruby, and also don't bring in Madison or Taya. Possible PPV card: World Title: Danielson vs Eddie Kingston Women's Title: Willow vs Mercedes Martinez Tag Titles: Shida & Stat vs Emi & Athena Tag Titles: Best Friends vs Ingobernables Secondary Title: Orange vs Swerve Secondary Title: Billie Starkz vs Nyla Trios: Young Bucks & Kenny vs Hangman, Silver & Reynolds Grudge match: Hobbs vs Bear Boulder Tag contenders match: Aussie Open vs Komander & Bandido Opener: Lee Moriarty vs Angelico vs Sonny Kiss vs Fenix I mean: I would be pretty happy with that! Would it fill an arena? The other absolute worst thing would be missing out on Brody Lee. Maybe I'd prefer not to have my way, after all, if it means losing out on that.

Yep. I was all about the DOOM AND GLOOM but now I'm all about the NEVER ASSUME. Let the good times resume. I presume. Turns out prowrestling is still the focus. That Rampage. Love EVERYTHING about that. Darn near brings a tear to ole Gordlow's eye. What a molten crowd tonight! It makes SUCH a difference. THROW WIDE THE GATES OF AGONY! It was kind of funny when they cut to the crowd while Don was trying to speak and there were dudes in Bullet Club t-shirts vociferously booing the bad guys. (Because in my opinion Bullet Club are a "heel faction"). I will certainly watch the first couple of episodes of The Punk Show out of (morbid?) curiosity but I actually kind of hope it will turn out to be for-me-personally skippable. Partly (mainly?) because Saturday there is Sunday here and Sunday is when Papa Gordlow plays with his daughters (who are otherwise too busy with school, cram school, ballet, piano, calligraphy...) So my purely selfish hope is that they feature Punk constantly and Casey et al. just love it and are so happy but also they make JR permanent lead announcer exclusive to Collision and also move Jarrett and Saraya there but FTR still wrestle on Dynamite and Rampage etc etc... (Also Juice cuts promos on Collision but throws punches on Rampage and Dynamite). Kind of curious what everyone else's secret selfish wishes are for The Punk Show Brand Split and Draft Spectacular. Like, maybe Matt wants Hangman and Takeshita moved somewhere exclusively, where, say, Dustin never goes, Drew would most likely prefer at least one show with zero Matt Nick Cole participation, Natural might watch more of whichever show Penta and Sammy don't appear on, and Andy from Kansas would like Cody to be able to cross over...? I wonder if it is POSSIBLE to book three shows so that each and every one of us can see all of our favourites on two of them and have one show that's skippable-for-us-personally. Probably not. Personal tastes are not that logical. Anyway, I am mostly back to being a frothing-at-the-mouth fanboy for at least a couple more days. Feels nice. What a show!

OK. So far that's FIVE (5) matches announced (mixed tag, BCC trios, Stat vs Nyla, GATES OF F'N AGONY, & random as hell 3-way) vs FOUR (4) talky bits (Tony announces something, hear from Takeshita, what's up with Friedman, and hear from White Juice). In my opinion 5 > 4, so Actual Wrestling (Actual Exciting Wrestling? Actually Entertaining Wrestling? Altogether Excellent Wrestling?) lives to see another day. Also Natural's Dad's birthday has been saved. And my heart just grew three sizes * Well played, AEW, well played. *note: The announcement of a brand split and a draft may cause Gordlow's heart to shrink by a factor of >3. Right there with Log on that one. Trying. Trying REAL HARD to be cautiously optimistic on that front.