Gordlow

Special Whole-Buncha-Gordlow's-Favourites Edition of Elevation Write-up Legit way more stoked for this than I was for RAMPAGE Higane Shinno is from Ehime! I have been to Ehime several times, as my mother-in-law is from the neighbouring prefecture. I love Ehime! I think even most gaijin who live in Japan never make it out there. The small city of Matsuyama is in my top 5 or 10 places in Japan. The onsen there looks just like the one from Spirited Away. i was gonna say "Too bad Nicky Boy's gonna kill him" but then AEW gave us the SHOCKING UPSET (spoiler). Hot damn! I wonder who will team with Shinno vs Nicky Boy & Solo. Maybe Lard Lad?!?! Comoroto, like Hobbs, somehow seems to keep getting MORE jacked. Unreal. LOVE the ending to that match! I generally enjoy Nyla more as a Twitter personality than as a wrestler, but Shafir tying ladies in knots and Nyla subsequently crushing them really works as a tag team deal. Plus they are building an intriguing "Disinterested Vickie" storyline here, too! LOVE Kittie LeFleur's Old School look! Kiera Hogan looks great in there, in both senses, but I was hoping she'd work more as a face and play to the crowd a bit, now that she's an ex-baddie. Outrunners also have a great old-school look and style! I am intrigued by the Indianapolis Indie Scene. Is this a thing there? I like it! Outrunners vs FTR, please! Maybe next time AEW hits Indiana. Top Flight gets a big crowd chant right away, then goes out and EARNS it. The Ethan/Matt/PP story they are telling here is pretty great. I love YouTube-exclusive stories. Way to reward the really hardcore fans, AEW! If they put Madison over Emi, I riot! We Will Chop You gets more over with the crowd every week. Sadly, they didn't pop for Tea Time this week. Tigastyle! Sir Pentico!! Jacked Up Luther!!! Big Cass. Will Luther and Cass get into it on the outside? Sadly, no. Big Paul adds some frisson to the match by saying Serp is 99-0 in AEW. Even heel announcer Matt Menard excitedly pulls for the underdog here. To no avail. (spoiler). I am enjoying ALL OF THIS so very much. Then we get GATES OF AGONY & Brian Cage. Local Guy Dan Adams, who wears glasses and dad shorts, is a huge crowd favourite. Awesome. Cage catching Neon Ninja in vertical suplex position is totally sick! YES! Dalton & The Boys come out to challenge the hoss team! Team Castle representing 2020s style wrestling. Cage & GoA representing 1990s hoss style! Oh boy oh boy oh boy! Presumably on the ROH PPV. Great addition! Reynolds vs Kip! Another fun YouTube-exclusive minifeud! Announcers do a great job of explaining it without over-explaining. And you can feel the hatred in the ring. TAKESHITA gets the YouTube main event! And Nicky Boy comes out with Solo! Oh baby! Takeshita & Shinno vs The Factory! Give it me! Takeshita gets a MASSIVE POP and they are maybe doing an Elite Recruits Lard Lad Story! That was GREAT! Thank you, DEAN, for the heads up. Also, w/r/t Ehime. Their mandarin oranges are famously delicious. They make a special orange juice there named Pon Juice. If you go to a convenience store in Matsuyama you can buy Pon Juice flavoured EVERYTHING. Pon Juice flavoured Pocky, chewing gum, hard candies, gummy candies, etc etc etc. I recommend treating that stuff like Takeshita treats Cinnabon. Also try the grilled fish cakes called jakoten.

And, if I remember correctly, that was the end of WWE. So, once again, we are forced to admit that the doomsayers are making a great point. Also, let's remember the story of the boy who cried "Wolf!" As I recall, the boy kept yelling that there was a wolf among the sheep or goats and disaster was immanent and everyone came running and he got to be the centre of attention for a while and everyone was happy and said, "Gee whiz, boy who keeps crying wolf even though there is no wolf, you sure are smart and cool." And everybody liked him and we all learned something . So there's that as well.

I don't actually want them to be this super-mean and petty, but it would be funny if they gave him a finisher that was a badly blown buckshot lariat. I've said it before and I'll say it again: All I really want out of an AEW wrestling game is to have the five basic B-button moves be a puch or chop, a kick, a collar-and-elbow tie-up, an Irish whip, and a Canadian destroyer.

@DEAN Hey, DEAN! I am peer pressuring you! EDIT: might as well get this out of the way now: NO "GREAT" MATCHES FOR ME, PLEASE! No ***** Meltzer/Keith-style epics that go long, have tons of (empty) flash and multiple finisher kick-outs. I have seen too much of that. I am here for interesting/weird matches. I love Kenny. I love Okada. I loved Kenny vs Okada at Dominion. I DO NOT WANNA WATCH THAT KIND OF MATCH HERE. I wanna watch Kenny vs Little Girl. Gimme weird. Gimme crazy. Gimme violent. Please don't gimme self-consciously epic and flashy. Also do not give me Sports Entertainment. No WWE. WWWF is fine, if it's weird and/or involves Andre. Also, unless you specifically ask, I won't be giving out great matches, but rather weird or interesting or nostalgic ones.

The segment was very clearly meant to set up a tag match. The whole point of it was Taylor telling Lee he needs to find a partner followed by Swerve showing up after Taylor walked away. I wasn't sure whether to be excited about the match until both Matt and DEAN vouched for Taylor and then I got excited for it. And then I watched about 30 seconds from the middle of the video DEAN posted and it was just Taylor LAYIING IN a couple of huge forearms on BK... And now I am fully stoked for Taylor & Griffey vs Swerve & Lee, which will include some serious BMMSM action. Plus strange style. Plus, for those who prefer matches to have a storyline that isn't only concerned with who will win and who will lose and how, we also get some "Can Keith trust Swerve" dramatic tension, plus the frisson of a possible full turn where Swerve maybe turns on Lee and joins Taylor's group... Or maybe Swerve regains Limitless's confidence and trust. I think it was more than sufficiently set up by the interview segment, and by all the stuff that's gine down, erswhile, between Lee and Strickland. Mainly, though, BMMSM coming up! Hopefully Taylor sticks around. Also, speaking of BMMSM I would very much like AEW to bring in Calvin Tankman, team him with Powerhouse Hobbs, and not call them Calvin & Hobbs. Maybe Tankerhouse or Powertank. Then feud them with Orange and Juice teaming under a name that also doesn't make a pun. It would be the all time peak Arnie in the sky pro wrestling moment.

Interesting (and challenging) question, twiztor. AEW is pretty good at heating up and building up dudes with talent. I think a lot of people maybe didn't think Hangman was on Jericho's level three years ago but he's up there as a top guy now. MJF started out as Cody's understudy. The Acclaimed and Orange were unknown to me three years ago but now make perfect sense as championship title holders. The talent is obviously there already, if we are specifically looking for, uh, a racially diverse group of dudes good enough to get that level of push. For example: I'd imagine you could heat Limitless up to that level in six months to a year if you needed to. Maybe faster. Swerve or Hobbs don't feel all that far off to me, either. Maybe Darius or one of The Acclaimed a couple of years down the road if they can stay healthy? Also: I think anyone who's listened to enough Nofx (like, say, me) might be inclined to consider MJF AEW's first non-white mens world champion. EDIT: Based on, like, 30 seconds of him LAYING IT IN that I watched, Shane Taylor has eventual champ potential! W/R/T the fantasy booking. It's been a couple of weeks. I was hoping more people might play. I did mine as a basic thought experiment in this way: thought of all the healthy available AEW wrestlers I would like to watch in PPV matches and try to cram them all in plus some of my friends and personal favourites and a couple of other interesting outsiders. I ended up with an overlong and overcrowded show and also forgot Hook, Starks, and others. I didn't wanna cheat by checking the AEW roster page. Should have. But couldn't have possibly crammed everyone in without cutting my friends and personal favourites from the show. And even then it would have been obviously overstuffed. I believe it would have been a lot of really good wrestling. But also A LOT of wrestling. I think John from Cincinnati put together a MUCH better card than I did. I would happily pay to watch that exact card. He even fit in a couple of interesting outsiders without overloading the card. I think he approached it from a different, more logical angle. My main takeaway going forward is to maybe have a little more sympathy for the booker in terms of: maybe understanding a bit more why the PPVs go so long while also not including everyone I want to see. And also why even with a lot of belts it is not possible everyone I like (or find deserving) to hold or even contend for one at any given time. And reinforcing that for me at least it's realistic to want to have friends around. It would, I have to imagine, be really challenging to find the balance point where you are running a successful business while keeping it as much a labour of love as possible. It also underlines what an absolute motherload of talent that roster is. I think it's a worthwhile thought experiment and also a fun kind of mental masturbation. I'd encourage more folks to give it a shot.

Darby, Athena, and Orange all had foregone conclusion matches that were fun to watch in different ways. Cole Karter has good smarmy heel charisma and Darby sold a ton for him, Athena got to do her new "unprofessional" gimmick on Rampage, and Orange vs QT made fun use of the lumberjack stipulation. Juice vs Orange. OK. I kinda hope Juice sticks around so he can team with Orange and they "Arnie in the sky" it by calling them "Cassidy and Robinson." Shida gonna defend the WAVE title in AEW! Yeah! Uh. I guess I liked Satnam's suit. Heck of a job by his tailor.

NIFTY YOUNG MEN VERSUS THE FACTORY SPECTACULAR EDITION OF RAMPAGE!! Orangey Boy Cassidy vs Cutie Marshall: a nonchalantly agreed upon lumberjack match! To see who rules the Atlantic. Darby Allin vs Cole Carter: I want to say that if Bryan vs Bald doesn't win DEAN's Poll this week, I will eat a hat. But. I would have said that about Kingston vs Akiyama last week. So who knows? Anyway, both of the AEW Nifty Guys vs Factory Stooges matches have massive sleeper potential. Athena vs Former Ohio Valley Wrestling Women's Champion "Dynamite" Dani Mo. I am gonna go way out on a limb and predict an Athena win here. Hopefully she continues her YouTube tradition of "being" unprofessionally violent in the ring. It's really fun when she does that! Plus fucking Jeff Jarrett in the fucking ring again and fucking Saraya on the mic again. Will either of them win me over? I suppose there's a non-zero chance. I think it is more likely that Danielson vs Harwood gets zero votes this week than that I enjoy those particular segments. Still very very likely I will enjoy the show as a whole, though. It's also possible, perhaps even likely, that Elevation will be Gordlow's favourite pro wrestling show next week. While this edition of Rampage is, like, 60% aimed at my sweet spot (on paper), Elevation is pertmuch 100% Gordlownip. Can't wait!

Oh yeah. The Burberry Belt. It's no American Dragon Hemp Belt but it suits his character. And I forgot the main event! I was reminded that I got to see PAC in Dragon Gate in a small arena near Fukuoka a decade and a half ago. The DG influence on these matches is pretty clear. I am happy about that. These guys are kind of like Mahavishnu Orchestra or Weather Report or something... In that it really is a little too much but if you are that gifted and hard-working and also have that kind of chemistry then... It's not WHY I watch AEW but I enjoy it. I enjoy the hell out of it. Like an ice cream bar or crepe station at the buffet.

My big takeaway from this show is that for me, personally, Orange Cassidy's promo with QT was a million times more effective than MJF's epic "look at me cutting a heel promo here" heel promo. (Though, I do like that he set up possible programs with Kingston and Danielson - though, I will be bummed when he cheats to beat them). Same deal with him decking Regal. I do not dig fake injury angles. At all. And it makes Regal look like an idiot. But, at least it adds heat to the eventual Danielson match. Which will be great until the bummer ending. And speaking of long discursive workyshooty promos that are just not my cup of tea at all... Hey! It's Jade! Anyway, enough about the stuff that is not my cup of tea. Lotsa folks apparently love that stuff. Hope they enjoyed the heaping helping of it we got today. Sincerely. Joe vs AR is exactly the kind of thing I watch AEW to see. Established ex-indie greats vs up n comers. Or sub in a Japanese wrestler on either side of that equation. And obviously Bryan vs Dax. Good Lord! What a match. Why are they fighting? Because they are both great at fighting and they want to see who is better, because Dax wants to test himself, because Bryan doesn't back down from a challenge. More than good enough reason for me. Personally. Willow is why I watch AEW. Didn't have a clue she existed all that long ago. now I am delighted when she gets a win. I personally would like as much of that as possible. Certainly, we got a sufficient dose of it today. And Orange won promo of the night by a mile.

It's like waking up on Christmas morning. I know I'm gonna get something good, but I don't know what it will be... Then it turns out to be something I never asked for but also something I really wanted!

I figure if you're only gonna announce three matches for a two-hour pro wrestling TV show, it's probably best if all three of those matches feel like they might be pretty great. Like, say: Willow Nightingale vs Anna Jay AS, Bryan Danielson vs Dax the Ax, and Death Triangle vs Wayward Sons Part 3 of 7. I mean, I am gonna watch regardless as are most of us here, but way to get me maximally stoked with minimal information, AEW. Off to sleep soon, maybe they'll have announced more matches by the time I wake up. Maybe we'll get a nice surprise or two. I'm almost afraid to ask for anything specific (Like, say, JD Drake vs Sting or a Maki Itoh appearance). Just looking forward to: 1) Good wrestling and 2) Pleasant surprises.

I can hardly believe that it's possible another match beat out Kingston vs Akiyama. In the same week. In the same company. I was so sure that I'd be voting for Kingston vs Akiyama this week that I felt just fine about not voting for Kingston & Ortiz vs Akiyama & Takeshita last week. I think that if we include Kingston's post-match talk then it's unbeatable. Cannot be topped. But here we are.

Rampage was on at 6 am my time. I was not planning to watch it live but I woke up at 5:56 because I had to take a whiz. Good timing, my bladder. So, might as well, what the hey, YOLO, I stayed up and watched it live while chatting with my buddy Kyle, who lives in Canada or America or somewhere weird like that, and from whom I will steal a joke in this post. I agree with all of DEAN's takes on the show. I know this because I went right back to sleep pretty much as soon as the show ended. So, I was able to read his thoughts before posting mine, rather than typing simultaneously. I think Dante Martin is at least part mountain goat. Because he likes to sing about Chavo Sr. I owe my bladder one. FTR vs Top Flight was TOO MUCH FUN. Exactly what you'd hope for. Speed and athleticism vs savvy, toughness, and teamwork. LOVED the hyuge bandaids on Jericho's chest! HATED some random A-hole trying to start a WHAT chant in 2022, as Craig H pointed out in his ROAD REPORT. I am bewildered by the guy he described who presumably paid for tickets, parking, etc etc to sit in the arena and loudly complain I wonder if he's bragging about it on social media somewhere or whatever. Maybe Toni Storm will get Broken Face as her new theme song. We know Tony K likes The Pixies. YEAH! JD DRAKE ON TV! I hope this leads to Drake vs Sting and also a tag match. DARBY has great ring chemistry with Henry, like he does with B. King. Athena has to build some evil-looking wings now. YEAH! SHIDA ON TV! And vs AMINATA, too! Hooray! Dark Order gets a main event! Will the announcers act surprised when 10 turns? Yes, they will! Perfect use of -1 there. Butcher, Blade, Bunny, Bull, & Bad Friend. Now that 10 has turned, presumably he will go by from now on. BRYAN VS DAX! HEY NATURAL! BRYAN VS DAX!! Oh, baby! Edit: I got a screen cap of Uno unmasked: