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Hooker

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Everything posted by Hooker

  1. It's a really mixed message to have insincere heel Bliss do this in the same format as her "Nia once slapped food out of someone's hands and then picked it up and ate it" series of fat-shaming clips.
  2. Somebody Should Do Something! with Michael Cole
  3. Didn't you see Kurt after their match? He did.
  4. Is that five years at $300k per year, or $300k over the five years ($60k per)? Because $60k a year, as an independent contractor, that has to pay for their own travel when they travel 100-200 times a year, all hotels, all meals, and whatever the insane health insurance premiums a professional wrestler has to cover, is some fuckin' bullshit right there.
  5. I was running on entertainment fumes from the Monday Night Wars until 2003. I was getting progressively more and more exhausted and fed up with the show, but felt that I had watched for this long and I probably should just keep it going. Then, literally the moment Hogan came out as Mr. America, I turned the TV off and stopped watching WWE outside of individual matches I heard were good until 2009, which I only started watching again at that point because of how awful it is and I have some friends I do Mystery Science Theater 3000-style viewings of bad movies and the WWE shows fit into that quite well. I probably still wouldn't be watching to this day otherwise.
  6. Are you sure? Did the woman have a Russian accent?
  7. If you don't know that wrestling fans are basically dogs that go to the extremes of OMG BEST EVER or BARK GROWL HATE THIS on everything, then yes, you don't understand wrestling any more.
  8. In a backstage segment, he (pretended) to be on the phone, and quickly said something to the effect of, "Hi, mom. Yeah, I lost again, but it's okay. I tried really hard." I'm not defending Ziggler, but let's be fair. He's said the funniest thing on RAW in the last decade.
  9. Here's an opinion nobody is going to agree with me on: Renee is obviously better than Coachman. But you never knew what idiotic shit Coachman was going to say. You know exactly what Renee is going to say. I think the unpredictability of Coachman (and again, to be clear: he's unpredictable because he's a Goddamn idiot) is more valuable than the serviceable, anodyne Renee on a show that is infamously known for being predictable already.
  10. While you're absolutely correct, you realize that the ability to "drag this out" isn't a laudable ability, right?
  11. We've been absent of Randy Orton for a couple months now. How much more pumped are you for his return now compared to when he went out? Absence isn't going to heal Reigns. Reigns has been rejected by the fans at a level that is totally without precedent in professional wrestling. Roman Reigns is going to have to be completely re-invented if he has any chance of success at this point.
  12. It's so weird that he frames that as "cutting down" since, at the beginning of November last year, the schedule through Mania was: Nov 20: Survivor Series Dec 4: TLC Dec 18: Roadblock (does this count?) Jan 29: Rumble Feb 12: Elimination Chamber March 5: Fastlane April 2: Mania So, they cut a grand total of one show, and that's only if you consider Roadblock a dyed in the wool PPV.
  13. There's actually two awful parts of this: the connection, and then him falling unprotected head first on the mat: Anyway, off to the main event!
  14. I would like to talk about Lesnar / Goldberg from a narrative perspective. At Survivor Series, Goldberg shocked an overconfident Lesnar. At that point, it could be a fluke. Then, in the Rumble, Goldberg shocked him again. At this point, the story is going fine. A flaw has been exposed in a dominate force and it can no longer be considered a fluke. However, at in this match, Lesnar changed nothing. He wrestled the same match he always does, absorbed all the same punishment as before without having any answer for it, and just overcame it. The character learned nothing and didn't have to grow at all. It is an incredibly pointless and nihilistic story. It's the story of someone failing their driving test twice and then, doing no studying and changing nothing about how they approach it, take the test a third time and manage to pass it. Who could care?
  15. If you're going to pick one thing to not shut up about, not actually hurting your opponent is a good one. It is literally the whole point of professional wrestling.
  16. Ha ha. Her defense is that a doctor thinks she's retarded.
  17. Just to recap: Smackdown main event faces: Cena, Ambrose, Orton RAW main event faces: Reigns RAW is three hours long Monday Night Football starts in eight weeks
  18. I don't want to live in a world where we have to doubt that someone who looks like Brock Lesnar got that way without the use of performance enhancing drugs.
  19. I think the problem is that the fans (or, to put in a better perspective, let's say customers) like certain things and don't like other things, and they would rather have more of the thing they like and less of the thing they don't like. Now, Roman may be green eggs and ham and if people would just try it they'll find they like it (I don't think that's the case, and they've had to eat green eggs and ham for two years now and never come around on it, so, really...). But nobody is under the impression this is a real sport any more. That time is so far gone and so completely dead and decomposed and beyond the point of identifying the body at this point. So while Alex Rodriguez or LeBron James or Floyd Mayweather may be supremely unlikable people, they're going to be on top because there isn't anyone better than them. That is not the case in the world of fiction! Everyone knows there's no reason Roman has to be on top. I think the only way for Roman to be salvaged is put him in midcard stuff and keep him there until he wins the crowd over. If he can't do it in the midcard, he certainly isn't going to do it in the main event.
  20. Well, as someone that hates Reigns, the idea of pushing him as an invincible brooding badass who kills everyone sounds like hot garbage. It also sounds like the exact hot garbage we're already getting. So I'm very skeptical your idea will work.
  21. Yeah, this. Every now and then, someone on here suggests, "You know what would work for Roman? Pushing him harder." I'm always flabberghasted. How many times do you need to see that not work before you realize it won't work? The last five times we threw gasoline on the fire, it only made things worse, but I've got a really good feeling about time number six.
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