Burgundy LaRue

Arenas and Rashard Lewis need not complain about too much ever again. Dudes' grandchildren will be provided for thanks to those insane contracts.

Good graces, man. Is your blood nothing but sugar water? 40-50 bug bites? They're out to convert you. Don't become The Fly! (only half joking--all those bites, yikes!)

Has that ever stopped a lawsuit?

I watched the movie after you mentioned it on the 3.0 board, and noooooo. . . the jellyfish scene was pretty normal and played for laughs. As for Kidman's visit to John Cusack in prison. . .

Come on. Agent Zero has to pay for that aquarium somehow!

Von Miller may want to stay away from Playboy bunnies in the future.

Odds on the FedEx courier suing the pants off Braun for defamation of character: EVEN.

Rule #1 when you rise to power: under no circumstances do you give power back to the person you've replaced.

Gonzalez is a fine and capable person. Still, a shunning is in order.

At with that, it's official: DVDVR deserves a better class of provocateur. Someone is not getting the job done.

To be fair, the apology the other Pouncey brother gave rang hollow. There is no "Free Hernandez" store, last I checked. It took planning to have those hats made. If they want to support their former teammate, that's fine. It's a free country. But at no point did one of them stop to think Hey, this may be a bad idea, with Aaron being cut and wiped from the NFL history books? Why make things hard for yourself on an issue where you can't win?

Not to mention that Carrey has sort of become creepy over the years. That love video he did for Emma Stone turned off a lot of people.

Good news, everyone! The babies have decided that you can remain alive, as you currently provide housing, clothing, transportation, diaper changing and foodstuffs. Once they turn six, though? All bets are off!

Yeah, I knew about his brother's murder. I can't imagine going through something like that. But his current demeanor seems to have been born from something besides that, at least to me. As if he's thinking How did I get here? I don't belong here. But I'll admit to not being a Kellerman fan. Nothing against him, just didn't have any use for him, either.

I don't know if Carrey is that bad so much as it doesn't feel as if he's evolved. His development as an actor suddenly stopped and now we have this man-child with potential, but no one has the patience to deal with him at this point.

Reynolds needs to get back into TV pronto. For now, his film career is toast. He should be a star. He has the look, he's decent enough as an actor. But he chooses the worst films to be in. As a result, Channing Tatum has come in and taken the spot Reynolds would have had with better choices. So unless he can pull a Ben Affleck career revival out of his hat, Reynolds best find a small-screen role to float him along for now.

If you were a white British guy named George in the 1980s, your music career was good to go.

Pretty much. Marcellus Wiley has the personality for a show like this, but he was better served when he co-hosted Winners Bracket with Michelle Beadle. He doesn't fit well with Kellerman, who seems really sad for whatever reason. Having your once-promising career come to this must suck.

Makes me think of Edge of Night, the defunct daytime soap opera. I don't think that's what they're going for.

All of your babies are moving in for total control of your homes. I hope you welcome your sippy-cup overlords.

Glad to hear that The Conjuring is good. I think I'll make a rare trip to the theater to see it.

72 degrees in this house, new air conditioning works great! Yes, I'm bragging. Nanny nanny boo boo.

If nothing else, at ESPN's numbers will be accurate and rationally explained.

No air conditioning, I take it? You have got to invest in one of those swamp coolers. It'll keep at least 1-2 rooms semi-cool, depending on the square footage. Just fill it with cold water and/or ice and enjoy some coolness.

My word. . .