Gorman

The funniest part is that he's applying to A&W, but it really looks like AEW.

Thoughts on Fall Brawl 95 Johnny B. Badd and Brian Pillman were supposed to wrestle with a 20-minute time limit, but for some reason they went to overtime, and Johnny won just shy of the 30-minute mark. Sgt. Craig Pittman used a distraction from Private Prince Iaukea to perform a spectacular descent from the ceiling to sneak up on Cobra. It fit with the War Games theme, and Pittman beat his ex-comrade-in-arms Cobra in less than two minutes. Diamond Dallas Page used help from Maxx Muscle and the Diamond Cutter to end Renegade's reign of terror as TV champion. DDP and Kimberly were doing the Savage-and-Elizabeth gimmick. Bobby Heenan cracked up Tony Schiavone by asking him to imagine Col. Parker and Sister Sherri's future kids running around. Parker and Sherri started making out in the extra ring while The Nasty Boys attacked Dick Slater & Bunkhouse Buck to give the tag team title back to Harlem Heat. Mean Gene compared himself running around backstage to Roger Bannister. The viewers' grandparents had to explain that Bannister had run the first sub-four-minute mile 41 years earlier. Arn Anderson is the MVP for beating Ric Flair, even though he had help from Brian Pillman. When you're trying to step out of Flair's shadow, cheating like him is fair game. Both men talked before the match about how much they loved each other like a brother. The match even took place in Horsemen Country (Asheville, NC). This would seem to be the recipe to elevate Arn to main-event singles status, but of course that didn't happen. The Dungeon of Doom was totally overmatched in War Games (Kamala-Shark-Zodiac-Meng vs. Hogan-Savage-Sting-Luger). It could have been worse; Vader was removed from Hogan's team in favor of Luger. Hogan enjoyed pummeling Kevin Sullivan for five minutes after the match until The Giant spoiled the party to set up Halloween Havoc.

It's surprising because Mickie is the current champion of another company, and she publicly complained that WWE returned her gear in a trash bag when they released her.

Thoughts on Bash at the Beach 95 Eric Bischoff knocked it out of the park at Bash at the Beach for the second straight year. Even though he didn't make a dime from ticket sales, the helicopter shots of the giant crowd on the beach made WCW look like a big deal. The waves crashing on the beach in the background during the matches looked great too. Even though this was a big homecoming for Hogan, it was the same for Sting, who retained the US title in front of his parents with a win over Meng. Paul Orndorff losing to Renegade led to a crisis of confidence from which only a psychic could save him. In a match that could have been dropped in from the 1987 WWF, Kamala beat Hacksaw Jim Duggan with help from Brutus Beefcake, who was on his third identity of the year (Zodiac). WCW started a triangle match with a coin flip again, but this was just to see which tag team started on the apron. Harlem Heat won by being in the middle of a three-team sandwich pin. Before he joined Hulk Hogan in the nWo, Dennis Rodman also had Hulk's back in the cage match against Vader. Indeed, he helped keep Kevin Sullivan and Zodiac from interfering. Hogan escaped the cage to retain the WCW title. So he and Vader feuded for more than six months, and neither man scored a pin or submission. Randy Savage is the MVP. He gained revenge for the Father's Day debacle by pinning Ric Flair with the big elbow, and he pleased the title sponsor by throwing Slim Jims to the crowd. Dig it!

I announced that one three times in three states in one weekend for Steel City Wrestling.

If you could combine Ring of Honor and the NWA and all these released people and put on a PPV every two months, you could ... maybe make money?

Punk can also go right back to Britt being the fourth pillar to get into MJF's head. If MJF ever goes to WWE, then it can become official.

You'll appreciate this, Natural. I borrowed Bryan Danielson's watch to time the first Punk-Joe match, because Gabe knew the fans at home would want to be sure that the match went the full 60 minutes.

Johnny B. Badd's song also called him "that man from New York City" to rhyme with "pretty," even though he was clearly from Macon, Georgia.

Thoughts on Great American Bash 95 Alex Wright beat Brian Pillman in a great high-flying match. WCW would eventually start many shows with a match like this to fire up the crowd. Dave Sullivan's arm wrestling win over DDP (to win a date with Kimberly) didn't need to be on pay-per-view. Also, if your name is Maxx Muscle, you will probably find work as a bodyguard. Harlem Heat and The Stud Stable won matches on the pre-show, and then faced each other on the pay-per-view, even though they were all heels. The Sherri-Col. Parker relationship was getting underway. Heat also tried to help the Blue Bloods win the tag team belts from the Nasty Boys (why?) but it backfired and the Nasties retained. Renegade used his "fake Ultimate Warrior powers" to overcome Arn Anderson for the TV title. Speaking of people who are supposed to remind us of WWF stars, Paul Wight showed up in the crowd again. Sting almost won MVP honors by beating Meng in the US title tournament final. Even though Hulk Hogan hijacked his promotion and relegated him to US title status - and even though Meng powered out of the Scorpion Deathlock - Sting battled on and hit a top-rope splash and DDT for the win. Randy Savage and Ric Flair played mind games with each other before their main event. Flair told Macho "I took your wife in '92," although that's not exactly what happened. Savage wished Angelo Poffo a happy Father's Day "wherever you are," only to reveal that Poffo would be his cornerman. Alas, Flair won the MVP award by ruining the Poffos' happy ending and bashing Savage with Angelo's cane to win the match. One more thing: David Penzer replaced Gary Michael Cappetta as ring announcer. My favorite GMC announcement? "He says he's the prettiest in WCW ... Johnny B. BAAAADDDD!!!"

Thoughts on Slamboree 95 The Nasty Boys won the WCW tag team belts and the MVP award in the opener with a win over Harlem Heat. Jerry Sags wrestled most of the match by himself after an attack by The Blue Bloods. His injured partner, Brian Knobs, just as valiantly came down to help, and they won clean with their finisher. This was also their last shot at the belts. Kevin Sullivan disposed of his brother at SuperBrawl and Brutus "The Man With No Name" Beefcake here, so he was free to answer the call of his FATHAH~! to form the Dungeon of Doom and attempt to destroy Hulkamania. Airing the legends match (Wahoo vs. Murdoch) in black-and-white was a nice touch. Paul Orndorff had no home-field advantage in Tampa, as the fans cheered The Great Muta to victory in an IWGP title match. Arn Anderson mercifully ended Alex Wright's winning streak with the perfect finish: faking a punch to set up the DDT. It didn't even make Wright look bad! The laws of wrestling physics stopped working in the Meng-Hawk match. Meng piledrove Hawk? Nothing. Hawk hit a Rude Awakening? No effect. Since obviously neither man was going to lose, this was the rare match where a double-countout was a good ending. Before Sting's win over Big Bubba, WCW didn't actually turn the lights out for the "lights out" match. That still wasn't as bad as the DQ in the no-DQ match at Uncensored. Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage couldn't be the Megapowers in WCW, so they had to settle for Monster Maniacs. Ric Flair was back in the ring, which made his loss at Halloween Havoc meaningless. Hogan pinned Flair, who got his heat back by attacking Angelo Poffo after the match to set up Flair-Savage for the main event of Great American Bash 95. One more thing: Paul Wight debuted by appearing in the aisle before and during the main event. Bobby Heenan came very close to saying Wight reminded him of Andre.

Thoughts on Uncensored 95 Uncensored wasn't a bad idea: continue feuds with some crazy gimmick matches. So why was Uncensored one of the worst PPVs ever? Because WCW didn't commit to the concepts, the rules, or anything else, and the show came off as being fake. That's not supposed to happen in wrestling! KING OF THE ROAD MATCH - For about 10 seconds, this seemed like an interesting idea for a match. But then poor Tony and the Brain had to sell how dangerous it was to get hit by a bale of hay or to lose your balance when the truck turns right. Blacktop Bully won by blowing the horn, which made some sense because he had the home-field advantage. The worst thing about this match was Dustin Rhodes getting fired because the bout was somehow too extreme. So in a seven-month span, WCW gift-wrapped Mankind and Goldust to eventually land in the WWF. MARTIAL ARTS MATCH - The only different thing about this match was the bowing at the beginning of the match. Referee Sonny Ono grabbed Hacksaw Jim Duggan's arm, and Meng superkicked him for the win. That's not supposed to happen in karate! BOXER vs. WRESTLER MACH - When Johnny B. Badd started the match with boxing gloves, I had flashbacks to UFC 1 fighter Art Jimmerson, whose one boxing glove did not help him on that night. Badd's trainer Roc Finnegan wisely cut off one of the boxing gloves and put a bucket on Arn Anderson's head, leading to a knockout win for Badd. NO-DISQUALIFICATION MATCH - Avalanche looked great against -- I REPEAT, NO-DISQUALIFICATION MATCH -- Randy Savage, before Ric Flair (inexplicably dressed in drag) attacked the Macho Man before Hogan returned the favor and made the save. Flair's interference caused Avalanche's disqualification in a ... oh, you know. Big Bubba Rogers is the MVP because he wrestled in the only non-gimmick match and pinned Sting in the middle of the ring. TEXAS TORNADO MATCH - The Nasty Boys beat Harlem Heat in an homage to a legendary concession-stand brawl that also took place in Tupelo, Mississippi (and actually included The Honky Tonk Man). The four men and Sherri brawled in a fake concession stand with no workers, no customers and no funnel cakes in the funnel-cake stand. Bobby Heenan had to ask what a funnel cake was! The Nasty Boys won as the camera panned away during the pinfall. The announcers didn't know the match had ended. STRAP MATCH - This must be a very dangerous match because for the second time, the World title was not on the line in a strap match involving Vader. Not only did WCW try to trick the fans into thinking The Ultimate Warrior would be in Hogan's corner, but Hulk tied the strap to Ric Flair's wrist and dragged him to all four corners to win the match. When people talk about stupid matches that don't make any sense with the shorthand "Because WCW," you can trace it back to Savage and Hogan's matches on this show.

Thoughts on SuperBrawl V Alex Wright kept his winning streak going with a win over Paul Roma. The fans cheered Roma because they were already sick of Wright being shoved down their throats. The Butcher went from main-eventing Starrcade to being in Kevin Sullivan's corner on the undercard. Not only that, but Kevin bashed his brother Dave into Butcher's surgically repaired face to win the match before walking off without him. Sister Sherri accidentally hit her own man again and apparently cost Harlem Heat the tag team titles in their defense against the Nasty Boys, but they retained the belts on a Dusty finish. Anyone who didn't recognize Blacktop Bully as Demolition Smash or Repo Man (or even Krusher Kruschev) would think Dustin Rhodes had lost to a loudmouth from the crowd. Commissioner Nick Bockwinkel wisely kicked Meng out of ringside before the match because Meng had attacked Hacksaw Jim Duggan after his win over Bunkhouse Buck. Randy Savage looked great teaming with Sting against Avalanche and Big Bubba. He wasn't able to keep up his late-80s form throughout his WCW run, but on this night, he flew all over the ring and earned the MVP award. Ric Flair only stayed away from WCW for one PPV, as he got Vader disqualified in his title match against Hulk Hogan, with Macho Man coming to Hulk's rescue. Flair's involvement with Vader was a downgrade from Harley Race, and it would get a LOT worse one month later at Uncensored.

I didn't think they were terrible while they were happening, but you may all pity me for watching Sabu-Sandman at November to Remember 97 and Sid-Nightstalker at the Clash in Jacksonville.

Flair-Steamboat at Chi-Town Rumble. Best match I've ring announced was the first Joe-Punk match at World Title Classic.

Thoughts on Starrcade 94 Bobby Heenan was the only person trying to sell The Butcher as having a ghost of a chance of beating Hulk Hogan for the WCW title. Everyone else was ready to skip to the "friend or foe?" story between Hogan and the Macho Man. Hulk was so unconcerned that he ran out to help Sting just before his own title defense. It would have been better to get Hogan-Butcher out of the way at the Clash and then have Hogan defend at Starrcade against Avalanche or you know, the No. 1 contender, Vader. Vader is the MVP for winning the US title from Hacksaw Jim Duggan to really become the No. 1 contender. Then he barged into Hogan's dressing room and challenged him to really, really become the No. 1 contender. So with the Savage issue settled ("friend"), the only question in WCW heading into 1995 was, will Vader win the title from Hogan? Even though he lost to German teenager Alex Wright, Jean-Paul Levesque already looked like the finished product of a WWF wrestler with his size, aggression, and snob gimmick. It's just surprising that his WCW stay was so brief. Johnny B. Badd was announced as defending the TV title against The Honky Tonk Man, but Arn Anderson came out instead. This was a last-minute decision, because Arn and Bunkhouse Buck had already wrestled in the dark match, defeating Brad & Scott Armstrong. Mr. T showed up for his match against Kevin Sullivan dressed as a referee who had just woken from a long winter's nap. Sister Sherri's management of Harlem Heat got off to a rocky start on PPV. She maced her own guy and splashed her own guy off the top rope. Still, they were obviously a winning combination that would eventually capture the tag team title. Jimmy Hart vowed that he would never turn his back on Hulkamania (or Hulk-Mania, as Michael Buffer called it). Let's remember that. Also, Bobby Heenan predicted that Hogan would eventually stab Sting in the back. Let's remember that one, too.

It wouldn't have been a Christmas party because the Alliance went out of business in November.

Thoughts on Halloween Havoc 94 Johnny B. Badd opened his sixth PPV in a row, defending the TV title against Honky Tonk Man. It was a Little Richard impersonator vs. an Elvis impersonator. Too bad the KISS Demon wasn't around yet to referee. Marcus Alexander Bagwell had another brief tag team title reign like he had with 2 Cold Scorpio. This time, The Patriot was his partner, and they didn't keep the belts long before losing the belts to Pretty Wonderful. When Dave Sullivan came out to a brand-new theme song called "I Want to Be a Hulkamaniac," it made me think Hogan's career would probably not be ending that night. Steve Austin got a chance to regain the US title from Hacksaw Jim Duggan, but Austin got disqualified for throwing Hacksaw over the top rope. I'm sorry, but this rule made WCW look weak. You could throw someone over the top rope in the WWF, and it would be no problem. The fact that everyone got thrown over the top rope in Battlebowl or World War 3 showed that getting thrown over the top rope wasn't the end of the world. Vader beat Guardian Angel for the fourth time on PPV in 1994. Add the Bossman's loss to Rude when he first showed up, and he really didn't have a very successful run in WCW. With Cactus Jack out of the company, the Nasty Boys took over as WCW's most popular brawlers. They won after Jerry Sags piledrove Terry Funk onto a pumpkin. Reason No. 258 not to be in a long-distance relationship: You might get stuck in a lengthy, uncomfortable conversation with your girlfriend while the two top stars in wrestling battle in a steel cage with the World title and both of their careers on the line. Maybe 27 years later, you might get another chance to watch the match. The guy who dresses up as Hogan was in Detroit to see his hero retire Ric Flair. He was in Orlando at Bash at the Beach to see Hulk win the title. Maybe this made up for him watching Undertaker and Yokozuna crush the Hulkster to win the WWF title. Brutus Beefcake came to the ring with Jimmy Hart and Hogan, but he disappeared back to the dressing room during the match. When Sherri climbed the cage to help Flair, Jimmy Hart and Sting tried to help, but Beefcake wasn't there. A masked man came out from under the ring, and he also went to the back. After Hogan won, the masked man came out and attacked Hogan, who unmasked him as Beefcake. As Hogan tried to process his best friend turning on him, he was attacked by Kevin Sullivan and Earthquake. Bobby Heenan crying after Flair's loss was the counterpoint to his celebration when Flair won Royal Rumble 92.

Great peek a year into the future.

Thoughts on Fall Brawl 94 Johnny B. Badd wins the co-MVP award for opening every PPV in 1994 to this point and finally cashing in by defeating Lord Steven Regal for the TV title. Dave Sullivan tried to stop Kevin Sullivan and Cactus Jack from hitting each other with chairs in their loser-leave-town match. It was strange to see Kevin Sullivan come to the ring with a card-carrying Hulkamaniac like his brother. Demolition Smash/Repo Man was dressed as a trucker and was being a nuisance in the crowd. It was lot like Doink hanging out in the crowd before he debuted. Hacksaw Jim Duggan squashing Steve Austin to win the US title was the perfect illustration of where this company was going. Cactus Jack had been run out of town in the previous match. It was like WCW didn't only reboot Hulkamania, but also its own audience. The idea was, "we're going for fans who are into '80s WWF nostalgia, and if we alienate our old fanbase, that's life." Removing Meng from WarGames and replacing him with Col. Rob Parker for no reason was stupid. Of course, Dusty Rhodes and the Nasty Boys ganged up on the poor Colonel until he quit. What did that prove? Vader spent most of the year wrestling Sting and The Guardian Angel, and on this night he beat both of them. The triangle match started with Sting winning a coin toss and sitting out. Vader beat Guardian Angel (again!) and then beat Sting in sudden death when the masked man attacked Sting. So Vader can share the MVP award. Now what was the motivation here? The masked man is ostensibly working for Ric Flair, who is calling himself the retired real world champion after his countout win over Hogan at the Clash in Cedar Rapids, Iowa. So he helps Vader become No. 1 contender? Then Hogan puts his career on the line to goad Flair out of retirement for the winner-take-all match at Halloween Havoc. It wouldn't have made sense for Hogan to show up in July and get bounced out of the sport in October. Too bad that wasn't the only career on the line that night. Oh, and let's see how long it takes for Vader to get his title shot.

Thoughts on Bash at the Beach 94 Eric Bischoff is the MVP. Seizing the opportunity to sign Hulk Hogan was the first of his "all in" moves to make a real challenge to the WWF rather than being content to stay in business and be No. 2. From booking the Orlando Magic basketball arena, to enlisting everyone from Shaq to Mr. T to George Foreman, Bischoff did everything he could to make "Hulk Hogan is in WCW and he's the champion" as big as possible. Bischoff only booked six matches for this show and didn't use any green talent. Ten years after Hogan won the WWF title, Bischoff rebooted Hulkamania for the benefit of anyone who still cared about it. The post-match celebration was a preview of what was to come (Brutus Beefcake and Hacksaw Jim Duggan). Arn Anderson turning on Dustin Rhodes was so predictable, yet so perfect. The only person who didn't see it coming was Jesse Ventura, who said, "If Arn Anderson says he'll be your partner, he'll stay by your side." Guardian Angel couldn't catch a break again. He stole a nightstick from Harley Race, didn't use it, but still got disqualified! And if he was really a member of the Guardian Angels, shouldn't some of the other Angels have been at ringside?

Thoughts on Slamboree 94 Terry Funk is the MVP for bringing his brand of hardcore wrestling to the entire show. First, he didn't come out with the parade of legends to open the show. Why? Because he later explained that he was THE legend. He wrestled Tully Blanchard in a legends match that he turned into a crazy brawl. He increased his relevance by calling Dusty Rhodes an "egg-sucking dog" and attacking his son, Dustin. On the mic and in the ring, Funk showed one of his best qualities: he just won't go away. Speaking of Funk, I'm sure the cameraman got in trouble for focusing on a sign that read, "The Funker Rules Philly - ECW Style" Barry Windham got another chance to beat Ric Flair in a World title match, but he lost again. WCW asked fans to pay extra money to answer the question "Should Cactus Jack be banned from wrestling?" immediately before and after he won the WCW tag team title. And if Maxx Payne was in the building to DESTROY Jerry Sags with a guitar shot, why didn't he team with Cactus to win the title after their two previous brawls? If it weren't for Funk, Sting would be the easy MVP winner, for nobly refusing to be handed the International World title at the beginning of the show and then beating Vader for it at the end of the show.

It should be called the Peruvian Calavera Choke, according to Rosa.

I feel like when Koko debuted in the WWF, this move was called the Birdbuster. Then Gorilla accidentally called it the Ghostbuster, and that's the name that stuck.