Pete

Holier crap. Figuratively and literally. A big get for the WCC and a double whammy for the WAC who are suddenly down to eight schools after that big expansion a few years ago.

Holstein Kiel vs Fortuna Dusseldorf in a promotion six-pointer later today in 2. Bundesliga. If Kiel win: Kiel will be promoted to the Bundesliga for the first time in club history; Dusseldorf will be locked into the third place Pro/Rel playoff; St Pauli will be promoted to the Bundesliga before they even play tomorrow. As you were, lads.

Holy crap.

We could have another 1994 with the Knicks and Rangers gunning for their titles. I don't know if the Knicks can pull it off when they're being held together with Reynolds Wrap and chewing gum, but this Rangers squad looks monstrous at the moment.

Apparently that oxygen thief had his KID with him. Good luck explaining that one to the wife.

TBF I think those prices were by the tray. Still ridiculous but not quite as ridiculous.

4-0 to the Palace. Dead man coaching.

Back to back promotions for Dem Tractor Boys. Unreal. Leeds, Southampton, WBA and Norwich are your playoff clubs du jour of the day. Birmingham did their business but so did Blackburn, so the Blues are DOOMED to the third tier along with Huddersfield for the first time since 1994.

At the half: IPS 1-0 HUD • LEE 1-2 SOU • BIR 0-0 NOR As things currently stand, Ipswich are up, Leeds are in the playoffs and Birmingham/Huddersfield are down. I so wish we could stream Soccer Saturday this side of the pond.

So, the AFL...

Hope you walked that one off afterwards. It was quite a stretch.

I just started watching this seeing as it was on... I'm not sure if starting with the Colt episode is a mistake or not, because that is a hard one to top for batshit craziness. What a supernova he was.

Not sure if this is a regular deal, but the Backyard Brawl (Pitt vs WVU) is taking place at PNC Park tonight on ESPN2.

Ipswich do the business and control their own destiny. One point against a Huddersfield side with one foot in the grave (three points from safety, a minus-15 GD against the Plymouth side they need to leapfrog) and they're back in the Prem.

Speaking of weird, there's a pretty solid chance St Pauli will clinch promotion to the Bundesliga with a win in their next match on Friday. At their arch rivals HSV. Why yes, it will be on ESPN+. Come for the footy, stay for the riot?

Guys, it happened again!

At times like this, I spare a thought for her brother Anthony. Made Bradley's all-century team, became a legit superstar in Euroleague with Maccabi Tel Aviv, had a solid NBA career, literally the second-best baller in his Naperville house. Gratz Candace!

In the world's most exciting league, Ipswich are level with Leeds on points after getting held late at Hull. They play Coventry Tuesday before it all kicks off on Saturday.

Sheffield United are mercifully relegated after getting stuffed 5-1 at the Toon.

Awesomely, the "Demon Squad" folks have used the MST3K experience as a net positive and successfully Kickstarted money for a sequel off the notoriety.

That cover photo goes sooooooooooo fucking hard.

No lie detected. The Garden Roar is back.

Oh, like we wouldn't be double-teaming you like the Andersons.

Nathaniel Eleven Hag Patrick Twelve Hag Aloysius Fourteen Hag (UNITED SUPERSTITIOUS)

I guess you could say things in Blackburn have gone... pear-shaped.