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Fuzzy Dunlop

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Everything posted by Fuzzy Dunlop

  1. I saw Everything Everywhere All At Once for the second time at the cinema over the weekend which is the first time I've gone to the cinema twice for a film since Fury Road. It's even better the second time.
  2. Aw man, the Seinfeld scene might well be my favourite sitcom scene ever. Playing a friggin' library investigations officer as a hardboiled cop show detective was just so fucking good; he is note fucking perfect in that scene. No surprise Seinfeld couldn't get through it without corpsing. ''Well, let me tell ya something, funny boy'' and 'Well, I got a flash for ya, joy boy, party time is over'' are still quotes me and a mate of mine will drop randomly to each other in messages. RIP to one of those actors who even if he was in something shit you knew at least he'd be good in it.
  3. Bob Mortimer is, without question, my all time favourite TV personality bar none.
  4. Real Madrid are old and slow as fuck and Liverpool will dominate them and beat them easy? No?
  5. You know, you pay your TV licence and a lot of times the BBC trots out a load of old shit but sometimes they'll produce little gems of a show. I re-watched (again) Mortimer and Whitehouse: Gone Fishing and it is one such little gem. Mortimer is a man child and the most likeable person you will ever see on TV, Whitehouse is his grumpier friend, they go fishing, Mortimer falls over a lot, Whitehouse repeatedly shouts don't wind, Mortimer says he's not winding when he clearly is, they talk about mental health and men's health, they do impressions, they tell jokes, Mortimer falls over again, Whitehouse does Ted the dog's voice, Mortimer talks about his dad dying when he was young, Whitehouse scatters his own dad's ashes at his dad's favourite fishing spot, Fergal Sharkey shows up and they sing Teenage Kicks, they do some more fishing, Mortimer shows unparalleled joy at catching a fish and then falls over again, this is one long run-on sentence...and away. It is funny, life affirming, looks great, has a great soundtrack and is the most perfect fucking TV you will ever watch even if you don't give a shit about fishing.
  6. I mean, the BBC is just stating the facts there.
  7. Yes, I am quoting myself. Again, not single one of you will give a flying fart but since I posted this absolute bastard jinx of a post Derry have won 2 out of 9, lost the last 3 on the bounce and are now 7 points behind Shamrock Rovers. I mean, again, it's still early days but I believe it was Oscar Wilde or else the voiceover dude from Shawshank who said ''Hope is a dangerous thing. Hope can drive a man insane.'' Anyway, I'm not posting another single thing about Derry until they actually win the league. I'll see you in 2047.
  8. Favourite characters in this? Michelle, Orla, Aunt Sarah, Sister Michael and then everyone else in joint 5th place. There are no bad characters in Derry Girls, it's bordering on perfect at times but they are my top 4.
  9. So, yeah, Everything Everywhere All At Once is the best film of the year already, right? I mean I knew I'd like it when I heard it was from the Swiss Army Man dudes but, holy fuck, it's a bagelling, talking racooning, dildoing, butt plugging, spanking, hotdog fingering, insane, beautiful, fucking great film. 806 trillion stars.
  10. Well, after that, good luck to Seville city centre tonight is all I can say.
  11. The last ever episode of my wee hometown's pride and joy Derry Girls (unless they do a film? Lisa McGee if you're reading? Okay, you're not going to be reading a wrestling forum but a film, yeah? Please?) just finished and, good jaysus, talk about sticking the landing; an absolute note perfect ending in which, to use a Derry phrase, the tears and snotters will be tripping off ye. Massive credit to everyone involved including the cameos (holy fuck, the cameos) but especially to Lisa McGee, you absolute wee cert ye.
  12. Anyone from the UK/Ireland watched the new wrestling 'comedy' Deep Heat on ITV2? Don't. It's fucking shite. I probably lost you at ITV2, to be fair.
  13. Not a single one of you will give a flying fart but 9 games into the new season and my hometown team Derry City sit unbeaten 6 points clear at the top of the league which has everyone here already dreaming of them winning their first league title since I was 12 years old (25 FUCKING YEARS AGO). It's still early days of course and things might go tits up because going tits up is what Derry do when they come within a sniff of the league title so I don't want to get too carried away but Derry City at present are the best team in Europe, will win the domestic treble and then beat Man City 14-0 in the European Cup final.
  15. I do think the Leeds move is a good move for James, he seems like a genuine good dude and it just didn't work out for him at Man United. I mean, to be fair, at times, he was fucking awful but, yeah, I do think Bielsa will probably improve him. That being said, Ronaldo or no Ronaldo, Man United won't win a league with Fred in midfield. I'd be happy to be proven wrong if Fred scored the winning goal that won them the league but, yeah, ain't gonna happen. I just watched Soccer Aid and there's no convincing me otherwise that 513 year old balding greying Paul Scholes wouldn't do a better job than Fred.
  16. I mean, if any of you can possibly access LOITV you could check out Derry City, the greatest team in the world or, at least, the greatest team in Derry.
  17. I'm not even particularly a fan of Punk and I don't exactly watch AEW every week (it's absolutely nothing against AEW, I just don't watch as much modern wrestling these days, unfortunately. It's legit years since I watched a full WWE show) and I know I'm super late to the party but, holy shit, what a pop and they seemed to get even fucking louder when he walked out almost like they were half expecting MJF or some shit and not Punk to actually walk out but then he did because, well, what the fuck is that shit, AEW? You stupid fucking idiots aren't doing this shit right, you're not supposed to give the people what they want.
  18. Last night I dreamt Harley Quinn speared the eyeball of a giant alien starfish using a javelin so a million rats could climb into its eyeball and kill it right after said giant alien starfish launched a walking talking shark man who sounded awfully like the guy from Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot into a building and squashed a polka dot looking dude who moments earlier had destroyed the giant alien starfish's arm (or leg...) with some killer shooty polka dot things after picturing it as a giant version of his own mother. It was the weirdest fucking dream. I've never read a comic book in my life so I had no idea who any of the characters were (and it sounds like some of them were so obscure as fuck that even some comic readers didn't know them) apart from Harley Quinn and then Amanda Waller, Rick Flag and the Boomerang guy (and I only know those three from watching that shower of shite first film) but I loved this. I knew I'd love it from the opening scenes which Gunn knocked out of the fucking park. The Detachable Kid shit had me guffawing, WHAT THE FUCK indeed. If Gunn does another one, he has to go full bonkers.
  19. So there's this racist as fuck England fan on the internet who posted a racist as fuck tweet on the internet before deleting it but not before a bunch of people on the internet took a screenshot of it and about 3 seconds later starting tweeting his employers on the internet because said racist fuck had his full name, job title, employer and a convenient selfie posted on the internet and now his employers are looking into it and he could lose his job. Point being, he's on the fucking internet. Not very bright these racist fucks. Some of the other stuff I've been hearing about since last night is just depressing too and it is, of course, only a small minority, the vast majority have come out in support of young lads who had the guts to step up and take a penalty. I love football as much as the next guy but it is only football.
  20. It's funny that the first thing a lot of people think of when the match is over is, fucking hell England fans, try not to be cunts. But, some of them can't help themselves.
  21. Yeah, maybe some of the scumbag England fans (not all, by any means, the vast majority are great football fans but some...) will go out and rampage in their own cities because they lost a football match. That England team will be back, way too many good young players for them not to but, yeah, Italy's year. They deserved to win it.
  22. There was already a sign (I say, a 'sign', I think it was just an old bed sheet) left near his house before he signed warning him not to sign but then he signed anyway so clearly he paid no heed to that ominous intimidating bed sheet. The 'small club' thing apparently or maybe it was left by a Liverpool fan or, who knows, maybe it wasn't even meant for him at all. I mean, that's unlikely, to be fair. Say for argument sake, imagine (and we'll all have to really stretch our imagination here) next season Everton batter Liverpool 5-0 at Anfield, imagine they win the League, imagine they win the European Cup the following season? Would he still not be welcome then? Football is a fickle business. I mean, speaking as a Man United fan, I thought Mourinho was a twat before he got the United job and then he got the job and then...actually, no, that's a bad example. I still thought he was a twat. Carry on.
  23. So, yeah, Italy have to win it now, right? RIGHT? Nah, it's going to be fucking England, isn't it? Fuck.
  24. Um...yeah...this tournament just started getting really fucking good. I mean, we should have known the tournament would really start kicking off last night when Pepe, in probably his last ever tournament, continued the time honoured Pepe tradition of being an absolute shithead. It just wouldn't be a tournament without it. Pogba went hey top corner, yeah you top corner, I'm gonna put this ball right into the fucking middle of you and then the top corner went okay, yeah, go for it and then he did. But then Switzerland weren't done.
  25. I mean, Denmark were never not going to win that one, right? In Copenhagen? With that crowd? Nah. Made all the better by Micah Richards covering it and sounding like he was having the time of his life; a man who brings out the best in all the other pundits around him and managed to make Roy Keane break character on TV and now they seem like genuine mates. Best pundits or commentators on ITV/BBC of the tournament so far? Richards and Ally McCoist, quite easily with a shoutout to Emma Hayes who actually analyses the match and doesn't just throw out empty cliched generic nonsense like Jenas or Spud Murphy when they've clearly never seen a player play before and are just bluffing their way through it. ''So Jermaine, what do you think of -insert attacking midfielder here-?'' ''Yeah, he finds little pockets of space, he's not afraid to shoot from 25 yards, he's got a goal in him'' etc. etc. etc.
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