Sex Machine Gun

The Bengals went with a Patriots-esque mild massaging of their uniforms to create a new design. I dig it, but I already liked their uniforms anyway. Much better update than the Falcons last year.

Given he's been living in the online world since he left WWE, what would have possessed Ryback to include "retire" as an option? If I was on Twitter I'd say go back to WWE so he could be fed (har har, irony) to Roman in a post-SummerSlam feud.

EDIT: Double Post

I second the "about the same" answer. It doesn't matter who the champs of anything are, wrestling's kind of in the toilet popularity-wise, entertainment in general is fractured into more and more niches, and watching live television is increasingly rare. You could book whoever you want to win the straps but they'll be hard pressed to even have half the viewers of a 1999 episode of Nitro.

Heyman's always good but damn was that a great line during his interview segment: "there was no rain delay, those were the tears of angels."

"Listen the rhythm of the falling rain, telling me just what a fool I've been..."

McAfee is making SD appointment TV for me tonight.

Stupid sexy Hook!

Finally they got rid of all that dead weight! Now we can get another Corbin push like we've all been clamoring for.

You'd think that BIG MONEY MATT HARDY~ could afford to have others fight for him.

Oh shit, we had Tyson tonight! ... sure wish I knew how his appearing and involvement will improve buyrates/sales. I'll admit I can't remember what even happened in that match, but even if something earthshattering happened I couldn't tell you what that particular angle was at play.

This show did well to forward or renew feuds but holy fuck was it trash. Here's how poorly this kept my attention, as someone who considers Wednesday their wrestling night: I paused it while on the phone with someone with 45 minutes left in the show. So little of an impression had been made on me as a fan to where I realized I'd whiffed on the main angles in the last hour. Nothing made me want to see more even though I'd already been nominally into the program. Team Taz and Christian is a goddamn plot culdesac.

There really needs to be at least one brand new (to TV) person in a match every week on Dynamite. Unlike the 90s we aren't looking at a bunch of people who have had to work within the parameters of a network program in AEW. This isn't a bad thing but something people overlook too often. You can't just go from, say, some PWG show to national television without adjustments. The sooner the greener members of the roster get TV experience, the better.

So one of two things is at play. One, they're creatively bankrupt and desperately trying to get every drop of juice from the Wrestlemania fruit. Two, they assume people who aren't fans are so goddamn stupid that "Wrestlemania" is a synonym for "pro wrestling" in their heads. You know, like how UFC is up in the hundreds with their card titles. Is WWE's concept of their fans where they imagine a group of people sitting around in October asking each other "You wanna watch Wrestlemania tonight?"

Tim White finally got the job done!

It's possible for the venue but only if there was no elaborate entrance stage. 90-something was probably more like it. The stadium's website went off of the kayfabe figure which you can tell because they mention WM III having 93k previously.

Maybe you play the sound of a railroad crossing closing no matter whether he hits it or not. HOW IS THIS BRAINSTORMING BETTER THAN RAW ITSELF

I was bummed too but think there wasn't a choo-choo since he wasn't going to hit anyone and got biffed in the face with the ring steps instead. EDIT: They should have played the sound of a train crashing! Missed opportunity there, Dunn.

I can't believe they used a Clone High USA gag, intentionally or unintentionally, when Riddle said his braces were picking up radio transmissions.

What an underwhelming followup to Mania. They couldn't even give me SLAPJACK~

I'm starting to wonder which one of you is Tony Khan. I know it isn't me. ("That's exactly what he'd say!")

Boy am I glad someone else is pushing back against the "sell tickets for Mania" narrative. Also, whoever thinks there was a legit 100k in Dallas in 2016 is out of their mind.

Via Wrestlinginc: I'm more curious to see what the people who lost are doing next. Does Drew keep scrapping with Lashley? Is anyone expected to be called up soon? Does THE MAN return to challenge (and ultimately put over) Rhea Ripley? Will Riddle develop an edge? This came up in the Discord during Wrestlemania's second night: does WWE try to mimic the post-Mania Raw crowd through artificial noise? Highly doubtful I think, denying us the true WM weekend experience until 2022.

I'll be very disappointed if Maffew doesn't dub some martial arts "whoosh, whoosh" movement sounds over that. It may have seemed like I was being too hard on Tamina in the Discord but last night was the first time I'd personally heard a crowd react to her in any substantial way. Quite the shock considering they'd just sat through Fiend shit. Speaking of Fiend shit, I'm actually... curious to see what happens next since it was heavily implied that he was under Bliss's control. Is this the payoff for calling her "the goddess" for years?

I've decided to call middle age Edge's wide-eyed and angry face the Aggro Crag.