Craig H

Who does Aleister Black kill tonight? I’m just guessing he’ll be on tonight’s Raw.

Killing Joel was fucking stupid in the game. Making you play as Abby to feel sympathy for her was even dumber. And look, if their intent is to keep the story beats the same, fine, whatever, but I’m not sticking around to watch their depression and melodrama fest. There is enough of that shit in the world. So the way it played out more than it actually happening is what annoyed me the most. This had all of the hallmarks of the worst crap from Game of Thrones, but worse. Before we even get to the incredible plot armor on characters, the way Abby and Joel meet is just so stupid and the biggest of convenient coincidences. She is presumably searching for Joel for 5 years. They’re stationed out of Seattle or wherever in the PNW. It’s ludicrous to think Jackson Hole, WY is the only large settlement they’ve come across because the game world has already established government controlled settlements across the country. Abby’s crew would have been murked a long time ago, but here they are and they’re just astonished at Jackson Hole not only because it’s larger than they thought seeing it in daylight, but because they have security detail, which is practically EVERY city settlement. This time they’re sure Joel is in Jackson. So Abby just happens to venture out by herself when they’re doing recon in pairs before that. She almost quite literally slips on a banana peel to trigger an infected Zerg rush. And while fungi and cordyceps can survive in extremely cold conditions, these are bodies that have deteriorated and have been buried in probably -20 to -30 degree temps and snow. Those bodies shouldn’t be moving that fast, but whatever, everything else is convenient so let’s allow it. Abby escapes one disaster after another only to be rescued in a random ass town by Joel? AND…you see these infected running fast enough to keep pace at a distance from a horse. Just a few minutes prior Abby is outrunning them. So Abby, in snow, is faster than a horse?! By the time Abby goes golfing I didn’t even care or have the outrage I felt during the game. It just didn’t hit that hard because of everything that led to that point. Pairing Dina with Joel was maybe the one thing that may have better than Joel and his brother. The rest was just spectacle for the sake of spectacle while shrouding anyone with a name in plot armor. Jackson Hole has all of these defenses and a wall, but they never bother to dig a wide trench around the perimeter to slow down anyone? The horde breaks through and ONLY the bloater and no other infected chase Joel’s brother into that back alley? Plus, it took a whole tank of fuel that ran out incredibly fast to barely take down a single bloater? So just seeing that and knowing what I know, I don’t particularly care to continue watching flashbacks and Abby centric episodes. Plus, my biggest complaint is that from the start I thought Dever would have been the perfect Ellie. Now here we are and Ellie’s character is so insufferable and looks so young that it just feels more like a little kid lashing out than someone like Dever who looks more mature and could make Ellie’s rebellious streak more tolerable. I’m just not very thrilled with what they’re giving Bella Ramsey.

Aaaaaaand I’m out. Fuck it.

It's important to remember that Cena, despite however many Make a Wishes he did, was and is a sociopath and very likely a psychopath. I'm not shocked in the lease that he's this fucking tone deaf and stupid mainly because he doesn't care. He also loved Nikki at one point too. We saw how that went.

This. Fucking Tony and his similar concept matches with names with alliteration in them.

Holy fucking shit. The Daredevil and Frank team-up scene needed the Doom music. And my biggest complaint isn't even a fair one - it's that these stupid as fuck rules about Kingpin being allowed on TV but not in movies and Spider-Man being allowed in movies and not on TV is going to deprive us of at least one, maybe two episodes with Spider-Man in it. Or Brand New Day with Kingpin in it. Aside from that, this season was hard as fuck. Holy shit. Disney and Feige are all like, sure, you can let Frank put three bullets through a cops head at point blank range. Fuck the police. Thank you to everyone who made this show for giving me my fantasy of corrupt as hell cops getting what they fucking deserve.

Anarchy in the Arena works best in a stadium.

Anyway, back to the matteer at hand, I rewatched that Dynamite this morning waiting for the Last Epoch update and yeah, that's definitely in the top 10 for best Dynamites ever. I really fucking stoked for Collision tonight which is probably the first time I could say that in a long time. I got pretty misty eyed seeing Hobbs and Shibata each hold AEW gold for the first time. More so for Hobbs because Shibata was at least ROH Pure Champion for a bit. Sucks for Hook and sucks even more that I'm guessing he was puking last week because he was concussed and not because he had a stomach bug. And man, that Mone vs Athena match fucking ruled. After being pretty down on the very drawn out build to WM and feeling like I had lost interest in that show, it was nice to have Dynamite pick up the pieces for me and say, hey, wrestling is pretty awesome.

Smashing Pumpkins and Weezer were probably my 1A and 1B favorite bands for a good long while from middle school through high school. NIN was probably my second/third favorite. And then a bunch of punk bands. Then in the early 2000s it was Foo Fighters and less of the first two, in 2007 on my way to WM 23 I listened to Silversun Pickups for the first time and they instantly became my all time favorite group mainly because they had a lot of that Smashing Pumpkins sound, some songs that felt like they could imprint on your DNA like Weezer songs, and lyrics like they were written by Trent. Then I went a good long while without listening to Smashing Pumpkins or Weezer because the former were a mess, Billy Corgan seemed like he was out of his mind, and Weezer had practically zero growth. At some point in the last few years I went back to listening to them both heavily again along with Pickups and I found myself liking them both way more again. Absence makes the heart grow fonder I guess. I'm able to separate Corgan's wackadoo bullshit from the music and I think Infinite Sadness is still the best Pumpkins album and listen to Zero a ton. Downward Spiral still rips really fucking hard, but The Fragile is my favorite album of NIN's, with We're in this Together Now being the one I listen to the most, more than anything off of TDS or PHM. And I rather like Weezer's seasons albums. Looking forward to seeing NIN for the first time ever this year and Silversun Pickups for the 4th time. I'm not sure I'd want to go see the Pumpkins or Weezer live again mainly because I don't know what the Pumpkins fanbase even looks like these days because it feels pretty detached from their Chicago base and I had the unfortunate luck of my only Weezer concert (I think after Make Believe was released) being one where Rivers had zero energy and they looked very disinterested. This was a very weird tangent, but I love talking about music?

This is the year the MCU finally bounces the fuck back. Daredevil, Thunderbolts, and Fantastic Four. Hell yeah. Fuck yeah.

This show fucking ruled from start to finish. THAT’S pro wrestling motherfuckers. Everything was awesome. The setting was cool as shit and looked like people were hanging from the rafters, every match delivered, all of the story beats were great, Mone and Toni had a hell of a moment on top of what was a great match, I’m really surprised the Hurt Syndicate made it that competitive, HANGMAN MOTHERFUCKERS, Ospreay vs Takeshita was great even if they had to take a little bit off their fastball to do that match on tv and to both stay healthy, HOBBS IS A CHAMPION, JOE IS GONNA KILL YOU, SUCK IT BISCHOFF.

Pro Wrestling fucking rules.

I’m 100% getting Marathon. Fuck yeah.

Isn't this the second time he's had a Master P inspired shirt? I could swear he had one in AEW. Or before AEW. Or maybe it was someone else. This is so close to being animal abuse.

I got this and laughed pretty hard, but I think it was so subtle that it went over everyone's heads, including the announcers. Kenny stood there looking around with this "really, no one else gets this?" look on his face. Young Cucks indeed. As for Hook, everyone has a different tolerance when they're sick. If I'm sick, like pukey sick, either just a bug, hungover (thankfully it has been maybe 10+ years since that has last happened, maybe 15), or with a migraine, I am just done. I'm not doing a fucking thing. I don't have a "flu game" in me. My flu game is muscling up the will to eat like 5 saltines and drink a Sprite and maybe the Liptons noodle soup packet things. Hook is out there wrestling and almost got through the entire segment before blowing chunks. I think that might be my first time seeing someone throw up in ring too. I have seen baseball players do that all the time, including watching person at a minor league game, but never in wrestling. So, uh, congrats Hook. You're now one of a few to get sick in ring on live tv joining CM Punk who sharted or dooked in ring and, uh, well, I think that's it. So yeah, it's just you and Punk.

MORE. DANCING.

God. Everything Bron does needs the Doom music.

Christ. Bert and Tony Hinchcliffe? Fuck this.

Original Rogue was you have one life. That's it. Whatever you get you don't carry any bit with you when you die. You basically start over from the start. No checkpoints or anything. Rogue-likes are "friendlier" in that when you die you start over from the beginning, but you typically get to augment yourself in some way shape or form that lets you be more powerful going into your next run.

In any event, if it’s good, I’m going to play it because it’s Bungie.

I have Deep Rock Galactic but I’ve never played it. I also thought Tarkov was a battle royale game. Oh god, as I get olderi guess I get more out of touch with games like I do with music.

I can't think of an extraction shooter that I've played... I've messed with Dark and Darker, which isn't a shooter, but you do have to exit from the map at some point. Would Helldivers 2 count? You're literally getting extracted at the end of every mission so I guess if there's one, that's probably it.

Really awesome show, but yeah, I'm of two minds about the main event. I'm not thrilled at all about Mox still being champion not because it's Mox, but because this gimmick and angle forces him out of having excellent matches with excellent finishes and in particular continues the overbooking mess and the stranglehold that he has on the top of the card. I love Moxley, but I fucking hate that this angle has taken all the fun out of the guy. Swerve winning would have been the better finish. On the other hand, I really like the Young Bucks (when they're motivated which it seems like they weren't in their last title run) and I had completely forgotten about them until their surprise return. That really shocked me. Toni vs Bayne ruled and now I have an even bigger crush on Toni with her no makeup look in that montage. The triple threat was fucking insane. For a match where there was no other outcome other Kenny winning unless Kenny spontaneously combusted mid-match, it really fucking delivered and shocked the hell out of me. I could do without Speedball screaming all of the time though. Man, FTR really kicked the shit out of Copeland. I mean, damn, they beat his fucking ass. Really cool moment for Bowens. Max Caster is the biggest fucking Jannetty. For the health and sake of the futures of Kyle Fletcher and Chicken, please don't let them face each other again. Excellent match. Those two have the weirdest, best, most incredible chemistry that I wouldn't have thought two guys would have. Garcia is the perfect opponent for Cole because they both look like cruiserweights not wrestling like cruiserweights, they're both good wrestlers, and Cole's stuff doesn't look so goofy against someone the size of Garcia. Weirdly enough, between the two, I think Garcia is the more credible guy between the two of them to be a future world champion in AEW. Otherwise, the TNT title feels like such an underwhelming title when two of your other champions are wrestling gods. The Undisputed Kingdom is still dumb. There's plenty I'm forgetting about, but be sure to check out Toni's limerick from the press conference. I about died.

I am rock fucking hard. TRON ARES That NIN music gave me goosebumps.

But also, GIVE US MORE GRAVITY FALLS DAMMIT. And maybe another season of Fiona and Cake.