Robert C

I accidentally found this for myself yesterday when I backed out of Prison Thugs and ended up in the middle of the prison yard. It didn't end well.

Again, sorry to bail out on that survival. I was hoping to get through it, but ran out of time. Somehow the idea of leaving my wife at the airport to deal with her luggage with her neck in its fubar state didn't sound like the right way to start the weekend.

I did that plane delivery mission again with randoms late last night. The guy flying the plane pretty much plowed his way through. There were plenty of active shooters when he delivered it

Had my first experience with a glitched player last night. Was on a public server with jstout minding my own business, when the whole world basically explodes around me. I was in good cover so I crept around the corner and saw an exploded tank surrounded by cops. jstout comes over to me and we see somebody spawn over by the tank. I figure I'll take him out for being a tank user. I unload 300 rounds from the combat machine gun directly into this guy, and jstout does about the same, but he keeps coming like a terminator. His character was blinking the whole time. jstout managed to get him a couple times when he wasn't blinking, but I couldn't do shit to him. I finally just got out and joined a mission rather than stay in a completely pointless fight.

I wound up out there by being stupid, and had to run back to the entrance to get back in. I had a choice between a garbage truck and a helicopter (unarmed), and decided the truck would create more carnage.

Maybe just my opinion, but to me most of the user created deathmatches I've played are just plain awful. Most of the ones I've done seem to be one of two things - matches with just one weapon, like grenades or molotovs - matches that have a bunch of melee weapons, plus jets. Sounds like Odessa is putting a lot of thought and work into his. Wish most other people would do the same.

I never thought about the gamer tag. That's a good idea. Wouldn't have helped me then, though. He was out on the beach, and I was way the hell off across the highway and up a hill. I so wanted to go full on Mel Gibson from Lethal Weapon 1. "Rifle shot from a thousand yards out, through the viewing slit of a moving tank in high wind". I think they've nerfed the kamikaze attack on a tank with a POV thing. I could've sworn that was announced a couple updates ago.

Actually, it was me that sniped it. the problem is I have no idea how I pulled it off, just dumb luck As I mentioned, feel free to shoot me in the head next time we meet.

I met him for the first time last night. Literally, within 30 seconds, he said this. To paraphrase Shawshank Redemption: Young punk. Mr. Rock and Roll. Cocky as hell... I liked him immediately. I remember one night where my alerts menu scrolled "melraz has killed..." for like nine or ten players in a row. The dude is a machine and I am glad he's on our side. If it's the night I'm thinking of, about half of those came up at the same time. We were all wondering what exactly he did to pull that off.

melraz and RUKered were beasts with the helicopters last night. we had about 10 police helicopters on us in one mission coming out of Fort Zancudo. melraz went 8 for 8 on killing them with one shot, then the last two got in too close. I got a little concerned after the third time he rammed one of them, and we were flying upside down, but he pulled it out and got us the hell out of there. Then Dolfan got ambitious and and dialed up Base Invaders on hard. RUKered and melraz grabbed buzzards for air support and went to town on the soldiers. We were able to get the cargobob out of there despite only taking out maybe 1 or 2 guys ourselves. And Dolfan, sorry for mistaking you for our target last night. Feel free to exact your retribution.

That poor bastard that messed with melraz had a bad night. the final kill count must've been about 50 to 15, and most of his kills were from when he dialed up a tank. I got my miraculous sniper shot on the tank, which was cool, but I have no idea where I hit it. Just blind luck. My only real debauchery story was that survival I did a while back, which was just downright creepy. Can't blame JT for that one. He meets actual normal, well adjusted females online, and I run into whoever the hell I got stuck with that night. melraz cracked me up asking if I was from New York. Never had anybody hear my accent and ask if I'm from anywhere but the south.

Minigun is deadly on choppers, or in cases like last night where enemies keep coming right at you no matter how much you shoot. Other than that, I'm no good with it.

I'm changing outfits next time I'm in the game. And that's my M.O., I've talked about it before - I'm the highest ranked player in the game who sucks the most. The other guys I play GTA with joke about it all the time. I'm terrible at Freemode, horrible at deathmatches, I used to be good at racing, but that's gone. I'm not a bad hand in a survival, and can generally hold my own in a mission. I really think my rank puts a target on me - I've been in situations before where I'm pretty sure I get screwed with 'cause it's someone wanting to screw with a high-ranking player. And like I mentioned, there was a Level 9 guy who had me and a Level 70 friend on the ropes somehow before we figured it out. I don't think Melraz is above Level 40 and there's no one I'd rather have on my side in Freemode. The guy dominating me last night was a 90-something. I made my rank constantly doing races when the game first came out, when races payed really well in money and RP. What weapons do you guys use in deathmatches and in Freemode? I love my Advanced Rifle in survivals, but I'm wondering if that automatic shotgun might be the better weapon for player-on-player violence. I pretty much stick to advanced rifle, or maybe the machine gun. I still need a few more levels for the combat machine gun. The shotgun is great, but only at short range. Advanced rifle with the mods can auto-aim at a pretty long range

The team deathmatches with jstout were weird. He was far and away the highest ranked player. I was second and about 70 levels below him. Everybody else was pretty far below me, so you'd think we'd have the advantage on weapons alone. Didn't matter though, because we got our asses kicked 3 times in a row - like 35 to 10 kicked. Didn't help that we'd always get one guy with 12 deaths and no kills. Yeah jstout, you're pretty damn visible. at least I could always tell who you were, even if I couldn't see your ID. Is anybody else losing ammunition after forced + pickups deathmatches? I've lost all my sniper rifle ammo twice now. Cost me 150K so far.

That was my theory as well, since I've been doing a bunch of deathmatches. Apparently I did a little too good a job. Still doesn't keep me from getting my ass shot off in deathmatches.

Forgot to mention. I'm going to have to start dressing up in lots of pink girly stuff, so that Mark doesn't mistake me for a soldier next time we have to hit the army. The earrings and ponytail clearly weren't enough. I had bullets flying all around me and no enemies in sight. I've been using acid washed clothes as half assed urban camouflage. Guess I'll go back to the soccer mom look, albeit with a few more tattoos than before. And that was a hell of a shot Mark made on that Buzzard that was right on top of JT.

I'm guessing that Mixed up with Coke has gotten a glitch like Los Santos Connection used to have, where the second phase of the mission won't trigger. There were ways around the Los Santos Connection bug, so there might be one for the new bug as well. Glad we played that anyway. The sheer volume of fire directed at the backup guys coming at us in the SUVs was amazing. Poor bastards never stood a chance. Ammunation stock should be way up today after the amount of ammo we expended. The suicides when we figured out we couldn't complete the mission were good too, though I was disappointed we couldn't convince the folks at Fort Zancudo to go after us.

I got on about 30 minutes after y'all dropped off and wound up doing a bunch of user created deathmatches. Some of these things other people have done are better in theory than in actual practice. Did one called Grenade Dodgeball last night. Basically stick a bunch of people in the university stadium and have the only weapon be grenades. Fun in theory, really boring in reality. Did another all melee one near Grove St with a huge crowd. For some reason all the projects had securicars on their roofs. Got my ass kicked, but at least I'm getting my strength stats up. I can't tell if there's a glitch, or if people know how to do things I don't, but I swear some people throw one punch and hit me about 6 times.

I'm definitely going to need to blow up some stuff tonight after fighting my way downtown to take my wife to the doctor, then all the way back home. Austin traffic is hideous at the best of times. Throw in everybody panicking about a possible ice storm tonight, and new construction that started today on one of the two major highways through town, and I'm going to be a big bag of hate by the time I get home. I may spend most of my time running over cars in a giant dump truck

Apologies for this now, but I'm bored waiting for a simulation to run at work, so I’ve been amusing myself thinking about these twits. The Tale of the Three Assholes Once there was a lone traveler, and ambassador from the great and noble Death Valley Driver clan, sent out to spread the good news of the clan across the wastelands of Los Santos. Late one night our traveler, exhausted and longing for his bed but determined to persevere in order to get the few more RP needed to level up and get an advance rifle, came upon a group of 3 warriors. These, it seems, came from a crew that will remain nameless, because your chronicler cannot remember it, and so will forever be known by the name of the Three Assholes. Approaching under a flag of truce, they explained that they had been given an important mission from Martin Madrazo, and begged the traveler’s help in completing the “Holed Up” quest on the hard setting. An agreement was quickly reached, and all four proceeded to set out on the mission together. Immediately upon setting out however, these ruffians, apparently anxious to carry their griefing adventures over to missions, did set upon the traveler. Though they were unable to harm him, they did slay Adder, his loyal steed, with a lovely matte blue/black finish, midnight purple rims, and all the upgrades. Upon this assault, our traveler did not retaliate, but rather searched for whatever means of transportation he could acquire. This turned out to be in the rather unlikely form of a station wagon covered in luggage. Setting out on this ungainly new mount, he continued towards the target, willing to overlook this insult for the common good. The Assholes were not through with their assaults however, chasing him in their Entity and attempting all manner of explosive attacks before finally disabling this new vehicle by shooting its rear tires. Their bloodlust apparently sated, they then continued to their target, leaving the now rather irritated traveler to limp along as best he could on 2 tires. The traveler did persevere though, and eventually succeeded in reaching his intended destination, finding his erstwhile companions engaged in combat with members of the Ballas clan. Apparently unwilling to engage in this combat, he instead observed as the Assholes successfully fought their way through the Ballas and reached the intended target. The imperiled Madrazo servant rescued, the assholes then proceeded triumphantly towards his master to receive their just reward. Here, sadly, the tale takes a tragic turn. For it seems that the traveler had not been idle, but instead had been busy lining the only available exit with 5 sticky bombs. Apparently anxious to continue their revelry, the Assholes failed to notice the flashing lights lining both sides of the exit, signifying their impending doom. Suddenly, there was a startling flash of light, and the Assholes were consumed in a great cataclysm of vengeance, along with Juan, their intended rescue. His need for violent retribution sated, the traveler continued on alone, till eventually he leveled up in a survival and went to his well-deserved slumber. If you will, please take a minute to think of poor Juan, slain through no fault of his own, but caught between forces greater than himself. The moral of the story? Don’t be an asshole in a mission where payback is so easily, and enjoyably, accomplished.

I wish I could get into random deathmatches. Guys just run around the city shooting whomever. No one seems interested in starting a deathmatch, I only get random invites to races or jobs and I am reluctant to take them for fear of getting shot when I respawn after the event is done. I don't mind getting capped after a deathmatch because it won't really mess with my K/D Ratio if I gave more than I got. The deathmatches seem to be hit or miss. About half the time I try to join one at random it's either Saving Ryan's Privates, where the last team with a remaining tank wins, or the prison fight, whoever gets the bus wins. If I'm playing by myself, I mostly alternate between deathmatches and missions. Sometimes it takes 3 or 4 tries to find a decent one, but most of the time I will eventually find one

I kept having weird connection problems this weekend. I was able to join up with Dolfan on Friday so I could kill helicopters at the boneyard, and he could drag my rotting corpse to victory in Death from Above and another mission. I kept trying to join jstout but never could connect. Also got a mission invite from JT about in story mode, about 4 hours after he had apparently logged off. Was able to do a bunch of deathmatches with random folks. I'm no longer the world's worst deathmatch player, thanks to getting the advanced rifle, though I'm still no threat to win a standard match. Actually won a team deathmatch that turned into me vs. 5 people. Being outnumbered helped me out, as I could just camp and let them come to me. Got about 6 or 7 different killstreaks from that.

Crap. deleting my post till I can figure out the spoiler tags.

A bunch of them said that for me. However, I was able to get them just by winning that many races overall.

I actually left a bunch of stuff out - surviving Hurricane Katrina and two months on her own afterwards, carrying 13 puppies, Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever infection, heartworms so bad that they got into her lungs and caused visible distention of her heart, and having her kidneys almost shut down. She's covered in bite wounds and was so emaciated that it took a couple months to even guess what breed she was. Basically she's an awful Disney animal movie come to life. The funny thing is that she's a complete wimp in many ways. My other two are out playing in the snow right now, and she's literally in bed under the covers.