DEATH VALLEY DRIVERETTE 9302014! CANCERBERO! RAZIEL!

[DEAN]

DRIVERETTE 9292014

Okay, so a couple of days ruins the 1000 straight days so we begin again!  It's like we will live forever!  Oh shit, looking at the line-up may be a little punishing.  Hopefully it will be a gift to us- to inspire us to look at shitty Japanese indie wrestling in a humourous and interesting way.  Either, we got the lucha match and then we bull through.  Ain't nothing to it but to do it.

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!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  HOMBRE BALA JR/ PEGASSO/ STIGMA vs CANCERBERO/ RAZIEL/ SANGRE AZTECA- CMLL- 5/3/2014:  How many times does Pegasso wrestle at one CMLL taping- or was this in a town later that day two hours down the road?  Eh, it's just Pegasso.  (HA! I kid the perfectly fine high-flying technico.)   The Cancerbero Variations are one of my favorite wads of rudos, and that's why this match survived so many purges- but sometimes you gotta wait out one's Lucha Libre Ennui until you remember why you love Lucha Libre and can get all dialed in to the style.  I'm dialed in and this is a basic CMLL mid-card match with the rudos being bastards and technicos bouncing them around the ring in elaborate rope-running sequences- all using the first fall to show the audience that they are professional standard wrestlers who can do many, many things that people in the audience can't do- which people forget about these days.   And five days later we return.  Ooo, Pegasso isn't afraid to whip out a slick and suave  inside roll-up and then hit a sweet From-The Toprope Frankensteiner.  Sangre Azteca bumps all over for the perfectly fine Hombre Bala Jr.  Luckily, Raziel and Cancerbero cheat and grab Bala and throw him to the ground. Azteca runs from the corner and STOMPS THE HAUNCHES of Hombre Bala Jr.  You, the tender and beloved reader, had been wondering- to yourself, "I don't know, Mr Rasmunson.  I have always loved wrestling from Mexico- what with the masks, and the highflying and the capes and the blood and the beating of midgets (I'm sorry- little people).  It's just not bringing the joy and wonderment that it once brought.  To me."

 

"I know how you feel," I shot back with an air of experience and patience.  "The days when I could watch Galavision wrestling with my sons and lock into the groove of CMLL midcard wrestling is a fading memory.  My soul truly weeps every  Saturday afternoon- another Saturday afternoon without Psycho Circus and Dencis taking it to the mat.  But what if I told you that you could fall in love with Lucha Libre all over again?"

 

"Come on, old man!  Don't taunt me!  My insides are hurting!  You fucking BASTARD! God.  WHAT is WRONG with you?"

 

"Come on, my brother, I would not promise you something and not deliver (probably).  What if I said it involved haunches."

 

"I'm listening."

 

"What if I said it involved Haunch Stomping?"

 

"NO WAY!"

 

"YOU will LOOK at the GLORY of HAUNCH-STOMPING!"

 

"HOLY FUCK! I watched the YouTube match that you were reviewing and there was haunches being STOMPED! HOLY FUCK YES!"

 

"Fuck yes indeed."  We turn from each other in a manly way, our verile gazes swinging widely to the multitude of ladies trying to capture our eye(s).  We are plunged in the cleansing flood of haunch stomping.  I am brand new.  You are brand new.

 

It wasn't really that great of a spot.  Anyway, Raziel mauls Stigma and Cancerbero crushes  Pegasso with a lariat to the back of the head and the back-kicking and then TOPROPE HAUNCH-STOMPING!  FOR THE PIN!  Hell yes!   The crowd enjoys the rudo variations on crashing into the haunches of the technicos and the crowd shows its appreciation by screaming expletives at the technicos, it appears. Segunda Caida begins with our rudos just smacking the fuck out of the technicos.  It's pretty great.  Cancerbero Squads are really great at beating the shit out of folks.  It's why you watch the Lucha Libre.  Beat some heat on those good-lookin' Mexican fellas.  Pegasso eventually fights through getting the hell smacked out of him and gets in a quick roll up on the rudo captain and we have a Second Fall over pretty quickly.  Stigma and Bala hit just TRULY spectacular highspots to set it all up.  This match is pretty great from both ends of the good-evil spectrum.   Third fall is rudos bumping and not being to handle the technically superior offence of the technicos!  Pegasso hits the SUPER SWEET Angel Azteca Sideway Sliding armdrag and I'm really digging this match.     Man, Azteca will take a Rolling DDT straight to the face like a KING.    Raziel and Pegasso both bump enormously to the floor but crawl back in to make sure Stigma doesn't stay in the ring and botch anymore spots.  Cancerbero procures the Dos Caras Sharpshooter variation and the rudos accept the adoration of the crowd.  As God intended.  Quality Lucha Libre.

 

    

 

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ MR TOMO vs RASCAL FUJIWARA- PRO WRESTLING SHI-EN- 6/1/2014:  I should just review all 46 PW Shi-En matches that sit in my Watch Later list.  I feel sorry for them- sitting there month after month, growing tired and scared, wondering if they will ever be watched.  Today is your lucky day, one match from the stack!  Do your mat magic, Mr Tomo!   Actually!  WAIT! I've suddenly got shit to do! Tomorrow!

 

TOMORROW:  The exciting beginning and conclusion of the  MR TOMO vs RASCAL FUJIWARA- PRO WRESTLING SHI-EN- 6/1/2014 review!