Robert C

Good Lord, but those leaderboards are goofy. And Disturbing. Somebody called wraith4912.1 has purchased 10000 dances, and visited the ladies of the evening 3100 times. This is one case where I really hope the guy hacked his save file.

somebody named mikefizz has apparently killed me 53 times, and I've taken out Ninjadud200 45 times. I feel good about taking out a dud of a ninja, but I'm gonna have to hunt down this mikefizz asshole. Funny thing - I have no memory of either of these people. I'm guessing they're both from that one stupid deathmatch I did that was a bunch of people in a tiny, enclosed space with no cover and no kill limit.

Pretty sure Phil will never get into a car with me after my crash during Titan of a Job. I hit a lamp post and we did 5 or 6 somersaults in my Tursimo before we finally came to a stop, while Dan was cheering us on to hit one more flip, right into the approaching gas station. Next time I'm guessing his response will be "No thanks, I'll walk."

A lot of people like me bought almost everything while the free money was around. I've bought a few expensive things since, such as the Turismo, but there hasn't been much to spend money on. That's why I've wound up with a bunch.

Wonder what the interest rates are at the First National Bank of Stout. I can do 20% down, so I don't wanna pay subprime rates. They could add a loanshark element to the game. Pay me tomorrow, or expect a visit from melraz.

Now you need to start using pistols in all-weapons-allowed deathmatches just to work on your tint for the pistol. C'mon, you know you wanna. Can you get tints for the crowbar? Golf club? I've got about 150 unarmed kills. Maybe I can get blue fists of doom.

Phil beat me to it on those stupid DMs. I played way too much Friday and Saturday. I'm up about $2.2M, and 10-12 levels, from where I was on Thursday. Got more than $6M sitting in the bank waiting for the update. I kept spawning into freemode out of missions, mainly Rooftop Rumble, with occasionally comical results. So many people were spamming Rooftop Rumble that there were supers literally stacked on top of each other outside Martin's place. I took a few pictures of that. Also, every guy I shot dropped $500. I thought that was nice of them. Got 2 more car bomb kills, so I'm up to gold on that now, and I finally unlocked LSPD tint for the heavy sniper. I've got that on every gun I'm even remotely likely to use, so I think I'm done with tints.

Played a fair amount off and on last night between breaks for work and other stuff, mostly freemode or DMs with randoms. Almost got the LSPD tint unlocked for the heavy sniper, which will be the last weapon I ever unlock that tint. Got a bunch of cheap kills taking guys out that were involved in firefights with others. I also finally played Paintball in a match with weapons locked. That was bad, even with it set to teams. I actually like that match if I have all my weapons and it's teams. Got past halfway on the Trust No One tattoo after shooting two different guys out of Simeon cars and blowing up either them or somebody else who came for the car with the ignition bomb. Watching them jump into the car while I'm respawning is one of the funniest things in the game. First guy had a 7K bounty on him, so I actually made a profit on that one. mis and I ran into the worst little bitch in the game in freemode. There was a level 300+ guy with a 9K bounty up by the movie theater. I was thinking tanks from where he was, but we went for a look anyway. He turned out to be in a white limo. mis "put a sticky bomb on that thing" * sound of explosion * me "just did" The guy did manage a kill on me before I could get out of there, due to a lucky spawn. Next thing I know, he rolled up in a tank, after we had all of one kill on him. Cops and mis made short work of the tank, and the guy immediately slapped it in passive mode. Then he called a mugger and mercs on me, and put a bounty on mis. I took out the mercs and mugger, but the cops got me a couple times, while mis managed to run the guy over. Then I somehow got the guy in the car with me, and we killed him a few more times each before he went into passive again. I've never seen anybody throw that much of a fit over being killed one time, especially with a bounty on them. The only thing he didn't do was the call Lester to go invisible deal. It was like the guy had never been killed in freemode before.

I was wondering why you popped up in my freemode session for a couple minutes in the middle of the night.

I figure that's just the DVDR crew bonus - a token of respect from the LSPD. Up late checking on sims for work, so I was on at midnight PST. At that point, everything suddenly started paying double money, and I think extra RP as well. Hadn't heard anything about that beforehand - was this some sort of suprise deal? Tried out Rooftop Rumble real quick just to check - got 37500 for about five minutes work.

They oughta find a way to design it as a crew mission - your crew has to claim a spot to use as their HQ - kind of like how you claimed the club as your HQ for the bank heist in Vice City.

That's actually what I like about it. It's gotten me killed a few times, but I've picked up quite a few kills, and even a few bounty collections, within a few seconds of spawning. My habit of selling a car at the downtown LSC before logging off means that I frequently end up spawning in interesting situations when I start up again. Doesn't always end well, but I've got to the point now where I can usually hold my own. Only got on very briefly, but did get to do one ridiculous DM. 3 on 2, with my team having the 3. It was on the Mansion map, which is one of my favorites, because I know one really good spot. Wound up with 10 kills and no deaths. Final score was us losing 10 to 16. My two teammates combined for 0 kills and 16 deaths. Score one for incompetence.

In the right circumstances, it's a blast. I'm currently what would be called a "Freemode Wimp," in that I don't set a pinky toe in Freemode until I've got a decent amount of crew at my side, but there's something fun about watching three or four green-outlined dots closing in on a white dot while the music from "Jaws" plays in my head. Before having server troubles and getting booted into our own rooms, Mel, Mis and I spent a few minutes yesterday showing some fellow the back of our hands. He fluke killed Mel a couple of times and never got me or Mis. It was one of those chronic problems while playing with the crew - I'd have him lined up in my sniper scope, getting ready to pull the trigger, when someone else would take him out. Am I being a bully? Sure, I guess, but man, I've been bullied in this game to the point of sheer absurdity. It feels good to be on the other end of it once in a while. And we're judicious - I've heard of players who target the lower-level guys in a room. We go after anyone with one of those really high levels, just to try to show them cheaters don't win. Oh, and J.T., apparently the poster's an idiot and I'm an idiot for quoting him. Apparently there's still a way for people to get into your garage with a weapon, but I can't even find any new mentions/YouTube videos of the way to do that post-1.12. I'm gonna quit posting heads ups about new glitches until I actually see a YouTube video about it. I think you can shoot inside your apartment with a glitch and you can also shoot inside someone else's apartment, but you have to be invited. Do people still invite people to their apartments these days? Rockstar should make "crew clubhouses," a buyable gathering place for crews online, with a garage for everyone to park their cars in and stupid ways for crews to kill time like maybe darts and arm wrestling, maybe a firing range. I can't count the number of times I've watched some white dot bastard's head explode through a sniper scope because melraz was faster than me. Apartment glitches are the least annoying type of glitches to me because I never go there. I've got it set to spawn at my last location, and maybe go to my apartment once a week. Parking garage glitchers can go die in a hole.

That was one of my highlights of GTA online. right there with melraz's indignation after I got him with the sticky bombed tanker truck. I generally give thumbs up to user created races, unless they're just awful. The only thumbs down I can remember was that one where you have to drive over shipping containers placed up in the air. It may be the same one that stout and mis played today. Piss on that. I'm a much harder grader on user created DMs. They're much easier to get wrong than races, at least to me. I've seen very few user created DMs that I actually liked. I like Mark's, particularly if I can get a sniper rifle. I think Paradise Alley is user created, and that's one of my favorites. Tanks in user DMs are an automated thumbs down for me.

JT and I had a pretty nice tumbling mirror sequence going on in the middle of the Commune DM last night, till somebody had to ruin the fun by shooting me in the back of the head. It looked like we were doing some sort of rhythmic gymnastics team event, except we had replaced the ribbons and hoops with shotguns.

Dan and I were talking about making an underwater DM after we got into a shootout with somebody inside a shallow lake in freemode. I've been to lazy to do it. Not sure if Dan has done anything. There are a couple of places you could do it.

I remember that one. moongirl was on our team, driving like a mad woman to avoid the buzzard that one of the randoms had called in. I think that was Crooked Cop

I forgot about duckonquack. That was good. wombatjuice was nice as well. The Lance Armstrong thing has me thinking there ought to be an exception to the don't shoot bicyclists rule - any bicyclist in a yellow shirt should be shot on sight. That may only apply to me though, since we're inundated with Armstrong shit here, and half the cyclists on the roads think they're him.

Shit, I forgot the best username ever last night. poopindatoilet. He and his buddy were kicking my ass pulling the reverse trick in an Entity till I managed to get an RPG into it. Then melraz killed them a bunch, and I got a few in as well. he sent us both a gg text before taking off, and both of us complimented him on his awesome username. We parted with a feeling of mutual respect - a brotherhood of warriors separated by fate and crew as we traveled the urban wastelands of LS.

Well, nobody was coming after us, so I thought I'd drum up a little interest. I'm a good boy though. I still get to the $2000 bonuses that tel me so. This sums up the "Randoms vs. Robert" experience. I've been known to blow up a car or two, but I'm an amateur compared to Dr. Deathmatch. I wish I had the common sense to pull off putting a sticky bomb on a car and blowing it up when the player gets back in it, but I never remember to do that. I usually just like blowing up the shiny too much. My 11-hour workday made me miss all the fun. Edit: Mel, what level was this dood? So you never talked to him? Sounds like a kid. Funny thing was, melraz killed him a shitload more times than I did, and in hilarious ways too. multiple iterations of the old lure guy into a car, jump out, shoot him trick. Him sticky bombing the guy's getaway plane was the best though.

I got my LSPD tint for the assault MG while we were tangling with that last bunch after I got back online. I suggested some reverse psychology to melraz with one guy that he'd been fucking with forever and killing in every horrible way imaginable. He sent the guy a request for positive feedback. I was figuring that would have the opposite effect, and the guy would finally give melraz his beloved negative rep, but it backfired - instead the guy decided melraz was his big brother or something. My favorite part was when he started complaining to melraz about me: random guy: your friend keeps killing me melraz: well, go kill him back random guy: he blew up my car (which I technically hadn't done yet, though there was a sticky on the back of it) melraz: go get another one random guy: he blew up all of them Though it is way easier to set personal bests when it is a straight race Last night was probably the closest I have ever come to joining the nonsense in freemode. I was signing off and I hear melraz yell "FUCK YOU CHASEY BOY!!! COME GET SOME YOU BASTARD!!!!" and I was like "aww... hell..." and then JT goes "Guess I am not signing off..." Not that I would have been very helpful due to all the tears in my eyes from all the laughing I was doing I was cracking up listening to melraz' commentary. I think he had at least half a dozen kills while I was still stuck in the cloud. I think he pretty much quoted Hudson's final line from Aliens - "Come on! Come on! Come and get it, baby! Come on! I don't got all day! Come on! Come on! Come on you bastard! Come on, you too! Oh, you want some of this? Fuck you! "

Yeah, I've done that DM twice now. There are actually a bunch of them - all almost identical and all apparently made by the same guy, Noshi or something similar. If you kick off a random DM now, you've probably got about a 25% chance of ending up in one of these. I always leave them immediately, but one time I couldn't leave before the match started, so I stuck around long enough to see what was what. For those that haven't seen them, they maps are small, enclosed areas that are rendered inescapable by stacked shipping containers and barbed wire fences. The forced weapon is a melee weapon, and there are no pickups. There is a buzzard that you can reach by climbing, and whoever manages to get into that can kill everybody else at will with impunity. I stuck around for about a minute and then kicked back XBOX home. I don't think some folks know how it's supposed to work, though. I got stuck into one over the weekend where all weapons were enabled. That becomes a completely different beast. That's the one I mentioned earlier today where I had more than 100 kills in 20 minutes, and only came in third.

You will never see a smoother theft of a cargobob from Fort Zancudo. Yeah, I've done a few of those, and can't remember one ever going that well. Of course, I screwed us up for it by getting my ass shot off twice in quick succession when we got to the docks. I think maybe I should have waited to start launching rockets till I hit the yellow circle. That might've kept the cops off of us. Before Docks to Stocks came along, JT, Dolfan and I declared "The park is ours" in Little Seoul, and proceeded to wipe out everybody that had spawned there after a DM. There was nobody even close by the time we were done. Suckers need to develop a healthy fear of the heavy sniper. Found a couple servers with big groups in one place on public servers this weekend, and for some reason I was rocking on the sniper rifle. Most of the map was down at the airport for the first one. I'd sniped half a dozen guys before I realized that the server was basically one crew plus me. I kicked up a hornet's nest with that one, but still wound up about even. Weird thing was that sticky bombs wouldn't explode on that server. I tried 3 and none went off. They worked fine on others. Second big group was all down by the beach, apparently just hanging out. I probably wound up with about 40 sniper kills on them. One guy was in passive, but couldn't seem to remember that passive doesn't work if you're in a vehicle. Another one kept trying to run me down in his Banshee. I shot him out of it 3 or 4 times, then set off the sticky on the back when he decided to make a run for it. Best kill though was sniping 2 guys off of a jetski with one heavy sniper round. I played the world's most ridiculous DM as well. 20 minutes, 100+ kills. And I came in 3rd out of 7 people. It was basically spawn, shoot, die, repeat.

If somebody wants to build up their strength, easiest way is just to do unarmed only DMs. There are a shit ton of them out there - about half the random ones I get end up being those. They're boring of course, but you can increase your strength really quickly,

I'm the same way about my Mesa. I almost never use it. I just like knowing it's there.