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caley

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Everything posted by caley

  1. Counterpoint: No one likes vegans. (This is coming from a 25 year vegetarian who is just one proper vegan cheese that actually melts (Unlike everything out there now) so I can continue eating pizza away from being vegan, myself!)
  2. The image of Scott Steiner trying to read and understand the WSJ brings me great joy. I know Jarrett had good matches in WCW but it's all overshadowed in my brain by his dreadful promos and skits like this. So the nWo's endgame was to beat up Arn Anderson and NOT to win the tag titles?! Then why did they enter the tournament?! I remember at this point in my WCW fandom being very enthused by the Flair/Crowbar tag titles win because I was completely over the Outsiders and the belts had been passed around amongst mediocre teams for MONTHS at this point. At least Crowbar was pretty good and the team, itself, was somewhat new!
  3. I have no evidence of this but I bet, even with the inclusion of Evan Karagias, the WCW boy band was probably better than the Indy one and I base that largely on Jimmy Hart's involvement
  4. Am I first? It wasn't his idea. Pretty sure it was an Indy gimmick that also probably would have worked a little better because they replaced one of the original members with Karagias and then signed the other two. Edit: The group was called The Badstreet Boys and consisted of Moore, Helms, Christian York and Joey Matthews (Mercury) and somehow WCW signed all of them but only out Helms and Moore in 3 Count!
  5. Boy do I NOT remember this at all. I read this as "Raven's gear" and got a good chuckle at the visual of Smiley in a leather jacket screaming away. But but but people who are watching this at home would see that it was really Russo's idea AND the people in the crowd so why would a condition of his deal be to go lie about something already knows isnt...never mind You just KNOW if this was modern day, Karagias would get his own Russo-created shirt that said something "Chilling Ultra Cool Karagias" and the joke would be that he didn't know it spelled out "CUCK" but then, in true Russo fashion, it would be mentioned 6-7 times in every segment in case someone didn't get how clever he was. I wonder why he decided to keep his face hidden to begin with? He clearly likes the spotlight but didn't want his face in TV?! *** Imagine trying to explain this show to a non-viewer. "Well the matches are all predetermined but you suspend your disbelief: like watching a movie. But this segment the wrestlers are insisting is real is still fake but now is labeling the other segments as fake. So you're supposed to think that this segment is really real while the other segment is fake real. But it's all fake but it...forget it"
  6. You know in any other moment in wrestling history, this sentence would make no sense. But in Russo WCW, it's not even in a Top 5 weird sentences about a wrestling show. What makes this whole run so WEIRD is that the Misfits were a punk band of very LITTLE mainstream cred. Like, they were never especially succesful on charts, no big crossover hits, pretty much their biggest mainstream cache is their logo and the fact Danzig was the singer for a while. I have a sneaking suspicion that ICP wanted more money or had to go on tour, and someone (Vamp, himself?) went to bat for the Misfits being a better, cheaper substitute, but there is no real justification for them getting this much TV time and what was still a fairly popular show.
  7. Imagining an alternate reality ECW where the lights go out, the crowd goes wild, the lights come on and Jim Duggan's standing in the ring with his 2x4 yelling "Hoooooo!" to a deafening pop. It's weird because I was thinking it was a McMahon thing that Russo inherited McMahon didn't do that so much early on, Austin and Rock often stood tall. It wasn't really until after Cena that he seemed to rarely let the faces stand tall. It was especially egregious after Lesnars return. I remember a couple times thinking "Wow if (random midcarder) stands up to Lesnar here, even if he gets destroyed after, it will be such a pop...oh no he's going to try to run...and still get destroyed".
  8. Woof. What a terribly Russoriffic "joke". I'm amazed he never had a wrestler named Kay Fabe. And if he did, I don't wanna know about it.
  9. That's amazing! My favourite unintentional AI vaginal reference was when my very straightlaced and completely modern respectful male friend asked his TV remote for something innocuous (It wasn't Food Network but in the same vein) and his wife walked in as the TV displayed the message "You asked for p---y and this system can't handle commands with that type of language" as he fell all over himself to plead with her that he had not just asked the remote for that!
  10. I like that Kidman couldn't finish the match, rather sacrificing his title to go stop this nonsense. Somewhere there's an alternate reality where Buff did actually lead the new generation of stars and there's a whole roster of over-tanned, calf-implanted, barely mobile unfunny smirking good guys posing and delivering terrible matches. And it's only slightly worse than [insert the name of your most hated wrestling fed here] WCW: We hate our belts! I don't specifically remember much of Maestro's WCW run, but I still wouldn't hold my breath for closure on this one. This would be much funnier if Duggan had barged onto the piano bench, pounded at the keys, but they superimposed actual good piano-playing over top of it. I was still retroactively excited over who was in the limo, reading this today, somehow and then... laughed really hard reading this line, knowing your outright hatred of late-90s Piper and then... read this and laughed again. Not at the joke, which is poor. But at Piper's beyond-closeted obsession with drag. Reading these, he brings it up ALL the time. It's too bad he's not still alive because someone could just say "Just put the makeup on, wear the dress and stop being so repressed, Hot Rod!" It's like the Alan Partridge (Dated TV reference again!) episode where he keeps talking about "lady boys" and how "Disgusting" it is and how he's not attracted to them, it's just "Confusing" and at the end he finally gives up and asks the front desk to put the pornography on TV for him. Anytime someone brings something up this much, he's obviously harboring some hidden feelings. This sounds like one of the worst finishes ever.
  11. There is a Nitro or Thunder off in the future where Vito is given mic time to big himself up and my brother and I used to cue it up and watch repeatedly because he was trying to get a zillion catchphrases over "I'm the Pavarotti of shots to the body and my t feels really...good!" and " I'm the goomba of ooh aah! "
  12. I just thought it was so funny that a dude got hit with a fish (Which I do NOT remember) but you've become so desensitized to Russo's nonsense that you're just like "Disco hits Iaukea with the fish, then lands a Chartbuster and storms away{ as if he'd just hit him with a clothesline. I think it'd probably be like if you went back and watched 2004 WWE what with Eugene, Gene Snitsky, the Lita-Kane wedding, the murder of Paul Bearer, etc. that by the time you got to the Diva Search and Christy Hemme proclaiming that her "butt was hungry" or calling Carmella DeCesare a "c-- guzzling guttersl-t" you'd basically be like "Yeah, that tracks." And, hmm, i thought I'd dreamt Backstage Assault...I don't remember if I ever played it.
  13. I'm sorry...what!?! It was Russo who wanted to do away with the ring, wasn't it? I mean, I know McMahon also opined on this a few times with a sigh about how if they got rid of the ring and the word 'wrestling', more people would see just how entertaining they were which is hilarious because if they got rid of the ring and just became a soap opera with fighting, they would lose their fighting audience who would just watch action movies with bigger budgets and effects and for people into the soap opera side, they'd watch any dramatic series with better acting. Anyways, can you imagine a Vince Russo show without a ring?! Just an endless string of sketches with two guys running into each other backstage and getting into scuffles. "Hey did you just cut in front of me for coffee?!" " If you don't like me, bite me! " [scuffle, then cut to] "Hey did you just eat the last brownie?!" "Listen up, also nuts!" [Scuffle]
  14. I will always remember him for this. https://www.reddit.com/r/SquaredCircle/comments/ou2934/ecw_on_tnn_was_wild/ Watching this, I legitimately thought he might be dead.
  15. Oh God, I forgot that they were named after the WWE "Stooges"! IIRC there was one funny thing Oklahoma said, which was after aping JR's repetition gimmick ("Austin! Austin!"), someone picked up the pinata stick and he yelled "Stick! Stick!" which was the only part of this that was remotely entertaining. There's an MST3k where they make light of some bad comedy by saying something like "It's not really comedy, more like comedy loaf. Until actual humor appears, please accept this substitute." which is exactly what this sounds like. i'm actually surprised they didn't show that! Oh...well, he still didn't yell "Hooooo!", I guess. Trying to quote some of this dialogue, I was shocked at just how early in the show some of this seemed to be. Like, reading this recap feels like the show takes FOREVER, so I can't even fathom how long it feels WATCHING it back.
  16. Ah, I had never heard this! I knew he was incompetent (I think Bret Hart made an allegation that he'd had a jacket stolen because Delliinger fell asleep on the job) and that he used to be a cop (Though that might go hand in hand with the above allegations...) but never that other part!
  17. Kinda tells you how bad the Shane Twins must have been to not go further than they did. Of course, wrestling as penises can shorten your careers
  18. This reminds me of one of my favourite Sid'isms (No not the "I have half the mind that you do!" one), but on that great Monday Night Raw that basically kicked off the Attitude era (Bret has a cage match against Sid for the world title a week before WM; Austin, Hart's WM opponent, interferes liberally to HELP Bret because doing so would make their WM match a World Title match where Sid's WM opponent the Undertaker comes down to help him to preserve their title match; it's this rare incident of completely logical booking and motivation that you don't see too often) where after the match Bret accuses everyone of screwing him, says that everyone know he's the real champ even Sid, and Sid comes out and gets caught on the microphone yelling "I don't know shit, Bret!" It says something about this era that a guy gets hit by a car and I don't remember even a glimmer of it. Is he? I know nothing of this! This reminds me of when Nitro came to our little town (I'm still baffled how/why that happened...we got a Smackdown a few years later too, then nothing for the last 15-20 years...) and the show started with a Vince Russo promo where he berated the crowd and talked about "Your hero Goldberg!" and my friend (Who watched wrestling but not as religiously as I did) looked at me and said "Wait, are we supposed to like him again?!" and I was baffled as I'd read the PPV results from the night before and he seemed to have turned heel. I wonder if this was a little inside-joke on Hammer as Mick Foley said in his book that Hammer was a nice guy but was a "natural heat magnet" with the other wrestlers by making comments like "I came here to save this company" Also next time I have a job interview, I'm going to use this quote Serious question here: Were the Harris Twins ever over?! I was watching some random ECW shows a while back and they were hyping up Tommy Dreamer (or some other naive babyface) having back-up and he brought out the Harrises and the crowd was rather mild like "Oh, were they gone?" and then they turned on him and the crowd remained rather non-plussed and I think about all the places they wrestled and how high up the card they have ended up (I think one ends up in a world title 3-way at some point next year...just to warn you) and how no one ever really seems to care one way or the other. I feel like there's at least one Montreal Screwjob ending coming up in WCW under Russo, as well, isnt there? Or maybe that was Vinnie Ru bringing it back in TNA?
  19. I vaguely remember them using it but iirc it was more of a vehicle to get Stacy Keibler over than anything else I watched a clip of Go!dberg-Nash the other day and forgot how very much Russo wanted to remind the fans that this is fake but THIS might be real! Terrible stuff.
  20. I don't remember this match at all, but it sounds awesome from the write-up. I don't remember this and it sounds hilarious with Schiavones's sad voice I definitely do NOT remember this. DDP, at this point, often felt to me like a guy who had been bypassed by late 90s slang and went up and asked the younger guys what the popular slang was and they intentionally told him the wrong thing and snickered backstage watching him: "Oh yeah, whack it and jack it, that means to challenge somebody to a fight!" "Okay, cool thanks, bro!"
  21. It's either A) He just wants to keep boarding wrestlers or B) He's a TERRIBLE negotiator. By the time Jericho signs with WWF (for a $450,000 downside), Bischoffs offer to Jericho is over double that! But also when Jericho first negotiated with Bischoff he asked for $100k annually and Bischoff countered with $130k, then said he wanted Jericho to move to Atlanta so he'd thrown in an extra $40k to cover that. That's just about the worst negotiating I've ever heard especially because at that point Jericho was just a good-looking athletic guy with basically no promo ability. WWF didn't even want him so Bischoff was negotiating against nobody and still have him $70,000 more than he was asking for!
  22. I'v been flipping through Jericho's book again and laughed really hard at the part where Jericho goes back on his word and tells Bischoff he's not re-signing (Right after the Goldberg angle gets kiboshed) and after initially cursing him out and promising to make life hard on Jericho, Bischoff decides on a different tact and starts being nice to Jericho and gets others to ask him to reconsider, including DDP, Kevin Nash and...Jason Hervey...which of course reminded me of this thread!
  23. I just have to say this thread has become part of my morning routine: (weather permitting), I like to take a cup of coffee, some sort of breakfast deal (Bagel, Costco chocolate muffin, even once a bowl of watermelon), out to the patio with my tablet and hope to read one of these reviews before the sun gets above the treeline and incinerates me. So thanks again for this thread!
  24. If people have to defend their lives, Albert Brooks-style, there are going to be a lot of producers with a lot to answer for! Last night I was rewatching an episode of Hells Kitchen and during the teaser at the end, they showed two women fighting and the voiceover said something along the lines of "But will their fighting awaken a slumbering giant" and cut to one of the larger ladies in bed and added kind of a rumbling/hellbeast growling noise to the scene. Terrible influence that I am, I not only got my younger brother into wrestling but my wonderful sister into it, for a while, too. I think this may have been the episode where she quit. But for years afterward, whenever any of us experienced a minor frustration, it would often result in us raising our arms to the heavens and shouting "GOLDBERG!"
  25. Um I believe you mean 'Jiggly Jiggly Jewish space lazers'! I was just reading the part where Bischoff brought Jericho in and said he saw him as becoming their version of Shawn Michaels then how he was really excited to feud him with Brad Armstrong. Apparently Armstrong was rejected for debuting (or re-debuting) wtestlers.
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