Dolfan in NYC

Her green plastic watering can, for her fake Chinese rubber plant, in the fake plastic earth.... And I'm back from vacation. Let's see what happened... hmm... needle 2 face... Marina Shafir is back for some reason... okay seems normal enough... She lives with a broken man, a cracked polystyrene man... Who just crumbles and burns... And as everyone expected, Bryan Danielson remained AEW Champion by defeating "Suitable Opponent" Jack Perry. Ooooh, what's this about a near cash-in by Christian Cage? Says it was fended off... hmm... oh wait... He used to do surgery for girls in the eighties... But gravity always wins. And it wears him out.... ...It wears him out... It wears him out... It wears... Well, so much for that.... This week, we need to do some more build before Grand Slam. But it wears me out... (Dolfan's scorching hot music take of the week... this is a better song than "Paranoid Android" or "Creep".) Have a good week!

Tua has been put on the IR. He'll miss at least 4 games (probably closer to 6)

Training camps opening very soon. Also, Broward County and the STANLEY CUP CHAMPION~ Florida Panthers have reached an agreement to stay in South Florida through at least 2043.

Without having watched a second of the Brothers trailer, it looks like they are remaking Twins without any of the IP rights.

If you ever want to feel claustrophobic, just read the last sentence of the USCG's report on the Titan submersible implosion: ...why am I itchy.

When Kofi "accidentally" eliminates him in January, what Xavier does is going to make Hangman & Swerve say "hey, that's a bit much."

The Mets have also now painted a single seat in the bleachers purple and saying it's Grimace's seat. I'm not saying I want them all to drink Grimace Shakes... but I'm not not saying that either.

I'd like to thanks the Iggy's for that final pick. I won by 2.9 with my opponent having Jake Elliott

Stop making people up Mark. I'm too tired.

Seriously though, the names I'd seen being batted around was Bethard and Tannehill and phew, at least we got someone who won't be killed by the wet tissue paper thin offensive line this stupid team has.

That's odd. I wonder what happened? I've been drunk on rum for the last week.

I'm sure you are Kurt.

Well, for the first time in 20 years(!) the WWE presents Bad Blood! To give you some idea of how long ago that was... Chris Jericho wrestled Tyson Tomko on that show! Can you imagine how funny it would be to see Chris Jericho wrestling today?? THE CARD~! FOR THE WOMEN'S WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP - Liv Morgan (c) vs. Rhea Ripley FOR THE WWE WOMEN'S CHAMPIONSHIP - Nia Jax (c) vs. TBD HELL IN A CELL MATCH - CM Punk vs. Drew McIntyre Cody Rhodes & Roman Reigns vs. The Bloodline (Sikoa / Fatu) Damian Priest vs. Finn Bálor

Next up Cal! Will the nerds from Berkley take the Noles to the woodshed too? (Also, in other fun news, Northern Illinois is now #23.)

I'm so jetlagged you guys. (Seriously though, how has no one -- mid 2000's HHH I'm looking at you -- ever used this as a huge entrance for their Mania match?) Enjoy the week!

Founding member of the Jackson 5, Tito Jackson has died. He was 70.

Leo Messi finally came back from rolling his ankle during the CA Final last night. He clearly decided that Suarez had far too large a lead in scoring, so he got 2 goals and an assist leading the Herons to a 3-1 win over Philadelphia

Nick Saban was so mad when he saw this he ordered Pat McAfee to start running wind sprints.

"How 0-3 FSU Can Still Make The Playoffs"

MCMG have reportedly signed with WWE. Also, Def Rebel will not have their contract renewed. WWE is apparently going to go with mainstream artists from now on. So when Seth comes out to Killswitch Engage on the first Netflix Raw, try to look surprised.

Apparently the NFL will not put Deshaun on the restricted list because technically he's not being accused criminally.

Kyle Schwarber just hit his 14th leadoff HR, setting a new Major League record

The USMNT is hiring Mauricio Pocchetino as the new team coach.