assfax
-
Posts
745 -
Joined
-
Last visited
Posts posted by assfax
-
-
I know I've spent sixty bucks more frivolously on shit I won't enjoy anywhere near as much. If it's anything like that old classics on demand where I can watch every Raw chronologically and watch all the superstars and wrestling challenge shit at will this will be the greatest bicep curl watchin' station of all eternity.
L.A. GORE LIVES
-
Assassin's Creed 4 is just waiting for me to build a new PC with an actual new CPU. Or maybe I'll just wait 'til it's 15 bucks brand new for Wii U. I know I'm getting a PS4 but I have absolutely no motivation to get one yet. Remember a week ago when I was bitchin' about Vita? Well, some fucker put up a used system with a 16gig card with free overnight shipping on ebay last week for a buck fifty. Needless to say some dumbass bought it on a whim and then got PS+, Symphony of the Night, Spelunky and this new skateboard game. Fuck any responsible adults reading this. I want to get that PSP Final Fantasy Tactics remake but it's probably due to go on sale in February. Biding my time. Or who the hell am I kidding? I have a four day weekend and I still won't beat either Last of Us, Vita Uncharted or GTAV. Face it, being snuggled 'neath a blanket and lackadaisically watching films while getting bombed is the true way.
-
3
-
-
Just wait five months and the fucker will be free to play.
-
Aliens landing in my backyard and they stole it off the god damned internet.
-
Mirage Men: It definitely falls into what I would call a modern documentary formula. It's a UFO thing so it by nature will neither raise, nor answer anything conclusively. Still drank whisky and watched it. I'm gonna watch this Chinese Coffee movie that's been just'a'sittin' upon my computer.
-
-
The virtual console stuff barely went down a dollar and a half on those character sales. They didn't really even include every game available for each series. Once I got a classic controller, I ended up getting way more shit on the old Wii eshop. Link to the past was free, Mario RPG I got right before amazon started charging taxes, then I got stupid and got Paper Mario and Mario 64. It's still insane that I can't just use the gamepad as a classic controller for those games. I got toki tori 1 and 2 relatively cheap (for the eshop). Then, Crimson Shroud and Steamworld Dig were cheap and I got those on 3DS. Mainly though, I need to get an external HDD for my Wii U. I only want to get like 250 gigs but those are more expensive than higher capacity drives. If I understand it correctly the Wii U will format the HDD and lock it down so you can't partition off most of the drive without a complete reformat. Even then it doesn't seem that great since shit will still be way more expensive digitally. Early titles like ZombiU are discounted but an actual physical copy is still way cheaper. On the other side of the coin, I'd like to get a Vita because there's a ton of old PS1 games and different shit at good prices. Then I look at how much the goddamned memory card costs. Bottom line: Fuck the police.
-
3
-
-
Upon further reflection, Dark Mod went standalone a few months back so that has got to be my official game of the year.
-
Metroid Prime 3. Things that are dumb: when you have to do one of those long, involved, Ghostbuster containment unit routines for a simple switch. Also don't like how unreliable the grapple-whip lock on was on that hectic part where you're trying to blow up an AA gun and all these asshole flying guys come in and tip the shit back. The z-targeting also loves to decouple from the goddamned badguy you're trying to keep in view. There also really needs to be a quicker way to switch to the scan visor. Holy shit that's getting tedious. Especially if you are investigating shit and then the big giant head pipes in with some bullshit that makes you wrench your thumb all the way down to hit the tiny button near your wrist. Other than that, fucking great. Does seem like I end up just rapid firing because the charge shot is only worth it if both you and the target aren't moving. First time an enemy gives you a phazon overload seems like a cheap game over when you didn't know what the hell was happening. AND there's no way that robotic guild navigator isn't going to be super goddamned evil and fuck you over.
-
Punisher VS Robocop. Frank shoots Robocop in the mouth.
-
Watched The Crossing Guard. At first I was kinda hating those early scenes with Nicholson and Huston. Just seemed like a really bad movie. The more fucked up he got the better. This was still the David Morse show.
Watched China O'Brien a few weeks back. As soon as you see that skeezy Christopher Lloyd deputy you know the motherfucker is evil. Rothrock is kicking ass on the wildside in mom jeans. I wanna see her naked and have stinky sex along with the 70s show mom.
Maybe I already said something but I also watched True Confessions and The Mission. Good shit.
-
Alright, only thing I can knock Link Between Worlds on is that the last dungeon was short and just reused some bosses. Didn't feel very last level-ish. Really should've had sections for all the items.
Also, boomerang was completely unused by me.
-
Amazon finally let me buy a download code for Mario RPG on virtual console so I didn't have to deal with that old time bullshit points system that I could never figure out how to completely zero out. 3DS and Wii U eShop are still basically lame but at least I can just use the exact amount of money I need on the damn thing.
WE PAID FOR THE DAMN SHIT
-
That first level on Uprising is a long son of a bitch. I hated how it basically sprung a goddamned QTE on you twice. Play it in the Rising mode and get to the second level so you can cheese neverending robo-gators for tons of money so you can get all the useful upgrades.
-
Album rules and you know it.
-
I've now seen two Peckinpah movies that I thought stank. Cross of Iron and Killer Elite. Cross of Iron really suffers because it's one of those movies with accents all over the place. It's also just kind of uninteresting and scatterbrained. Killer Elite is way lamer than a movie that has Duvall along with James Caan and Paulie fighting ninjas on a battleship ought to be.
So far Don Siegel is ahead because I've only hated Black Windmill so far.
-
Garbage game that built nothing upon all the previous games and mainly ripped off Arkham Asylum and Uncharted. You can play Tomb Raider 2 and get the same bad movie puked upon you. This is my main beef with most new games,. Assasssin's Creed 3 just felt like a Sci-Fi movie with a two hundred million budget. Even the best games now just seem like really bad movies with insane budgets.
I will also say that any game that even reaches consideration for any of this horseshit is one of those games that is simply beatable. This means that you are deep in the game and realize that it is easier to beat the game than to stop playing. We have to consider these poor, poor reviewers who've shown themselves to be completely useless.
-
Games I beat this year:
Guacamelee (NEEDED A HARDER BOSS FOR GETTING ALL THE MASK PIECES)
Bioschlock Infantile (GARBAGE)
Dishonored (WEAK FINISH)
New Tomb Raider (GARBAGE)
DMC (GARBAGE)
New Hitman (GARBAGE)
Mario U (GODLY)
NSMB 2 (DAMN NEAR GARBAGE)
Mario 3D land (HOLY SHIT)
Metroid Other M (CONTROLS SUCKED, NO REAL LAST BOSS)
Games that actually came out this year I haven't beat yet but will win:
Link Between Worlds (GAME IS A MOTHERFUCKER)
Super Mario World 3D (IF I HADN'T PLAYED THE 3DS ONE THIS WOULD WIN)
-
Howard Phillips said that the reason they said not to use rubbing alcohol on the back of the cartridges was so kids wouldn't set themselves on fire. Kids were always stupid.
-
Okay I knew this new Zelda was going to let you use any item right from the start. I did not know that you can just rent all the items and unfurl. This game ain't fucking around. No bullshit wallet limit neither. Once you do the first dungeon to get the wall painting ability you can do whatever the fuck you really want. Energy meter makes it so you never are out of bombs or arrows. Fucking game just lets you get on with playing it.
New Mario is good too but this Zelda is a fucking madman.
-
1
-
-
It also let's you fast forward in battles.
-
Get it cheap now. It's either going to spike in price or just become hard to find. Either way it won' be re-released.
-
Imma use this as a platform to bitch about how the free shipping threshold leapt up ten dollars on the month I had a second prime trial. BOLL SHIT. I'll probably sign up legit in January tho'.
-
Okay, I fully beat Super Metroid on the Wii U gamepad screen. At first I hated the d-pad because it seemed like it would always want to cancel out of a spin jump. I still think it's a little oversensitive on the transition from horizontal to diagonal. Contra is prob'ly a no go. On further reflection and testing of a real snes, it seems like the game is just made that way. God damn good. Obviously I ain't goin' to pay this much for pilotwings or vegas stakes but it is still the same fucking insanely good game.
ANIMATED WRESTLING GIFS FOR 2014
in The PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING
Posted