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Posts posted by Cobra Commander
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It's a Tuesday Afternoon. Time to watch some Wrestling. This time around, let's watch some shitty wrestling.
Things I Remember From The 1995 WWF King of the Ring:
Would it shock you to find out that my local video rental stores did not carry this event?
First surprise of the night, Stephanie Wiand is still employed by the WWF and she does an intro for the Savio Vega vs IRS Free For All match
Savio isn't from Puerto Rico at this moment. He's from the South Bronx. This match with IRS goes for a few minutes and ends with a Savio spin kick. It's probably good enough but if you were won over to buy the PPV due to this match, god help ya.
Also, how the fuck did the WWF afford a blimp in 1995? And which warehouse is the Stridex indoor blimp in right now?
We start the PPV proper with Yokozuna vs Savio Vega. This one goes for a few minutes and eventually chicanery has to happen to get Savio past Yoko via countout
Roadie vs Bob Holly was surprisingly good. At least relative to the rest of the card. Bob Holly won his KOTR Qualifier 6 fucking weeks before this PPV. Jesus. Roadie wins with a boot to the face counter and a fucked up three count. Woo more screwy finishes.
Shawn Michaels going to a time limit draw? I can buy that. Kama the Supreme Fighting Machine going to a time limit draw? What. Anyways, Shawn's skin the cat makes me ponder how many pants would have been ruined by a Shawn Michaels vs Ricky Steamboat match. They wade towards the final minute with some slight suspense but surprise, it's a draw. Also the ring announcer, who isn't Finkel, fucked up the announcement of the draw. Who is this guy. What happened to Finkel.
There's a long break after this one where we see a Bob Backlund video package
Now it's Mabel vs the Undertaker. Mabel during this period in-between his heel turn and his King run might actually have the best look he's ever had in the WWF/WWE. But he has a lot of shitty looks in the WWF/E. Also Stephanie Wiand showed up to give Mabel a prematch interview. Mo looks like Evil Biz Markie in his role of being Mabel's cornerman. Mabel's gold entrance shirt is a lot better than his stupid purple gear. This one was sloppy. There's a ref bump. Undertaker chokeslams Mabel. Kama runs down, kicks the Undertaker, Mabel drops a leg, and that's enough for the win. Really. Also, this is during the time that the Undertaker is being stalked by Hot Topic Teens and he doesn't have an urn. Also I noticed ECW's Hat Guy for the first time during this match.
There's another break as we hear about the WWF Hall of Fame inductees. Should I read between the lines with the descriptor "longtime friend" for the guy accepting Ernie Roth's invitation? You can tell how well the WWF was doing in 1995 that they got a video from Bill Murray but Bill Murray didn't give enough of a fuck to show up in person.
And then my internet went down. Eventually I figured out that I could unplug the modem and plug it back in. This, fortunately, did not slow down the updating of my computer. Maybe my modem was trying to stop me from watching this card.
After all that work, I was able to watch Savio Vega vs The Roadie. And it was sloppy as fuck. Like I shouldn't have wondered about Road Dogg doing a Russian Legsweep if he couldn't hit a clean swinging neckbreaker. Eventually heel miscommunication happens and Savio pins Roadie to advance to the finals. Then Savio gives an interview in Spanish as Dok Hendrix tries to be useful.
On paper, the top of this bracket was loaded, and end the end, we got a final of Savio vs Mabel. A real "every top team lost in the NCAA Tournament" King of the Ring.
Bret vs Lawler was an attempt to save the night. It was pretty good. Bret won with the Sharpshooter. They teased the Summerslam 93 finish. Oh yeah, Bret made Lawler kiss his foot and then made Lawler kiss his foot. Also Hakushi ran ineffective interference. Could you believe that this caused the feud to pivot into Bret vs Isaac Yankem.
(around this time I start typing as I watch the show)
Now it's time for the finals. Savio vs Mabel. In theory, all of these Savio matches could have been better. In theory, maybe Savio didn't get his due because a Puerto Rico wasn't the favorite of every smart fan. Also because there's a lot of lumbering dudes working with Savio. Why did Mo dress like a guy working security for MC Hammer while Mabel was dressed like a mattress that hurts people. This tournament feels like it was booked to punish Philadelphia fans. Don't let them act like Roman vs Rock would have been taken any worse than Savio vs Mabel. And eventually the fans start loudly chanting "ECW" during this match. Mabel wins with a Splash. Mo fulfills his role postmatch by eating a punch from Razor. Razor didn't work for a month after this one, so the injury was probably pretty legit and not Scott Hall not wanting to job to Mabel here. Man that skull and crossbones on Mabel's boots is neat. It's also possible that Scott Hall got hurt worse by Mabel. Then the Kid comes in to get beat down by Mabel and Mo too. Man, this postmatch booking is waving red in front of bulls.
Let's take a look at fans leaving the arena before the Mabel coronation ceremony.
Nowadays, you'd bump the coronation to Raw to help fill out a segment the next day. I think this Mabel coronation unintentionally inspired Stone Cold just ignoring all the bullshit in a coronation the next year. They gave Mabel a sword. As if he doesn't have enough ways to hurt people. Then Mo gets a scroll like he's Lord James Blears. And people are throwing shit. South Philly really loves black people. Yeah I was wondering how they would fill 40 minutes with 2 matches before the KOTR finals. How the fuck did Mo fill out a scroll before the match. And Mabel is now King Mabel. Which is actually an upgrade for a ring name. The WWF/E may have never figured out a look for Mabel but I think his names gradually got better. Just imagine if Mabel got a run in WCW in 1993. Also, Razor and friends are rushing the stage in an attempt to save this segment.
You know, Mabel probably should have changed his name after the heel turn. Mo really should have said his name as Morris or something. Then give Sir Morris a move called the Morris Code.
Meanwhile, Jerry Lawler is puking. I mean, that Mabel match wasn't good, but.
More Stephanie Wiand with the heel team in the main event. Stephanie wants to know what they have planned. Hard hitting question. After all this we got a main event with the Native American Tatanka in a tag team match. You know, the whole Tatanka gimmick was sort of a curveball on the usual Native American gimmick until they lost interest. Also having an actual Native American (though the Federal Government doesn't recognize the Lumbee) instead of an Italian helps a tad.
You know, they could have had this tag match at In Your House and then jobbed Bam Bam to Mabel for KOTR.
Gotta love how Sid gets to keep his music while being ineffectively managed by DiBiase. Heel Tatanka really could have went a few better ways but they didn't really care and he pretty much gradually went away.
You know, it was either this or Great American Bash 1991 in the echelons of shitty PPVs I haven't seen before.
Diesel and Bam Bam Bigelow, a total normal tag team where Bam Bam isn't being squeezed out of the picture by Diesel and his friends. Also gotta love doing the backstage interviews well in advance so that they're in street clothes.
Bam Bam decided to add more fire and pieces of flare to his outfit after turning face.
Gotta love how they had these doormen at the KOTR PPV in 95 and 96 before Ahmed wiped them out in 1996. So does Diesel have a Lex Luger Forearm of death with that Elbow Gear on. Imagine all the guys not on this card and we got two Roadie matches. Tatanka as a heel could have leaned more into looking like a redneck because he kinda looks like a dude from Oklahoma at this time. Cool, a match built around working Kevin Nash's arm. Tatanka doing some stereotypical offense to work the elbow. This heel turn was a mistake, wasn't it? Bam Bam threatens to make this match interesting with some hot offense. I don't really get Bam Bam doing a DDT since he has a giant back and would probably take the brunt of the move. But he also does diving headbutts, so. Sid chokeslams Bam Bam off the second rope which is the sort of cool looking move you don't expect in the middle of this match. Maybe a certain amount of the "Kevin Nash sucked as WWF champ" talk is really about him spending months working Sid and Mabel. But yeah, when all the other hot acts are babyfaces. I missed a few minutes assembling tacos for dinner. Did Tatanka take a flat back bump for an enziguri. Tatanka eats a lazy powerbomb and Diesel pulls him up. Sid walks out instead of fighting Diesel, so Diesel drops an elbow to beat Tatanka. Hey, doesn't Tatanka look like a moron for staying heel after that.
and that's all folks...
what a show... I guess
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35 minutes ago, Curt McGirt said:
The key to all of this is, funny enough, really really simple.
People like Rocky.
He seems like a nice guy, he's sexy, he's well-spoken, he seems funny and happy. He has the public's goodwill, and that is worth more than any successful venture, and something you cannot buy.
Also gotta admit that he has had one of the lower drama divorces you'll ever see from a famous person, to the point that he's working with his ex-wife pretty regularly. So he made it through one potential minefield without damage
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the Super Bowl FG record being 54 yards was surprising (and it goes back to Steve Christie)
not as surprising as the NFL record for longest punt return being 61 yards, before the Toney return last year (BTW, Toney was an inactive for this one and he's probably on his way out of KC)
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I don't know how long one is supposed to be in hit movies before it's a success no matter the dropoff
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there were 4 field goals of less than 30 yards, including 3 Chiefs field goals of 24, 28, and 29
(which kinda makes the "Butker for SB MVP" tweets amusing)
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3 minutes ago, Travis Sheldon said:
I'm ready for the ghost of Al Davis to cut the power to this shit show.
Al Davis is currently trying to attack the Las Vegas stadium to move back to Oakland
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oh yeah John Elway, present that trophy
(fuck John Elway)
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congrats to the people in the KC area getting out of a Valentines Day dinner because they took their significant other to a Super Bowl parade instead
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congrats to Taylor Swift on having won more Super Bowls since 1996 than the San Francisco 49ers and Dallas Cowboys
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Pacheco's avg yards per rush isn't enough to get a first down on 3 rushes.. which tells you a little about how his night has gone as a runner
also this game would be over now if he didn't fumble in the red zone
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tough one for the "defense wins championships" thing if the Chiefs defense, which has carried the team, is what costs them here
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they weren't about to let this game end on a second possession field goal
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1 minute ago, Kuetsar said:
or a safety. . .
watch them accidentally forget the possibility of safeties and force the team up 2 points to take a knee 4 times to win the Super Bowl
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BREAKING: you gotta give your best players the football to win the Super Bowl here
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1 minute ago, Brian Fowler said:
So even a touchdown on the drive doesn't end it anymore, right?
unless it's on a turnover
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why yes, a kicker has never won Super Bowl MVP
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I figure the offenses in this game aren't exactly inspiring many extra penalties, especially not offensive holding penalties
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if only Pacheco didn't fumble in the red zone and the Chiefs didn't have to hit multiple chip shot field goals after short circuiting in the red zone
(also, only TD came on a gift turnover)
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excited to find out how many times the Chiefs center can mess up snaps before it leads to something bad
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the fun part about the turnover on the punt was that the Chiefs threw on 3rd and 2 and punted on 4th and 2
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Just imagine all the chaos if they stopped splitting timeouts between first/second half and just gave the teams 5 timeouts for the entire game. It's not like most of those first half TOs get used anyways.
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usually don't see a team kill their own momentum with a timeout as much as the Chiefs just did
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3 minutes ago, dogwelder said:
WTF at the commercial for RFK Jr???
well, it's by a superPAC (that might be funded by people supporting another campaign)
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Chiefs won the Super Bowl and nudged Bieniemy out of town.
Just saying... with how Bieniemy is available and the offense is looking horrid tonight
FEBRUARY 2024 Wrestling Talk
in The PROFESSIONAL WRESTLING
Posted
I don't think the domestic violence accusations have slowed Austin down much but it probably placed a hard ceiling on how far he could get pushed in movies before someone realized "hey wait a minute"