RUkered

Damn it. I had repressed all memory of his annoying voice. "HOOOOO MY DEAR BOY...." I really want to go back and play the first one again to see how many people I forgot about. I know Bill and Dutch and that's about it. Since I think I'm getting close to the end...

Apparently my Arthur is anorexic. Every time I check, he's underweight, so I ate all 10 assorted biscuits I had and then ate a stew bowl at camp. Did the mission where And checked my weight again. Still underweight. Apparently I need to trade in the treadmill for gun fights to get in shape.

Just saw someone get a chamber pot accidentally dumped on his head in the street and I'm still laughing. Love this game. "LET'S GO. I'M ALREADY SHIT-SPLATTERED," is not a thing I ever thought I would hear in a game.

This is how I am with legendary pelts. I know you can still sell them even if you lose it, but it's an immersion thing for me or something. "Can you spare some change for a blind man?" "Sorry bout your damn luck. I have a pelt worth at least $30 to deliver when I have almost 3 grand and don't need the money." Charitable in this game, I am not. I have run across two wagon holdups and haven't been able to save the people yet. It just reminds me of how shitty I was at saving people from a hanging in Red Dead 1. Also, pro tip for anyone who wants to break a horse if you're an absolute moron like I am. I spent about 30 minutes just trying to get that white Arabian horse up by the lake in the northwest corner of the map because I misinterpreted the instructions. Don't push the left stick in; pull it down toward you.

I was going to try to phonetically type out some Braithwaite dialog in his voice, but I realized that shit is basically impossible since his stage voice sounds like somebody finger diddling a party whistle. Is anyone else having an issue with icons disappearing? I used to see two trapper icons on the map, and now the only one available is the dude in St Denis. Then last night, I was going to drop off my first perfect pelt to the butcher in Strawberry, but his icon was missing as well. Fortunately, I remembered where he was and he was still there and I was able to sell to him, but I don't know if it's something I fucked up or it's just a glitch.

You're only able to say that because you're in singeplayer where no one can see you. We all know once online launches, you and melraz will be in a "rolling block off" contest on some poor fuckers just trying to make a stew at camp. I'm pretty sure I just did the mission in Valentine that Rippa mentioned a page or two back. It was fun as shit, the payout was great, and yeah... won't be going back for a while. One question - does St Denis really not have a hotel? Seems strange to me given how big it is. I can't believe there are only two places to take a bath (at least as far as I have been on the map.) I have decided I suck shit at getting pristine pelts, so for now I switched focus to legendary animals. Finally got revenge on the bear that ate my ass off the first time I found him. Went on the high side and shot him with the rolling block, which just pissed him off. I fumbled the controls and he got too close, so I panicked and spammed deadeye with the pump shotgun in his face. Not much face left after that.

I'm with you on that one. I always tell myself that I'll ride so I can see random events, but I inevitably give up, trigger cinematic view, and go to the bathroom or something.

My favorite part of this thread so far is Rippa cussing out Micah every third post. Shit is comedy gold. So in "how to go from feeling like a badass to a dumbass in 10 seconds" 101, I'll give y'all the recipe. 1 - Ride up on some O'Driscolls on a bridge who tell you to turn away because it's their bridge. 2- Say out loud "The fuck it is," chug some deadeye tonic and proceed to wipe out all five of them with dual pistols. 3- Feeling as confident and cocky as Ric Flair in a new $5,000 suit, walk over to loot the bodies. 4-Fucking fall off the bridge like a dipshit, die, and lose the awesome new hat you just put on.

Am I just an idiot, or do I not understand clothes? I see people online dressed as Doc Holiday and Calvin Candy and then I look at the catalogue in Saint Denis like "uhhhhhh......I can't tell what this jacket will look like if I buy it." Am I missing a preview button or something? Either way, as a result of my confusion, Arthur is still wearing the same shit he has from the beginning.

I ran into the dude's horse, knocking us all over and killing the kidnapper and the lady. You and I should quit the hero game.

I haven't run into them yet, but I saw a video of that on Reddit and I would have shit my pants if it happened to me. Also saw a video of a guy walking into a tiny cabin and a gigantic ass bear was in it. This game is basically a Friday the 13th movie.

Every time I see The Heartlands on the map, I hear Melraz singing George Strait.

I'm wondering if it gets harder as you progress because I whooped his ass, and I sucked at it in the first game. I looked at the buttons when it was his turn and then just spammed the shit out of them when it was my turn. Easy as pie. It has to get harder - it just has to.

*gets shot to shit up at Fort Wallace* "Ohhhh, so THAT'S why the area was marked in red." Not a whole lot bothers me when it comes to animal stuff unlike my wife who I had to basically do a sales pitch to convince her to watch John Wick because of what happens in the beginning, but when my horse got shot and was trying to get back up before finally dying, I was like, "Goddamn, game......did you really have to do all that?" Also, you guys are killing me talking about all these easter eggs. I want to find out what it is, but as has been mentioned by all the other old coots in this thread, if it's people from the first game that I'm supposed to remember besides Dutch, Bill, Abigail, and Uncle, then it won't mean shit to me anyway.

I found a fence down in Saint Denis and sold the gold bar I got from the place at the end of that video Rippa posted a couple pages back. And like Robert, I finally smacked into my first tree. Shit was hilarious. I was in the middle of a conversation with an NPC and the next thing I know, I'm on the ground and my horse is running off. Turns out a wagon smacked into me. Fucking texting and wagoning, I bet.

My dumbass is failing to remember how to do the spoiler box right now, so I'll just speak vaguely instead. To your second point, I am only barely into chapter 2 and they have brought that shit up so many times that I feel like I'm listening to Uncle Rico talk about how he'd have won state. Since Stout coined the term Mary Lou, I'd like to throw my hat in the ring early as calling the new dodge move the "Tom Brady." I'm open to all suggestions and improvements.

Sorry for the double post. I have been good about not spoiling myself, but you're like the third or fourth person online that I have seen reference that mission and/or say it's hilarious. Can't wait to get to it.

I'm kind of second guessing my memory now because I was getting really tired when I did it, but I'm pretty sure it was an option when I died. Something like: Restart Mission, Restart from last checkpoint, and a third option I can't recall.

I spent the better part of 45 minutes trying to get my horse back that had all my shit on it. I accidentally stole one and didn't even realize it until the game prompted me to return it. I wasn't paying attention when I rode by the guy who yelled "Hey that's my horse!" My wife caught it though, so I rode back but could never find the guy again. I hitched it and hoped it would count as returned, but then I realized I was stuck on foot, so I put on my mask and shot a guy off his wagon. Instant bounty. I loaded from my previous checkpoint - still the damn temporary horse. Decided to drown it in a river, but couldn't find a deep spot, so all I did was slowwwwwwly walk down the water for 10 minutes. I couldn't shoot it, couldn't find the stable to sell it, etc. I finally died and both horses were on the map again, so I ran forever to get to it bc I was afraid to whistle. Also, to piggyback on one of Phil's comments, I finally gave up on keeping up with my hat. They should have named this Red Dead: Where'd Mah Shit Go?

That shit was hilarious. If y'all remember the gang hideout where you went into the mine, when you came back out, a bunch of guys would rush out of the building to the right. If you timed it right and hauled ass, you could bust through the door with lit dynamite and wipe them all out. Now I just want to see all the ways Robert can dream up to blow shit up. I was an English major. Need I say more? Math is the devil, Bobby.

Melraz and I had RDR1 for Playstation and spent many a drunken night clearing out gang hideouts and then finishing up with poker. I didn't even make the connection with GTA until I read your post, but we often finished off a night of GTAO with golf. And you can ask Mel about this, but if they have Liar's Dice in this fucking game and y'all want to play it, I'm signing off. It's the gaming equivalent of doing math in my head. I don't get it, never will, and I hate it.

Yeah - he pre-ordered the Ultimate edition. Said his wife had Friday and Saturday off, so he might not have much playing time until Sunday. That's definitely all I'm doing Sunday as soon as I get back in town. Well, after 17 billion hours of install time...

It was briefly mentioned in the GTA thread, but yeah, you're right. There's a revolver and a hatchet (or axe - something like that). Both are pretty easy to get.

I am also an old coot who likes physical copies, so I reckon no preloading for me. The biggest kick in the dick is that it's supposed to be delivered Friday, but I have to head out of town for the weekend. I might just fake my own death and go hide in that cabin with Elvis and Jimmy Hoffa.